Chapter 2: Cigarette

The ride home on the subway was silent. The only thing that could be heard was the occasional cough to her left.

She stared at her hands that were folded in her lap. Her fingers were interlaced with each other. She rubbed her thumb across the back of her cold and clammy hand.

Her eyes stayed open. She couldn't remember the last time she blinked. However, her eyes weren't drying out or hurting. They just stayed glued to her hands below her.

The subway suddenly lurched to a stop. She had finally made it back to the Vinewood stop.

She quickly made her way through the bustling crowd and into dark streets of Hillwood.

The temperature had significantly dropped since the sun had fallen over the city. A cold breeze sent a shiver down her spine as she started her way back to the boarding house and away from the crowd.

She thought about the bullet ridden hat she had in her backpack. Was this a sign, was Arnold Phillip Shortman really dead?

Once she saw the crowd was gone, she pulled her backpack off of her back to take out the hat.

She carefully cradled the small fabric in her hand. Cold wind blew through the holes and onto her hands, causing another shiver to run down her spine.

"Maybe everyone was right." She said to no one as she picked up her pace down the street." Maybe I am crazy. Maybe all this shit everyone has been telling me is true. Maybe Arnold really is…"

She couldn't bring herself to say it. No, there was no way she could tell herself he was dead. She couldn't believe it, not yet.

She quickly pulled out a small package out of the side pocket of her backpack. She quickly broke the seal on it, and pulled out a small cigarette.

Not long after Arnold had been confirmed deceased, she had started this nasty habit. Although, she wasn't really the one to blame…

...

One month ago

"Olga, is it okay if I come outside?"

Her older sister crooked her head to the left and smiled at her." Why yes baby sister. Come come."

Helga sighed to see Olga was still overly optimistic as ever. All her work of trying to get Bob out of prison was making her just as stressed as Helga had been trying to find Arnold.

Olga took a long hit of her cigarette and blew the smoke out into the pitch dark night sky. The only light they had outside was the small streetlight above them.

Helga stepped off of the boarding house stoop to lean against the brick of the boarding house beside her older sister. She took a deep sigh and placed her cold hands into the front pocket of Arnold's blue hoodie she was currently wearing.

"You seem stressed baby sister." Olga said as she took another long drag from her cigarette, lighting up her face with the small flame it created.

"I guess you could call it that." Helga replied as she stared at the ground awkwardly. It wasn't too often she and Olga would have talks like this, but it was becoming more of a common thing as the weeks progressed.

As it turned out, Olga wasn't as bad as she seemed to be. At least, she didn't act like it. No strange men had been sneaking into her boarding room house to see her for "business meetings."

It was almost like Bob being in jail had helped her a little bit. Helga didn't whole heartedly agree with her on trying to get Bob out, but at least it was helping Olga.

"Well." Olga said with a sigh as she threw her cigarette to the cold ground below." I may have something that could help."

Helga watched as her sister pulled a small, white pack of cigarettes out of her bra. She quickly opened up the half empty box and pulled out two cigarettes. She took one for herself and offered a hand out to Helga.

"Are you serious?" Helga asked, a little taken back her sister would offer her a cigarette.

"I'm sure baby sister." Olga said in a light tone with a nod." Now take it. I'll light it for you."

Helga normally wouldn't have ever taken an offer like this, but she was desperate. She needed anything to try and take her stress away for just a moment. It had been basically eating her alive for weeks now.

Quickly, Helga took the cigarette and placed her between her cold lips. Olga quickly lit up her cigarette, and leaned over to do the same to her sister's.

Helga quickly leaned over to Olga and felt the heat of the small flame in front of her.

As soon as she saw the paper was lit, she sucked in as much as air as her lungs could handle.

The result was bad. She instantly had a coughing attack. Her lungs felt like they burst open as she rapidly coughed, barely hanging on to her cigarette.

To her right, she could hear Olga giggle." Don't worry Helga. I did the same thing when I first smoked."

"Thanks for… the heads… up." Helga said in between coughs.

Finally, after a few moments of catching her breath, Helga took a more prepared hit from her cigarette.

She barely did it, but she held her breath in this time and gently let the smoke out without a cough.

In result, she felt a calm wave of emotions flow over her for the first time in weeks. She took another small hit and blew out the smoke, and it only seemed to get better.

Her stress seemed to be gone, just like that. For the first time in weeks, her head was cleared. Helga hadn't been expecting this. She thought people started smoking because they were just addicted. She didn't know that cigarettes were stress relievers as well.

"You're getting a lot better at that baby sister." Olga said as she took another hit from her cigarette.

Helga laughed as she blew smoke out into the pitch black night sky again.

"Yeah, I guess you could say that."

…

Present time

Helga threw her cigarette to the side as she blew out one last huff of smoke into the night sky." I really need to quit smoking those damn things." She muttered to herself somberly as she approached the well lit boarding house.

She slung her backpack off of herselt to hide her cigarettes and Arnold's blue hat. She quickly shoved the cigarettes in the front pocket of her backpack. However, she paused before she put Arnold's bullet ridden hat back in her backpack.

Tears threatened to fall from her eyes. She let out a shaky sigh as she rubbed the soft fabric on the bill of his hat. Somehow no bullets had hit that part.

Trying to choke down her tears, she shoved the hat down into her back." Time to put another fake smile on." She muttered as she sniffled and zipped the backpack shut.

After collecting herself for a few moments, she quickly walked up the stoop and went to open the door." I really just wanna be left alone." She muttered to herself." Please let everyone be asleep."

She opened the door to the opposite thing she had just wished for.

"Hey Helga!" Miriam announced over enthusiastically from the kitchen." Do you want some soup? It's still warm!"

Helga closed the door behind her and walked to see her mother and Phil sitting in the kitchen, both with weak and tired smiles on their faces.

It wasn't an unfamiliar sight. She knew her mother had been tired as hell lately with trying to find a stable job around the neighborhood. So far, they hadn't had any business moguls wanting to take the beeper store off their hands. She could tell the stress was really getting to Miriam.

'At least she hasn't started back drinking… yet.' Helga thought to herself as she shifted her eyes to Phil, sitting at the left side of the table.

Phil had worn that same tired smile since Arnold had disappeared. She could tell he hadn't been sleeping at night, between Arnold and his wife in the retirement home, she knew he wasn't doing good himself.

' At least he's doing better than Stella and Miles.' She thought to herself.

Helga just tried to put on her best act and shrugged her shoulder at her mother, who was still waiting for a response. As hungry as she was, she just wasn't feeling any soup. She just needed to be alone.

"I'm good mom. I think I'm just gonna go upstairs and take a shower." She finally replied in a dry tone.

And with that, Helga left a concerned Miriam and Phil alone in the kitchen.

…

"I'm worried about her Phil." Miriam said with a worried sigh as took a seat across the kitchen table from Phil." I mean, she hasn't been eating. She stays out for hours on end. I just, need some help."

"I know." Phil said with a somber sigh as he lifted up his white mug of cold coffee and took a sip." I'm sorry about Helga. I really am. But I mean hell, I'm worried about everyone these days."

Miriam saw the depressed look on the man's face. She hadn't been a real good mom or person in the past, but now was her time to help. Hell, if she couldn't help them, then she could at least show some sympathy.

"Well, I understand how you feel." Miriam said with a sigh as she too took a sip of her cold coffee." Stella and Miles haven't been exactly doing real great for themselves since Arnold…" She cut herself off from saying the rest.

"You can say it." Phil said somberly with another sigh." We can't help but face what's happened. So, we might as well accept it."

"I know." Miriam said, sifting her eyes down to the table." I'm so sorry. For everything Phil."

Phil leaned back in his chair and rubbed his tired eyes." It's okay Miriam. None of this was your fault. You just need to focus on that girl. And how you can help her with whatever she's going through."

Miriam looked away from Phil and back up to the staircase that Helga had just walked up."Yeah." She said with a quick sigh." I know."

…

"Ughhhhhh. Stella, you're taking too long in the shower again." A drunken Miles groaned as he beat on the bathroom door.

"Hold on honey." A drunken Stella replied from behind the door." I can't find a towel!"

"But you said that ten minutes ago!" Mikes groaned in response as he turned to face Helga who was busy trying to get into her boarding house room.

"Ohhhhh, heyyyyyy Helgaaaaa." Miles slurred as he waved at her and propped up against the door.

Helga looked over her left shoulder and faked the biggest smile she could have ever faked." Hey Miles."

It wasn't the first fake smile she had faked in the last few. After Arnold's funeral. Miles and Stella hit rock bottom. Especially Miles, as he was the first one to start drinking. He came home late one night with a fresh bottle of whiskey in his hand. A few weeks later, Helga found him and Stella both drunk off their asses laughing at a fly on the ceiling of their bedroom.

It honestly was a sad thing to watch. It reminded Helga of how bad Miriam used to be when she would drink like that. Helga was beyond thankful her mother made the choice to sober up. She couldn't even imagine how Arnold would feel if he saw his parents like this.

Thankfully for Helga, Miles just turned his back and rested his head against the wall of the bathroom, leaving Helga be. Miles wasn't violent at all when he got drunk. But, he could be very annoying with his slurred and very confused talking, which was normally just gibberish.

Helga quickly fumbled with the door handle and made her way back into the empty bedroom.

Not even bothering to take off her dirty clothes, she instantly threw her backpack to the side and flopped down onto her bed.

She was exhausted, and even though she knew she had loads of homework to do, she honestly did not care. Her grades had dropped off significantly after Arnold disappeared.

Or died.

She honestly didn't wanna think about it. She wanted to save it for tomorrow. Instead, she tried to shove all her thoughts to the side, and drift off into a deep sleep.

…

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Phil asked in an unsure tone as he stood up from the kitchen table.

"I'm sure." Miriam said from the hallway." It's what's best for her."

"Whatever you say." Phil said with a sigh." You're the mother. You know her best."

Miriam dialed the last number in the old fashioned phone and put it up to her ear.

RING RING RING

Finally, a voice crackled through the phone.

"Hello, this is Miriam Pataki." She said with a sigh." Can you connect me to Dr. Bliss's office?"

Author's note: Sorry for the long wait! I know you guys have been wanting another chapter! So, here it is! I'm sorry for the somber tone of the story so far! When the school scenes come back in the upcoming chapters there will be more comic relief I promise. Also, sorry about Phil's kinda out of character tone in this chapter. But, I mean, he does think his grandson is dead! But anyways, thank you for all the continued support! It means the world to me! Keep those kind reviews coming! I hope that you guys enjoy!