Chapter 16

Sophie sat and stared at the envelope, she was afraid to open it afraid of what it represented even though she knew Nate was gone, this was his goodbye to her, to them, to his son who he had never met, she was sure of that and she did not want to read it. She could feel all their eyes on her as she held the envelope almost caressing it as she turned it over in her hands. None of the others spoke, she would open it when she did and they were happy to sit and wait quietly, they also knew this was a letter Nate had written to her in case he had died, so it was his goodbye. Eliot watched her closely, at least he thought, this would give her something, give her some form of closure he hoped.

Sophie slowly turned the envelope over in her hands and then opened it but did not touch the single page that was inside. She drew in a shaky breath and looked up at the rest blinking back her tears. Then she handed Eliot the envelope, this was Nate's letter to her but she was sure to them too and she could not read it, she could not give voice to his final words and she knew Eliot would be able to do that for her. Eliot took the envelope and pulled out the letter opening it up and drawing in a breath he started to read it out loud.

"My dearest Sophie, if you are reading this then I will not be returning home to you and our beautiful son Michael. I am so sorry Sophie, I failed to honour the promise that I made to come back to you, but you must know that I tried, I would never leave you Sophie, none of you, none of my family not willingly.

The details of what happened are not important my darling and that is not why I am writing this note. I also want to make sure that should this note be given to you that you do not take any action against the man who orchestrated this, he was trying to save his son, his family and although it has cost my life I hope that I did succeed because family is the reason I was still alive to do this job. Sophie, you, Eliot, Hardison and Parker and now our son Michael are my family, my only family and I love you more than any of you will ever know.

My darling, I know it took me a long time to admit that I loved you, and I know the road to where we were before this happened was a long and sometimes difficult one, but you must know that you are the reason for me changing, for me becoming a better man, a man who could start to live and to love again. You and the others gave me back my life and I will always be grateful for that.

I was so excited for the birth of our son and I regret that I will never know him, never have a chance to watch him grow to see the man he will become. I console myself with the knowledge that he has the best mother in the world, somebody who will love and nurture him, help him to reach his goals, to achieve his dreams. I also know that Eliot, Parker and Hardison will give him all the love and care they can, that you will all keep him safe and allow him to explore his horizons.

Now I must go my love. I just need you to know that my last thoughts are of you and our son, of my family, all of you. Take care of each other, love each other, and always remember that family is what makes this world bearable.

Love always

Your Nate."

Sophie listened to the words tears running unheeded down her cheeks as Eliot read Nates last message to her and to them. She looked at Parker who also had tears in her eyes as did Hardison and she could hear in Eliot's voice that the emotion was starting to overwhelm him as he read. When he was finished she looked at Eliot. Then at the others but spoke to the Hitter.

"We will honour his wishes Eliot, there will be no reprisals on Morero or on Bronovich, we will let him rest in peace and we will go on as he asked. We will make sure Michael knows his father and we will be…we will be together. He loved us, all of us and now he is gone but he will never be gone, never, he is with us and we have a part of him in Michael."

Eliot nodded not trusting himself to speak at that moment. He would do as Sophie asked and he would not take his revenge on the people that took away the man he admired above all others and he would honour Nate's wishes.

"Good. Now I am going to be with my son." She said standing up. "Tomorrow we can…we can make…arrangements." She said. They had to do that, they had to lay Nate to rest and give him peace and so that they could say their last goodbyes to him so that they could move on.

"Sophie…"

"He loved you Parker, you meant so much to him, all of you did, now we need to honour him and to do what he asked, we need to take care of each other and of his son." Sophie said looking at the woman and smiled a sad smile. "I will see you all in the morning."

She walked away from them into the nursery and closed the door, she needed to be with her son, with his son and she wanted to be alone, she could not deal with their grief as well as her own, not now, tomorrow she would be the strong one, she would help them and they would help her, but now, now she needed to be here with Michael and she had to let her own emotions flow out of her before she could help them deal with theirs.