Thanks for pointing out that there was one victor after Johanna, I completely forgot about the Mockingjay podiums. I edited chapter 24 to correct it. Also thanks to everyone who follows this story. You are really cool people!

Day 15 - Waiting

We barely talk that afternoon, the heavy veil of death still lingering above, still so close. No more sponsorship - it doesn't matter. We already have weapons and if we get injured now, there is no time for healing anyways.

Very soon - way too soon - at least one of us will need to die anyway. This fact lurks in the back of my mind constantly. Even if we refuse to kill each other, they'll find a way. There won't be any chance for us to make it through this together.

I resist the urge to chew on my lips again and sigh. I feel lost. For the first time in this arena, I have no clue on what to do.

"What are we going to do?" I say as I turn around to face Cyo.

He looks at me and just shakes his head. "I'm supposed to be the one asking you... I have no clue how to fight."

I look away again. "I can't say for sure... it's Rex we are talking about. I have no clue where he is, if he is injured in any way or which weapons he uses currently."

Cyo pauses before saying, "What if we just stay here and wait for him to come to us? We'll have to face him eventually - so what difference does it make?"

I consider this briefly. It's not a bad idea, considering the lack of alternatives. "We could do that... maybe that way we still have a day or two to prepare ourselves."

He nods and then changes the topic fast, "We should eat something..."

He's right, we need every kind of energy we can get. I stand and make my way over to him and sit down. We look through the backpack and take a granola bar and some sort of sandwich each.

As we are eating, the hymn starts playing and Ayla's face flashes across the sky. Probably the government isn't upset that Ayla didn't win. She's from a district of potential rebels and her attitude might turn against the Gamemakers and the president very soon after the Games.

They for sure want Rex as a victor. A career tribute - strong and loyal and a symbol for the Hunger Games, someone who enjoys this.

I eat the last of my granola bar when my train of thought ends. Maybe Marlon was right and I should have worried about Rex way sooner - now it comes sudden and I feel like we have no chance. It's intimidating.

Cyo's voice brings me back to the here and now, "We should go to sleep. It's been a long day..."

I only nod. "Right... it's getting late."

We set up camp again and hesitantly I get into the sleeping bag with Cyo. He sighs and puts his arms around me. "Stop thinking about it... it's not helpful."

A small smile reaches my lips. Of course, he notices. I turn my head to face him and say, "It's kind of hard to stop thinking about it, you know?"

He smiles too. "I know... but we can't do anything about it anyway. Or would you feel better, if we look for him?"

I shake my head immediately. "No... we shouldn't waste too much energy on looking for one person in a huge arena. We should stay."

Cyo presses a kiss on my cheek and mumbles, "Let's just wait it out and look at the stars."

I smirk. It's cute how he tries to find something to distract us from... everything. "Those are not the real stars - you know that, right?"

That makes him grin. "Yes... I mean, I know because everything here is fake. It still looks real."

I shake my head lightly and look up at the night sky. "It doesn't. It still does look beautiful, but not real. They just placed the stars randomly up there. In the real sky, they have a specific pattern."

"I never really thought about that... does that matter to you?" I steal a glance at Cyo as he speaks. He is now looking up at the sky too.

I quickly think about it. Why does it matter to me that those are not the real stars? The real stars remind me of home and Cato, maybe that's why. These ones are just not the same. I try to sort out my thoughts, then I say, "Kind of. The fact that these are not the same stars I watched from the roof of our house - it makes them feel like a mockery rather than something nice."

He's silent for a short while. Then Cyo says, "I see. It's like... connecting all the districts. Even though most people can never leave their district in their lives, we're still all living under the same sky."

I smile and turn to him. "That's right... I know this arena is fairly close to where I live, it's even in the same district, but I've never felt so far away from home - not even in the Capitol."

Cyo sighs and now turns to face me too. "I miss home... and my family."

This makes me think about my own mother at home. My mother who is probably watching TV every waking hour, just to know she still has a child. It probably makes me look more upset than I originally thought because Cyo brings it up, "What's wrong? Did I say something inappropriate?"

I shake my head and sit up. "No, I just realized how much I miss my family. That I shouldn't have left them, shouldn't have been so selfish."

Now he sits up too and says, "It's okay, Val..."

I sigh. If only it were okay. "No... it's not. It's my fault that my mother will be left alone, childless, and sad. She warned us to never volunteer... now she has lost us both in the Games"

I feel his arms wrap around me protectively and immediately I lean on him for comfort. His voice is soothing in my ear, "Don't say that... you can still survive this and go home."

I know he's right and that there is a chance that I might become the victor, but I don't know if that would be right, so I quietly say, "If that were the case, you would be dead... and I won't allow it. You will see your sister again."

"She'll do okay without me... it's just a bit unfortunate that nobody can take tesserae for all of them next year. I don't want my brothers to go hungry..."

That makes me realize something - Cyo doesn't care about himself, he doesn't care if he dies, he's just worried, his family might struggle without the support he provided up to this point.

I press my lips together, then I turn to look him in the eye. "Listen... let's make a deal, okay?"

Cyo looks at me confused. "What kind of a deal?"

"If you survive this shit, you will visit my parents - give them some sort of comfort. If I survive I'll make sure your family does never go hungry, that they can buy everything they need. I'll find a way..."

A moment later his lips are on mine, stopping me from rambling about this further. I kiss him back, pulling him close, embracing the warmth of his touch, the feeling of his lips on mine. When he breaks the kiss, he lets his hand rest on my cheek, painting circles with his thumb. "I really do love you..."

I smile. "As far as I can tell what love is - I love you, too."

That comment makes him smirk. "That sounded kind of deep."

"Sometimes I am kind of deep... but most of the time I'm just really stupid."

We both laugh and he rolls his eyes. "Yeah... you're pretty much the only person who thinks that."

I grin and say, "Your opinion doesn't count because you're in love with me."

Cyo laughs again, God, it's so cute when he is laughing. "Okay... if you say so..."

I smirk and lie back down. "Come on... let's look at the fake stars again and sleep."

Cyo follows my example and pulls me close again. "Sounds like a plan."

I listen to his heartbeat for a while. How would I even be able to move on, if he was to die? I can't lose him, now that I've found him. He should become the victor, he's stronger. I hesitate but then I whisper, "When you win... don't cry for me, okay?"

He is quick to respond, "IF I win... I will do nothing but cry for you."

I swallow. "I don't like the thought of you being sad..."

He sighs and says, "I also don't like the thought of you being sad... but it's still better for one of us to win than Rex."

"Of course... Rex would be collateral damage for us," I say. That reminds me of the fact that Rex is still out there and could find us here any minute. I think I'm not sleeping much tonight.

I turn slightly and look at the still trees, maybe expecting to see some movement, but there is nothing. Then I hear Cyo speak up again, "You said, you live in Victor's Village?"

I am glad he's talking to me, makes it easier to distract myself from what's to come. "Yes... I've always lived there."

"Who of your parents is a victor?" I can't tell if it's actually interesting to him or if he just prefers casual conversation over silence, but it doesn't matter, really.

"My mom. She won the 48th Hunger Games when she was 17 - so a while ago." I sometimes wonder, if she still thinks about that a lot or if she's over it completely. Now that I'm here, in the arena, I don't think anyone could get over this so easily.

I feel Cyo shift lightly and eye me before he turns his eyes back to the sky. "Did you ever watch that?"

I nod briefly and say, "Yes... I've watched all of the previous Games."

"What was it like?"

I think about it for a second. What was it like? I can't really tell, it felt like any other Games. "It was like I'm watching a couple of strangers. It never really hit me that it was my mother. She does look very different now, and also acts very differently. She's nothing like the person I watched compete in the Hunger Games."

Cyo stays silent for a few minutes after that. Then he mumbles, "I guess the arena changes everyone... you can't come out the same."

"True...", I say, now looking at him.

Cyo sighs and looks away from the sky to meet my eyes. He smiles a small smile. "Let's sleep for real... Goodnight, Val."

I smile too, but not genuinely, my thoughts still on what my mother experienced during her Games. "Goodnight, Cyo."