Hi everyone. MC just sent me an email letting me know that The Trip has been NOMINATED for The Hidden Star Award of "Hottest Lemon"!
Holy crap! THANK YOU to whoever nominated me. Let me know who you are so I can thank you personally.
Voting is only this weekend (February 10-12) so head over there now and vote for The Trip. Copy and paste the link below into your browser, take out the spaces and replace the (dot)s with periods to get to the site. To see all the nominees, click the "Nominees" tab at the top. The Trip is under the "Hottest Lemon" section. TO VOTE: Click the "Vote" tab at the top.
http: / / www(dot)thehiddenstarawards(dot)blogspot(dot)com
Thank you again to whoever nominated The Trip. XOXOXOXO
I hurried up and finished getting Chapter 24 ready to post as a thank you. So here it is. (Thanks MC for betaing and thanks to all of you reading, reviewing & recing.)
Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight and all its characters. This AH version of events is mine.
Enjoy.
Chapter 24: The Premiere
My flight landed at LAX just after noon. I was so excited to see Edward that I felt like I was going to begin bouncing off the walls. Actually it felt more like I was a drug addict twitching uncontrollably from withdrawal of a highly addictive drug, because I was and my highly addictive drug was Edward. I was so close to seeing him again, I could almost smell him, taste him, feel him.
Hmmm.
I made my way across the airport with my carry-on luggage. Despite my argument, Edward had a car pick me up at the airport. A man with a suit and hat greeted me, smiling warmly. He insisted on taking my small carry-on bag despite the fact that I told him I could do it myself. He then led me to the car. Well, I thought it was going to be a car, but it was actually a small limo.
I shook my head, sighed petulantly and weightlessly cursed Edward in my head. He knew I didn't want silly extravagances. I didn't need them.
I slipped into the limo, feeling out of place—especially when I was wearing a plain t-shirt and jeans—then the driver closed the door behind me. I sent Edward a text, so when he landed he'd know I had arrived without issue, as the driver began navigating the busy highways taking me to Alice—apparently she had staked claim over me for the next several hours until the Premiere.
I groaned at the thought. I was in for an afternoon of make-up, hair and dresses. It slightly soured my excitement to see her because it wasn't my kind of idea of fun, and I didn't need to be doted on and fawned over.
The driver stopped in front of a glass-front salon and spa. I grabbed my phone, shoved it in my purse and then went to grab the handle, but the driver was faster, already opening the door for me.
I mumbled an awkward thank you as Alice came bounding out the door of the place.
"Bella!" she greeted excitedly with her signature bubbly smile and wrapped her arms tightly around me.
"Hi Alice," I laughed hugging her back lightly.
"Come on!" she said, her eyes wide and lit up with excited anticipation as she grabbed my hand and pulled me into the spa.
I was about to protest that I needed to get my bag, but the driver already had retrieved it and was following behind us, bag in hand.
Alice chippered at me the entire afternoon as we both got massages, manicures, pedicures, hair, make-up and several other things I wanted to protest to, but didn't. I knew it would be futile to argue, so I just did my best to enjoy my time with Alice and not get hung up on all the things I really didn't need.
After we were done at the spa, Alice took me to her studio. Even as a person who was fashion challenged, like I was, it was an impressive thing seeing all the remarkable creations she had designed that were on display; she was truly talented.
"Ready?" Alice asked beaming, looking like she was about to burst when we made it to the back of the place that contained large tables filled a variety of things like sketches, fabric and pencils.
"Ready for what?" I asked stupidly, feeling like I should know what she was referring to.
"To see the dress I made for you," she said like it should have been obvious. Admittedly, after she'd said it, I realized it should have been obvious. "I just did the finishing touches to it last night. I hope you like it."
"Alice, you really didn't need to do that," I began but she cut me off, rolling her eyes.
"You really are going to have to get used to people doing things for you," she admonished. "It's in the Cullen DNA. Besides, anyone who was able to crack through my brother's cynical view on relationships is more than worthy of anything I could ever do for her."
I was a bit confused by her statement, but my confusion was overridden by her affectionate words. I felt my face flush with warmth from my blush as a result, causing Alice's smile to radiate brighter than before. My eyes turned down and I bit my lip, embarrassed, though I wasn't exactly sure why.
"To be honest, I still don't understand why he even looked twice at me," I confessed. "Much less why he loves me."
"He's right; you really don't see yourself clearly, do you?" Alice said making me look back up at her dark brown eyes, seeing her shake her head with a small disbelieving smile. "We'll work on that," she added narrowing her eyes at me. "But first, the dress," she beamed again.
I couldn't help but giggle at the way her eyes lit up and sparkled with the mention of clothing.
"That's the spirit!" she cheered, clapping. And then she pulled back a curtain that divided the room, revealing a beautiful, deep blue colored dress that was so rich and bold, it looked silky, but yet wasn't overly dressy.
"Alice," I breathed, looking over at her and then back at the dress.
"Put it on," she prompted, shooing me toward the dress and then pulled the curtain between us.
I slipped the dress over my body, zipping it up my side, marveling in the feel of it. It fit like she'd had a mold of my body when she made it. I'd never felt so comfortable in a dress in all my life, not to mention how stunning it looked; it really was incredible.
"Well?" she prompted from the other side of the curtain.
"It's beautiful," I told her honestly.
Alice pulled the curtain aside and beamed when she looked at me.
"You like it?" she confirmed.
"I love it, it's perfect," I nodded earnestly, tears of gratitude welling in my eyes. I actually did love it.
Me. Loving a dress. That was new.
"Don't cry!" she said, grabbing a tissue and shoving it at me. "You'll ruin your make-up!"
I dabbed my eyes, realizing only after she'd said it that I was on the verge of crying and began laughing at myself for getting emotional, feeling stupid for crying over something so trifle. The thing was though; I was already an emotional mess from being away from Edward for a month and anything on top of that seemed to elicit quick tears.
"I can't believe you made this for me, Alice. It's… wow," I marveled looking back to the mirror feeling beautiful just being in it. The front cut straight across my chest and then angled in as it made its way up to my neck with short feminine cap sleeves. The dress hugged me as it trailed down my body and fell a few inches above the knee. The skirt of the dress had a slit a few inches long running up the front of my right thigh, hidden by a small ruffle that ran up the front, right side, peaking out only when I walked.
"I picked the color because I knew it would set off your light skin tone," she explained. "It looks even better on you than I imagined!" She smiled the same satisfied, glowing smile she gave me when I had on the red dress, looking like she was about to start clapping and jumping up and down. Then she added, "Though, it would have been hard to make something that didn't look fantastic on you," as if it was an obvious fact.
"Thank you, Alice," I murmured, blushing again with her words, biting back my kneejerk reaction to correct her; that plenty of things looked far less than fantastic on me. But the strange thing was, when I stared at my reflection, I could see the woman in the mirror I'd seen in glimpses at the Cullen house and in the pictures Alice gave me staring back at me now. I couldn't help but smile, realizing she was starting to become familiar; that she was becoming a little less of a stranger and a little more a part of me.
I smiled at my reflection despite myself.
"Here," Alice said handing me a pair of heels.
I slipped them on, not even wanting to know how much they'd cost, and surveyed the whole look.
"Perfect," she said satisfied. "Okay. So tonight," Alice instructed as she fiddled with the dress and looked at my reflection with me, "there will be a lot of cameras, a lot of noise and a lot of questions. It's completely chaotic; especially since you'll be next to Edward the whole time because they're all going to be trying to get his attention. Try not to get overwhelmed, Edward will help you navigate through it," she assured me. I nodded and took a deep breath, already feeling overwhelmed, despite her assurances, trying to keep me from feeling that way. "The media that are there will likely ask you some questions too because of showing up with him and the recent confirmation that you're together. Answer only what you're comfortable with. Short, concise answers are all you need to give them. Simply just smile and look away if you don't want to give one—it sounds rude, but it's really the best way to handle it because if you say anything about not wanting to answer a question, no matter what you say or how you say it, they'll find a way to spin it into a scandal. Edward will help steer the person to another question or move on. The questions they ask you will likely revolve around your relationship, but they'll also almost certainly ask you what you're wearing, just tell them you're wearing 'a one of a kind Mary Alice'."
I looked at her confused.
"Mary Alice is my actual name, but more importantly, my designer name," she giggled at the fact I didn't know that.
"What is it with your family and going by different names?" I pondered aloud.
"It's our way of being dark and mysterious," Alice said dipping her voice deeper for effect and the laughed at her own joke. "Oh and one more thing; don't forget to call Edward 'Anthony' when you're not alone."
"Right," I said nodding, a bit overwhelmed by all the information she'd just unloaded on me
"Don't worry. You'll do great," she assured me.
XXXX
The limo arrived to pick me up from Alice's studio a short time later; a larger one this time with windows so dark, they looked as black as the body of the car. It was to pick up Edward after me and then head to the Premiere. I thanked Alice again as she gave me one last hug before I hurried out to the limo. I nearly fell—catching my shoe on the lip of the doorway in my haste to see Edward because the faster I got in that limo, the faster the driver could take me to him—but was able to recover preventing the ruin of Alice's dress and my becoming a bloody mess.
I mumbled a thank you to the driver when he took my suitcase and opened the door for me.
"It sure is good to see you, beautiful," Edward's velvety voice greeted me as I slid into the seat.
"Edward!" I exclaimed in surprise and launched myself at him. I took a deep breath of his honey and sunshine scent, relishing in the trill of electricity that came from his touch, humming in contentment with the feel of his arms slipping around me, pulling me into him, swimming in the feel of his soft, full lips kissing mine and marveling at the delicious way he tasted.
An overpowering feeling washed over me that told me I was home. It was a feeling that answered why I had been struggling so much with being away from him since he'd left. I knew now, without a doubt, that I was exactly where I needed to be and that place was wherever Edward was. Everything aligned in my world and it was perfect and right again, the world settling back into its axis making me want to never leave that moment.
It didn't take long, though, until it wasn't enough just sitting next to him and I turned, sliding my legs astride him, my dress bunching up around my hips. His hands moved to my thighs, touching my exposed skin, sending a flash of warmth through me from his electric touch and settling deep into my core. I cried out in want as he slid his hands up my thighs to my hips bunching the dress up further as he grabbed them firmly.
"God, I've missed you," I murmured between kisses, humming in contentment as I slid my fingers through his soft, unruly hair.
"I missed you too, love. So much," Edward said and then pulled my hips forward roughly, bucking his hips, sending a thrill through my entire body as if showing me how much he missed me too.
Oh God I wanted him. I needed him.
My hands slid down over him, moving to unbutton his pants and pull down the zipper. I held myself up while he pulled out a condom, and shoved his pants and underwear down, out of the way, but not surrendering his lips.
When he got it in place, he trailed his fingers along the side of my underwear, drawing them to the side, exposing me and slipped a finger inside me, soliciting a moan to escape my lips. I was so wired, just that nearly threw me over; realizing how close I was, he didn't surrender his hand. Instead, he slipped in another finger, making me cry out again, and massaged me expertly with his thumb and fingers until I came. I was still coming down when he slid his hand out of the way and pushed himself into me.
He let out a moan matching my cry of pleasure and relief I felt when we connected, and we both took a couple of deep, almost ragged breaths.
"I'm not going to be able to last long," he warned; his voice dark with desire, "especially not after watching that."
I kissed him fervently, our tongues moving together in tandem, and began rocking my hips, making him groan in pleasure at the feeling.
"I don't care," I breathed, because I didn't. "I just need you." It was nothing short of the truth, I needed him, needed this, no matter how long it lasted. Besides, he felt so good, I knew I wasn't going to last long either. I could feel it; I was almost there again. My body soaked up the feel of him; vibrated with my want.
I moved faster, chasing the high I sought.
Oh God.
Almost there.
It feels so—
"Mr. Cullen," a man's voice came through the speakers.
I stopped mid movement in surprise, looking around in panic as Edward let out a growl of a groan in frustration and threw his head back against the headrest of his seat, pinching the bridge of his nose. I didn't think to check if anyone could see or hear us or even thought of the fact that someone else could have been in the car with us. I wouldn't have realized it if there had been; my thoughts had been singularly on Edward and nothing else.
"We're approaching the venue," the man's voice continued.
Edward pulled his hands over his face, rubbing it, letting out another growl of frustration and then looked up at me with a sigh. He smiled softly and shook his head as if reading my thoughts of panic, but I looked around again anyway, noting that the partition was up between the driver and us. I looked out the windows to the darkening city outside, reminding myself that I hadn't been able to see inside to know Edward was in here, so no one could likely see us now.
"We're right on schedule and will be there in less than five minutes," he finished.
I dropped my forehead on Edward's shoulder in defeat that we'd have to finish this later, trying my best not to let out a whine of protest and worked on calming my breathing.
"I need a few minutes. Go past and back around," Edward instructed after pressing a button next to him and then released it.
"Yes sir," the driver called back through the speakers without question or implication in his voice.
Chagrin flooded me, realizing, despite the neutral tone of his voice, the driver probably knew exactly what we were up to back here and I felt my cheeks light on fire.
Edward grasped my hips, giving them a push and pull, making my breathing come in short gasps with the feeling that the movement sent through me. I pulled my head off his shoulder, to look at him. His green eyes were playfully dark colored by both want and love. He pulled his hands from my hips and slid them on either side of my face, pulling me in for a kiss.
If distraction was his tactic, it worked, because all it took was about two seconds for the world and all my worries to disappear, leaving only Edward and me. It was just us was all that existed again and all that mattered.
"I love you," I whispered, pressing my forehead to his as I began moving my hips again, unable to keep them still; helpless against the feeling of him in me.
"I love you too, Bella," he murmured softly trailing his thumb along my cheekbone and pulled me in for another kiss, a kiss that began as sweet and gentle and quickly deepened turning almost desperate with need as I rocked my body.
Just like that, I was close again.
Closer.
Oh God.
"Please," I heard myself plea breathlessly.
I felt myself begin to move faster as the feeling intensified.
Oh God, it felt so good.
Even faster; chasing again.
My breathing became heavier.
Oh God. Almost there.
Edward called out, going over. The sound of him coming was all it took to pull me over with him, crying out in loud moans over his now all too aware at just how loud I was but not finding it in me to care one bit if anyone heard me.
When we came down, I collapsed against his chest, both of us breathing heavily, catching our breath from the swell of sensation.
Edward let out a hum of contentment as he wrapped his arms around me lovingly, my cheek resting on his shoulder. I didn't want him to ever let go.
After a few minutes, the driver's voice interrupted our blissful moment, letting us know we were again approaching the venue. This time, Edward pressed the button again replying with a simple, "thank you."
Edward kissed my hair before I reluctantly pulled myself off him, hearing an involuntary whine of protest escape my lips with the feel of him leaving me.
Edward chuckled softly and leaned over kissing my forehead as I pulled the dress back down over my hips. Then he took off the condom, looking a bit panicked, unable to figure out what to do with it, obviously he'd not thought that far ahead.
I quickly offered the small zippered pocket inside the small clutch purse Alice had given me to go with the dress, hoping it wasn't something I was supposed to give back to her, thinking about how awkward it would be for me to do so now. He quickly tied off the condom and I wrapped it in a tissue stowing it away; I laughed to myself feeling like I was keeping it for a memento or something.
"Thanks," he said giving me a kiss and finished re-dressing himself; making me realize I should make sure I looked okay. From what I could tell, looking down at myself, I was fine, though my knees were red. I hoped they'd fade enough by the time we exited the car; I didn't want to make my first official appearance with Edward looking disheveled like I was just his bed buddy. The freshly fucked look was not what I was supposed to be sporting on the red carpet.
I searched my clutch for a compact mirror in the sea of beauty items Alice had left in there to make sure our tryst wasn't evident anywhere else.
First loving a dress, now fretting over make-up; I'm turning into such a girl. I thought laughing at myself.
"You look beautiful," Edward said, seeing me pull out the mirror.
I flashed him a small smile but looked anyway to be sure. My lips were a little red and swollen and my cheeks flushed, but other than that, there wasn't any tell-tale sign of our tryst. I reapplied my Alice supplied lip gloss and checked my hair; it was as good as it was going to get.
I let out a sigh of relief and stuffed the compact back in the clutch.
The car turned and slowed to a crawl. Edward glanced out the window and then back at me.
I looked back down at my knees; still red. I groaned and made a face, feeling my cheeks warm as I rubbed them, though I didn't know why I thought that would help make them look less red.
Edward chuckled.
I looked over at him and into his eyes, feeling panic stricken about the red marks from the stupid leather seat, my pale skin wasn't helping mask the color.
"Don't worry about it, love," he smiled pulling his fingers over my heated cheek.
But then I had an idea. I pulled out some of the make-up from the clutch purse and touched a little onto my knees to mask the redness until it faded, earning another chuckle from Edward, but I didn't care. I felt slight ease in my worry now that they at least weren't as noticeable.
The car came to a stop. Edward took my hand, rubbing it soothingly with his thumb as he looked into my eyes. "You ready?"
"Absolutely."
Edward laughed, readily catching my lie and then his face turned serious and reassuring.
"You'll do fine," he assured me. "Irina is waiting for us. She'll stay next to you the entire time."
"What about you?" I asked him confused.
"Well, I'll be next to you as much as I can, but I'm guessing you're not going to want to be right next to me for some of the things, so she'll stand with you during those times. Not that I'll be far."
"Like what things?" I asked, unable to think of anything that would make me not want to be next to Edward.
"Well," he said, "I might be asked to step onto an area for a live broadcasted interview, and knowing you, I'm guessing you would rather bow out of something like that. But I was thinking more about when I interact with the crowd of people; sign autographs, take pictures." He took in my blank expression and then continued. "Remember that night in New York when we had to walk through the paparazzi to get out of the restaurant and to the car?"
I nodded.
"Add in screams and multiply that by about, oh, a thousand."
Oh. I could feel my eyes widen and my stomach turn uneasily, realizing he was right; I wouldn't want to deal with that.
"It's loud and overwhelming, even for me still and I've had enough time that I should be used to it, but I'm not. So I figured you'll probably rather hang back for that."
I nodded, understanding. I definitely wanted to stay away from that.
The car moved forward a ways and then stopped again. I heard the driver's door slam shut and then saw him stand waiting outside the door, facing away from it.
"You really do look beautiful," he said eyeing me appreciatively. "It looks like I owe Alice another thank you—that dress looks incredibly sexy on you."
I blushed.
"You don't look so bad yourself," I flirted, unable to help but eye him wantonly. Edward in a dark, blue suit with an open-necked crisp white dress shirt was indescribable.
God, I wanted him all over again right then.
"Insatiable," Edward scolded with a playful smirk, instantly catching the path my mind had jumped on as he pulled my bottom lip from my teeth—something I hadn't realized I was doing.
"Your fault," I retorted feeling more than just my cheeks growing warmer.
"Right," Edward said breathing a laugh that made his green eyes dance with a mixture of amusement and want, making me squirm; anxious for us to be alone again.
Then he raised his hand and knocked on the glass window twice. In response, the driver turned and opened the door.
The moment the door was opened, a flood of noise greeted my ears. Noise comprised of hundreds if not thousands of people screaming; some names, some just trills of excitement.
Edward stepped out of the car and I heard a spike of cheers and screams from those who could see him exit the limo. He turned back to me, offering his hand to help me out of the car. He could tell that I was nervous. I was fidgeting and probably looked like I was going to throw up because I knew felt like I was.
"Breathe, Bella," he told me in my ear as he brought me close to his side.
I nodded and he hooked my arm in his, smiling at me that same secret smile he had given me in my favorite picture sitting on my desk at home. The same smile that told me he loved me without having to say the words.
I felt my body thrill with warmth as I felt myself smile that same smile back at him. Then Edward began walking, making me look away from him and around. We were walking on a sea of red carpet and there were bright lights everywhere amongst masses of people fenced off. Those who could see Edward were still screaming loudly, trying desperately to get his attention. Around us, in the open area we were in, I could see several people in especially bright areas with microphones doing interviews or talking to cameras. And there were people drifting about everywhere, looking like they were working, corralling stars, guiding people, security standing on this side of the barricades looking foreboding; each seeming to be on their own particular mission.
"Alright 'Anthony' Cullen," I heard a woman's voice say.
I looked away from the commotion and saw a beautiful blonde woman walking towards us smiling. I fought a grimace at how striking she was—reminding me that this was the kind of woman that surrounded Edward all the time.
"You must be Bella," she ascertained, extending her hand when we approached one another.
I took it, forcing a smile, trying to fight the irrational ribbon of jealousy of this woman knowing Edward and managed to smile as Edward slipped his hand securely around my waist.
"I'm Irina. I've heard a lot about you," she said throwing Edward a teasing wink.
"Nice to meet you," I mumbled taking in the blue-eyed, light-blonde haired woman before me. She had a beautiful, slightly rounded Nordic-looking face and appeared to be a little shorter than I was, though it was hard to tell true height when I was wearing heels. I couldn't really get an idea of her age, she looked younger than me, but I felt like the roundness to her face made her appearance of youthfulness deceptive.
"Irina tells stories," Edward said, running his hand through his hair.
"Strictly non-fiction," she insisted.
I wasn't sure why, but felt myself I blush.
"Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining," she continued, addressing me. "You'd never know this man is the same as the sullen creature I worked for before he'd met you." Then she flashed Edward a look, daring him to dispute it.
Edward just laughed and raked his hand through his hair again.
Catching his nervous cue, I studied him curiously. If I didn't know better, I'd swear he was blushing. I smiled, touching my hand to his cheek.
"Alright, dear 'Anthony'," Irina said as if quotes around his actor name was like an inside joke—which, I guess it was. "The natives are getting restless," she laughed putting her hand on his bicep as I tried to ignore the irrational urge to rip her hand off of him and tell her he's mine and she should keep her hands off.
Great. Did I have a Possessive Bitch Bella living in my head too?
Sigh. There were too many of them already, I didn't need any more.
"We'd better get you out there before they begin to riot," Irina continued.
Edward rolled his eyes and shook his head.
"You darling, will stick with me," she said to me. "We get to stand safely back and watch the cannibals devour him and spit him back out—it's quite entertaining." She laughed as she led the way towards the crowd.
I laughed and felt myself hope Possessive Bitch Bella backed off, especially with Irina, because I realized I kind of liked her.
Edward took back ownership of my hand, kissed my temple and told me he loved me.
"I love you too, baby," I told him back, turning my face to his, rising up to my tiptoes and giving him a chaste kiss on the lips. I wasn't sure if I was imagining it, but I thought I could vaguely hear cameras clicking in the background. I realized then that it was a real possibility and felt my cheeks instantly warm.
Edward cocked an eyebrow as I rolled back on my heels, catching the new term of endearment I'd used. I watched his sexy crooked smile cross his face, making me bite my lip in want.
Then, though seeming reluctant to look away from me, he moved to follow Irina keeping a firm hold of my hand as we made our way toward the loud screams that grew louder as Edward approached and more people caught sight of him. It was quickly so loud that it wasn't long before I was wishing for a pair of earplugs.
As we moved from the drop-off area we came from to the official Red Carpet, I was mesmerized by the sight unfolding in front of me, like it was its own little world. Cameras flashed in rapid fire at Edward. Screams erupted. Countless people were yelling and screaming for Anthony. I couldn't find a way to think around the noise and commotion.
I suddenly felt dizzy.
Edward's grip on my hand tightened slightly and then he began rubbing the back of it with his thumb, bringing me back to earth, grounding me, allowing my body to remember how to breathe. When I did, the light breeze happened to be in my favor, because I was greeted with my favorite honey and sunshine smell that had an edge of crispness to it that came with being outside. I could feel my body calm from my anxiety with the smell of him, but also excite with want, which I found just as distracting, but a feeling I was becoming blissfully familiar with.
Edward went from one interview to another, each always asking or affirming it was true that I was the lucky one who had taken 'Anthony' off the market. Edward always answered a seemingly proud, resounding "yes" and looked at me like he couldn't quite believe he was so lucky.
No baby, I'm lucky.
As Alice had predicted, I was asked what I was wearing several times. The first time, I was so nervous, I nearly forgot what Alice had said, but managed to meekly say "a Mary Alice Original" into the microphone held out to me, realizing belatedly I said it wrong. The interviewer laughed and told me that I was going to have to break out of my shell if I was going to be with Anthony Cullen. I smiled politely with fiery cheeks but wondered if that were possible for me to become accustomed to this.
After several interviews, I did go stand back by the wall with Irina while Edward signed autographs and smiled for countless pictures with extremely excited fans. I marveled at how different he was in front of a camera, in front of a crowd. He seemed so charismatic and at ease, like he wasn't fazed at all by any of it. Actually, he looked like he was enjoying it. I couldn't help but chuckle when I realized he acted just like Emmett, seeming to soak up the attention, loving every minute of it.
If I didn't know him better, I would have believed his façade, but I could see his nervous "tells" that gave him away. I watched him as he constantly ran his hands through his hair; I knew he did it because he was uncomfortable and nervous, but to the screaming fans that ate it up, swooning over it, it seemed like they thought it was something he did specifically to drive them crazy. I noticed when he was stopped to answer questions he'd shove his hands in his pockets; something I knew was also a sign of nerves. And I watched as he smiled and joked with people, but every once and awhile I could see his mask crack for the briefest of moments and I could see the look on his face that told me this was all overwhelming to him and as much out of his comfort zone as I knew it to be. Watching him like this, made me want to go to him and try to put him at ease, but I knew it wouldn't help, he needed to stay in his character, he needed to show his appreciation, because he did appreciate it all; he just didn't swim blissfully in the attention.
I stood there next to Irina, mesmerized by the unbelievably sexy creature in front of me, amazed by him, how he moved, his expressions, mannerisms, and how well he could pull off the role he needed to play. But even more, I loved the fact that I could watch and pick out the moments that broke through the character he was portraying and knowing that I was possibly the only person who saw it.
"Hey there Spinner!"
I jumped from being jarred out the trance Edward had me in just as a couple of strong arms swept around me.
"Rumor had it you were going to be here," Emmett said to me. "Hey 'Rina," he called over to Irina. I heard her laugh, probably from seeing me swim in Emmett's massive arms as she returned the greeting.
Emmett released me and flashed me one of his contagious smiles. I felt a smile spread on my face in return. I really liked Emmett.
"Hi Emmett, it's good to see you," I told him honestly finding myself hoping that Rose changed her mind and did end up giving him a chance.
"How's he doing?" He asked, jerking his thumb toward Edward.
"He's doing well, I think," I told him as I looked back at Edward, hearing several screaming calls for Emmett's attention. "Though I'm seeing his nervous mannerisms more and more the longer he's been entertaining them. I'm beginning to wonder if he's going to find a hand-full of hair in his fist each time he runs his hand through it at this point, so I'm guessing he's pretty close to his limit."
After a beat, I looked away from Edward and over to Emmett with a lack of reply finding he was looking down at me with an expression that almost looked puzzled, but not quite. Impressed? Confused? Maybe. I wasn't sure; but that probably was in part to do with the fact that I wasn't sure what I'd said to evoke such a look.
"What?" I asked him, finally, giving up on my guessing.
A smile began to spread across his unnamed expression and he shook his head.
"He better hang onto you, spinner girl," was all he replied and stooped down, giving me a kiss on the cheek and left my side, heading into the building, leaving me just as answerless as I was before.
XXXXX
The movie, like Edward had indicated on The Late Show, was intense. I enjoyed it at first, it seemed to be a really good movie. But it didn't take too long until I had a hard time watching it—and it wasn't just the fact I was sitting next to Edward in a dark room with his hand on my bare thigh, causing a surge in my need for him. The movie was primarily about his character's volatile relationship with the lead female character, named Maria, who was played by Tanya Denali. Watching the volatile side of their relationship wasn't a problem, the problem I had was watching the flipside of that volatility that spun into a provocative sexual chemistry between the characters and watching them as they lusted, kissed and groped one another.
I never expected myself to react this way. I never once imagined that the characters I watched on TV sitcoms or in movies were actually anything like their real self, they were characters I was watching, that was it. But for whatever reason—despite still knowing it was all staged, scripted and played out for the movie—I couldn't handle watching this.
Logically I knew it wasn't real and it was all acting; that I was watching Edward playing a guy named Will and it was that character I saw on screen. But I couldn't kick the nauseating knot that formed in my gut because my mind couldn't seem to let go of the important fact that it wasn't 'Edward' on the screen. It was like my brain refused to acknowledge it wasn't him, that I wasn't watching a recording of Edward kissing Tanya, of him touching her, of him screwing her. Instead, it felt like I was being force to watch an old sex tape of my boyfriend with his former lover. Of course it didn't help that I knew Edward had dated Tanya.
I had been doing relatively fine until Will grabbed Maria, pinning her to the wall as she breathed heavily. Want filling the entire screen, seeping out, spilling into the room.
My stomach turned restlessly.
E—Will kissed Maria roughly, saying an angry, lust riddled line or two, into her ear and she retorted one of her own.
My stomach knotted.
Edw—. No. Not Edward. Will. Will hastily undid his pants and shoved Tanya's skirt up hungrily, grabbing her, showing she wasn't wearing anything beneath.
The room began to spin.
Edward picked her up, pinning her between the wall and himself. Then he thrust himself against Tanya roughly, making her call out in pleasure.
It literally felt like I'd just watched him actually bury himself inside her.
Oh God. My stomach flipped and squeezed and I gagged, barely swallowing back the heave.
I couldn't breathe. My vision blurred feeling a cold sweat flash across my skin.
I clenched my jaw, keeping my hand in front of my mouth and stood up abruptly from my seat, unable to make up an excuse to Edward as he looked up at me questionably, because I knew if I opened my mouth, it wasn't going to be words that came out. So I quickly made my way to the door, out of the theater as casually as possible—knowing I didn't succeed—and desperately sought a restroom as a stream of irrational tears began falling down my face.
The moment I passed the bathroom door, I couldn't hold back any longer, barely making it to the toilet as my body forcefully expelled the contents of my stomach.
Some of those sex scenes in movies are pretty realistic looking. Poor Bella. :(
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