Drunken kiss
You and I
We don't wanna be like them
We can make it till the end
Nothing can come between, you and I
Not even the gods above
Can separate the two of us
No nothing can come between you and I
Oh, you and I
- One direction
Dear Riley,
It's Maya. I know it must be weird to see me, Maya Penelope Hart writing a letter. To you, especially. Since I've always found it easy to talk to you. You're the one person I never had to pretend to. No filter. Except for when I was stepping back or putting you first. You're my safe space Riley, so if there's someone I want to talk to about what's going on in my wrecked life, it's supposed to be you. But I can't talk to you about this. Not when it's about you. Hence, the letter. You're never going to read this, but at least it's a way to get things off my chest. Huh, I guess that's why people write in diaries. But not me. Even when I can't talk to you, I'm going to talk to you. Because I love you.
There I said it. Well, I wrote it anyway. I love you. I'm in love with you and you are the one person I can't imagine my life without. But I'm not that one person for you anymore. I guess I could have told you this before. But I didn't know it then. I didn't know till you were standing there in the altar with him. You know the worst part, I helped him do it. I set you guys up, I helped him pop the question, not that he hadn't done that before. I expected to see you happy with the man you love. And I was happy. Until I realized that I wanted to be the one up there with you. Obviously, I was up there as your best woman cause if Farkle got a best man, you got a best woman right. But I didn't want to wish you guys a happy ever after. I didn't know that I wanted to be your happy ever after. Until I did.
But then it was too late. I lost you. Like Shawn lost Cory. Thirteen years, Riley. Thirteen years he had to go without seeing your dad. Do you know how much that killed him? The one person in the world for him was the one person he could never have. I don't want that to be us Riley. I don't want you to move away from me and have kids and make me their godmother because that's not enough okay? You're mine. I know I sound crazed, but it'll blow over soon enough. We're best friends. We were yesterday. We are today, And I know that we will be tomorrow. You know why? Because Farkle's ring has been on your finger for a while now, but mine was there first. And it hasn't come off from the day I put it there till today. And your ring will grace my finger forever. Because that's us. We are beyond this earth. This universe. You are my universe.
And you better remember that. Farkle knows it. He's as much my brother, as your husband, as our best friend. And he'd never come between us. Because he knows. That we are for each other. And we are forever. I guess on some level I've always known that it would come to the two of us. Sure we got Farkle, Lucas and Zay but it's Riley and Maya. Maya and Riley. Best Friends forever. I didn't understand what I was feeling before, but now I do. I love you. And I know you love me too. And don't ever leave me Riles. I've just begun making my mark in the world.
Remember when you and I both thought we had feelings for Lucas and we didn't understand anything? We were never actually thinking about him. We were thinking about each other. We always think about each other. And even though Lucas and I have got a thing going on now and I respect and admire and yes, maybe even love him now, that doesn't change what I feel for you. As I said we go beyond this wretched life.
You're not my soulmate honey. You are my soul.
I don't have to be with you, as anything more than a best friend. I'm content with that. Because I know that no matter who intervenes, I'm the number one person in your life, just like you are in mine. I've never felt insecure around you Riles. Because you've always been there. Even when you had no reason to. It's you and me. And I love us.
I'm being really blunt aren't I. It just feels so good to finally be honest with myself. About you. I'm not judging me. You never have. Who else should I be afraid of?
And Riley, that night, I know what I told you. I sort of willed myself to believe it too. But it's not true. It wasn't just a drunken kiss. It never was. I know we partied too long and that you probably don't remember, but I do. That's when I realized. Yeah, It wasn't just a drunken kiss. It was so much more than that.
Always,
Your peaches.
Hey ya'll ! I became a GMW/BMW addict and the dynamic killed me. I haven't watched the third season yet, but what I've seen do far is priceless. I used to ship Rucas, but then I became a Riarkle, and subsequently realized that the only person who even comes half as close to what Maya has to offer is Riley, so I kind of wrote this ramble after watching prisoner by Miley Cyrus and Dua Lipa.
Also the soulmate line was borrowed from This thing upon me by Zarry Documentaries on wattpad.
TPWK
Love, N.