Chapter 20: Meisuke and Riko and Bento
AN: Do you ever just have... MONTHS where you just want to do nothing but stare at the ceiling until 4 in the morning, wake up at 12, eat some *rating appropriate language* cereal and then *rating appropriate language* off back to bed until dinner? Like you can't muster the effort to do *rating appropriate language* all? Well, I've been 'went to the store for a pack of cigarettes' for a while, and while I can't say I have a GOOD reason to be gone, I just... couldn't. But I'm back now. I'm... home, I guess.
So, tadaima.
...
Patting her chest with a proud smirk, Riko declared, "Sorry, Miss Tohru, but you're 100 years too young to challenge me!"
The young woman spluttered for a moment before replying, "Y-you might be old, but you're still just a kid!"
"Who are you calling a kid, huh!?" She shouted back, "that's it! There's only way this can end now, and you know it!"
With a grim nod, Tohru replied, "Yep."
...
"...and that's why we need you to be judges for a food competition." Meisuke finished, pinching the bridge of her nose. "They've been staring daggers at each other across the room ever since, and if we don't resolve this soon it's gonna get bloody." With a sigh, she added, "...mostly from Tohru tripping over furniture."
Shouta and Makoto stood in the entryway of the Kobayashi home, Shouta clad in a Renaissance-era doublet with fine purple hose, silk shoes, and a jaunty hat finishing the set, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "A tournament, you say?" He enthused, bouncing from one foot to the other. "What merriment! I've not seen such worthy sport since the end of the great conquest of Castle Van'ya! You can be most assured in knowing that I will absolutely aid in this mighty endeavor!"
Nodding in far more reserved agreement, Makoto said, "Sure! I don't think Takeshi'll still be asleep for a while and this sounds pretty fun, so I don't mind!"
Finally breaking eye contact with Riko at this comment, Tohru turned to the tall dragon with her brow raised in curiosity, Tohru asked, "Wait, if he's still asleep but you're awake, then doesn't that mean you sleep at different times? How do you guys put up with something like that?"
With an amiable smile, Makoto replied, "No, not at all. I'm awake whenever he is."
"So, when do you sleep?" She asked curiously.
Makoto allowed himself a small chuckle before leaning down to Tohru's eye level, and for a brief moment his ordinary image of a calm, polite, and collected-even boring-young butler to disappear, replaced with a monster. His face was covered in a bleak shadow, his goatlike eyes glowing a dull red and his teeth jutting out of his maw, demonstrating just how sharp they truly were. Even his ordinarily cute horns seemed sinister, jutting from his head like a gnarled old tree by which the innocent were punished.
" R." He said, a jovial lilt to his voice.
...
Tohru sat quivering beside Riko, gripping the small dragon's arm as Shouta stood on the kitchen table, oblivious explaining the rules with arms raised to the heavens in a 'y' shape.
"A War of the Bentou this will be!" He declared. "The rounds will be three, pushing your culinary art to the most absolute of limits! The first, a side dish!" Crossing his arms with a firm gaze, the ancient dragon continued, "this must be something delightful but small, simple to consume and at no risk of ruining the kingdom."
Nodding in agreement, Makoto added, "We're really excited to see what you guys come up with! It's sure to be great fun, right, judge Meisuke?"
With a roll of her eyes at the elaborate display, the bespectacled butler asked, "When did this become a game show? Only old people watch those anymore ever since the internet started killing TV."
The pair of dragons gaped at Meisuke with identical scandalized looks. "How dare thee quoth such blasphemous heresy at our persons!?" Shouta reproached, physically recoiling at the comment. "Takeshi's Castle is the finest entertainment to be had! Merriment of such measure as to reinvigorate a full choir of bards at its mere mention! Game Shows are immortal!"
"Yeah, Meisuke," Makoto added, leaning across the table, "how could something like Jeopardy or Cash Cab lose relevance!? They're classics!"
Her only reply was to roll her eyes even harder.
...
Standing at the stove with her sleeves rolled up and hair pulled back, Meisuke psyched herself up for the challenge. Poor Riko doesn't know that I've been practicing my cooking ever since I burned down the kitchen! She thought, placing her chin in the crook of her hand with a smug expression. I don't work in a maid cafe for nothing!
Meanwhile the short dragoness in question rifled through the drawers and cabinets of the kitchen, searching through the drawers until she began to grin, reaching into an open closet to gather her prize.
...
"Cheese crackers!?" Tohru cried, completely nonplussed by the snack Riko had prepared. "I went all out! Look at this!" The young woman gestured to her own offering, a delightful and clearly thoughtfully prepared multi-layered sandwich stuffed full of three kinds of meat, two types of lettuce, and four different cheeses. A drizzle of two different sauces in addition to mayonnaise completed the dish. "This took me ages! And so much effort! There's no way these could even be in the same category!"
With a sad sigh, Meisuke said, "Well, you're right... these aren't in the same category."
Nodding in agreement, Makoto added, "It's regrettable, but... Riko wins this round."
Her mouth flapping silently, Tohru dropped down to her knees as the small dragoness celebrated, dancing in place and pumping her fist in the air. "See that, Miss Tohru!?" She said, a smary grin on her face. "I told you from the start this is what would happen!"
Shouta stood on his chair, placing his hands on the table with a somber frown. "Unfortunately, Miss Tohru, you were disqualified from this round on the grounds of making too much."
Makoto offered a sheepish smile as he said, "I'm sorry to say it, but it's true. A side dish isn't supposed to be the main course, Miss Kobayashi, but that's what you maid. Anyone who ate that sandwich would be happy, sure, but... well, they wouldn't touch their real meal. Sadly, we cannot accept this submission on technical grounds."
Tohru finally fell fully to the floor, her shoulders hunched in defeat.
Coughing awkwardly, Shouta said, "We must now move on to the second round. Prepare a main course worthy of a journey, fine on the tongue but hardy for the travels through inclimate climes and unguarded groves."
...
Meisuke took a moment to breathe, once more pinching her nose in consternation. "Riko," she asked, "are those onigiri?"
With a shake of her head and a disgusted expression, her face scrunched up as though the very notion were offensive, Riko replied, "No way! These are sushi!" Puffing up her chest with pride, she added, "The shape was pretty hard, but I got the hang of it in the end."
"Tohru wins," all three judges said simultaneously, prompting Riko to immediately start whining and fussing, waving her arms erratically at the judges.
Meanwhile the young woman in question looked away in embarrassment, hiding her octopus sausages behind her. She was worried that she'd lose this round after exhausting her creative energies in the first round, but it appeared those fears were unfounded.
...
Awkwardly readjusting in his chair, coughing awkwardly to dispel the gloomy atmosphere left by the previous round, Shouta concluded, "This tourney comes to its climactic finale, the contestants primed for the final fight to the finish. Prepare yourselves, for this is the desert round! Sortie, my challengers!"
Nodding in agreement, the pair turned to head off in search of ingredients.
Only for Riko to be stopped short with a hand on her head.
"Meisukeee!" The young dragoness complained, attempting to bat the butler's hand away. "What are you doing!?" With a gasp, she added, "You're covering for Miss Tohru, aren't you? I knew it! She DID seduce you with her body!"
Shaking her head at the outlandish accusation, Meisuke replied, "No, it's just..." With a sigh, she said, "Riko, why are you so wound up about this?"
Her nose scrunching up in confusion, Riko replied, "What are you talking about? I'm trying to beat Miss Tohru, obviously!"
The butler shook her head again, saying, "We both know that's not true. There shouldn't have been any reason for you to pick a fight over this. I mean, Miss Tohru works in a restaurant. It's not exactly five stars, but still. Meanwhile, you," she poked the smaller dragoness in the nose, "haven't even taken a home ec class before."
"She's right, y'know," Makoto piped up, saying, "I know you've always been a bit... scrappy... but this seems like overkill, doesn't it?"
For a moment Riko said nothing, but after a few moments she finally mumbled out a quiet response.
Meisuke raised an eyebrow at this, saying, "Sorry, didn't hear that, Riko?"
A blush beginning to take hold of her face, Riko repeated only a bit louder, "Because she's done all this for me... I wanted to show everyone I was growing up... that I could do more now..." Staring resolutely at the ground, she finished, "I'm gonna be a kid for ages to her... I want to do something you could've been proud of me for..."
Quietly pulling a can of beer out from her pocket as she considered Riko's response, she began to wonder if maybe the little dragoness was growing up faster than she realized.
Riko blinked, snapping her fingers as she appeared to have some kind of epiphany. "That's it!" she declared, "I've thought of a new recipe!" This announced, she rushed out of the room... leaving concerned expressions on the faces of those she left behind.
...
"I'm baaack~!" Tohru trilled as she marched into the apartment with a small plastic bag swinging from her arm. "They were running a sale on chocolate bamboo shoots at the store, so I got a bunch!" Glancing around at the room, she asked, "is Riko still out?"
"Yup." Meisuke replied, "she made some Final Fantasy reference and then ran off."
Tohru's expression took on an intense edge of concern as she asked, "Will she be okay?"
With a small chuckle, Makoto replied, "Honestly she poses more threat to the people of this world than anyone does to her. Though I'm kind of surprised you're being such a mother hen to her."
Wavering for a moment, the young woman finally replied, "Well, I mean, she's a dragon, but.. she's still a kid, y'know?"
At this Shouta blinked in surprise, saying, "Even so, you still are but a babe compared to her. How say you as anything but a childe?"
Tohru stuck her tongue out at the ancient dragon. "I might seem young to you, but I'll have you know I'm just as much an adult as anyone here... and sometimes, Riko needs some adult supervision!" After a moment, she added, "Even if I'm not always the best adult for the job."
"I have arrived! Shower me with-" A resounding crash announced the return of the youngest dragoness far more effectively than her words ever could.
"Speaking of adult supervision..." Meisuke muttered.
...
Tohru poked at a bottle shaped like one would expect a sports drink to come in, but rather than the largely inert sugary beverage typically expected in such a container it bubbled and frothed like a boiling pot, a dark liquid swishing within. "So..." she began, "what is it?"
A proud smirk on her face, Riko leaned in conspiratorially with a small shake of the bottle as she said, "It's just the best thing ever! Pretty hard to get right, but I'm pretty sure I did it-"
Before she could finish her sentence, however, she found the bottle vanished from her hand, punted through the nearest window by Meisuke as the butler pushed Tohru and Riko to the ground and joining them on the floor. Shouta and Makoto followed suit, hiding beneath the table as threw their hands over their heads. For a moment all was silence until it was broken by an earsplitting crack of an explosion, a bright light the size of a baseball field was visible over the city.
No one said anything for a moment until Tohru finally screeched, "WHAT WAS THAT!?"
The dragons all coughed awkwardly, pointedly looking away until Riko finally explained, "Um, well... I kinda thought that I could make something Meisuke would like with magic... but Alchemy's something only Wizards do, and I thought I could replace a couple ingredients I didn't have, and..." with a sheepish grin and shrug, she concluded, "it didn't work?"
"So, yeah, you're disqualified," Meisuke said, lightly chopping the smaller dragon's head and eliciting a small squeal of protest.
...
"2 for 1, today only, huh?" Meisuke muttered.
Kneeling in the liquor aisle of her local convenience store, the butler considered the sale they were running on beer. While it was true that she could just conjure some, alcohol summoned by magic always had a weird metallic aftertaste-even cheap booze was better, but summoned beer was better than nothing.
Her attention thus occupied by her mental calculations, she rose to her feet and carelessly leaned back, bumping into another customer who was passing by as she did. Thus shook from her reverie, Meisuke said, "Oops, sorry for- wait, Joui?"
The uptight woman in question flinched at her name, stepping back and stammering. Instead of her maid clothing or the fastidious, meticulously selected clothing the butler would've expected of her, Joui was dressed in a loose-fitting, well-worn black t-shirt promoting some orchestra or another, a pair of old sweatpants, and a ragged pair of flip-flops. She began to shift from foot to foot, allowing her dark hair to drape across her face as a blush began to color her expression.
"I-I don't know who you're talking about!" The young woman replied with an awkwardly high-pitched falsetto, turning away to stare at one of the shelves and giving Meisuke a peek at her reddening cheeks.
Allowing her gaze to drift to travel downwards, Meisuke took note of the contents of the part-time maid's basket. She blinked in surprise, noting that her basket was filled with instant meals and junk foods. "Huh," the butler said, "I didn't figure you for the instant meals time. I thought you'd be more of the home ec class president ty-"
She stopped short, however, noticing Joui begin to pout and tear up just a bit.
"It's not my fault..." the young woman muttered, "I'm always exhausted when I get back from work and don't really have time to cook..." She rubbed her neck, training her gaze on the ground as she added, "Plus, I'm kinda... clumsy..."
Huh, Meisuke thought, She's more like Tohru than I realized. Huh, she grimaced, when put like that, it makes me feel kinda responsible. With a sigh she scratched her cheek, saying, "Well, maybe I could help you with that..."
***End of Chapter 20***