Chapter 21: Meisuke and Joui

A/N: For once a legitimate excuse (note to self: strikethru that later, then delete this note) reason for posting late! My computer was having trouble accessing for some reason, so I couldn't post anything until it sorted itself out.

...

The convenience store's doors chimed softly as they automatically swung open, announcing the odd pair's departure.

"Um... Miss Meisuke?" Joui began, faltering a bit, "What did you mean by 'help me with that'?"

Seeming to ignore the question entirely, Meisuke instead asked, "Where do you live?"

For a moment the young woman said nothing, fiddling uncertainly with the hem of her faded t-shirt before eventually saying, "I-it's this way..."

Meisuke gave her a nod of understanding and silently followed her.

...

"W-well, this is my home..." The young woman said, cringing slightly as she added, "Sorry it's not much to look at."

Trailing after Joui curiously, Meisuke took a moment to survey her small apartment. She hadn't lied-empty containers of instant food littered the room, laundry was strewn about the cramped living space with little if any thought put into where they were placed, and a film of dust and neglect clung to the walls. The butler was forcibly reminded yet again of how Tohru was when she had first met her.

She shook her head to banish those nagging thoughts and instead focused on the problem in front of her. I should probably start on the laundry and then move on to wiping the place down. She thought. No... I don't think she can do much cooking on her own, so I'll have to start that...

For a moment she considered how to best negotiate the restoration of the apartment alongside the preparations for dinner until she paused. Actually, she considered, come to think of it, doesn't Joui work in a maid cafe...?

...

"Are you good here?"

Joui offered a small, not entirely confident nod before turning to the cutting board before her and beginning to slice into the daikon she'd placed upon it.

Getting even this far had taken considerable effort; the kitchen was no cleaner than the rest of the apartment, and the thick carpet of dust on every surface suggested that the only time its owner had ever entered it was to use the microwave and grab a pair of disposable chopsticks. It probably hadn't been cleaned in...

With a small shudder, Meisuke decided not to dwell on how long it'd been.

Nevertheless, a quick scrub rendered the room mostly clean, and after setting Joui on some of the basic preparatory tasks for dinner, the butler turned her ministrations on the apartment at large. She had to admit, despite her domineering personality the young woman took directions well and had some basic cooking skill. I guess she'd kind of have to, the butler mused, otherwise she'd have gotten fired from her position a long time ago.

Her brow furrowed in contemplation.

Actually... why did she start working at that maid cafe? She thought. Now that I think about it, Joui seems pretty strait-laced and studious, especially considering what Tohru said... why would someone like that get a dead-end job at a maid cafe when they could've gone to college or done something... I don't know, better?

Deciding to get to the bottom of this, Meisuke poked her head in the kitchen and said, "Hey, Joui?"

The young woman glanced up from her cutting board with a smile and said, "Yes, Miss Meisuke?"

With a small scratch at her chin the butler asked, "Y'know, I have to wonder... why do you work at that maid cafe, anyway? You seem pretty smart. Why didn't you, I don't know, go to college or something better?"

For a moment Joui froze before finally relaxing as she said, "W-well... what's wrong with a maid cafe? I-it's fun, isn't it?"

"Uh huh." Meisuke deadpanned.

Another moment of silence passed before the young woman sighed, saying, "No sell, huh? I guess I'm not a very good liar."

The butler said nothing, waiting patiently for her explanation.

Finally, Joui began, saying, "Back when we were in high school, Tohru always talked about her big dreams for the future and sure, they were over the top brags, but... I really admired her for them, you know? Here she was dreaming big and out there while I stood with my feet on the ground and my eyes on my feet." She paused to sigh before continuing, "I wanted to be a part of something like that... and maybe that's why I became friends with her in the first place. All throughout our school years I followed her like a puppy and tried to push her towards her dreams, but I always felt kind of like I was nagging her. Eventually I followed her to college, and we were there for a while, but..." She started to cut again, saying, "I guess she decided it was time to start following her dreams. She dropped out, and with her gone... nothing really felt like it was worth it anymore. I'd just sort of drifted after her, and now that she was gone, there didn't seem much point anymore. Pretty soon my grades started to drop, and before the semester was over so did I. After leaving I tried to track her down and found Meisuke working at that maid cafe. Not really sure what to do anymore, I applied there and started working soon after finding out. I used to tell myself it was because I was watching over her, but now..."

With a sigh she finished, "in truth I think I just wouldn't know what to do if I wasn't following Tohru."

Meisuke sat silent, contemplating Joui's words before finally replying, "Well... that's fine, isn't it?"

"Huh?" the young woman replied, her brow furrowing in confusion.

"Well," Meisuke began, filling a pot with water before setting it on the stove, "you seem hung up on this 'dream' stuff, but it kind of sounds like you already have one. I mean, you've followed Tohru this far, even if it cost you this much already, and... well, maybe you could take better care of yourself, but this life isn't so bad, right? Really, what I'm trying to say is, following Tohru seems to be your dream, and you've held fast to it so far. I'd say you should be proud of yourself, even if it's just a little."

Knocked dumb at this, Joui considered the butler's words for a moment before she finally began to nod slowly. "Yeah..." she muttered unsurely, "yeah, I think you're right."

...

"Cooking classes are on Wednesdays at 7, right?" Joui asked, a bright smile as she opened the door to her apartment.

"Yep." Meisuke replied, stepping through and into the cool evening air with a small grin of her own. "I've been taking them for a bit now-I don't really need them, but they're kind of fun-and it'll be nice to have some company while I'm there. Just make sure to work that out with your job."

Nodding in agreement, Joui replied, "of course! See you then!"

However, a third figure took notice from a distance off, and anyone nearby would hear a young blonde woman mutter under her breath, "That damn Joui..."

...

Kobayashi Tohru hadn't left the house that evening with any ill-intent; she and Riko had simply decided some time after Meisuke had left to buy some alcohol from the nearby convenience store that they wanted ice cream, and Tohru decided to use this as an excuse to spend time with Meisuke instead of just calling her. It did concern her just slightly that Meisuke'd been out for so long, but Tohru trusted the butler implicitly and assured herself that no matter what Meisuke could take care of herself.

She began to waver in this conviction when the butler wasn't in the convenience store.

It hadn't taken Tohru long to learn what had happened to her butler, however, as she quickly took a look around the neighborhood and saw, not far from the convenience store, a familiar figure clad in a suit leaving an apartment with the door held open by another familiar face clad in frumpy clothing.

Which is how she ended up silently staring at Meisuke from across the apartment, awkwardly shifting on the couch as the butler sipped a beer can and flipping through the tv channels, blissfully unaware of the young woman's gaze.

...

Meisuke shifted uncomfortably in her futon, grumbling as she did. It was supposed to be early yet, but for some reason she could feel the bright light surrounding her. Uncomfortably forcing her eyes open, she recognized the reason: the lights had been flicked on, and Tohru knelt beside the bed, silently watching her sleep.

Blinking in surprise, the butler could only say, "Uh... what's up?"

The young woman shifted in place, her mouth arrayed in an awkward frown and a blush slowly filling her face. "U-um!" She began, "I had a day off today, so I wanted to give you a day off too!"

"Okay...?" Meisuke replied, raising an eyebrow curiously. "But are you sure that's what you want? I mean, you don't get a whole lot of time off work... are you sure this is how you want to spend it?"

Her own brow furrowing in determination, Tohru said, "O-of course! I made breakfast, a-and while you're off eating it, I'll clean up here!"

Sweeping her gaze slowly across her small, spartan living space, Meisuke wondered exactly how Tohru planned to clean it any further than it already was. Deciding it would be better to simply accept whatever the young woman was doing and go along with it, she rose to her feet and went to see what Tohru had made for breakfast.

...

Riko poked the burnt pile of ash sitting on her plate with a pair of chopsticks experimentally, and Meisuke couldn't help but agree with the implied comment. The household's leader was many things, some positive, others more up for interpretation; a good cook was not one of them. With a sigh she rose and crossed to the cupboards, preparing a more appropriate meal for them.

"What's up with Miss Tohru?" The small dragoness piped up, more than a little put off by the situation. "She's been running around all this morning, trying to clean up and stuff. And..." cringing slightly, she finished, "well, she's never been all that good at it."

With a small sigh Meisuke answered, "Honestly? I have no idea. Let's just hope that she calms down before she accidentally causes some big-"

"DONE!" Tohru shouted from the next room.

"Oh no..." the butler muttered, realizing that that room was hers.

...

It was too early for many things. Taking the wind out of the proudly beaming Tohru's sails was among them, a fact Meisuke reflected on as she swept her gaze across her previously well-ordered bedroom.

Honestly, she had no idea where the dust came from-Tohru was not, to the butler's knowledge, magically inclined, nor was it a result of any deliberate artifice on her part-and the balls of paper and bits of plastic were a surprise as well. It would've been impressive, really, if it didn't mean Meisuke was now preoccupied with fixing it.

Placing her hand on the young woman's shoulder with a sigh, Meisuke said, "Go sit on the couch... I have to talk with you."

...

What's gotten into her? Meisuke wondered, stepping out into the hall after Tohru. She hasn't been this clingy or eager to please since I first came here... maybe something happened? But what?

The doorbell rang, interrupting her pondering so that she could answer it. Pulling the door open, she found Joui waiting with a paper bag clutched in her hands and her glasses pushed far up her nose.

"U-um!" The part-time maid awkwardly began, "I-I was really thankful for your help, and I wanted to express that, a-and so I made some cookies, and, um..." She paused to gulp air before thrusting the bag at the butler, saying, "here!"

As she took hold of the bag and opened her mouth to make a reply, however, she heard a harsh growling from behind her. Turning in confusion, she found Tohru peering from behind a corner of the apartment wall. Oh... Meisuke mused, stroking her chin in realization. I guess she saw me with Elma last night...

"What's the..." Elma started to ask before taking notice of Tohru and quietly retreating, pulling the door shut as she went.

Silence filled the apartment as the door shut with a soft click.

Finally, Tohru spoke.

"I don't want to be clingy or jealous. I don't want to be a bother to you-especially with how much trouble I already cause." She said. "And I don't want to control you, or demand that you tell me everything you do or everyone you hang out with. But... even then... some things hurt me because of who you do them with, or how little you tell me about them. I put up with it by telling myself how close we are... I tell myself that we're close, that we'll always be close... but then I end up feeling like I'm not worth your time. Like I'm not worthy of you." A tear started to roll down her cheek. "I try not to feel inadequate all the time, but... when you go around and do things and don't even tell me afterwards, it feels like you're ignoring me. You don't do it because you want me to feel that way, I know that... I know you do it because you don't think it's that important, or because you don't want to make me worried, but... I still do. And I don't want to push my feelings on you... but that doesn't make hiding them hurt less."

For a moment Meisuke allowed the silence to return as she considered both the words Tohru had offered and her response. At length she said, "Tohru... I'm sorry. This wasn't supposed to be some kind of sneaking around thing, and it wasn't like I was trying to hide anything from you. Even though I've been around you so much lately... I've been alone for centuries. Longer than that even. Being around other people has never really been my strong point, no matter how hard I try to pretend otherwise or act like it is. No matter how little I want to hurt you, I still end up doing it because of who I am... but... that feels like an excuse."

She paused for a moment before pulling Tohru into a tight hug, eliciting a squeal of surprise and embarrassment from the young woman. "I don't want to hurt you, but I don't know how to stop. And... I'm sorry for being selfish still, but I want to stay near you even if it's painful. So I'll try not to do things that make it harder on you, okay?"

For a moment neither said nothing. Finally, Tohru began to bob her head in silent agreement.

***End of Chapter 21***