A/N: Hey guys! I'm back. As promised, here's an alternate version of Severance. I apologize if the original was more morbid and didn't have a happy ending like my stories usually do. I wanted to try something different with not only a tragic ending but with leaving the question of "Why" someone would resort to something like that. Anyway, so here's the version with an alternate ending. It's pretty much the same until you get to Cody's POV so if you don't want to read the whole thing again, I understand. I hope you like it. Please review and let me know what you think. Take care and stay safe. Love, Ellivia22

Disclaimer: Suite Life is still not mine. If it was I would've had a much better season 3 of SLOD.

Severance

Alternate Version

Zack

The day has finally come; the day I've been longing for since Cody and I started at Seven Seas High. Graduation. Finally, I will be free from the annoying school work and dumb teachers; I'll be away from adult supervision and on my own. Instead of feeling elated like I should be, I feel depressed. In fact, I've never felt so low. Not just because of the fact the Maya dumped me, but because whenever I think about the future, I am constantly reminded of my twin brother and how I ruined his.

I let out a despondent sigh while I'm packing my clothes in my open suitcase. Despite the fact that I ruined Cody's internship and a chance for a scholarship I held onto the hope that he would still get accepted into the school of his dreams. Then once Cody got accepted into Yale he would finally forgive me for everything I did to him over Spring Break. Last, but certainly not least, I'd finally be able to forgive myself for hurting the person I love the most. But all my hopes were dashed the moment Cody received his rejection letter.

This isn't like all the other times you messed up! This affects my whole future!

A tear falls down my cheek. I was so stupid and selfish. I had been that way all our lives. Instead of taking care of my little brother and protecting him, I've done the exact opposite. I only cared about myself and my needs and didn't put him first like I was supposed to. Cody had every right to disown me. If I were in his position I would've done the same. I hate myself so much.

But what if there is another explanation? A hopeful voice whispers in my head. Maybe Yale's decision to reject Cody had nothing to do with you-or his internship. Maybe the school is just too full

I perk up slightly as I feel a surge of hope consume me. It's true, Cody's letter didn't specifically explain why he was rejected. There could be another reason. Maybe it has nothing to do with my actions during his internship. I have to find out. My relationship with Cody depends on it.

My hand shaking, I grab my cellphone from off the bed, which was lying next to an unopened letter from Rice University-another rejection letter. Then after doing a quick Google search I dial the number to Yale's admissions office.

My heart pummels hard against my chest while I hear the ringing on the phone. What I am about to learn will either ease my strong guilt or completely break me.

"Yale admissions office," a bored sounding voice answers on the other end.

I clear my throat nervously. "Uh hi my name is Za- I mean Cody Martin. I'm calling in regards to my application. I would like to know why I was rejected."

"Just a minute. Let me pull it up."

The tightness in my chest increases rapidly with nerves the longer I have to wait. My palms begin to sweat profusely it's difficult to keep clutching onto my cellphone. Along with all that, my hope is diminishing and it's a struggle to keep my emotions at bay

"Okay, thanks for waiting," the woman says a few seconds later. "According to the notes on your profile, Mr. Martin, you were rejected because of the events that occurred during your internship at Pacific Northwest Biology Reserve. The damage you and brother caused at the aquarium was more than a billion dollars." I gulp. "Shenanigans like that are not tolerated at Yale, so unfortunately we had to reject your application. I'm sorry."

Tears fall rapidly down my face. The pain in my chest is becoming worse with each passing minute. I feel as though my heart is literally breaking. My voice rises high in spirals of desperation. "B-but it wasn't his- I mean my fault! My brother is the one to blame. Please reconsider!"

"I'm sorry," the woman says in a more sympathetic tone. "Unfortunately there is nothing I can do. Have a good day." Before I can protest further, she hangs up.

I lose feeling in my knees. Weakly I collapse on the end of my bed. I cover my wet face with my hands. I sob harder than I've ever cried in my life.

You never mean to do it, Zack! You just do it!

I had finally done it. I officially ruined Cody's life and there's nothing I can do to make up for it. Breathing is nearly impossible the harder I cry. I love my brother, I truly do. In fact, he's the one I've always loved the most because he's my little brother, my best friend. Most importantly, he is the only one who truly believed in me. Because of my ego, I never showed him how much he means to me. I end up hurting him instead. Once Cody learns the truth I'm going to lose him forever.

I am so consumed with feelings of guilt and self-hatred that I don't hear the door to my cabin open. "Zack, are you ready to go? Mom and dad are- Hey, are you okay?" Cody sits next to me on the bed. His arm goes protectively over my shoulders. "What's wrong?"

I don't have the strength to answer. "I know it really hurts right now and you miss Maya," Cody says gently. "It will continue to hurt for a while, but I promise you things will get better. I will always be there for you if you need me to help you through this."

Finally, I have the courage to lift up my head from my soaked hands. Cody is staring at me, looking very worried and concerned. I can see the emotions behind his identical blue eyes. He's feeling the anguish that has consumed me. I know that I should tell him the real reason behind my pain- that I am responsible for ruining his future, but I just can't. Instead, I hug my brother tight. I never want to let go. I don't want to lose him. I'm selfish like that. I've always been selfish and always will be.

Cody is surprised at first by my sudden action. Probably because I very rarely show affection. After a moment he wraps his arms protectively around me and gives me a big hug. His hand runs through my hair in an attempt to soothe me. "It's okay," he whispers. "You're going to be okay."

His words, though gentle and caring, don't make me feel any better. In fact, I feel worse. I'm not okay and when I finally get the courage to tell my brother the truth, I will never be okay again.

When we finally get off the S.S. Tipton an hour later Mom and Dad decided to take us to Neptune's Ocean, a popular seafood restaurant in Boston, to celebrate our recent graduation from high school. Instead of it being a joyous occasion it's been a very silent dinner actually. I can't stop thinking about that horrible phone call. I wish with all my heart that I never called Yale in the first place, but I had to know the truth.

I glance at Cody beside me. He's not eating either. Instead, he's just pushing his food around with his fork. Despite comforting me earlier his face is pale, his blue eyes dull. He looks just as miserable as I feel. I don't need to use our twin telepathy to know that he's thinking about Yale. I wish this day would end.

"Cheer up boys!" Mom attempts to say in an attempt to lighten the mood. 'This is a great day for both of you."

"Your mother is right," dad agrees, taking a bite of his coconut shrimp. "You're about to enter the best stage of your lives: Adulthood. Zack, think about the hot babes you're going to meet. Especially when you find a job and start working."

"And Cody, don't worry about Yale," Mom adds. "If you don't want to try for another school, you could always apply for Yale next year. In the meantime, you can go to the local community college and get all of your general courses out of the way."

For the rest of the dinner Mom and Dad chat with Cody about possible plans for the future. In fact, they don't acknowledge me much at all. As much as it hurts, I'm not surprised. Mom and Dad are still very angry at me for destroying the car that Cody let me have. Just one more thing that I've messed up. I block out their voices the best I can and focus my attention on my plate. It's a constant struggle to keep my emotions back. If I start crying again, I won't be able to stop.

Cody, why can't you be dumb like your brother?

Nobody has actually said it, but there is no question that Cody is the favorite. Not just in our family, but in general with our friends and the adults. Why shouldn't he be? He's the good twin, the one with straight A's. He never gets in trouble like I do and he cares about people. I am the disappointment; the selfish one who nobody could stand or trust. The dumb twin who barely graduated high school. The bad twin who will probably end up on drugs or in jail. I glance at my brother sadly. And soon I'll once again be the hated twin. The self-loathing I feel at this moment is more than I can stand.

Of all the twins I had to be stuck with, why did it have to be you?!

I can't pretend anymore. It's time I finally accept the truth. I'll never be Cody. I'm not smart. I'm selfish. The screw-up. Nobody cares about me. I don't matter. I can't keep hurting the people I love. It's time I did what I should've done a long time ago. I have to break the bond between me and Cody-permanently. It's the only way I can stop ruining his life. I clench my fist around my fork to hide its shaking. At the same time, I try to block my thoughts and emotions from Cody. I just hope that I'm brave enough to do what must be done.

Cody

By the time the sun rises the next morning, I'm feeling even more worn out. I didn't sleep at all, and it had nothing to do with the fact that I'm not used to my old bed at the Tipton Hotel. All I could do was not only think about my rejection from Yale but worry about Zack.

I can't quite put my finger on it, but something is really wrong with my twin. He's acting so strange. At first, I thought it had something to do with his break up with Maya, but the longer I laid in bed and thought about it, the more I started to suspect it's something more. Instead of acting like nothing bothers him like he usually does, my brother was more depressed than I've ever seen him. Well, depressed might not be the best word. More like...devastated. I try to venture into his mind to find out what is wrong, but he's blocked me out.

I finally give up on going back to sleep when the sun has completely risen. Instead, I take a shower and get ready for the day. Mom has a singing gig this morning at another hotel and Dad went back to his band in Seattle so Zack and I have the suite to ourselves for a while. In order to distract myself from Yale and worrying about Zack, I plan on going to the local community college as Mom suggested. It would be nice to get the general courses out of the way. That way when I finally do get into Yale I can focus on the more important classes.

Zack is just rising from bed when I return from my shower. That's strange in itself. Usually, he sleeps until noon. When our eyes meet I notice that he looks much worse than he did last night. His face is unnaturally pale and there is no spark of life behind his eyes of blue. Judging by the dark circles under his eyes it looks like he got just as much sleep as I did. "Hey, how are you feeling?" I attempt to say in a cheerful tone. I fail miserably. Instead, my tone is full of worry.

"Fine," Zack says in a monotone that sets off warning bells in my head. He's definitely not fine. His behavior is scaring me greatly. It's like he's a completely different person and I don't like it at all. He's not acting like the Zack I know. The upbeat, cheerful, egotistical one. The brother I love.

I sit beside him on the bed. "You know that you can talk to me about anything, right? You don't have to suffer alone." He pointedly avoids looking at me. His body language tells me that he wants to be alone. It's the last thing I want to do, but maybe he just needs some time without me nagging him. He'll talk to me when he's ready. I hope. "Well, I'm going to go to the community college to check out on classes. We can grab lunch when I get back then go to the arcade. Just like old times."

I'm nearly at the door when Zack's choked voice stops me in my tracks. "C-Cody, wait."

Right when I turn around I feel arms around me tight. This hug is even tighter than when I comforted him in his room yesterday-if that's possible. I don't mind. "There's something I need to tell you. I-I've been too afraid to say anything because I don't want to lose you again."

I pull away slightly, my hands resting on his shoulders. "You won't ever lose me, Zack. I promise. Thanks to the Gemini project I understand you better than I ever have. I love you and nothing will change that."

It's as if the glass is shattering behind his eyes of blue. He looks even more devastated if that's possible. I can feel the anguish in him increasing. I don't understand. Why aren't my words of comfort helping? Why am I making him feel worse instead? Zack swallows the lump in his throat and hangs his head. "Codes, I want you to know that I'm truly sorry for everything I've ever done to you. N-not just during Spring Break, but our whole lives. I-I've never been the brother you deserve. I've been so selfish and uncaring. I want you to know t-that I do care about you and love you more than anything. I promise you that I will never ruin your life again."

I'm at a loss for words. Zack has never spoken so intensely before. I hug him again. "Thanks, big brother. That means so much to me. I love you, too." When I finally pull away I wipe the tears off my face that managed to escape. Tears are in Zack's eyes too. "I'll be back in a couple of hours. We can go where ever you want for lunch."

He nods mutely. Then before things become too much I leave the room, hoping that Zack will be in much better spirits when I return.

Fifteen minutes later I'm standing outside the hotel waiting for a cab to come to pick me up to take me to the community college. It's a really warm day and the street is crowded with pedestrians and tourists that people keep bumping into me. I sigh irritably. It's going to take forever for me to get a cab.

My chest burns. I can still feel Zack's emotions strongly as if I am still in the same room as him. He's not feeling any better. I suddenly have second thoughts about going to the community college today. Zack needs me. I can't just abandon him.

When the yellow and black taxicab pulls up in front of me I suddenly feel very strange. The anguish from Zack I was feeling moments ago has dropped another level-if that's possible. Despair. I can't leave him alone. Something is wrong. Something is terribly wrong. I have to go back. I have to check on him. Now.

Quickly I turn on my heel and run in the opposite direction. I push past several surprised and angry pedestrians as I make my way back to the Tipton hotel. I don't care about them. They don't matter. Only Zack does.

"Cody, please act your age," Mr. Moseby, the new (and old) Tipton manager scolds as I run into the lobby. I pay him no mind. My heart is beating hard against my chest and I feel physically sick.

"COME ON!" I yell anxiously at the elevator as it slowly takes me up slowly floor by floor. The longer I sense my brother's despair, the worse I feel.

When I finally reach the 23rd floor I don't waste any time. Hurriedly I open the door with the key I've had all my life. The kitchen and living room look the same, but I immediately can feel that something is horribly wrong.

"Zack, are you okay," I say, opening the door to our room. "I felt-no. NO!"

It's as if I have walked straight into a nightmare. Hanging from the ceiling fan, motionless, is my twin brother. H-he didn't. He wouldn't! Not my brother!

I grab the chair that is knocked over under his feet. My hands tremble as I attempt to cut the bed sheet that is tightly around his neck. Tears are already streaming down my face and my chest is aching. I can't be too late! I just can't be!

I struggle with Zack's dead weight when I finally free him from the sheet. Together we tumble to the ground. He doesn't move. I don't hesitate. "C-Come on, Zack!" I press hard on his chest, my eyes not leaving his pale face. I try not to look at the horrible red mark around his neck. "D-don't do this to me!"

I continue pressing hard on his chest over and over again and blowing into his mouth. I refuse to give up. Not until he comes back to me. "P-please! Come back to me!" I beg hoarsely. "I need you!"

Just when I'm about to give up Zack's eyes pop open and he lets in a gasp of breath. I pull away slightly, sitting back on my heels while my twin sits up, struggling to inhale some air. Instantly the tightness in my chest eases up. He's alive. I wasn't too late.

It takes a couple of minutes before he's able to breathe properly again. Not surprising after what he had just attempted to do. I watch silently as he looks up at the ceiling fan, then back at the ground. "Damnit," he mutters under his breath. "I was so close."

He finally notices that I'm there. "Cody?"

I can't control my emotions anymore. Before I can stop myself I pull back and punch my brother hard in the face. The impact knocks him back on the ground.

BAM!

My knuckles ache, but I don't care. I breathe hard, my eyes wide. I've never hit my brother before, but he definitely deserves it.

"OW! Dude! What the hell?!" Zack says irritably, rubbing his eye. His expression is also of utter shock.

"You idiot!" I yell at him, my voice shaking from the hysteria. Tears are still streaming down my face at a rapid rate. I pull him by the shirt and wrap my arms around him. I hug him as tight as I can. My heart is pounding hard against my chest. I can't believe I almost lost him. "What were you thinking?! Why would you try to do something so stupid?!"

Zack forces himself out of my tight grip. He glares back at me, his hand covering his eye. It's starting to swell. Despite the hostile environment at the present moment, he's finally acting somewhat like himself. His teeth are clenched "None of your damn business."

"None of my business?! Of course it's my business! You just tried to kill yourself! Why Zack? Why would you do something so selfish?!"

"Selfish?! I was doing you a favor! With me gone there will be no one around to ruin your life!"

His comment catches me off guard. I suddenly remember the last words he said to me before I left the suite.

I promise you that I'll never ruin your life again

So that's what he meant. He thought that he was sparing me pain by ending his life. Doesn't he realize that his suicide would've done the total opposite? He is the most important person in my life. After all, he is my twin. I wouldn't be able to go on without him. Before I am able to voice this, Zack continues.

"And since you'll probably add this to the list of things you'll never forgive me for, I might as well tell you why I tried to end it all. It's my fault you got rejected from Yale!"

I stare at him in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

Zack's expression changes from angry to miserable. He lowers his gaze to his hands, which are now resting in his lap. "I-I called Yale yesterday to find out why you were rejected. I had to know if it had anything to do with your internship. Well, turns out it did. You were rejected from Yale because of me, because of what I did." Tears fall down his face rapidly. "I-I'm so sorry, buddy. I'm the worst big brother ever. You have every right to hate me."

My first initial reaction is anger. Of course it's Zack's fault I didn't get into Yale. I immediately regret feeling such emotion when I feel his emotions. Deep shame and self-hatred. I now understand why he resorted to such drastic action. "You tried to kill yourself because of me," I barely choke out. "Because you thought I'd end up hating you again."

"You disowned me once," Zack mutters sadly. "I knew that once you found out the truth about your Yale application you'd do it again. So I figured that I would spare you by getting rid of myself."

My brother's anguished confession tears me up on the inside. Though my eyes are blurred from the tears I keep shedding, I can't take my gaze off the vibrant red mark around his neck from the bedsheet.

I had almost lost him. My twin brother, my only brother. If I had come just ten minutes later, he would've been dead. Finally, I realize the gravity of my actions and my words. I had been blaming Zack for everything wrong in my life when it wasn't all his fault. I chose to go after him in the Aquarium. I am as much to blame as he is. Not only that, I didn't act as a brother should. Instead, I spent the entirety of Spring Break insulting him and yelling at him. Worst of all, when I finally did forgive him, I never told him so. I just assumed he knew. No wonder he resorted to this. Deep down he must still think that I hate him when it's far from the truth. Zack isn't the worst brother. I am.

Wordlessly I pull my older brother back into my arms. Zack clutches onto me tight as if I'm his only lifeline. Judging by how low his emotions are, I am his lifeline. I can't stop my body from shaking. "Y-you're not a bad brother, Zack," I say in a choked whisper. "I am. I was so harsh and cruel. I hurt you. Oh, I hurt you so much. I-I drove you to do this. I'm so sorry."

Zack pulls back slightly in confusion. "Why are you sorry? I deserve it. I'm the one who ruined your future."

I shake my head. "No. You didn't ruin my future. I ruined my own future. I was the one who chose to go after you in the Aquarium. I was wrong to put the blame solely on you. I was wrong to say all the things I said. I hope you know that I don't hate you. I never could."

Hope begins to build in his eyes of blue. "R-Really?"

I smile at him. "Really. You're my older brother, my twin and I love you more than anything. Nothing can change that."

"Not even Yale?"

I nod, the tears still falling from my eyes. "Not even Yale."

For the first time in the past two days, Zack smiles a truly genuine smile. Immediately I can feel the anguish that he's feeling disappear and instead replaced with happiness and immense relief. "I love you too, Codes. I'm sorry I scared you."

"I forgive you. Just don't try that again or you'll get more than a punch in the face."

"Noted," Zack says, rubbing his eye again.

I hug my brother again, enjoying the closeness of our bond once more. I make a promise to myself here and now to not let anything come between our bond again.

The End

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