AN: Gosh darn all of you and your (completely justified) requests to see a resolution with Gwaine. This fic sat on my computer for weeks because I knew that lack of a resolution was a problem, but I eventually gave up and published it anyway. And unfortunately, no one would let me get away with that. Also unfortunately, I have not one, but TWO other fics right now (which may or may not ever see the light of day) where I'm trying to write some kind of fight between Merlin and Gwaine, and I'm finding out they are enormously difficult to write. I can do funny Gwaine. I can do protective Gwaine. Hurt/angry Gwaine? That's a challenge that has kicked my butt. On three fronts. But I did my best, because I love you all.

Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin

Bonus Scene: Gwaine

The first drink was always Gwaine's favorite. His taste buds were still alert enough to appreciate it, his mind still clear enough to enjoy it. And even though there was no buzz, there was the anticipation of the coming buzz, and sometimes that was almost better.

He found a seat at an empty table in the back of the tavern, tucked into the shadows where he wouldn't be easily spotted. But his mug had barely touched his lips before someone plopped into the seat across from him. And he truly plopped, letting gravity drop him into the chair rather than lowering himself into it. And even once he was sitting, he wobbled a bit.

"Hi Gwaine," he said with a glassy smile that made Gwaine raise his eyebrows.

"Merlin," he greeted him coolly. He didn't particularly feel like drinking with anyone, but he especially didn't feel like drinking with the man across from him. Which was a bit ironic, given how often Gwaine tried and failed to get him to spend the evening in the tavern. Still, he couldn't help his curiosity. "Are you drunk?"

He'd never asked Merlin that before. The question had always gone the opposite direction.

"No," Merlin said emphatically. "Not anymore. I don't think. Not entirely sober, but I don't think I'm drunk."

"So you were drunk?" Gwaine swatted away a spark of concern. It wasn't his problem if Merlin had drunk too much. So what if it was barely past dinnertime and Merlin never drank during the day?

"I was definitely drunk," Merlin admitted with a wince. "It wasn't my fault though. Arthur started it. The wine was just supposed to help with nerves. He's the one who decided we should keep going."

Gwaine set his own drink down on the table, trying to talk himself out of caring, but the words came out anyway. "You spent the day drinking with Arthur?"

Apparently Merlin wasn't averse to heavy drinking in general. He was just averse to heavy drinking with Gwaine.

Merlin nodded, and the glazed look in his red eyes faded as he stared at his friend, his expression suddenly serious.

"I told him the truth. About a secret I'd been keeping."

Gwaine went very still, apart from his grip on his mug tightening. He met Merlin's gaze, but stayed silent.

"He told me he overheard Lancelot and I talking by the stream that day, months ago," Merlin said slowly, watching Gwaine's reaction as he spoke. "He said you did as well."

His stomach turned at the memory, and he looked away. Then Merlin surprised him by putting his own thoughts into words, his voice low and guilty.

"That's why you've been so distant recently, isn't it? Because you learned I'd been lying to you. That I had a secret - an important secret - that I've never shared. You overheard what we said, and you believed I might not be the person you'd always thought I was. Didn't you?"

Gwaine glared at his mug. "The Merlin I knew was honest and straightforward and kind. He would never lie to all of us, or commit treason, or mock his friends. Maybe tease them to their faces, but not behind their backs. I thought I knew you, Merlin. I thought I knew you better than I knew anyone. I thought we were friends."

"I have magic."

The words spilled out abruptly, but Merlin murmured them so quietly that Gwaine wasn't sure he heard him correctly. His eyes jerked up to see Merlin glancing around the room nervously instead of watching Gwaine's reaction. His blue eyes were bright with fear as he chewed his lip, then he relaxed slightly and turned his attention back to his friend, apparently satisfied no one had overheard.

Gwaine stared, blinking and speechless. He hadn't wasted a lot of time speculating about what Merlin's secret might be. The fact that he had the secret was all he needed to know. But if he had speculated, if he had tried to guess, magic certainly would not have crossed his mind.

"I was born with it," Merlin continued quietly. "And I never told anyone. Ever. Not before telling Arthur this morning, at least. A few people found out, usually because they saw me saving their lives at some point. Gaius. Lancelot. And my mother knows, of course. But it's sorcery, Gwaine. In Camelot. I couldn't tell anyone."

Merlin watched patiently as Gwaine sat in silence, staring at him in shock. When he finally spoke, his voice came out softer than he intended.

"You could have told me."

But Merlin was shaking his head before Gwaine even finished the sentence. "I would never divide your loyalties like that. You're a knight of Camelot. Your first loyalty is to the crown. To Arthur. I would never ask you to keep that secret. It would make you a criminal."

"I would have done it." To Gwaine's relief, his voice came out firmer now. "I've always protected you, Merlin."

"I know," his friend agreed. "That has never been a question in my mind. But I couldn't put you in that position."

"You put Lancelot in that position," Gwaine pointed out bitterly, but Merlin shook his head again.

"Lancelot caught me. I allowed him to help protect me after that, but I never would have intentionally chosen to ask that of him."

Gwaine nodded and swirled his mug around, watching the ale spiral inside it. "And the fish?" He made sure to keep his voice even and apathetic as he asked. And to his surprise, Merlin rolled his eyes.

"I used ma—" he broke off again, glancing around, and amended, "I used it to catch the fish." He sounded slightly annoyed. "On trips like those, sometimes it's tricky to use it, and I start to get antsy if I go too long without it. I didn't want you along because I couldn't use it with you there. I had just bragged about being good at fishing, and it would have taken me forever. Arthur would have given me so much grief. It had nothing to do with not wanting your company."

Gwaine kept his eyes on the ale. What Merlin said made sense, but he could still hear those words, dismissive and mocking. It would have taken ten times longer if Gwaine had come.

And yet...he tried to think back. Had they been mocking? In his memory, Merlin's tone was harsh, even cruel. But now he wondered if his mind had distorted the memory, making it worse than it really was.

"Gwaine…" Merlin sighed. "Everyone else...they want something from me. Or they need something. You're the only person I can just be with, you know? I'm not washing your socks or protecting you from assassins. And you're not wanting me to solve all the problems of the world or figure out the answers for whatever threat is coming. I'm just Merlin. And I...I just really miss my friend."

Gwaine's face tightened into a scowl, because he knew what was going to happen next. He was going to look up, and Merlin was going to have a pitiful look on his face. And Gwaine was going to forgive him, because magic or not, Merlin was just a twiggy helpless thing, and Gwaine needed to protect him from getting hurt.

And even though Gwaine now knew that wasn't exactly true, it would always be true to him.

He gave up on delaying the inevitable, but he was surprised by the expression on Merlin's face when he looked up.

Yes, it was pleading and sad, but it was also nervous and guilty, and even a little bit desperate.

Gwaine's glare screwed up even tighter before he let it go with a sigh. "Buy you a drink?" he asked gruffly, and Merlin's face lit up, then immediately fell again.

"Um, maybe a raincheck?" he said with a wince. "I just got the room to stop spinning."

Gwaine couldn't resist chuckling at that, and took a swig of his own drink.

"So. Magic?" He made sure to keep his voice quiet.

Merlin gave him a smile that was half nervous and half sheepish. "Yeah."

Gwaine thought for a moment.

"Wyverns?"

Merlin's surprise lasted only for a moment before he nodded. "Yes, that was me."

Gwain huffed, indignant. He'd been rather proud that he'd successfully fought off wyverns.

"That fire when we were kidnapped by slavers?"

"Well, your and Arthur's plan was terrible. Someone had to do something," Merlin pointed out defensively.

"Immortal army mysteriously vanishing?"

"Thank you!" Merlin said, nearly yelling as he slapped a hand on the table. "That's the sort of thing you should be asking about! Not getting knocked out with a lump of wood!"

Gwaine stared, taken aback, and Merlin blushed.

"Sorry," he muttered. "Arthur focused on all the wrong things when I told him."

A bit of his normal protectiveness rose up in Gwaine's gut, and he eyed Merlin suspiciously. "How did he take it? He apparently didn't kill you on the spot."

"No, he didn't," Merlin confirmed, his brow furrowing in confusion. "He behaved very oddly. He seemed to be fine with it, mostly. He said magic obviously wasn't evil if I have it. And then we got spectacularly drunk."

Gwaine raised an eyebrow and laughed. "Could have been worse, I suppose."

"Yes," Merlin said with an emphatic nod. "It certainly could have been. We'll see how he feels about it tomorrow when he's sober."

Well," Gwaine said with a reluctant smile, "if you need someone to have your back, you know where to find me."

Merlin grinned back. "Of course I do. In the tavern."

AN: Just before posting this, I realized that Merlin would never do this. Revealing his secret in public while mildly intoxicated is WAY past the bounds of what he'd be willing to risk. I also acknowledge that I rely too much in general on the "Gwaine drinks in a tavern" trope instead of doing his character justice by giving him real depth. But I'm too lazy to rewrite this in another setting, so you'll have to settle for me promising to try to do better in the future. :)