A/N: Kurt and Sebastian are lying under their Christmas tree with their son, waiting for him to fall asleep - Kurt, in the hopes that he can get the rest of their Christmas preparations finished before the big morning, and Sebastian, in the hopes that he gets to "finish" with his husband. (Timeline wise, kind of a jump backwards to their first Christmas with Thomas.)
Written for the Hummel Holidays Drabble prompt 'Christmas Eve', and inspired by the OTP Prompt - "Imagine your OTP sleeping in a giant nest of blankets and pillows with their child(ren) nestled between them."
Sebastian shifts on his numb hip, batting a hand behind his kinked spine to dislodge a rock-hard, package, the corner of which keeps digging into the small of his back.
"I can't…urgh…believe…Jesus Christ…we're going to sleep under this Christmas tree all night," he complains in a not-too-subtle whisper.
"Shhh," Kurt hisses, scooting three inches to his left on his own numb hip when he finds himself in a similar predicament as his husband. "We're not. We're just going to wait until I'm sure he's passed out, and then carry him to his room."
"Well, when's that going to be?" Sebastian groans, propping up on one elbow and smacking his forehead into a red glass ornament, almost knocking it off its branch.
"He just started snoring about five minutes ago," Kurt says, "so I'd say let's give him five more minutes."
"Good," Sebastian sighs, giving up on the present menacing him and yielding to another five minutes of discomfort, "because I'm really looking forward to getting our Christmas Eve nookie on."
Sebastian winks, but Kurt stares at him, shaking his head slowly in disgust.
"Uh, no," Kurt says. "We are not doing that. It's Christmas Eve."
"O-kay, that is literally the strangest thing you have ever said to me," Sebastian says. "Why would it being Christmas Eve keep us from having lots of dirty, sordid sex?"
"Shhh!" Kurt shushes unnecessarily. "Don't say that! You don't know if he's fully asleep or not."
"He is," Sebastian counters, covertly peeking at his son's face to make sure. "Yeah, he's asleep."
"You don't know." Kurt puts a cupped hand over the boy's ear to block their conversation. "What if he's at that midpoint between asleep and awake, where he can still here what's going on? What if what you just said is now lingering in his subconscious, waiting until he hits REM sleep, and it gives him nightmares?"
"What are you even talking about?" Sebastian scoffs.
"It happened to me once, on a road trip I took with my dad to Illinois. He didn't notice me falling asleep in the passenger seat. He started talking about stopping at a gas station for chips, and asked me if I wanted something to drink. The next thing I knew, I was trapped in a cooler, and Kool-Aid Man was trying to drown me inside his bulbous pitcher belly."
This time Sebastian stares, jaw dropped.
"You know what? I was entirely wrong before," Sebastian says. "That is the strangest thing you have ever said to me."
"Whatever. I'm not taking any chances."
"Well, in that case, why don't we just stay down here all effin' night, stuck under this tree? I doubt I could stand up again if I wanted to anyhow."
"Because you've still got a bicycle to put together," Kurt says, inching his way out from his cramped spot beside his son and husband, "and I've got about eighty more presents to wrap before the family comes over tomorrow."
"Wow," Sebastian says, following his husband, carefully sliding across the floor, his back cramping and his hips sore, "that sounds like it's going to be a pain in the ass. I think I got off easy with the bike."
"Yeah, well, I looked over the instructions for that bike" – Kurt lets out a groan, rising to his feet, stretching his back and getting reacquainted with his limbs – "I'd say you might be screwed, too, and that's coming from someone who used to rebuild engines in his dad's shop."
"Look" – Sebastian takes Kurt's right arm, massaging it gently while he speaks – "you've put so much work into this Christmas, making sure everything's perfect for Thomas, and you've done an incredible job."
Kurt watches his husband move on to his left arm, giving it the same attention, floored by his sudden and unsolicited praise.
"Thank you," Kurt says, curling into his husband's arms. "I didn't think that you noticed."
"I did." Sebastian hugs Kurt close, kissing his forehead. "And it sounds like it's going to be a long night for both of us, so how about you hop in a nice, hot shower while I get the munchkin to bed. Then I'll get that bike going, and hey, how about I take half those presents off your plate."
Kurt nods, his own smile matching the oddly accommodating grin on his husband's face – a grin that seems more than just a little off, but Kurt decides to play along.
"I'll definitely take you up on that," Kurt says. "Thank you."
Kurt continues to smile at Sebastian. Sebastian smiles back, bobbing his head ridiculously in constant agreement until he realizes he's not going to win.
"We're still not having sex tonight, are we?" Sebastian asks, giving his husband's ass a squeeze.
"Not a chance, big guy," Kurt says, pecking a kiss to his husband's lips, "but good try."