The Chart

"YOU WIN, LUH-LOYD! YOU WIN!" shouted Lord Garmadon, completely interrupting the Ninja's Volcano Movie Night as he charged in, swept his son right off the sofa, and began crying lava tears in delight.

Wisely, Cole hit pause. This could take a while.

"Dad! ... Squishing! ... Me!" choked out Lloyd, squirming to try loosen his Dad's Oni-strong grip around his chest before he cracked a couple ribs. Again.

Kai snuck up behind the two Garmadons for the express purpose of putting out the little fires started by Lord Garmadon's tears on the carpet without disrupting the beautiful(?) father-son moment.

"What did he win?" asked a curious Jay.

"He's the best! My son even beat ME! I've never been so proud!"

None of that was news to any of the Ninja, and Garmadon said the same thing at some point, in some manner, basically every week, so the tears seemed a bit excessive.

Garmadon continued. "I always suspected, but now that my nerds have finished the chart, I can PROVE it! My son is the best! He even slaughtered you five losers!"

"A chart to prove who is best?" asked Zane, perking up. He always liked charts. "Best in what way? Or is it an overall thing? How do you quantify the-"

"Come see!" cheered Garmadon, setting Lloyd down only to grab his arm and run off, loudly continuing his boasting that Lloyd was the BEST and now he could PROVE it!

~~ ! Go Ninja Go ! ~~

This was... not what Lloyd expected. He was surely already bright red from mortification.

Though, in hindsight, he really should've expected something like this.

The title of the chart was "Property Damage". It was scored in Ninjagian currency, thankfully rounded to the nearest *coughmillioncough*.

First. Spinjitzu. Master. He'd never been so embarrassed. And his friends eyes had never been so brightly glowing in glee at the future blackmail opportunities, as they eagerly tapped specific dots on the interactive display (it wasn't even on PAPER), which then opened boxes listing out the kind of irrefutable details. It had hyperlinks to government websites for the data and everything.

"This can't be right," Lloyd tried to protest, but it came out as barely above a whisper. "Surely... A-HA!"

He quickly jumped forward, tapping the highest data point, which opened up to damage caused by Meowthra. Which Garmadon, or whichever math minion he'd assigned this project to, had neatly credited to Lloyd.

"I protest!" Lloyd declared. "The damage was caused by Meowthra, not me, and even if you don't credit her with any 'points', surely it's not ALL my fault! It was totally provoked!"

Garmadon shrugged at his son's protest and gestured to the cowering math minion to adjust the chart. The minion tapped at the attached computer, adding Meowthra as a separate 'contestant', and...

Lloyd still won. Though now Garmadon was a much closer second place. Meowthra came in third.

"Maybe we need to discuss the amount of missiles you stock your mech with?" Nya awkwardly tried to comfort Lloyd. Maybe. Her eyes still made it clear she was trying desperately not to fall to the floor in hysterical laughter. Like Kai, Cole, Jay, and Zane already had.

"I'm so proud!" sniffed Garmadon again, wiping more lava tears.

~~ ! Go Ninja Go ! ~~

Author's Notes: Don't remember if this was originally Sunny Lighter's idea or mine, but it's definitely one I agree with!