Summary: Longing to feel like a teenager again, Sebastian rents time in a haunted house to make out with his husband.
Notes: So, I missed these two, and I had intended on posting this in October, but I decided against it. I actually posted it for another pairing instead. Welp. Here it is.
"Why?" Kurt asks. And that's all he needs to ask, because after the length of time he and Sebastian have been married, Sebastian knows exactly what that one-word question means. Ergo:
"Because," is his only reply.
"What about Tom-Tom? We told him we'd be home before midnight!"
"Tom-Tom's fine," Sebastian assures him, leading him through crowds of adults and kids dressed in every costume under the sun, from about a dozen Pennywise clowns to an entire coven of vampires (one Klingon included), and something Sebastian thinks might have been a slutty minion. Or maybe a slutty Tic-Tac? He doesn't look too long. He doesn't need to lose his erection. After Kurt put on his costume - the tightest white slacks known to mankind, a clingy satin shirt, and the most epic angel wings ever crafted - his hard-on has been a constant presence since Tricks-or-Treats earlier.
Which is why Sebastian tossed Thomas into bed as soon as the babysitter arrived, grabbed his husband, and raced out for a little adult fun.
"We shouldn't be doing this!" Kurt snaps, but mostly to cover up for the fact that he's giggling – proof that he's having a better time than he's letting on.
"That's what makes doing this so much fun!" Sebastian pulls Kurt along, speeding past a ticket taker, up a short flight of stairs, over a tension barrier, and through the 'employees only' entrance, plunging them into the pitch-black belly of this hotel-turned haunted mansion - the biggest, most elaborate one in the county. It's renowned up and down the Eastern Seaboard. People travel for miles around every year just to come.
And they just skipped a line of about a hundred people and raced in like they own the place.
Which they could. Sebastian did mention something earlier about a 'big reveal'. Buying up a famous haunted house sounds like the kind of investment his husband would make.
Kurt glances over his shoulder at the people glaring venomously at them as they fly by, one of whom he may have actually clipped with his wing. "Sebastian! We're going to get caught!"
"We're not going to get caught! I paid All-Season Productions two grand to have the run of the place for an hour as long as we behaved ourselves."
"Well, we're not off to a good start. Cutting in line is just plain rude." Kurt doesn't mention that the way Sebastian throws his money around can be a real turn on sometimes. Even though the man is richer than Rockefeller, Kurt doesn't need them going into debt over blowjobs.
"What do I care about being rude? It's never been a concern of mine before."
"Yeah, well, you're a father now. The people in this town know you."
"Then they should know I'm an asshole."
"That's big talk for a man who just spent two hours in an inflatable pumpkin costume pretending to be Jackie the Jack O'Lantern at Thomas's school's Halloween Carnival."
"Yup. And I was an asshole jack o'lantern," Sebastian grumbles.
Kurt snickers. It's too much fun teasing his husband, and Sebastian makes it way too easy. But as sexy as it is seeing his husband be Mr. Large-and-in-Charge with his AmEx card, it's sexier watching him in the role of dedicated and loyal married father - a role he plays so well.
Besides, he ditched the puffy pumpkin costume, and now he's dressed as the hottest devil this side of Hades.
Kurt can't wait to get his hands on Sebastian's horns.
"Where are we going?"
"Somewhere where no one will look twice at us."
"Then why did I bother dressing in costume?"
"Because Kurt, let's face it, you love dressing in costume. You've got more costumes than clothes. You'd wear costumes even if it wasn't Halloween."
"True, true. But what are we doing here anyway?" Kurt follows close behind as Sebastian leads him up a winding staircase covered in torn sheets soaked to dripping in fake blood. "We're running past all the performers. Are we not here to be scared?"
"Nope. We're here to make out."
"You paid two thousand dollars so we could make out in a haunted house?"
"Mansion - yes."
"We could have spent that money on a room in the Hamptons! And still had money left over for dinner!"
"Come on, Kurt! Do something different for once! Have a little fun!"
"Fucking in the Hamptons is fun. And I still could have worn the costume."
"Isn't this something teenage you would have done?"
"Not particularly," Kurt groans, reaching down to rub his cramping left calf mid-run. "Don't you think we're a little old to be messing around like teenagers?"
"Never! Don't you miss being a teenager?"
"Miss puberty and acne and high school and homework? Not an inch."
Sebastian exits the staircase at the second to the last landing and pushes Kurt up against the cleanest of the goop-spattered walls. He'd been searching for this floor specifically – the one with the huge picture window he'd seen from the outside. It overlooked the main thoroughfare, its lights and decorations, with a hawk-eye's view of children in costume begging for candy while their older siblings roll their eyes, swiping sweets from their pillowcases when they're not looking.
"I've managed to find us the most horrifically romantic spot to hide away and be alone," Sebastian says, brushing his nose against Kurt's cheek, nudging his head to the side so he can reach his neck past his collar. "Don't kill the mood."
"I'm sorry," Kurt whispers, startling when he hears footsteps race by, the whirring of a chainsaw giving chase a little too close for comfort. "I might be a little nervous."
"Why, babe?"
"Because …" Kurt swallows hard "… I know all the makeup and the sound effects and whatnot aren't real, but …" Kurt jumps when a power drill buzzes from somewhere close by, followed by a bloodcurdling scream "… it's still unnerving."
"That's part of the fun. I wanted this to be memorable … thrilling … heart pounding …"
The drill buzzes again, closer this time, and Kurt shudders.
"You managed heart pounding. Bravo."
"Don't be nervous," Sebastian murmurs, licking circles down Kurt's neck with the tip of his tongue. "It's just you and me here."
"And the lovely cast of All-Season Productions apparently. Two thousand dollars richer, I might add."
"Relax, will ya?"
"I'm trying to, but I …"
Sebastian's mouth on Kurt's quiets him down, the press of his body quelling his trembling … or making it worse. At this point, Kurt can't tell. The whole building seems to be shivering with actors laughing and screaming kids. But that bleeds away when Sebastian takes hold of his wrists and pins them at his sides, weaving their fingers together in a gesture that's more endearing than possessive.
But still possessive enough to make Kurt's toes curl.
His body relaxes underneath Sebastian's weight and his heat – everything from Kurt's head to his feet melting against the wall. The whiz of the chainsaw doesn't bother him anymore, neither do the resulting screams. He's only vaguely aware of footsteps as they race up and down the staircase or barrel down the hall.
The ones that come to a screeching halt a few feet beside them, and the groan that follows soon after? That's harder to ignore.
"Eww!"
"What!?"
"What is it, Kendall!?"
"A zombie?"
"A skeleton?"
"A decapitated body being feasted upon by a rabid werewolf!?"
"No. It's old people making out!"
"Gross!"
"Are you serious?"
"See for yourself!"
"Yeah, no. That's not okay!"
"How can they allow that in here? Don't they know they're going to scar us for life!?"
"Let's get outta here! Find that guy with the chainsaw and forget all about this!"
"I don't think I can! It's gonna haunt my nightmares!"
"Sebastian …" Kurt growls, hands balling into fists.
Sebastian can't answer his husband, snickering into his shoulder while the air echoes with conversation.
"I don't know, Kendall. That guy dressed like an angel was kinda hot."
"Emily! He looks like my dad!"
"Yeah, and …?"
"…"
"Okay, you're not allowed over to my house anymore."
"I thought you said no one would see us!"
"That's not what I said! I said no one would look twice at us!"
"I'd say they looked more than twice, Sebastian!"
"Meh. A devil and an angel making out? They probably thought we were part of the show." Sebastian leans in for another taste of his husband's waiting mouth when his head suddenly pops up. "Wait a minute … they only mentioned you being hot. What about me? Hey, Emily!" Sebastian yells down the hall, fighting to be heard above the whine of power tools. "What about …?"
"Sorry, babe." Kurt grabs Sebastian's chin, tilting his mouth back his way. "Apparently I'm the hot dad in this relationship, and you're going to have to be okay with that."
"Yeah, you are," Sebastian purrs, loosening Kurt's tie to make it easier to assault his neck, particularly that sweet spot above his collarbone that he likes to have nibbled. "Does that mean I'm going to get a spanking later on?"
Kurt grins. He takes one of Sebastian's hands and drags it down his body, planting his palm on his crotch. "Only if you earn it, naughty boy."