Claire had wrapped a black cloak around her after obscuring her face, just in case, before teleporting into the Circle. She stayed hidden, searching for Feynriel. As she moved about the Gallows, she spotted Cullen again. She still had a strange fascination towards him, part wanting to know him better, and the other part fear of what he'd think of someone like her. Maybe one day, she would get up the courage to speak to him, to at least say hello.
She continued her search for Feynriel, finally sensing something of him. They seemed to be keeping him in a room, but since she could feel his energy, she could teleport to it without any problems. To her relief, he was alone.
"Are you ready?" She whispered. The boy stood up and nodded, so she grabbed him and teleported to the clinic, where she took the cloak and face covering off. "All right, now we just wait for Anders and Hawke. Are you all right?"
"Thank you so much." Feynriel said. "I'm fine, really."
"I'm just glad to have gotten you out of there." Claire said. Just then, the door slammed open and Anders came in looking pissed, with an equally angry Hawke behind him. "Are you two fighting again?"
"It's not my fault he refuses to listen to reason!" Anders snapped.
"And it's not my fault he refuses to listen to common sense!" Hawke threw his hands up in frustration. Claire sighed, knowing she honestly fell in the middle of it all, though she'd never talked about her beliefs to either of them before, not wanting to get them hating on her as well, but it was worth a try.
"Hawke, would you at least agree that mages are human, the same as everyone else?" She asked.
"I wouldn't say the same, but yes, they are human." Hawke looked a little confused.
"Couldn't we at least agree there should be a school for mages?" She asked. "A place like the Circle, where mages can come and go freely, fall in love, marry and have families while learning how to control their magic?" Hawke sighed and sat down, running his hand through his hair tiredly.
"What about the Templars?" He asked. "Surely you wouldn't be rid of them entirely."
"The Templars are slaves themselves to the Chantry." Claire said. "They are leashed by lyrium, and then given power over others. The Templars should be freed as well, and not allowed to have such power over another human. There should be no slavery. Let the Templars still exist, as bad mages will happen as we know all too well, but let them be more like the guard, to protect, not be prison keepers, and not leashed." Both Hawke and Anders stared at her, frowning.
"I suppose there could be some sort of compromise." Hawke said.
"Just as long as the mages are allowed to be as free as any other." Anders said. "I do agree there should be something to help mages learn to control their powers, but there should be no walls to cage us in."
"I know you two will probably never truly see eye to eye, but can we at least call it a truce now?" She asked, and both men nodded. "I know you two care about each other, and I hate seeing friends fight. Come, Hawke, you need to see my own made Circle. Perhaps it will at least ease the mood." She held out her hands for them, and then took them to the Planasene forest where her castle stood.
"It's a lot bigger than I expected!" Hawke said, staring at it. Then he looked at the few mages who had come to greet them, with only a few who weren't branded as tranquil.
"Claire, it's good to see you again." Trevor came running over. "And you, Anders." He glanced nervously at Hawke.
"Hawke is here as a friend, he will harm no one." Claire said. Trevor nodded slowly.
"I apologize for before." Hawke said. "Since meeting Claire, I've had to seriously reexamine my whole outlook on things... I'm certainly trying anyway."
"Trevor, this is Feynriel." Claire said, gesturing to the boy. "He'll be staying here for now, to be tutored in magic. His magic is a little different, but he can work with the others as well. I'll be taking care of the main part of his training, however." Trevor raised an eyebrow, but nodded. An older mage woman came up, her forehead clear of the mark indicating she was never tranquil, and smiled as she spotted Feynriel.
"Did I hear correctly, we have a new mage?"
"Indeed, Maude, this is Feynriel." Claire said. "Feynriel, Maude is our main healer here, so if you have any problems you can't take care of, she'll help you out."
"Thank you." Feynriel said. He seemed a little overwhelmed, so Claire decided it was time to get him settled in.
"Maude, do you think you could find him a room to sleep in?" Claire asked. "And perhaps find him some food, he was trapped in a nightmare for two days straight, so I imagine he needs to eat."
"Certainly, mistress!" Maude said. "Come with me, lad, I'll get you settled in right away."
"Take care of yourself, Feynriel." Hawke said. The boy nodded, then followed after the woman. Turning to Claire, Hawke said, "I admit, this is far different from what I was expecting."
"Wait until you see the gardens and the library." Claire said. "We've only been here maybe a year, but it's coming along nicely. Not all the mages want to come here, but the formerly tranquil have never wanted to go anywhere else. They just want a quiet place to live their lives. Many of them have had horrible problems dealing with their emotions after being cured, and it seems the longer they were tranquil, the worse is it, as if all the emotions they should have felt suddenly piles on them at once."
"That makes some sense." Hawke said. "But still, I'm sure they're glad to be cured."
"Yes, we've had no complaints about that so far."
All while Claire was showing him the castle, Hawke started feeling stranger, having conflicting feelings about everything. He knew his sister would have loved the castle and the very idea of its existence, and she probably would have been safer in the sanctuary than in the Circle. There were no Templars at the castle, they were all self guarded, though there was a Council of Elders. They knew their freedom could be taken away at any moment if they were found out, so they made sure to be careful.
How could he advocate for a Circle full of Templar guards when faced with such happy people? His mind went back to the psychotic murderer who took his mother's life, and then to all the blood mages he'd fought against, all the abominations... were there truly enough to justify what the Circle was doing?
"Are you all right?" Anders asked, and Hawke realized he was staring at his hands.
"I don't know." He replied softly. "I... have a lot to think about." He would still hunt the bad mages, but perhaps he should look deeper into the Circle's corruption.
"Perhaps I should take you back then." Claire said, looking worried. "I didn't mean to upset you with this."
"No, it's fine, honest." Hawke said. "But yes, perhaps I should get back." Claire nodded and patted his shoulder before teleporting him to his estate.
That night, Fenris came by, and Hawke was suddenly nervous around the elf. He knew how Fenris felt about mages, how could Hawke confide in him what he was thinking?
"You seem agitated." Fenris said. "Did something happen today?"
"We saved a mage boy from a demon." Hawke said. "And... seeing Claire in the Fade, seeing what she does... it makes me wonder."
"I still do not trust her." Fenris growled.
Hawke suddenly laughed. "You've never seen what she can do, have you? You've only seen a small portion... how she was ever a slave is beyond me, but Anders says it was because she hadn't fully realized her true potential. She could take over Tevinter, if she wanted, yet she hides in Darktown, healing people!" Which reminded him, he needed to ask her about her visions of the future.
"She is unlike any other mage we've ever seen." Fenris said. "Which is why she should not be trusted. In Tevinter, there are stories of mages called somniari who can delve into the dreams of others and manipulate their minds or even kill them in the Fade. If this woman is a somniari, we should kill her while we have the chance, take her unawares."
"I'm not killing her." Hawke said, getting angry. "You're letting your fears get the better of you. She has been here for years, and has done nothing but help people. After what she did to try to save my mother, and you would say that..."
"I'm sorry, I misspoke." Fenris looked uncertain, and Hawke had to remind himself of what Fenris had been through. Maker, why was he surrounded by broken people? Was it because he was broken himself? He needed a vacation.
"I understand, it's all right." Hawke sighed. "But please, I owe her a great deal. She pushed herself to the point of almost dying to help me, I can't just forget that. She also helps fight against the bad mages. Not all mages are bad..." He was reminded of what he and Anders were fighting about earlier, and how that was what Anders had said. Why were they judging mages based on the actions of a few?
"No, but mages are susceptible to corruption."
"So are men." Hawke said. "Do you think you're immune to such things? That's the quickest way to fall to it, is to think you're above it."
"Yes, but mages have powers that no other has."
"Should I not trust you, then? Your lyrium tattoos give you powers yourself..." Hawke put his hands on the elf's shoulders and looked him in the eye. "I care about you, Fenris, and I care about my friends who happen to be mages as well. I'm in a difficult position here, trying to protect this city, I'd prefer if my friends could at least trust each other. Is it not enough I trust them? Do you not trust my judgment?" Fenris furrowed his brow and looked away.
"I don't know." He said. "I... need to go." Hawke let his hands fall to his side and watched as the elf walked out the door, then cursed himself. Why did he have to care about him so much? There was no way Fenris could return his feelings, not when he sided even the slightest bit with the mages. Could he ever convince him that mages weren't all bad? Three years ago... it had only been three years and Hawke had changed so much. If only his sister could see him now... even when she'd been around, he'd supported the Templars, now he was questioning everything.
He didn't want to stop supporting them, but neither could he deny the abuses going on in the Circle. Even if it wasn't so bad in other cities, Kirkwall had a definite problem, and he needed to examine it thoroughly.
He walked over to the desk and leafed through the letters, then noticed one from the viscount asking him to come meet him. It would have to wait until the following morning, especially after that whole mess with the Qunari, the gas, and the Chantry messing everything up. He tossed the letter back down and went to his bed, flopping down. Baron, his dog, jumped up beside him and laid down, panting in his face.
"At least you'll always love me." Hawke laughed, petting the dog. "You never ask for anything but food and pats..."
"I'm worried about Hawke." Claire said while she was lying in bed with Anders. He nodded and rolled over to face her.
"You said something was coming, is it that?"
"No, it's more than that. Today, you two were fighting again, but at the castle, he... he seemed to close himself off. I'm not sure if he's going to try to go to the Templars, or if he's having trouble coming to terms with what I do... I don't know, I just know something is wrong and he needs someone to talk to."
"Are you suggesting I do that?" Anders sighed. "He'll just yell at me again."
"You have to be more understanding." She said. "I should probably talk to him. I'm the one who's causing all the problems I think. I mean, I'm making him question everything he knows just by existing."
"I'll at least come with you." He said. "I love you, and I don't want to see you get hurt."
"Hawke won't hurt me." She smiled. "He doesn't even think he can."
"Please, love, don't get cocky." He got up on his elbow and looked down at her. "I couldn't bear it if something were to happen to you again."
"I'll be careful, especially for you." She kissed him deeply, then grabbed him and rolled him over so she was on top. "I won't do anything to jeopardize this." He smiled and kissed her, running his hands up her bare back with a little electricity. She laughed, and doused the torches with her magic.
Hawke felt more like the walking undead as he made his way out of the Viscount's Keep, wishing the Blighted Qunari would just go away. If the viscount's son wanted to convert, then so be it. However, there wasn't anything wrong with making sure it was his own decision. He contemplated asking Fenris to go with him, but he felt his heart twinge with anxiety at the thought. After the way they'd left off... it would be better if Fenris approached him when he was ready. Instead, he went to the Hanged Man to see if Varric would come.
Isabela waved at him, and he nodded in return, but he knew she'd never go with him. Every time he'd asked, she'd flat out refused, made up some excuse, so he went straight for Varric instead of talking to her. However, when he saw Anders and Claire talking to Varric, he suddenly had second thoughts about even asking Varric. He didn't want to talk to them just yet, he still hadn't processed everything from the other day.
"Hawke!" Claire called to him, and he cringed. Putting on a smile he nodded.
"Claire, Anders, Varric, good to see you."
"What brings you here today, Hawke?" Varric asked.
"Well, it's actually about coming with me to talk to the Arishok again." Hawke said, noticing that Claire's eyes widened. "You know something, don't you? Justice said you know the future."
"Oh, he did?" Varric asked, grinning.
"Yes, he did, and I regret that." Anders said.
Claire shook her head. "It's all right, I knew this would come up sooner or later. Yes, Hawke, I do know something of what's going to happen... and that you must do it a certain way for the best results. What is it you need to speak to him about now?"
"Maker, you're... you cannot be human." Hawke stepped backwards, trying to figure her out.
"I am." She pouted. "Do you want me to help or not?"
"Fine, yes, but you don't make it easy to trust you." Hawke said. "The viscount's son has converted to the Qun, and I'm supposed to go make sure he did it on his own."
"Oh..." Claire grew frustrated and looked down. "This is..."
"What's wrong?" Anders asked.
"I'm trying to think." She snapped, then looked apologetically at Anders. "Sorry, this is a complex matter, and I'm trying to remember what I saw. I know the Chantry is involved, and it will end in a death tonight, though if you're here, that probably means it already happened."
"Seamus?" Hawke asked. Who else could it be? "They're using him... dammit, he must have converted of his own free will, and Petrice is going to use him to start a war with the Qunari!"
"Go, speak with the Arishok, but do not tell him what you know." Claire said. "This one will work itself out... though, what is your relationship with the Arishok? Are you on... relatively friendly terms with him?"
"I have tried to be diplomatic, yes." Hawke said. "I'm trying to keep the peace, but considering what you've said, it's not going to happen, is it? There's going to be a war."
"I'm sorry, Hawke." Claire said. "I didn't want you to find out. I can't control events, I only see glimpses of them and see different ways it could work out, but it's difficult to know for certain which way is the right way."
"Did you know about my mother?" Hawke asked, the sudden realization hitting him.
"She didn't, not in time." Anders said. "By the time she'd gotten anything about her, you were bursting into the clinic begging for our help. She did everything she could to save her, so you can't pin that on her." Hawke tried to calm himself down, but everything had been building up too much. He could leave while he had the chance...
"Hawke, why don't you sit down and have a drink?" Claire asked. He laughed, but it came out more like a sob.
"I suppose you can see what I'm about to do?" He asked.
"Any idiot can see you're having a hard time and need to talk." Her voice was soothing, but he couldn't trust her.
"Come on, Hawke, we care about you." Varric said. "You need to get it off your chest, and we're here to listen."
"And not judge." Claire quickly added.
"I know we don't agree on everything, but I hate to see you like this." Anders said. Hawke nodded and walked to the back of the room, sitting at the far end of the table, away from the door. Varric quickly poured him a drink and passed it, and Hawke drunk it down fast. He couldn't understand why they cared, after so many years...
"Tell me, Seer, what happens between me and Fenris?" He asked, using Varric's nickname for her. She looked surprised, her mouth open, unable to respond. "Do you even know?" He chuckled.
"That I have no idea about." She said. "Human relationships are tricky. I didn't even get into a relationship with Anders until the Blight started and I certainly hadn't seen that coming!"
"It was worth a shot." Hawke said. He'd just have to play it by ear and either give up or try something else.
"Just try to be supportive of him." Claire said. "You don't have to give up your ideals to try to understand his point of view and just be there for him. I don't know if he'll ever feel romantic interest in you, but it's worth a try."
"Thank you." Hawke said. "That wasn't what I came here to talk about, I was just seeing how much you knew, but thank you."
"What is bothering you, Hawke?" Anders asked. "It was obvious even yesterday that something was wrong." Hawke stared at the table and played with the cup between his hands.
"I'm not sure I'm ready to talk about it just yet." Hawke said. "It's... complicated. I should just go see the Arishok and get that out of the way before it gets too late. Varric, did you want to come?"
"Sure, I've got nothing better to do." Hawke stood up and set the cup down.
"I'll stop by the clinic later, after everything is done." He said, looking at Anders, then Claire. "Maybe tomorrow, depending on how things are."
"I'm sorry I'm not more help." Claire said. "I pray you find the guidance you need, and find comfort for your troubled mind." Disturbed by her words, he merely nodded and left. Why would she care? She barely hung around him at all, yet in some ways, she acted like she knew him. What did she see in his future then? What horrific incident did she see, outside of the war with the Qunari? He almost stopped to ask her, but decided he'd wait until he saw her next, after he'd had time to think about it.
Did he even want to know?