She Comes And Goes As She Pleases (Part 2)
by BrDPirateMan
"Thank you for the meal."
"You're… welcome."
Eri gathered up the dishes, offering to collect mine as well. I told her she didn't need to wash them up as I could do it, but she insisted. She was hovering around the kitchen sink cleaning up and spoke to me over her shoulder as she did. "I absolutely love your miso soup, Neku. You should become my own personal chef."
"Um… well, uh-huh…"
She huffed, "Geez, Neku. Were you always this uptight? What's with you? Lack of calcium?"
"I'm not angry or anything! But… when I told you to get dressed…"
She looked down at herself. "But I'm wearing a shirt. What's the problem?"
"That is the problem!" I spluttered. "You're wearing only a shirt! Why aren't you wearing any pants? !"
When she took a harder look at herself, only then did she seem – or pretend – to realize that what I said was true: she had no pants on, only a tight pair of lacy panties. I hated to admit it, but I wasn't strong-willed enough to tear my eyes away from her perky behind… So that's how all those low-slung mini-skirts she likes to wear stay on…
Eri didn't seem the least perturbed by her glaring lack of anything below the waist. In fact, she almost seemed to be laughing at me, as though it was nothing strange and that I was kicking up an unnecessarily big fuss.
"So?" she giggled.
I had to dig my knuckles into my thigh to try and reassert control over myself and my male urges. Any other day, the pain would have been unwelcome, here it was almost therapeutic. Anything to punish myself for being so unfaithful to Shiki! …Even though we weren't going out.
"Eri," I mumbled though gritted teeth, "every time you come here to stay overnight, you never dress properly… It's almost like you're doing it on purpose or something."
"Well, it can't be helped." She was doing the last of the plates. "It's really hot these days, and the last thing I want is to get my pants all soggy from sweat."
"Th-That doesn't explain why you've chosen to wear a shirt, though…"
"Oh, what's this now…" she chuckled, enjoying herself. "Is this a veiled request for me to take off my shirt too?"
I choked on my coffee. "N-No, that's not it! ! !"
Her laughter rang in the air as she finished up with the sink. She found the sight of me coughing and struggling with my scalded throat especially funny. "You're so cute when you get flustered like that, Neku. And that blush makes you even cuter."
"I'm not blushing," I protested, pounding my aching chest. "I'm not (cough) blushing."
She happened to glance at the kitchen clock hanging on the wall. "Oh, look at the time! I'll be late for class if I don't hurry!" The pitter-patter of her feet on the wooden floor was rapid as she scampered back and disappeared into the spare bedroom where she always slept when she spent the night at my place.
"Don't go out half-dressed," I called out, in my typical deadpan manner.
"I wouldn't!" she huffed. "What am I, some kind of pervert?"
Yes, you are…
Her strange behaviour was exasperating, yet somewhat amusing at the same time. Yes, she could be a real handful if she so chose it, but other times she could be quite tolerable, maybe even a little cute. Of course, I hasten to add that Shiki was the girl whom I was crazy about, not her. Still, despite being the mixed bag that she was – two parts weirdo, one part deviant – overall, she was quite a nice girl.
And so, such was yet another morning spent with Eri: fashion buff, prankster, near-nudist extraordinaire… and, believe it or not, friend.
XOXOXOXOXO
Every morning, Eri and I would take the bus to college, and like every other morning, we would get to talking during the five-minute journey. Our conversations were surprisingly engaging, so it rarely degraded into a one-way affair. She loved her fashion and I my art, but our differing interests were no obstacle to achieving great communication.
And her goofiness, silly as it may be, actually served to make things interesting. Her lack of delicacy – a trait I'd been witness to long enough – also kept things interesting, albeit in a different kind of way…
"My boyfriend and I are all SDLD right now!" she squealed.
"SDLD…?" I scratched the back of my neck in puzzlement. "Is that some kind of drug?"
"No, come on, get a grip. You know it means super-duper lovey-dovey! We do everything together!"
I took a playful jab at her, "Including crashing into people's homes to stay for the night?"
"How rude!" A hefty 'hmph' from her, and she carried on, "I may be like that but he isn't!"
"You sure have a thick cheek to be able to admit that so readily…"
"J-Just shut up and listen to me, Neku!" Then she continued to gush about her love life like the idiot she was. "Anyway, we do everything together! We're doing the same course, we go on dates… We spend hours making out…"
I gagged on my own saliva. "Um, yeah… Making out. Very interesting…"
"Are you listening, Neku? Oh, I bet you're busy thinking about Shiki again?"
"H-Huh? Wait, I really was listening…"
"No, you weren't!" she said accusingly. "I bet you were probably fantasizing about sharing a shower together with Shiki – " WHAP!
That was the sound of my hand slapping over her mouth. Everyone heard it and was looking our way. The blush on my face deepened to a frightening colour. How could she mention something like that in public? !
"Shut it, Eri!" I hissed. "That's crazy talk!"
She pushed my hand away. "But it's normal to imagine doing all sorts of things with the person you love, right?"
I couldn't bring myself to say anything. It was true that I loved Shiki to death, and Eri was painfully spot-on about me thinking of doing, well, this and that with her! But it was no good. My friendship with Shiki was weakening because we weren't getting in touch much. With our packed schedules, getting together for even a cup of coffee was impossible. She had her life and I had mine, and I feared that after so long we no longer matched. Dating her was a far-fetched dream, though I refused to stop chasing it.
Eri knew about my predicament, but I never turned to her for help in this matter because I thought it would be too awkward. At times she would, however, offer words of encouragement which I gratefully accepted. "You mustn't give up, Neku!" went one of her standout pieces of advice. "I'm sure she loves guys with hedgehog hairdos and bad fashion sense too!"
She nudged me in the arm and grinned widely. "Hey, keep on at it, Neku. Shiki's not dumb. She'll pick up on your pheromones sooner or later."
I managed a small smile for her. "Th-Thanks." Pheromones?
I was thinking about how, despite her obvious faults, Eri could be rather cool. She could almost be like another Shiki…
Wait… another Shiki? ! No, I didn't like Eri in that way…
But… why couldn't I stop thinking about her?
My train of thoughts came to a grinding halt when her college came into view and she had to alight. We bid each other goodbye for the day but before she stepped off the bus, much to my mortification, she called out to me for one final – though not as welcome – bunch of encouraging words:
"Don't be a quitter, Neku! I'm sure the day will come when you can take showers with Shiki!"
I froze in my seat as everyone glanced from her to me. All of this unwanted attention was unbearable. How I wished I could bury my face in the floor!
"Eri!" I spluttered. Man, was I mad at her!
But she just laughed and hopped off the bus, leaving everyone in a catatonic state of shock. Needless to say I had it worse. She really had a knack for putting people on edge whenever she's around…
XOXOXOXOXO
When was the last time I spent time with Shiki?
About a week before college life started for both of us, we had gone out for a movie and burgers. The whole time, everything seemed so happy and normal that I thought we could continue to do this as often as we wished in college. I had looked forward to seeing more of Shiki's smiles and hearing more of her gentle laughter in time to come.
But I was so naïve. When our worlds separated with the first semester, my despair grew with each time I offered to bring her out for tea or ramen, only to be told very regrettably that she had heaps of coursework to do. Having fun together became a thing of the past.
Shiki may be practically non-existent now, but Eri's always there to keep me company.
However, as one may already know, this wasn't necessarily a good thing!
When she's drunk she turns into a lecher and teases me to the point where I fear that she might rape me. When she's back to normal the next morning, she teases me about my shyness, and more often than not does something worse than the nonsense from the night before. Frankly, sometimes it's hard to tell when she drunk or sober.
A few days had passed since her last sleepover and this morning was to be another day in hell… or heaven?
"Hey Neku!" she cried, stepping out of the bathroom.
I was cooking breakfast as usual and glanced over my shoulder only to catch the shocking yet familiar sight of her in her underwear. But as she sashayed into the kitchen, tousling her damp hair with a towel, it was obvious that she didn't care.
"Wh-What do you need, Eri?" I said as normally as I could manage.
Any guy would kill to have a beautiful girl walk around his home wearing nada apart from a bra and panties, but in this cosy little apartment that was home, this was nothing new. Eri's a bit of an exhibitionist. It's ironic, though, because she's taking a course in fashion where she designs clothes that are meant to be worn, and she just flings hers all over the darn place.
"Neku, if it's not too much trouble, can you accompany me to Shibu-Q Heads tomorrow?"
"Why are you going there?" I asked out of curiosity.
"Shiki and I have succeeded in cranking out a whole bunch of designs," she replied. "We're just going to buy some cloth and stuff to make them. I'm not a pro at sewing so it's up to Shiki to help out with that."
Even merely hearing the name of the love of my life could cause my heart to shudder just like it did now. I was awfully curious but nevertheless I pulled myself together. "Why do you need me to come along?"
"We need someone to help carry all the material back to Shiki's house. Two girls can't possibly carry everything."
The breath hitched in my throat, not because of the prospect of having to lug around oodles of cotton, but because if Eri's words were to be counted on, then Shiki would be there and I could meet her!
"That sounds like a lot of cloth," I said, masking my growing excitement.
"It is." She perched her hip against the kitchen table, with the towel draped over her head like a scarf. "So we need your help."
Shiki was going on this shopping trip. At last! I could finally talk to her. Later when everything was done, I would take the initiative to arrange a dinner with her at some restaurant. During dinner, we could work a way around our schedules and if all went well, I would be looking at more dates with her down the road. This was going to be the best opportunity ever, and I'd be darned if I were to let this go!
I said yes. "I'll help."
"Great!" She took her seat at the table, ready to chow down. "I'll meet you outside of Shibu-Q Heads at 10 am tomorrow, then once we've gotten everything, we'll take all those things back to Shiki's place."
This was great! I had one day to prepare what I wanted to say to Shiki. I would get everything right and there would be no turning back. Shiki, here I come!
But, in the meantime…
"Got it, Eri, but… on another note…"
"Hmmm?"
"Could you at least wear something? It's kinda distracting."
"What? But I am wearing something."
"Underwear doesn't count," I grumbled. "Get dressed already!"
The twinkle in her narrowed eyes suggested that mischief would be afoot very soon. With a slow tigress-like drawl, she growled, "Hmmm… So underwear doesn't count, does it now?"
I gulped. I just knew something dreadful, something embarrassing would be around the corner. With her, this was almost a given. "What are you trying to pull now? ! Whatever it is, stop it."
She cocked her head to one side and lazily stroked her chin. "I'm just applying common logic to what you just said. I mean, if underwear isn't regarded as clothes like you so vehemently put it, then what you're saying is that I'm basically naked, even when I'm wearing underwear…"
"Um… and?"
"By that rationale, if I'm already naked, then whether or not I wear underwear or not doesn't really matter, does it? So I might as well take it off." To my horror, as she spoke, she turned her back to me, and now she was fiddling with the clasp of her bra. Such an indecent act, though an obviously playful one, scandalized me almost enough to blast the hair right out of my scalp… and I loved my hair.
"Hey! Wh-What're you doing? ! Are you nuts? !"
How thick her skin was to do stuff like this! She always teased me in this way… always! So it was only natural for me to fear that she might actually whip that off. But I couldn't just grab her hands and stop her; it'd be like sexual harassment. Wait a minute… wasn't that what she was doing? !
But she sure had a nice body… I couldn't deny that… And a girl like her stripping willingly in front of you wasn't something that happened every day. Striking the lottery was more common than this.
No! Focus! Think of Shiki!
I cried one more time, "Seriously, stop it, you idiot!"
She pretended to sound cross as she spoke over her shoulder, "Is that the proper way to talk to a girl?"
Eri wasn't a girl. With the way she behaved, she seemed more like a dirty old man. Girl, my foot! But I didn't want to incur her wrath today. And most importantly, I just wanted her to put on some damn clothes already. Looking at her in such a state of undress was like ogling, and it was killing both my pride and my conscience!
No choice but to suck it up. As I attempted to negotiate with her, I tried to minimize eye contact with that skimpy navy blue bra on her luscious toned back. But with an unfortunate overdose of hormones it was very very hard. I could turn my head away, but my eyes just followed and stayed locked on.
"Look, Eri," I coughed uneasily, "I'm sorry for that outburst. I'm sorry I called you an idiot. But I'm this close to having a nosebleed right now and you're not helping matters."
She cut in before I could finish. "A nosebleed? Then be thankful you're a normal guy. It'd be more worrying if you couldn't get one…"
"Argh… At least wear a shirt or something!"
Her fingers stayed stubbornly on the clasp, tweezing it but keeping it firmly locked. "Begging and kowtowing and offering to be my dog is nice and all, but – "
"Y-Your dog? !"
"– I'm not so cruel. If you say a nice little 'please', I may consider. On the other hand, watching you collapse in a pool of blood is pretty funny, so I don't know… What should I do…"
"PLEASE!"
"Don't shout like that. It's very… ungentlemanly. Try again."
"Please?"
"Hmmm… Not bad, I guess, but it still sounds insincere."
RRRGH! My blood was boiling and I was seething. This girl was playing me for a fool and she loved it! I wanted to toss her out the window and leave her out in the open in just her underwear. Then we'll see just how much she loves walking around half-naked!
Alas, that was merely a figment of my imagination and reality was still reality. I felt like and was a total idiot. And like the idiot that I was, I capitulated to her mischievous demands.
"Please."
She gave a satisfied huff of someone who's had enough fun for one day. "Hee hee… that'll do for now. Very well, I'll go get changed."
"Oh, thank god," I sighed, slumping onto the floor. "Please do so. Now. Ugh."
I felt like a pile of goo as I sat there on the floor tending to my dizzy spinning head. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed that she was still at where she stood and had yet to go back to her bedroom to change. No chicken brains were needed to tell me she was standing there, all haughty and laughing and pleased with herself for turning me into a fool. "That's right, no one messes with Eri!" must have been the message she was trying to deliver to me. I was sure she wanted to tease me some more or something.
Nothing bad happened, however, which came as a pleasant surprise to me. All she did was say, in a very nice and normal manner, "Sorry, Neku, I can't help it. You're too cute when you're nervous. But regarding Shiki, just hang in there, okay? You just need to keep the pressure on, and she'll notice. And tomorrow's your best chance."
I noted the kindness in her words and nodded silently. She was right. All the nosebleed nonsense aside, I was surprised that she knew what I was thinking. Yes, I should be keeping the pressure on. Hounding Shiki day and night! Well, not really, of course…
"And when the day comes when you two are a couple," added Eri, "treat me to lunch as a reward, 'kay? I love free lunches."
This helped me to cheer up, though I still couldn't look at her out of embarrassment. "I guess that's fine with me…"
"Awesome! Now, how about a hug between friends to seal the deal? Yeah? And…"
"Hug? Eri, no, wai– !"
"…BEAR HUG!"
Too late. In a flash, she swooped down like a vulture, wrapped her arms around me and pulled me in for an extra-tight embrace. I might have been glad to return it on any day, but my face ended up squashed deeply into her bosom.
Soft and tender… My entire head was literally wrapped up in a little slice of heaven… I was more than ready to let loose with the nosebleed at this point but there was something more worrying I had to deal with first: I couldn't breathe! Any attempts to squirm my way out ended in failure. She must have thought I was being shy and averse to hugs so she decided to teach me a lesson: that hugs were good. So she hugged me even tighter, sealing my doom.
As I suffocated slowly and the blackness of certain death overwhelmed me, I could just about make out her squealing but muffled voice.
"You're too huggable for words, Neku! That's so cuuuute! …Huh? Neku? Are you alri– Huh… Y-You're dead? !"
Marshmallows are nice and all, but… I was allergic to them.
I had to remain strong! Tomorrow's shopping trip was going to be a blast, I was so sure of it! Shiki and I would be back to the awesome way we were before college!
But tomorrow would not go the way I had planned… No, not because Eri had killed me – I had merely fainted – but because of something else. And it wouldn't be pretty.