Pairing: Sirius/Hermione

Prompt:

"Merry Christmas! I'm your present!"

"Can I have the receipt?"

Bows and Receipts

Sirius tries to surprise Hermione on Christmas but fails.

When Sirius heard the front door open, he grinned as he tightened the gigantic red bow around his naked body and sprinted towards the giant Christmas tree in the living room. Crawling under it, he positioned himself so that he wasn't facing the door.

When he heard the footsteps come closer to the tree, he chose that moment to speak. "Hey, beautiful," Sirius called out. "Merry Christmas! I'm your present this year!"

There was absolute silence for a moment, and Sirius frowned, confused as to why Hermione wasn't saying anything. He peeked out from beneath the branches and his eyes widened with horror.

Remus stood there with disbelief evident on his face. "Can I have the receipt? Because I really don't want this present," he said, a huge grin forming on his face at the hilarious sight in front of him.

"Moony!" Sirius cried, trying to cover himself by ducking under the branches. "What are you doing here? You weren't supposed to be here till six!"

"I know you enjoyed my company, but I didn't know you wanted me like that," Remus teased as he walked towards the couch to sit down. "No offence, mate, but I'm not interested."

Sirius scowled at him from his spot and said, "You're not supposed to be here! Damn it, Remus, I had this whole surprise planned for my girl, and now—"

"Who is this girl, anyway? You haven't bragged about her either, so should I think she's not that good-looking?" Remus teased, and Sirius glared at him as he began to crawl out from under the tree.

"Hey, my girl is absolutely gorgeous, all right?" Sirius snapped, trying to untangle his hair from the prickly branch. "Could you leave now? I don't want her to get embarrassed when she sees you here."

"Come on, Padfoot! Introduce me to her! I want to see who this girl is that you're so protective of," Remus said, leaning back. "It's the first time you're so serious about someone, and I want to meet her. See if she's good enough for you and whatnot."

Sirius dragged himself out and Accioed his cloak, wrapping it around his shoulders. "I'm the one who's not good enough for her, Moony. But I love her, you know… She's just… amazing! She's so smart and beautiful and has a weird sense of humour, and she's so kind and generous and has such a big heart — she's practically perfect in every way. I'm thinking of asking her to marry me tonight, too."

Remus was stunned by Sirius' announcement, never having seen him so in love with someone before. The woman who had stolen his friend's heart must be something really special.

He was about to say something to him, but the two men heard the front door open. With his superior werewolf senses, Remus sensed it was Hermione who had arrived. What's she doing here? Dinner's at six, isn't it?

Sirius paled when Hermione called out, "Sirius, are you home? I got your note! Are you okay?"

A Lumos went off in Remus' head at her words, and he audibly gasped. He whirled around and gaped at Sirius with disbelief. "Hermione? Really, Sirius? Does Harry know? He's going to kill you!"

Sirius was about to answer, but Hermione entered the living room. She stopped when she caught sight of Remus on the couch. She looked at Sirius and blurted out, "Why are you wearing a cloak? Are you going outside?"

Remus smirked as he said, "Oh, no, he's not going outside. He was just planning something for his lady love, and I interrupted him."

"L-lady love?" Hermione glanced at Sirius with worry, and he sighed and nodded slowly. "Remus, we…"

"Oh, I'm not mad, Hermione," Remus said, shaking his head. "I'm a bit disappointed that you two didn't want to tell me, but I'm not mad. Harry, on the other hand, will be furious when he finds out you two didn't bother to tell him."

Hermione nibbled on her lower lip. "It's not that we didn't want to tell anyone… It's just that this"–she motioned to Sirius and her–"happened only a few weeks ago."

Remus looked at Sirius pointedly, wondering if he had lost his mind. Sirius wanted to propose to her after only a few weeks of dating? "So, this isn't anything serious, then?" he asked, staring at Sirius.

"It is," Hermione confirmed, nodding her head. She walked over to Sirius' side and took his hand. "I'm not ashamed of him if that's what you're wondering."

When Remus saw the absolute love evident in Sirius' eyes and the way Hermione gazed down at him, he knew whatever it was between them would always be there. He smiled as he stood up and said, "Very well, then. Congratulations to the both of you — and Pads... good luck. Tell me everything later."

"Thanks, mate!" Sirius beamed at Remus as he stood up, his cloak accidentally revealing his naked thighs, and Hermione burst into peals of laughter.

"You're naked underneath!" she cried, covering her mouth with her hands.

"And I saw something I wish I could Obliviate," Remus teased, winking at Hermione, and ran out of the room before Sirius could start whining and complaining.

As he shut the door behind him, Remus smiled and thought, 'Wow, Sirius Orion Black is getting engaged — hopefully. That's nothing less than a Christmas miracle.'

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