A/N- Good to see you all are hanging in there! Despite hours of editing, I'm still finding some small errors, so I apologize for that! Also, a few of you are curious about Emily's romantic future... more will come on this in the next 3-4 chapters. I was struggling with chapter splits and since you all were kinder than I thought to poor Sam, I chose to make this chapter longer than the rest. It's also got some fluff built in after all of the drama we've had as of late. Hope you enjoy!

—

Ava Rivers' arrival had been the highlight of the Fall for everyone in Rosewood. Hanna loved her son and daughter equally, but it was no secret that since the day she had gone to the hospital and held Lily and Grace for the first time, she knew that she wanted a baby girl. She was excited to spoil the her tiny girl with hugs, kisses, and every designer onesie that she could make or get her hands on. She also was determined to raise her daughter to be a strong and self-confident woman- something that had taken her a few years to learn herself. It was a trait that her little girl would have plenty of role models for as she grew up.

Emily spent a lot of her free time at the Rivers' house, helping Hanna and letting the twins see Ava. Lily and Grace were obsessed with the new baby. They were fairly close in age to Aidan and Aria's daughter, Katherine, so this was the first time that they were able to touch and hold a small baby. Emily got a kick out of taking her daughters to visit and watching them stare at the tiny baby as if they were mesmerized by her.

There were plenty of gatherings at Hanna's house in Rosewood in the weeks following Ava's birth. One Saturday, there was a full roster of visitors: Emily, Alison, the twins, Spencer, and Toby, and they all spent the day hanging out and catching up. While the children played in the backyard with Caleb and Toby, the girls decided to FaceTime Aria, who was in California.

Aria and Ezra had originally settled in Rosewood after getting married and were finally able to adopt a baby girl about two years ago. Aria's solo writing career had really taken off, and when their baby was six months old, the Fitz family had bought a house in California to be close to the movie production of Aria's book. Aria did her best to keep in touch with her friends and usually came back to Rosewood to visit them and her family a few times a year.

The video popped up and the four girls waved hello as their friend came into focus.

"Hey guys!" Aria waved with Katherine on her lap. They all said their hellos, but it didn't take long for the inevitable demand of "Let me see the baby!"

Alison was holding a sleepy Ava in her arms and Hanna walked the phone over so that Aria could see the baby. Just like everyone else, Aria gushed over the sight and told Hanna how happy she was for her and Caleb. The girls chatted with her for awhile before Aria asked to say hello to the boys and the kids. Spencer and Hanna walked outside with the phone, leaving Alison and Emily in the room with Ava.

Emily walked over and sat on the arm of the club chair that Alison was sitting in. The blonde had hardly noticed as she was looking down at the new baby, intently studying her tiny features. She stared at the newborn's face, running the back of her fingers across Ava's smooth cheek. She thought back to when the twins were that small, and she couldn't help as the flashbacks of the early days with Lily and Grace filled her mind.

"Brings back some memories, huh?" Emily smiled down at Alison and the baby.

Watching Alison hold a newborn made her feel things that she refused to admit to herself that she was feeling. Emily could still vividly picture Alison holding their own babies in the nursery at the house. They'd both spent probably more than a thousand hours in that nursery with the twins during their first year. They'd watch them in their cribs together while the babies slept, amazed that something so perfect had come out of something so horrible.

Alison looked up at the brunette with a soft smile and nodded. "It feels like so long ago that Grace and Lily were this small," she said and cuddled Ava a little closer.

"Does it?" Emily asked, "It feels like yesterday to me."

She felt hypnotized by the sight in front of her. Alison looked beautiful and perfect holding the baby and Emily had to keep reminding herself that this was not four years ago. They weren't together. This wasn't their baby.

Alison peered at Emily and noticed how spellbound she looked. She assumed that Emily was looking at the baby, not the sight of her with the baby. "Do you want to hold her?" She asked, lifting the newborn slightly.

Emily shook her head, "I get to hold her all the time," she reached down and ran a finger across Ava's tiny button nose, "you enjoy."

"I love watching Lily and Grace interact with her," Alison commented, "They're so good with her". Today had been the first time that Alison had seen their daughters with Ava and she was impressed at how well they held her and how gentle they were.

"Well they've been asking about a sibling... Hanna says that they can borrow Ava as theirs now. Apparently Aidan isn't too fond with the idea of sharing his parents yet," Emily laughed.

"Hm," Alison mused, bringing her attention back to the baby. The twins had never said anything to her about wanting a sibling. She let her mind wonder briefly about what that could be like years in the future. Who out of her and Emily would have another child? And with who? She didn't like to think about a future where their family of four eventually included other people that Alison didn't know yet.

It was quiet for a few minutes as both girls stayed sitting close to each other watching the baby.

"What are you thinking about," Alison whispered.

The brunette was thinking about a lot of things. For some reason, the day that the girls were born kept running through her head.

It had been an incredibly stressful day for Emily. She was at the pool coaching morning practice when Alison had called her to tell her that her water broke. She'd prefaced the conversation with 'don't freak out', when of course Emily was going to freak out. She had been on hyperdrive about the safety of the babies from day one. There had obviously been the question of AD and whether or not there was any kind of nefarious plan for the babies.. but Emily would have been a nervous wreck regardless. Alison had tried to remain calm when they drove to the hospital and got her checked her in. After thirteen hours of intense labor, their doctor had told her that it was time to push and then it was her turn to freak out. They'd gone through birth and delivery classes, but when it actually came time, Alison lost her cool and started crying that she didn't think that she could do it. Emily knew that she could and had talked her through it the entire time. She wiped at her forehead, coached her on, and let Alison say every terrible word in the books as she squeezed the life out of Emily's right hand. The result was beautiful. Emily would never forget watching Alison hold their newborns after they were born. It was a memory that would be etched in her brain forever. She had never been more in love with Alison than she was at that exact moment.

Emily stayed quiet for a few moments before finally telling her that she was thinking about the day that their daughters were born. Alison held her gaze for a beat and then looked back down at Ava. Emily could tell that she was smiling because she could see the indents in her cheeks from her dimples.

Alison was brought back to her own memories of that day. She remembered the nurse placing Lily into her arms minutes after she'd given birth. The little girl had squirmed around, adjusting to the feeling of being held and then opened her eyes for the first time. It amazed Alison. As she stared into her daughter's eyes, all that she could see was Emily. She'd looked over at her girlfriend sitting in the chair next to her, holding their other daughter who was crying as loud as her little lungs would let her. Alison could remember closing her own eyes for a beat as her heart swelled because at that moment, it felt like all of the pain from over the years had been worth it. She had finally gotten her family.

Alison tore her eyes from baby Ava and returned her gaze up to Emily. Neither of them said anything as they silently shared the memory. They had experienced the best day of their lives together and they didn't need words to relieve it together now.

The moment ended when they heard footsteps approaching as Hanna and Spencer returned to the room, apparently finished with the call to Aria.

Emily cleared her throat and stood up from where she was perched by Alison. "Everything good with Aria?" She asked.

"Yeah," Hanna answered, "sounds like she'll be here for Thanksgiving." She walked back into the kitchen in an attempt to finish getting lunch together to take to the kids outside.

"Can I hold her?" Spencer asked Alison, motioning towards the baby. Alison carefully passed Ava over, immediately missing the little ball of warmth in her arms.

Spencer took her turn to dote on the baby. As she watched their friend, Alison couldn't help but wonder if Spencer ever got sad being around babies because of what happened to her two years ago. She knew that it had to cross her mind, but it wasn't something that Alison ever talked to Spencer about. She knew that the other girl was in a good place now, but couldn't help but feel guilt that everything had gone on while Alison was away in Oregon dealing with her own drama. Emily's cell phone rang across the room, interrupting her thoughts.

Emily crossed over to grab it, and noted the name on the caller ID- Kaya. She knew that she couldn't have this conversation here, so she chose to step out.

Alison heard her utter a soft, "Hey," as Emily walked out of the living to take the call and narrowed her eyes in the direction of her voice. She wished that she could ignore the feeling, but couldn't help where her mind went right away. Alison had heard Emily answer the phone when Pam called probably a million times, and she never greeted her that way. So who was she talking to?

Spencer noted the expression and spoke to her to break her thoughts, "Sooo," she looked up from the baby, "You never told me how everything ended up the other night after I left dinner."

It was a statement, but the question was clear. Alison had texted her later that night after she'd gotten in and settled to

let her know that she had made it home safe, but never elaborated beyond that. A part of her had been annoyed that Spencer had left her there trying to make something happen, but she was also conflicted because in the end she wound up having a nice time. She hadn't wanted to admit to Spencer her uncertainties with moving on and was slightly embarrassed that she screwed up the goodnight kiss and probably made things awkward. It had been over a week and she hadn't seen or heard from Sam, but then again they hadn't exchanged numbers.

"It was good," Alison told her simply, hoping that the brunette wouldn't press her on it.

No such luck, this was Spencer after all. "So what happened?" She asked.

"We had another drink. Talked." The blonde paused and shrugged, "He took me home".

"Anything else?"

"Nosey much?" Alison snapped back. Maybe if she stalled someone else would walk in and the conversation could die. It didn't.

"Come on, I'm married. My love life is boring. Let me live through you."

Alison rolled her eyes, "I don't have a love a life for you to live through"

"Well whose fault is that?" Spencer smarted.

Alison looked around to make sure that no one was in earshot. She wasn't trying to be sneaky, but she also didn't want her daughters or Emily to hear anything.

"We kissed, okay?" She divulged, keeping her voice low.

Spencer's eyes lit up, "I knew it!"

"Quiet!" Alison scolded. She shook her head, "Anyway, I don't think that anything is going to come of it so..."

"You don't want anything to happen?" Spencer asked.

Alison shrugged, "I don't know. It doesn't matter anyway because I'm pretty sure I scared him off."

"What did you do?" Spencer asked.

Alison knew that it was less accusatory and more because when she was reluctant to something that she could be cold or snarky, though that hadn't been the case with Sam after Spencer left. She hesitated, feeling a little bit embarrassed about how she had reacted after the kiss. If she wasn't sure, she shouldn't have kissed him. She had been so much more confident when she was a teenager. Now, she just felt out of practice and it made her self-conscious.

"I kind of freaked out after the kiss," she finally said, shaking her head at her own own actions.

Spencer scrunched up her nose sympathetically. "Well... that's okay. There will always be more."

And she was right, but Alison didn't really know how to get out there and date. She didn't know if she even wanted to. She did wish that she had another chance at the door-side conversation, though. It could have gone down much differently.

"I just don't know what I want," she confessed.

"That's okay," Spencer offered her a kind smile, which was rare for their friendship. "No one is telling you what to do and I'm sorry if I was pressuring you before you were ready. I just think even if you don't want anything serious it wouldn't be bad to have something for yourself. You don't have to jump into anything." Hanna had told Spencer months ago that she'd had a similar conversation with Emily. It wasn't so much that they wanted to force the girls to start seeing other people, but the truth was that Alison and Emily were divorced... and they all had to move on. They wanted their friends to be happy and they knew that moving on from their marriage was part of that process.

The kids walked into the room a few moments later, filling the silence with little chatter. Lily and Grace immediately walked over to Spencer to look at Ava more. It was amusing to Alison how obsessed they were with the new baby.

Aidan tapped her leg and she looked down at the small boy. Aidan had been born when Lily and Grace were eleven months old. Alison had been around for the first year of his life and she still felt close to him. He was a curious toddler with big brown eyes, light brown hair, and tons of energy.

"Can I have juice?" He asked Alison.

"Sure, buddy," she scooped him up and carried him towards the kitchen.

As she entered the kitchen, she overheard Hanna and Caleb in there and caught the tail end of the conversation.

"Was Emily outside on the phone?" Hanna asked.

"Yeah," Caleb chuckled, "It sounded like an episode of that bachelorette show that you watch out there."

Alison stood in the doorway and studied them for a minute before they noticed her presence. She forced a smile onto her face, "Your son would like some juice," she told them, placing Aidan back on the ground.

Following that day, Alison thought more about what it was that she really wanted and where her hesitations were. She had eventually stepped out of her comfort zone when she was in Beacon Heights and opened herself up to the possibility of finding someone else. What was different about here?

She'd been avoiding the question because she knew the answer. It was hard to move on when she was this close to Emily. It wasn't so much that she sat around all day and pined for the other girl. She didn't. It was just that her life here was centered so much on her daughters and at the end of the day, Emily was a part of that. She saw her multiple times a week, talked to her on the phone for the girls' story time almost every night, and listened to the girls recount stories involving their Mama all the time. Realistically, she understood that there wasn't anything romantic between them, but to go in the other direction and have something romantic with someone else just felt wrong for some reason.

But Spencer had also made a good point that day at Hanna's house. Maybe Alison needed something for herself. Everyone in Rosewood was connected to Emily and it was rare that she had a conversation with any of her friends and the other girl's name didn't get brought up. Maybe it was time leave the bubble- it sure seemed like that was what Emily had been doing.

In the end, she decided to open herself up to the possibility of something and see what would happen. When she saw Sam passing out flyers in her building for his second lecture of the semester, she pulled him aside. She invited him over to her house for dinner, and he accepted. It turned out that she hadn't scared him away. He had wanted to give her space and she was grateful for that because it allowed her that time to think.

Alison was glad that she made the decision to make a new friend because it really did help to have something for herself. They didn't go out on the weekends because Alison had the twins, but they started to see each other once or twice a week. She had to admit that it was refreshing to have another adult to confide in and socialize with. Sometimes they went out to dinner, sometimes they watched a movie at her place, sometimes they kissed, sometimes they just talked, and eventually they slept together. She was clear with him from the beginning that she wasn't looking for anything serious, and he was agreeable to that- or so he said. Getting out and away from the bubble of Rosewood and her past felt like she was adding another piece necessary in the puzzle of moving on.

Back in Rosewood, Emily was trying to balance her own life. She had slowed down with dating recently because she had been so busy. When November hit, the RHS Swim Team's season began and she found herself without much free time at all during the week. She was starting to feel like she rarely had time to spend with her daughters after teaching during school hours and coaching in the evening. Her time with them was limited to the mornings, the hour in between school and coaching and the hour between coaching and bed. It was starting to wear on her morale. She missed them during the weekends and despite Alison's increased communication, she felt herself wanting more time with them. The part of her that sometimes resented Alison was starting to bubble up.

But the difference now, after they'd spoken about this in therapy, was that she was able to recognize the feeling and knew that there were healthy ways that she could address it. One Saturday when she and Alison were on the phone after the girls went to bed and Alison was complaining about the twins behavior that day, Emily caught herself before she said anything that she regretted. She recognized herself feeling resentful and while she couldn't help the way that she felt, she knew now that there might be ways that she could make it better instead of worse.

A few weeks before Thanksgiving, she had called Alison to see what they could do about it.

"You're calling late," Alison said, sensing that something might be up. Emily rarely needed to call her after the girls were in bed so when she saw her name pop up on the log at 9:00 on a Wednesday night, she knew it might be important.

"Yeah, I'm sorry," Emily apologized, "You're not in bed yet, are you?".

Alison shook her head despite the fact that Emily couldn't see, "I'm just doing some reading. What's up?"

Emily hesitated. She knew that she had to be careful with how she brought this up. They'd discussed in their therapy session that they could have open lines of communication even if they had something negative to say- they just had to avoid certain triggers.

"I was hoping we could talk... I've been having some issues lately." She started.

Alison was quiet on the other end. She knew that there was a reason that she had a bad feeling when she picked up. She tried to stay calm, but her heart started beating faster. She racked her brain to try to think about what the issues could have been. She hadn't had any problems with the girls lately that she could remmember. She wondered briefly if word had gotten back that she was casually seeing someone. She really hoped that wasn't why Emily was calling, she didn't think she could have that conversation tonight, or ever, really.

"Okay... what's been going on?"

Emily hesitated one more time before coming out with it. Talking about her feelings was hard, but she knew that it was better than them coming to light in a negative way down the line. This way she had control over the narrative and could paint the picture of how she was feeling and hope that Alison could sympathize.

"I've been.. I've been really missing the girls lately."

"Lily and Grace? What do you mean?"

"Well, swimming started a couple of weeks ago and you know what my schedule is like during Rosewood's swim season…" Emily told her. Alison knew- she'd been with Emily through a few of those seasons and had seen how demanding it was of her time.

"I guess you aren't spending much time with them during the week," Alison deducted.

"Just a couple of hours.. and not really the most ideal times. I feel like I'm not really getting to bond with them." She confessed sadly, "I just get them out of bed, feed them, and then put them to bed. Then when I actually have free time on the weekends, they're with you".

Alison took the information in. She knew Emily's schedule, but truthfully had been so busy herself that she never stopped to think about what that meant for Emily's time with the girls. When Alison was moving back, they hadn't stopped to consider the seasonal changes in their schedules when they'd made this arrangement.

She could see that it was a little unfair to Emily to have to do all of the work during the week and then not get to have any fun with them on the weekends. Still though, Alison only got the girls for two days a week, and Emily had them for five.

"I get it. I mean my schedule is pretty similar to yours during the week right now, so I get what it's like to be busy. I know you work really hard during the week." She wasn't really sure what they would do about it though. They couldn't flip flop and have the girls live with Alison during the week. It would be too much with her demanding schedule. Plus Pam babysat during the afternoons, so the girls needed to stay in Rosewood for that.

It was hard to suck it up and say the words, but Emily pushed herself, "Can you think of any way that I can see them more," she asked, "Like on the weekends?" She bit her lip after asking and winced. She knew that it was asking a lot and she hoped that Alison didn't think that she was trying to steal her time away.

"Um…" She wanted to tell her that the weekends with the twins were the best part of her life. That they were what she spent the whole week looking forward to. But she knew that Emily had a point. She just needed some time to think about it and not give and emotional answer that she may or may not regret. "Can I sleep on it and follow up with you tomorrow?" She had asked.

Emily had gone to bed that night consumed with worry. Was she asking for too much? They had both agreed on the terms of when they would see the girls and it wasn't Alison's fault that Emily's schedule was this way during swim season. She hoped that she hadn't pissed the blonde off. Things were going well again between them and she didn't want to derail it, but she also couldn't help how she was feeling. They had agreed that they could be honest with each other about their struggles and how they were feeling, so she knew that being upfront about it was the right thing to do.

In the end, Alison had called back the next day, and was more than receptive of her request. The blonde confessed that while she wanted to see the girls during the weekends, she wanted to make sure that Emily was getting her time with them as well. They got to talking and realized that with swimming, the holidays, and school breaks that they could have a more fluid schedule. Alison agreed to let Emily have the girls every other weekend during swim season and in return, Emily was letting the girls spend additional time staying with Alison during the month break that she had between semesters. Emily was proud of them for being able to work together to find a solution without any major drama.

—

When Thanksgiving came, it seemed like everyone might be in a good place for the first tine in a long time. Over the years, the girls and their families had made it a tradition to get together during the holidays. By this point, they had all become one large family, both because of the circumstances that they had all dealt with over the last decade and also because of the love and comfort that they felt with eachother. If there had been any good to come out of their experiences over the years it was the bond that everyone shared that had turned them from friends to family.

They usually switched hosts each holiday throughout the years and this year, Pam had offered to host everyone for Thanksgiving dinner. It was a huge crowd. Emily and the twins were there so Alison had been invited, she assumed, by default. Hanna and Caleb came over, along with their two children and Ashley Marin. Spencer and Toby drove in from Philly, though the rest of the Hastings were staying in DC as they sometimes did. Aria had been able to fly in with her daughter Katherine, however it turned out that Ezra had to stay in California. The other Montgomery's were visiting Mike, who had moved to Florida the year before. Even Jason DiLaurentis had made it. It was a full house and with four small children and a new baby, the day got chaotic at times, but everyone seemed to enjoy themselves.

At one point during dinner, Emily looked around the table at her family and friends. Caleb and Toby were engaged in an animated conversation across the table. Toby's eyebrows were peaked with his blue eyes open wide and she wondered what Caleb must have said to shock him that badly. Ashley Marin was holding Ava and Pam sat next to her as they both swooned over the cute month old baby. Katherine sat between Spencer and Aria and the two women tried to explain pilgrims and turkeys to the toddler who kept laughing hysterically and repeating, 'Tukkky'. The table was loud and boisterous, and the energy radiating off of it warmed Emily's heart.

And then there was her own family. She and Alison sat on either side of their daughters. She peered over at the other women who listening intently to Lily tell her everything that they had learned in school about the first Thanksgiving. Alison would raise her eyebrows at every fact Lily spouted, uttering 'Really?' and 'No way', egging the little girl on and sending her into fits of giggles. She smiled to herself at the sight and Alison looked over their daughters heads at her with a head tilt and an amused expression. Emily was caught getting sentimental, but she didn't really care.

"Hurry, Mama!" Grace whined, patting her leg. Emily grimaced, realizing that she had gotten totally side tracked from cutting Grace's turkey for her.

"Whoops sorry!" She apologized and moved to finish getting the plate set.

Grace wasn't super phased, she tapped Emily's leg again, "Why doesn't the turkey eat on Thanksgiving?"

Emily stopped cutting and looked at her daughter with utter confusion. What in the world, where did that come from?

Lily abruptly stopped talking to Alison and spun around, "Cause he's already stuffed!" She yelled.

Alison laughed at the exchange and turned to her brother. He shot her an innocent look, but she knew that he was probably the source of that joke. "You're going to get kicked out if you keep it up with the corny jokes," she teased him.

"Hey! I'm an uncle.. we're absolutely allowed to tell Dad-Jokes," he defended with a silly seriousness.

Aria and Spencer, chuckled from across the table at them. Katherine looked around the adults and pointed to the turkey in the middle of the table and announced, "The tukkky stuffed!"

"See," Jason looked pointedly at Alison and smiled over at Aria, "She gets it".

Alison shook her head as she huffed out a laugh. She was feeling similar to Emily. Having their friends and family in one place again made her feel the type of comfort that she had been desperate for just a year ago when things were a mess in Beacon Heights. She thought back to her nerves back in June as she moved back. She would have never thought that things could be this good. Not only were she and Emily in a good place, but their girls seemed happy, her semester had been a success so far, and she actually had a social life of her own in Rosemont. She hoped more than anything that she wasn't in for a crash now that things were good.

Later after everyone had finished eating, Hanna, Spencer, and their families headed home. The others hung around the house, cleaning and keeping the kids entertained. Eventually, Alison made her way toward the living room when she saw Aria standing in front of the window looking outside. She had a small smile on her face, but Alison thought she looked pensive. Jason and Emily were outside with the kids playing keep away with a soccer ball as Lily, Grace, and Katherine chased all around them trying to get it. Emily looked up and took note of Alison at the window. She waved to her to come out with them, but Alison snorted out a laugh and shook her head. She was wearing heels, no way was she going to go play on the grass.

"You two seem to be doing well," Aria commented, turning to face her.

Alison nodded, "We're at a good place right now."

"How do you do it?" The shorter girl asked.

"Do what?"

"I mean you guys were in a pretty rough place when you got divorced. Now it's like co-parenting goals," she complimented.

"I wouldn't go that far," Alison laughed, "but it's nice to be able to spend holidays like this together."

"I bet…" Aria trailed off, looking back outside. Something seemed off, but before Alison could say anything else, she heard Pam say her name in the kitchen.

Alison felt like a sergeant was calling her to order and she quickly excused herself and walked towards the voice. She always felt nervous around her former mother-in-law. They'd spoken earlier when Alison, along with everyone else, had thanked Pam profusely and complimented her on the dishes, but she hadn't been alone with the other woman all day- as a matter of fact, she hadn't seen her much throughout the Fall season because she'd been so busy in Rosemont.

Pam was packing up the leftover food and held out two containers to Alison when she walked into the room.

"I saved some leftovers for you so that you would have an easy meal for the girls over the weekend," she told her with a small smile. "I put some extra desert in there too… they really seemed to like the chocolate pie." She placed the tupperware into a brown bag.

"They seem to like anything chocolate." Their grandmother was always spoiling them with sweets. Alison realized, though, that she didn't have the girls this weekend. It was one of the weekends that Emily was going to keep them. "Actually, Lily and Grace be here this weekend, so you might just have Emily take it."

Pam stopped what she was doing and looked back at the blonde with constricted brows, "Why is that?" she placed a hand on her hip.

Alison knew what it probably looked like to the other woman- that she was dipping out of Mom-duties already. Part of her was offended at the implication, but then again she understood the worry.

"Emily told me that she's been missing them with her being so busy during the week. She's going to keep them some weekends so that they can do some fun things together," she explained, pushing her lips into a small smile. She had been willing to make the adjustment, reasoning that it was only fair, but she found herself missing them too now when they didn't come on Fridays.

"Oh," Pam was surprised, "I didn't know that." Alison nodded again to confirm, feeling a little bit awkward that she had been the one to break the news and not Emily. "Is that what you want too?" The older woman asked.

It was rare to have an actual conversation with Emily's mom. They hadn't made it past small talk in months. She was surprised that Pam actually asked cared what her opinion was.

"I want all of us to be happy," Alison shrugged, "and that can't happen if Emily isn't happy." That was one way that she rationalized it the night that she had thought the situation over after Emily had called. Some of Alison's happiness would be taken away, but if it was going to Emily, it was worth it. Plus she justified, "I'll have plenty of time to see them during the week once the semester is over. I don't don't start back up again until mid-January".

Pam nodded, taking in the new information. She stared at Alison for a few moments, looking thoughtful. "You know, I was planning to spend a day baking Christmas cookies with the girls next month. They weren't much help last year, but I think now that they're a little older they will understand more."

Alison smiled, the girls were always asking her to bake with them, partially because they seemed to have an obsession with sweets. "I bet they'll love that."

"You could join too," the older woman raised a brow, actually looking hopeful that Alison would take her up on the invitation. The blonde stared back for a moment, honestly a little stunned. "I remember a few years back… we must have made thirty batches of cookies," Pam reminisced.

Alison remembered. The girls were a year and a half old and Alison and Emily had been married for six months. Emily had gone to a Saturday swim meet in December, leaving Alison and Pam with the babies for the day. They started talking about how excited they were for fresh Christmas cookies and before they knew it, they were baking up a storm and making every cookie that they knew a recipe for. They had bonded over the different cookies and which parts of their families were represented from each recipe. Alison had raided her mother's cook book in the years after she lost her and learned most of the recipes in there. Baking with Pam felt made her feel happy because it was like having a motherly figure.

That had been before the fighting. Before the separation. Before the divorce. Before two hard years in Oregon and an awkward return. She wondered if she and the other woman could rebuild their relationship. Pam was a lot sometimes, but Alison had really missed her in the last few years.

"I'd like that," she smiled. Pam returned the smile and continued her business of packing leftovers as if she hadn't just given Alison the olive branch that she had been so desperately craving. She knew that Pam might always be guarded because of the past, but she was grateful that the other woman was giving her a chance again. Her first holiday season back was shaping up to be a good one and she hoped that it could continue on this path.

—

A/N - Thanks you again for reading and sending your thoughts on the story my way. Love reading your reviews. I know that plenty of holidays have gone on this last week around the world and we've all had to celebrate a little bit differently. I hope that everyone was able to find some peace and joy in these tough times. Hang in there. I wish everyone well. Thanks!