She Comes And Goes As She Pleases (Part 49)
by BrDPirateMan

Beep-beep-beep-beep…

Hmm… Phone's alarm… going off.

With eyes half-closed I reached out and silenced it with the flick of a finger on the screen.

Six a.m… Classes started early today. Getting ready shouldn't take too long. I'd be fully awake in three… two… one…

And, right on cue, Eri burst through the door, delivering her morning greeting in an exaggerated soprano.

"Yoohoo! Breakfast is ready!"

"Yoohoo to you too," I mumbled. "One moment."

"Breakfast can't wait for a moment!" She whisked the covers off of me. "Your omelettes will grow cold!"

Painfully, I rose to my feet and followed her out of the room. "You seem more cheerful than normal. Did something happen?"

"I had a feeling you wouldn't remember," she sighed, as we both sat down at the dinner table. "But then again, you've always been low-key about it, so I can't say I'm surprised."

Puzzled, I pressed for answers. "What're you talking about?"

"Today's a very special day. Don't tell me you forgot?"

I was half-asleep before, but hearing that jolted me fully awake and the blood ran cold in my veins. It's a big no-no to forget about certain important occasions when you're in a relationship. I made very sure to commit all the relevant days to memory because of that. But to think I missed out on something… I shuddered to think of the consequences.

I should get what I knew out of the way first. "Eri, your birthday isn't till February. And our one-year anniversary is still two whole months away. It's not Christmas yet, and Halloween is not a part of our culture so we don't celebrate it. What's left? Uh… Eiji Oji Appreciation Day?"

"No, silly," she laughed. "That's not even a thing. Though it'd be nice if it were."

"I'm sorry," I said, bracing myself for the worst. "I'm afraid I don't know."

"Coming from you, this is hardly surprising… but still, really? Can one forget about their own birthday?"

I turned to the calendar hanging on the wall. And that's when I saw she was right. Today was a special day indeed…

"Oh, it's my birthday," I said. "Yeah, I totally forgot."

"What's with the dull surprise?" she remarked, reaching for an omelette. "You know, I never did know why you treat your own birthday with such indifference. Shouldn't you be ecstatic? This is the part where you jump up and down in excitement, right? Where's the joyous outburst? Or could it be you really hate growing old?"

"N-No, you see, it's like you said. I never placed much emphasis on my birthdays. For me, it's just a day where I'm officially a year older. Nothing more, and nothing less. Personally, I don't see why I need to make a fuss over it." Then I added swiftly, "That said, I'm more than happy to celebrate your birthday… I'm just more comfortable doing it in a… quieter capacity."

Eri was happy to hear about my views on birthday celebrations and was visibly glad that I was being honest. However, while she respected my opinion, it didn't mean she was going to agree with it anytime soon.

"Well, I say birthdays are important!" she claimed. "And they happen only once a year, so you gotta go all out! They're meant to be celebrated, not wasted by twiddling your thumbs… and no, playing games on your phone does not count as time well spent."

"H-How did you know I was going to bring that up as a counterargument?"

"Neku, listen up!" She jabbed a pointer finger at me dramatically. "We are going to celebrate your birthday today and that's final. However, I think you'd be more at ease with a quieter party. So this year it's gonna be just the two of us."

I was pleasantly surprised to hear that. When she announced that we were going to do something about my birthday I thought she was going to arrange for some unnecessarily lavish tea party or something. If it's just us both then there's nothing to fear. Plus it's nice that she was taking my preferences into account.

"Okay, that sounds cool," I said, polishing my rice bowl clean. "You don't really need to do this for me, though. I'm fine with just a bag of crisps and a DVD marathon."

"Pretty sure that's the kind of thing a shut-in would say." When she was done making wry glances at me, she did away with the sarcasm and spoke sincerely. "But seriously, I just want to do something for you, just as you've done so much for me already. I know I can't repay your kindness with one small birthday party, but I really want to do it."

Her thoughtfulness brought a smile to my lips, and as I gathered up my plates to take to the sink I gave her a quick peck on the forehead.

"Thanks, I'll be looking forward to it."

"Hee hee… I'll get things ready by the evening. You just head on to class now, I'll handle the rest. I've only got a couple of classes today, so I have plenty of time to prepare. And remember, think happy things!"

"Got it. Happy things."

"And unicorns. You can't go wrong with unicorns. They're horses with horns and wings that sparkle in the sunlight and fart rainbows."

"Th-They fart what now?"

A birthday party, huh? I couldn't recall much of the one I had when I was a kid, so the one tonight would be the first one in a very long time. I've been to a couple of my friends' birthday parties myself, but that was ages ago and I was still largely out of touch with the fine art of celebrating birthdays. Tonight's party would almost feel like a new experience, a refresher course of sorts.

Since Eri was the organizer, there's no telling what she might do. All I could hope for was that things didn't get out of hand. It's just a two-person party, but she's bound to have a weird trick or two up her sleeve to spice the festivities up some, and it'd end up being too much.

Then again, I shouldn't be too negative… For all I knew, this evening was going to be a clean and simple one.

Apart from that, it was all very exciting for me and although I would have other matters to keep me busy today, the party she promised was never far from my mind.

This should turn out to be lots of fun.

XOXOXOXOXO

Not a whole lot of people were aware of my birthday, but the ones who were took the trouble to offer me their best wishes.

The Bito siblings sent me individual messages all the way from Nagoya. Rhyme's went like this:

Neku, cut loose and have a smashing time today! Happy birthday!

Her brother had an even more relaxed attitude to his greeting, due in no small part to his liberal use of street talk, even in writing:

Oi, birthday boy. Me an' my sis, we all the way in Nagoya, sorry we can't give you your presents in person. So we send them by mail. Maybe you can get them tomorrow. Cheers, yo!

Right below that message he inserted a photo of his most delicious dish – a plate of steaming-hot okonomiyaki. Then there was the obligatory 'Happy Birthday' message and that was it.

Heh, the good ol' siblings weren't bad people at all…

And later in the afternoon Shiki gave me a call.

"So how's it feel to be a year older?" she sniggered.

"Going straight for the jugular, eh?" I snorted. "Age doesn't bother me, though."

"Eh, you're still young. Wait another ten years and you'll wish you were twenty-one again. You'll see. Oh, and happy birthday."

"I find it flattering that you tacked on your birthday wishes as an afterthought."

"You know what they say, it's the thought that counts!" she chuckled. "But seriously, I hope you have a very happy birthday. I passed your gift to Eri after class this morning, so go get it from her later."

"Oh, really? Thanks!"

"Eri's been very excited the whole of today. She couldn't keep still during class and I reckon it's because of the little dinner party she planned for you tonight."

"Huh, she told you about it?"

"More like she wouldn't shut up about it," laughed Shiki. "And she said that it's going to be for just the two of you… so it's not really a birthday bash anymore, is it? I'd call it a romantic dinner date… with birthday party undertones."

"Whatever works, I guess. I've never had a birthday party since I was a kid, so I'm kinda curious myself how it'll turn out."

"If the organizer is Eri, you better be ready for anything. Have fun."

"Will do, thanks. Oh, Shiki, one more thing…"

"Hmm?"

"What's in the present you gave me? Is it cash?"

Shiki just laughed at my little joke. "Are all kids these days this materialistic? Open it when you get home!"

While not so overjoyed that I would be bouncing all around the place, I was still happy to receive my friends' blessings. My stance on my own birthday may remain somewhat apathetic, but it's still a nice feeling to know I have friends who care about me enough that they would go out of their way to give me their best wishes.

It was almost evening when my classes ended; I got yet another call and this time it was Eri herself.

"Neku, I'm still doing the final touches for your birthday party. Could you, maybe, spend time somewhere else for now?"

Her request puzzled me. "What's wrong? Is everything alright there?"

"Of course! Since when did I ever make you worry?"

I hesitated, deciding not to retort, "You always make me worry."

"Neku," she said, "that pause just now… You were probably thinking, 'You always make me worry', weren't you?"

"O-Oh, no, not at all, really." Damn, she got me good… "But what's going on back there?"

"I'm cooking a bit of stuff for this evening, but that's gonna take a little while. That's why I'm asking you to go do something."

"In the kitchen, eh?" I teased. "Don't tell me you're having trouble tying up your apron, and you're keeping me away so I wouldn't see you?"

"Oh, lookie here," she retorted in good fun, "the birthday boy's actually trying to diss the cook. Would you like to have an extra bottle of hot sauce in your hamburger steak?"

I laughed. "No thanks. Anyway… how long do you need me gone?"

"Half an hour. I wouldn't be long. Just go do your thing for now while I finish up."

"Thirty minutes. Yeah, okay, catch you in a bit."

I could just picture her struggling with the apron and it was the cutest mental image ever. She never got the hang of tying it properly, and yet she could hook up her own bra from behind in two seconds flat. It defied logic and it's actually pretty funny to boot. Then again, bra clasps are more straightforward to use than apron strings…

So I just had to kill time for half an hour, huh? Sounds easy enough… There was an arcade not too far away from here. Or I could hit up a manga cafe and read some comics. Maybe there's something right up my alley in the electronics store that I could buy as my own birthday present. I'd been looking to buy a new external hard drive anyway.

I was walking down the street, wondering which of my three options would do the trick, when I happened to pass by a lingerie store. Now, that's nothing strange in itself. What's strange was that Kariya was inside. Picking out women's panties. By himself.

The sight of him caused me to stand rooted to the spot, flabbergasted. What in the world was he up to? Did he have some cross-dressing hobby I wasn't made aware of?

It was too bizarre for me to just let go. Curiosity became my weakness and it tempted me to get to the bottom of this mystery. So in I went.

Lingerie stores were no longer a barrier for me. Eri had dragged me along on so many trips to the nearest Lacy Temptations branch store that frankly, nothing shocks me anymore. I'd become quite blasé towards all the shelves of underwear and half-naked mannequins. And I learnt to largely ignore the suspicious stares I'd sometimes get.

I tapped Kariya on the shoulder. "Hey man, what're you doing?"

For that one moment when he was caught red-handed, the normally cool-headed Reaper looked silly with a pair of panties dangling from his fingers.

Oh, this was awkward. What should I even say to him? "I saw you looking through the G-string section and thought I'd drop by and say hi"?

The tense atmosphere eased up somewhat when he de-petrified himself, reverting to his calm nature. He cleared his throat out of sheer necessity and was very quiet when he spoke, like a kid who had been caught stealing from the cookie jar and resigned himself to his fate.

"Well, you've caught me, Phones. Not gonna lie here, man: I was looking for the right underwear to buy."

"For yourself?"

"No. This is supposed to be your birthday present. But I guess the cat's out of the bag now."

I raised my eyebrows, then brought them crashing together in a frown. "What the heck? What makes you think I need a pair of panties?"

"I meant it as a joke present. You're supposed to laugh at it, not wear it."

"Oh, okay. That makes more sense. In that case I'm glad I stopped you in time."

"Y-You don't like it?"

"If Eri sees that I got ladies' underwear as a gift from someone else, she'll have a fit. And while I have a solid reason for that, she'll still ask a ton of questions regardless, and I don't want to trip over myself explaining… not to mention I'd rather not have to see her face when she's scary. And she can get really scary."

"Didn't take her for the jealous type."

"Oh, she gets jealous easily," I huffed, crossing my arms. "She's okay with me receiving panties as a present… as long as it's her panties."

"Damn," he whistled, "she's one hell of a girl, huh? You lucky dog."

From the corner of my eye I saw the other customers inch away from us in obvious discomfort. Our conversation was… unwholesome, to say the least. I didn't think I was talking that loudly, but they heard us anyway. Whoops…

I quickly ushered Kariya out of the store. Back in the relative comfort of the streets, I breathed a sigh of relief. He didn't seem too bothered, although he was visibly disappointed that I didn't dig his gift idea.

"Look, it's okay even if you don't give me anything," I said humbly. "It's good enough for me that you care about my birthday."

"Hey, c'mon now!" he snapped, sounding slightly indignant. "I can't just give you nothing… Uzuki's on her way to your house to drop off her present, and even Mr H has a little something for you. It's not fair that I'm going to be the odd one out here."

After hearing that, I guess it wouldn't be fair after all. He really wanted to give me something for my birthday. His initial choice of a gift may have been too weird to consider, but it's the thought that counts (the weirdness factor kinda overshadows his generosity though).

"Well, okay," I said with a shrug, "I guess a manga would be fine…"

"How does that make a good present?!" he grunted, in heavy disagreement with me. "I can't give you something so tacky! That'd weigh so heavily on my conscience!"

"B-But I really am fine with anything. I don't have anything in particular that I'd like to have."

"There has to be. You're just not thinking hard enough. Get creative! It's your birthday and I'm feeling extra generous, so you better take advantage of it!"

I took a moment to think before jabbing a random suggestion at him. "Okay, you know all of those legendary, super-rare weapons you have in your Heroes of Ziodim account?" In case you forgot, Heroes of Ziodim was the MMORPG that he and I played regularly.

"Huh? What about it?"

"Well, I was just thinking that if you could give me one of them, it'd make for a pretty good birthday pre– "

"Absolutely not. My babies are off-limits. I'm fine with anything else. Just not this."

That's a definite no-no. I could only laugh weakly at how rigid his face had become. Playtime with HoZ was serious business for him.

In the end, he bought me a manga for my birthday.

XOXOXOXOXO

The thirty minutes were up and Eri beckoned me back home with a quick message. The party was going to start real soon, and I sure as heck wouldn't miss it for the world!

However, for what must be the first time in my life, I was actually nervous about entering my own home.

Anything could be behind the front door that I was so hesitant to open. Eri promised to make the party a quiet affair, but she still loved surprises. I probably could handle a good ol' party popper to the face or ticker tape being thrown on my hair, but if it's anything like a bevy of strippers waiting to pounce on me I wouldn't know how to deal with that. Then again, she wouldn't want anyone else other than herself to jump me in the first place…

When I found myself unconsciously pacing back and forth, I realized I might have put too much thought into the whole thing. Enough of being so uptight… I should just get in there, let my hair down and enjoy myself already!

I unlocked the front door and, having taken a deep breath to steel my nerves, launched myself inside. By now the evening had turned to night (it gets dark early around this time of the year, you see), so when the door closed behind me like a casket lid I found myself in complete darkness.

Aha! I knew what this was supposed to be. She wanted me to turn on the lights so she could surprise me with whatever she had kept hidden in the dark. I fumbled around in the darkness, feeling my way in the general direction of the nearest light switch. Then I flicked it on…

…and true enough the dining room had been transformed. Well, there weren't a lot of changes – there was none of the balloons and other decorations that made parties so gaudy to look at – but what was there was a sight to behold. A lavish assortment of snacks was laid out on the dining table – tempura, somen, hamburger steaks, and more. Taken as a whole, this selection of foodstuffs made for a peculiar combination. But it's all good to eat, so I wasn't going to complain. Oh, and a small pile of wrapped gifts was sitting on the coffee table in the living room, too. All in all, the party was set up pretty well, if a little unorthodox.

The mastermind herself was missing, though.

"Eri?" I called out. "Where are you?"

I ambled over to the dining table, eyes transfixed on the food the entire time. She expended no small amount of effort whipping all of this up just for me. That made me really happy. Just think: all of this was her own work. I could tell these were made from recipes that I taught her. The distinctive aroma was a dead giveaway. This was a reminder of how far she's come from her high school days when she always ended up in last place in home economics class. Gotta say, I was awfully proud of her.

The scent of home-cooked meals sent me into a giddy sort of heaven but when she finally showed up, having come out of her room, my idea of heaven became even giddier.

"Oh! You're back already?" she called out. "I wanted to hide behind the sofa and surprise you when you came in… but I took too long deciding what to wear for tonight that I missed out on my opportunity! Sorry about that!"

Much of what she said went over my head. I couldn't help but notice how fresh she looked in the clothes she was wearing. That was one hell of a low-slung sweater… and her shorts were so tiny, I almost thought she wasn't wearing anything below the waist. My inner pervert bubbled to the surface and made me attempt a cheeky remark.

"I can't decide which is more delicious: the food or the hostess."

Eri threw her head back and laughed. "Hey, I actually like that one!"

"My apologies, heh… I couldn't help it. That is one nice sweater."

"Glad you like it! But I'm sorry, I can't give this to you."

"That's fine. I'd need breasts to wear it well anyway."

More laughter. "Someone's a hurricane of jokes today. Now! Let's not waste any more time. The food isn't gonna eat itself, so c'mere and sit down and we'll get the ball rolling!"

There was so much food on the dining table that finding my plate was almost like looking for a needle in a haystack. Eri bashfully admitted that she might have made too much for dinner, an observation that I simply had to agree with. But I told her it was alright, since we should have enough leftovers to not have to worry about breakfast tomorrow. Oh well, moderation really wasn't her forte…

A quick prayer later in gratitude for the food, we tucked in with great relish. She had just as much fun watching me eat as she did joining in the meal with me.

"I like the somen, it's nice and cold," I said. "And I think you did a really good job with the gyoza (dumplings) too."

"Watch out for the one with hot mustard in it!"

"Huh? You put what in it?"

"I packed hot mustard in one of the gyoza, but I don't remember which one. I thought it'd be fun to have ourselves a game of Russian Dumpling Roulette."

Uh-oh… I wasn't very good with spicy foods. We didn't normally keep hot mustard around the house. She must have bought it specially for this purpose!

"Say, Eri? Is the hot mustard, um… like, really hot?"

"Sure it is!" she said, ever so cheerily, plucking a gyoza with her chopsticks. "It wouldn't be called hot mustard if – "

The moment Eri sank her teeth into her gyoza, her face froze and the smile on her lips melted away. What followed was a feat of superhuman proportions. One second she was sitting with me, the next she had vanished into thin air. I almost couldn't catch where she had gone. Then I found her bent over at the kitchen sink, running tap water through her mouth.

Oh boy. She didn't touch the gyoza all this while, and the first one she ate happened to be the hot one? I didn't know if this was her being lucky or the exact opposite.

"Uh, water wouldn't help, Eri. Need some yogurt?"

"I'll be fine!" she gasped. "See? I'm okay!"

She lifted her head out of the running stream of tap water and gave me a peace sign… except it didn't match with her wet dribbling chin and red teary eyes.

"You look like something out of a horror movie. Forget it, I'm getting you yogurt." And I fished out a packet from the fridge, tearing the foil covering halfway. I scooped out a spoonful, waving it towards her mouth. "Here, have this one before your head catches fire. You'll feel a lot better, trust me. Go on, say 'ahhh' and all that."

Eri stared at the spoonful of yogurt hovering in front of her face, and though she was in pain, she still had enough in her to crack a micro-sized joke.

"Ahhh and all that."

"Just eat it already," I snorted.

Once the yogurt touched her tongue, the relief was immediate. "Mmm. Yeah, you're right. That feels a lot better, Neku. Thanks. Still, that really sucked, considering it's supposed to be you who ate it!"

"Uh… sorry for being so fortunate."

"Nah, no hard feelings, Neku. I think it's funny. But before we go back to eating…"

She reached into the fridge, took out the small bottle of hot mustard that was buried inside, and tossed it into the dustbin.

"There," she huffed, partly to herself. "Hot mustard, my god! What was I thinking? I'm never touching this stuff again."

Once bitten, twice shy…

After that spicy fiasco, dinner proceeded as normal. It was a calm and peaceful evening, just the way I liked it. Even the normally boisterous Eri seemed to enjoy letting her energetic nature take a back seat. As a matter of fact, if it weren't for the birthday setting, or the ludicrous amounts of food on the table or the presents I knew I would get to open later, this would be an ordinary evening meal, which was nice in its own way.

My mistake was thinking that such peace would last more than five minutes.

"Eri?! Hey, um, c-could you cut it out?"

"What? I didn't do anything." She held both of her hands up.

"I'm trying to eat here! Leave the footsie stuff for later, will you? This isn't the time for this."

I wasn't angry in the very least, but her foot was violating me in various places from my legs to the insides of my thighs, which made it hard to concentrate on eating. Exasperatingly, she insisted on her stand of innocence, all while unsuccessfully trying to stifle her giggles. If this was how she was going to play…

"Playing dumb, are we?" I huffed, eager for revenge. "Then I hope you don't mind if I try out a little move I personally call…

"…The Upstream Leg Swim."

The instant my toes clamped onto her shin, she made a little jump in her seat and froze. And she made the cutest "uh-oh" face. Then I moved my foot up all along the entirety of her bare leg, right up to her thighs. And back down. Then I need only rinse and repeat for Eri to devolve into a ticklish, giggling mess. I had her now.

"Oh, stop it!" She was in hysterics. "You're gonna kill me, Neku!"

Mimicking her earlier actions, I held up both hands with a shrug. "What's the matter? I didn't do anything. See? My hands are free."

"I give, I give! Hahaha!"

"You're going to have to do better than that, Eri. Otherwise…"

I switched to her other leg, attacking it with a vengeance. It was awfully funny, watching her go into spasms and laugh so hard her head could come off at any moment. Ah, how cathartic revenge could be. Eventually I decided that her punishment lasted long enough and let go of her sufficiently ravaged legs.

Gasping for air, Eri's body had gone so soft she had to prop herself on one elbow in order to sit somewhat straight.

"So," I sniggered, "do you repent?"

"I repent with every fiber of my being," she panted with a tired smile. "I stood no chance, Neku. Your aggressiveness caught me off-guard. Even now, my legs are still tingling."

"What can I say… I've got great technique."

"Whew… you don't say."

She recovered soon enough.

"Say, uh… Neku, you finished with dinner? Shall we pack all this food up?"

"Yeah, I'm done here."

She took a moment to regain her composure, much of which she lost to the torture she endured at my hands.

"Coolio! Let's clear the table and then we can take out the birthday cake!"

XOXOXOXOXO

A cake now sat on the table where our dinner previously had been. It wasn't too big and looked to be just the right size for two people. It was cream in colour, so it must be vanilla-flavored. And it had a nice smell.

My very own birthday cake…

Eri took out a packet of candles, ready to adorn it, but looked like she had remembered something.

"Oh, that's right! I almost forgot!"

"What is it, Eri?"

She zipped into the kitchen and was back in three seconds, cradling a fire extinguisher in her arms. Wait… a fire extinguisher?

"Uh, Eri?" I was thoroughly baffled. "Wh-What's this for?"

Setting it down on a chair beside her, she replied, "We're going to be dealing with fire when we light those candles. Never hurts to be careful. If anything goes wrong – touch wood – I want to at least be prepared for it."

I appreciated the thought, and I certainly couldn't deny that even the smallest fires could be dangerous, but having it right next to us like some birthday guest sure felt strange.

"Oh, another thing?" added Eri. "I'm calling it Smoky Boy. Please say hi."

"…Th-That's a terrible name for a fire extinguisher."

She puffed one cheek out in mild annoyance. "Then you think up of a better name, smarty-pants."

I snorted. "Heh… you bet I'll think of a cool name. I was the one who christened Kariya's LAN party group SHIBUY4 G4MERS, after all!"

"Alright, alright, don't get a big head. What've you got?"

Gotta think fast… "Hmmm, well, what about… Scarlet Saviour!"

Eri stared at me, bug-eyed as if incredulous at my suggestion. Then she actually started to laugh.

"What's so funny?" I grumbled. "It's a cool name! It's a fire extinguisher that can save lives and it's red. There isn't a more apt name than that!"

"Ahaha… Sorry, but Smoky Boy does not approve. He says 'nice try', though, so don't feel too bad."

"I'm being consoled by a fire extinguisher of all things. I have such a sad life."

My reaction was met without another word, only gentle laughter. Eri carefully stuck some candles into the top of the cake. Soon the room was pitch-black with only the lit candles as illumination. Basked in the orange glow of the flames, she looked alluring and mysterious. Her exposed cleavage was a point of interest for my roving eyes more than once, and I had to mentally slap myself upside the head every time I got too distracted.

I truly am a lucky guy to have such a nice and beautiful girlfriend. And she's celebrating my birthday to boot!

"Congratulations, Neku," she said with glee, clapping her hands, "on turning twenty-one today! I'm so happy for you!"

"Thank you so much!"

"I'm gonna sing the birthday song now. You ready?"

I gave her a thumbs-up. "Go for it!"

Her lips parted ajar, getting ready to sing. Then her voice rang through the silence of the room.

"Happy birthday to you…"

It's no secret that Eri was a bad singer. Every time she's in the bathroom taking a shower, she'd burst into song and I'd have to ram tissues into my ears to block out her cacophonous singing, often to no avail. I didn't think anyone could mess up the iconic birthday song, but here she was… messing it up. The highs were too high and the lows too low, and everything else about those four lines was plain wrong. And I didn't have tissues at hand this time to save my bleeding ears.

But even then, I truly enjoyed the song because she looked so happy singing her heart out and swaying from side to side to the tune. I couldn't find it in myself to be critical of her when she was having so much fun. She really was looking forward to this party. And for her to do so much just for me, well… she's someone special, that's for sure.

The song was over and applause followed.

"Yay!" she squealed. "Alright, time to make a wish! I need you to close your eyes and think very carefully. Take your time, okay? I don't want you to rush."

"Ooh, it's wish time, huh? I got it, Eri. I won't r– "

"Actually, I forbid you from rushing! This is a very important birthday ritual, you know? You absolutely have to give it some thought, it's not just something you can get over with in five seconds!"

"Uh-huh… sure."

"And keep those eyes closed until I say so!"

Bewildered by her bossy attitude, I sought to clarify, "S-So when can I blow out the candles? I don't think this part needs to be this complicated…"

"I'll tell you when. Just… Just follow my lead. In the meantime, make your wish as hard as you can."

Such specific instructions… What was she planning? I felt like she was funneling me towards some hidden objective. I'd hate it if she nailed me in the face with a cream pie while I couldn't see… But she's not that cruel, so whatever it was, it couldn't be bad, right?

I did as I was told and closed my eyes, thinking about what I wanted for my birthday. There wasn't any need to think too hard on this one, though. Right from the outset, I knew that there was only one thing I truly wanted, and only she could grant that wish.

So please, let me stay by your side, Eri. That's all…

"Neku?" came her voice through the blackness behind my closed eyes. "It's okay to blow out the candles now. Get 'em all in one fell swoop!"

Finally I was able to open my eyes. I readied a deep breath and then the candles went out simultaneously, plunging the room back into darkness. When the lights came back on and I was temporarily robbed of my sight, I had to narrow my eyes to brace myself against the brightness, all while my respiratory prowess was met with raucous approval.

"Great going, Neku!" whooped Eri. "Here, have this!"

My eyes adjusted just in time to see a sash being looped across my body like the ones you see being worn by beauty pageant contestants. Some words were emblazoned on it in bright bold letters.

"Wh-What's this?" I squinted at the words on my sash, reading them aloud. "Happy 21st birthday to the sexiest boyfriend a girl could ever have…"

I looked up from my sash as I was about to thank her for being so sweet, but the sight of her in a completely different getup made me jump.

"Whoa! Eri?! Wh-What're you wearing?"

"Ta-da! What do you think of my bunny outfit? How do I look?"

What else could I say? The truth of the matter was, it looked mighty fine on her. Everything from the one-piece garment to the stockings right down to the wrist cuffs and rabbit ears… It was… How should I put it in words that properly encapsulate how highly I thought of her dress sense?

"Don't keep a girl waiting," she pouted, leaning into my face. Her half-exposed breasts jiggled the tiniest bit, in very real danger of popping out into the open. "This is the part where you dispense with some appropriate comments."

I cleared my throat. "You look…"

"Yes?" she giggled expectantly. "How do I look?"

"…like a rabbit."

She placed her hands on her hips.

"Neku," she grumbled, "you know that's not what I want to hear."

"Sorry," I chuckled. "I'm just messing with you. You do look gorgeous… It looks really good on you. But I didn't know you had a suit like this."

Happy that she finally heard some praise, she revealed, "I don't. I rented this from a cosplay store. Ahaha, I actually had a hard time deciding between this and the maid costume."

"So what made you choose the bunny outfit in the end?"

"I've been a butler for so long that I can't see myself becoming a maid. It'll feel too much like a sex change."

"Th-That's your reason?"

"Plus it's easier to move around in bunny outfits. No need for poofy cumbersome skirts!"

"So is this why you were so insistent on me keeping my eyes closed?"

She shot me a cheeky look. "Well, I needed time to change clothes, right? I wanted to give you a nice surprise when the lights came back on."

"And you have my thanks," I said with a smile, "for being so thoughtful."

"Anyway," she proclaimed, "without further ado, let me just wish you one more time… Happy birthday!"

"Heh, thanks!"

"Alright!" She clapped her hands together once and directed my attention towards the cake. "This is a vanilla cheesecake that I bought from Valhalla Cakemasters and it's one of their bestsellers. I thought it'd be perfect for tonight's occasion."

"I've never tried their cheesecakes before. I wonder if it's any good."

"We'll find out!"

With napkin in place on my lap, she cut out a slice of the cake and handed it to me on a plate. The first bite bombarded my taste buds with an incredible sensation. Whoever baked this was a pro at his job. It didn't hurt that Eri was dressed so… nicely, and that she had a couple of wonderful… 'cakes' of her own.

Life was good.

"Damn, this is great," I said, nodding. "What do you think, Eri?"

No answer. She was too busy chewing her own mouthful of bliss. It was hopeless; she had fallen to pieces. Apparently vanilla cheesecake was too much for a mere mortal like her to handle.

"Um, Eri?"

She gave a sigh, one hand on her cheek and a faraway look in her eyes. "Gosh… this is fantastic. It just melts in your mouth and you're like, mmmm! Honestly, I almost had an orgasm for a second there."

"Ugh! I'm trying to eat here!"

"Don't be shy. Have another one!"

"Another orgasm?"

"No, silly, another slice! Here."

She plopped a second slice of cake onto my plate with a friendly smile.

"Not to sound ungrateful or anything," I grunted, patting my distended stomach, "but I'm really full. You might have cooked a little too much for dinner. I'm not sure I can take another one."

"Another orgasm?" she said jokingly, mimicking me.

I meant another slice, but she knew that. I rolled my eyes to the ceiling and turned on my infamous sarcasm mode. "Yes, another orgasm. I don't know if I can finish eating this orgasm, Eri."

"Then gimme half so you don't waste it. Surely you're okay with half an orgasm, right?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine. And it's a good thing no one's listening in to our conversation."

"Hahaha! You started it."

"Fair enough."

I chopped the cake slice in half across the middle, leaving her to scoop up the bigger portion for herself, which she scarfed down. However, addled by a stomachful of dinner, she didn't get far with dessert either. The rest of the cake had to be packed into the fridge.

She chuckled, attempting to reignite a gag that had long grown stale. "We'll polish off the rest of this delicious vanilla-flavored orgasm tomorrow."

"Oh please." I buried my face in one hand and shook my head. "That sounds wrong on so many levels."

"Hee hee!"

I don't think I can look at vanilla the same way again…

Eri grasped my wrist in her hand and gently pulled me towards the living room.

"Your presents are waiting, birthday boy," she chimed. "Everyone got you a little something!"

XOXOXOXOXO

Sitting side by side on the couch, we took a long look at the pile of presents that Eri had assembled on the coffee table. It was a tiny pile most people wouldn't even take a second glance at, but for a guy who hasn't had a birthday party in ages, it was a sight no less impressive.

I simply had to make sure. "This is all for me, right?"

"Better believe it!" said Eri.

"I'm just unused to the sight of a bunch of things all piled up, and they're all for me! Say, can I open yours first?"

"H-Huh?"

"Makes sense that your birthday present would be the first one I open, right?"

She answered with hesitance. "Um, actually, is it okay if we leave mine for last?"

"Huh? Why?"

"Hey, you know what they say, leave the best things for last… right?"

For a second I could've sworn she sounded… nervous. That's strange coming from Eri, whom I knew to be a well of confidence. But maybe it's just as she said: the best things are left for last. Could she be anxious that I might not like her gift?

The first present I laid my hands on was Uzuki's. She'd stuck a tiny card onto the longish gift box, bearing a simple but functional message:

Happy birthday, Neku. Have fun and stay well.

Uzuki

"Aww, that's so sweet of her!" cooed Eri. "She's not the best at conveying her emotions, but that's part of what makes her so cute."

"The charm of the cold beauty, huh. Hides a warm heart underneath her cool exterior. Something like that, anyway."

"I bet if she gave it to you in person, she'll be like, 'Don't be mistaken! It's not like we're close or anything! This is an obligatory gift!'"

"And you're the one who says I read too much manga…"

Turned out, she gave me a tie. A navy blue one. It's not the most imaginative gift in the world, but I was still glad I got something. I actually didn't think she'd go out of her way to buy me something.

Eri held the tie up against my shirt collar, nodding. "I think you'll look good pairing this with a white dress shirt."

"It's got a really soothing colour too."

"I can't wait to see you wear this!" she squealed dreamily. "When we graduate and finally get into the workforce, I'll help you adjust your tie in the morning before you go to work, and in the evening when you come back, I'll take it off for you while we make out! That's what I call true bliss."

"Now you're thinking like a cheesy romance novel."

Mr H's present was an envelope containing a 10000 yen cash bonus.

"You don't see many employers like him," I remarked. "What kind of boss gives money to his employees as a birthday present?"

Eri had to agree. "What kind of boss gives presents at all?"

Now I'd have a hard time trying to give him an even better present on his birthday. What are you supposed to give a man who has it made?

"He's a fan of coffee," I mused. "Maybe a truck full of coffee beans would make the perfect birthday present for him."

She slapped my knee with a laugh. "Don't be silly. This is the Coffee Crusader we're talking about. He'd want all the coffee he can get his hands on in the whole of Japan, not just a truckload."

"Then you got me stumped, Eri. I'll have to think about that another time. His birthday isn't till much later, anyway."

"Does he even like celebrating the fact that he gets older on birthdays? You know how touchy he is with age."

"Hmmm… Food for thought…"

Shiki gave me a hand-made scarf. As someone who had considerable skill in sewing, it should come as no surprise that she made it herself.

"It's kinda long," I observed, after unraveling it to its full length. "Maybe too long."

"With a scarf this long, you can probably wear it and pretend you're a ninja."

"Sure, if I was six years old. But I can think of a more practical use for it."

I first wrapped one end of the scarf around my neck, then did the same with the other end for Eri's neck. The end result was the two of us connected to each other with a good length of scarf between us.

"See?" I said, grinning. "We can stay warm together in the mornings when we walk to the bus stop. Or whenever we're out. Two birds, one stone!"

She fingered the woolen material of the scarf. "And therein lies a few problems."

"Huh?"

"Hate to burst your bubble, Neku; I know it's your birthday and all, but we don't go to the same college, remember? What happens when we have to part ways? One of us will have to take off their half of the scarf and the other will be left to lug the whole thing along for the rest of the day."

I knew that would come up sooner rather than later. I was just hoping Eri would play along and be a tad romantic.

"And also," she continued, "what if we're walking down the street, and the middle part snags on something, like a lamppost, a traffic light or even another person?"

"Okay, so much for that…"

"I've got a better idea!"

She took the scarf off of me and wrapped it around both of our necks so that we were now both locked within a single loop.

"Let's face it, Neku – and I don't want to sound mean to Shiki, but – a scarf this long wouldn't be very practical out in public. But when we're at home and we need some warmth… heh, that's when it'll shine."

She's right. It's much better like this. And far more romantic than my initial idea. Maybe this was what it was meant for in the first place. Did Shiki make this scarf intending for us to use it in this way?

I gotta give her my deepest thanks, at any rate.

After we took it off, we set our sights on the final present sitting on the table: Eri's. She became visibly anxious, clutching onto the scarf like a security blanket. Was she scared that I might not like her gift?

"Calm down," I chuckled, looping an arm around her waist. "Are you getting more nervous than the birthday boy? How about we switch places and let me be the nervous one?"

Her cheeks were tinged pink and I was treated to an adorable smile. The bunny ears made her look even cuter. And it looked like my little spot of humour calmed her down somewhat.

"You're funny. And… thanks for being so nice."

I looked all around the box in my hands. It was roughly the size of one of a lunchbox, and was covered in gleaming purple wrapper; upon closer examination, I saw that the ends of the box were wrapped rather crudely, like it was done by someone who had little experience with preparing presents. Eri probably did it herself by the looks of it. When I shook the box gently to try and ascertain the contents from the noise it made, I heard a dull heavy sound, like it was knocking against cardboard… It could be anything.

Tired of making stabs in the dark, I decided that the time was nigh.

"Okay," I said, "I'm gonna open it up."

I found a kink in the wrapper and tore it apart from there. In a flourish it came away…

"Oh!" I held up my present, freshly revealed, like a trophy. "An external hard drive! You shouldn't have!"

Eri blinked, surprised at my reaction. "Y-You like it?"

"Sure I do! I've been meaning to get one for some time now, but I haven't gotten round to buying it. It's exactly what I wanted, and you just saved me a trip to the computer hardware store. Thanks, Eri!"

She titled her head to one side ever so slightly like a curious little bird. "I didn't think you'd like this. I mean, don't take it the wrong way, but I wasn't sure if it's something you'd like. I see you working on your laptop a lot, so I thought you might need this. It's just that something like an external hard drive doesn't make a very exciting birthday present…"

"It doesn't have to be exciting," I said kindly. "And I can see you put a lot of thought into this. You wouldn't be so anxious about me opening the present otherwise."

Upon hearing this, Eri loosened up in relief and laughed. "Yeah, I was afraid you would think it's tacky."

"It's not, trust me. I'm going to find a lot of use out of it."

She let out a cute squeak when she found herself trapped in my arms. Slowly, gently, I planted my lips on top of hers, and she reciprocated with eagerness, hands snaking onto my chest. It was with great reluctance that we stopped.

"Thank you so much," I breathed. "Really, just… thanks."

"Hee hee… Well, if you're happy, that's good enough for me."

I crumpled the discarded wrappings into a ball and was about to toss it out when Eri spoke up, catching my attention.

"Hey Neku, I have a confession to make."

"Hmm? A confession?"

With a slightly embarrassed tone, she admitted, "I… well, I actually don't really know how to organize a birthday party."

I set the ball of wrappings back down on the coffee table and sat back to listen to her.

"Well," I said, shrugging, "I didn't really see anything wrong with this one. I had a lot of fun. If this is the first one you've organized, it's a pretty good effort."

"That's good to know…" She brought one leg up, hugging it against her body in a casual way. "…but it's true. I'm no expert. For instance, I didn't know how much I should cook, so I ended up cooking too much. And I still wonder if I might have overdone it dressing up as a bunny. 'Cause, you know? I don't have all that much experience with birthday parties. Organizing them, anyway.

"After all, I've never had a birthday party of my own in my whole life."

This revelation was an eye-opener. I expected the lively, outgoing Eri to have had a couple of birthday bashes in the past at the very least, but here she was telling me that it's never happened for her at all?

"Not even once?" I quizzed.

"Nope. You know how strict my parents can get. I asked them once or twice if I could hold a party but they wouldn't allow it. They said that no, I should be studying so I can secure a stable future for myself. When I graduate and am gainfully employed… then I could have a party."

While she was talking, her face had fallen into an emotionless stare, and with the tone the way it was, it sounded less like she was bitter or even sad about her parents' strictness and more like she had long resigned herself to her circumstances. It was just… flatness that was on her face. The girl had a rougher time growing up than I thought.

"They typically gave me some cash as my birthday present," she added. "Usually 10000 yen. Twice that amount if I got a good ranking in class. But not all of my grades were great, so getting 20000 yen at a time was impossible. I never knew what it was like to open a birthday present, to tear the wrapping off… until I moved here to Shibuya where I actually got stuff from friends. I'm not saying that I'm ungrateful for the cash, it's just that I felt like I was missing something, you know?"

"Whoa, I… I had no idea."

"At least Granny's more easygoing. She may not have the authority to hold parties for me, but she cooks me my favorite dishes on my birthdays!" Her lips curled up into a small smile.

"Your housekeeper sounds like a nice person to do all that for you… Hey, when you moved here, how did you celebrate your birthdays? Without your parents' supervision, you could easily throw one for yourself, right?"

"I could, but I didn't know how. I was scared it'd turn out badly, so I never tried. I did get presents from some of my friends, but my birthdays were always spent on my own."

"Ooh… I'm sorry to hear that."

"Ah, no, sorry, Neku!" She broke into one of her goofy grins and her gloomy aura immediately faded. "I didn't mean to get all broody and spoil the mood. We're supposed to have fun, not listen to me ramble on and on about my life. So please! Let's get back into the swing of things."

But after listening to her, I had no intention of just letting it go so easily. This was a girl who hid some harsh truths behind her happy-go-lucky personality. I wanted to do something for her.

I patted her on the head, right between those bunny ears. She stopped staring into space and glanced my way with a curious look.

"Eri," I said, "I'm sorry to hear you never got the chance to properly celebrate your own birthday. It must suck to feel left out. Tell you what, when your birthday comes round I'll throw a party for you. How's that sound?"

Her eyes widened. "Um… you will?"

"You make it sound like I wouldn't," I chuckled. "Honestly, I'm quite offended! …Just kidding. Look, I want to celebrate your birthday too, Eri. Now, I'm also not experienced when it comes to holding parties, but I'll think of something good and when the time comes we can have a lot of fun. Does that fly with you?"

She brightened up considerably and was back to her usual self. In fact, she was getting excited in anticipation of a party she could call her own.

"Yeah, that's cool with me!" she replied. "But… can we make it just for the two of us, like this one?"

"Ah yes, I'd like that too. Sure, why not?"

Eri repaid my generosity with a bear hug of epic proportions. So epic, in fact, that I lost my balance and plopped onto my back, taking her with me. It sure made me glad the couch was soft enough to cushion my fall. Lying at the bottom, all I could do was look up at her happy face as she grinned from ear to ear.

"Thank you!" she said. "I'll be looking forward to it!"

"It's a promise," I said, smiling, "so when February comes along, keep an eye out for it."

"You don't need to tell me twice!"

All in all, it should come as no surprise that to me, this was the best birthday ever!

XOXOXOXOXO

The next day, I returned from the post office with a package in hand. The senders were the Bito siblings and it was in here that I would find my gift.

"Open it!" said Eri, curious as all heck. "Go on, hop to it!"

"You're actually more eager than I am to open it…"

"And you're not?"

"Of course I am. I'm just telling you to calm down so you don't fly through the ceiling."

She did look like she was going to pounce on the package at a moment's notice and rip it to shreds for me. I could see it in her eyes. But no, this was not her job. It was my responsibility to face alone. It was up to me to bear the immense burden of opening the package and putting her out of her misery. Otherwise she'd never stop jumping.

A dense blanket of packing peanuts sat inside, which we scooped out. We eventually unearthed a snow globe, whose beauty we took a long moment to appreciate together. Then I grasped it carefully, making sure I had a good grip, then gave it a firm shake. The particles inside kicked up like a maelstrom before floating downwards, slow but serene. Eri couldn't stop gushing.

"I can never get enough of these things," she breathed, eyes like stars as she looked on. "They're so pretty. You're so lucky you have one."

"Well, I don't intend to hog this one all to myself. Let's place it somewhere as a decoration."

"Good idea! Um, is that all there is in the box?"

Tossing out the remaining layer of peanuts from inside revealed a birthday card.

"Shouldn't cards be placed on the very top," I mused, "so that when you open your present, that's the first thing you'll see?"

Eri shrugged. "Maybe it migrated to the bottom during shipping. Somehow."

"Yeah… somehow."

She clung onto me from behind, wedging her chin into my shoulder so she could read the card together with me.

Rhyme wrote:

By the time you get this, it will most likely be past your birthday. Regardless, we hope you like what we got. Happy belated birthday!

Cool. Alright, Beat, you're up next. Go for it.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PHONES! BOOYAKA!

Short and to the point, just the way he liked it! Eri and I exchanged glances and chuckled.

"That's so like him!" she giggled.

"Heh… you can say that again."