She Comes And Goes As She Pleases (Part 52)
by BrDPirateMan

"How's Uncle holding up?" I asked.

Deep in the middle of exam season, I took some time off of my studies one evening to talk with my aunt over the phone. In the wake of my uncle's heart attack and subsequent surgery, I'd been calling home much more often to check up on him. From what I knew, he's still recuperating.

I could have asked him directly, but I was told he had already gone to sleep. He seemed to tire more easily these days, most likely a side effect of what happened to him. Auntie updated me on his condition in his stead.

"He's doing much better," she said. "Rehab is coming along nicely. I think we can get him to do some exercise by next week."

"I see… All in all he's okay, huh?" I peered through the curtain, looking out at the falling snow. "What about his diet? Nothing too fatty, I'm assuming?"

"He still gets his cravings for tempura now and again. You know your uncle. But at least he doesn't go nuts over not having any. And I try to give him more steamed food nowadays and he's taken to it well."

"Sounds good."

The front door opened and in came Eri, bringing with her a momentary blast of winter air. I acknowledged her with a silent nod which she returned with a smile.

Auntie posed a question. "How are your exams coming along, Neku?"

"Just fine." I absentmindedly watched Eri trot off into the kitchen. "Nothing I can't handle. Got all my lessons covered."

"You are making time for your studies, right?" This she asked with a hint of strictness. "Just because you have part-time work and a live-in girlfriend doesn't mean – "

"I know, Auntie. I'm not goofing off."

"That's what I want to hear."

The relatives who helped look after Uncle at the hospital also gave me a box of mandarin oranges. I spied Eri seated at the dining table, fingers wrestling with one.

"Alright, Auntie, that's all from me for now. I gotta get back to my revision. There's another test coming up in two days' time."

"You take care of yourself now. And say hi to Eri for me."

"Will do. Bye."

I joined Eri at the table, who was popping orange slices into her mouth. She jammed one in between my teeth.

"Oh, this one's sweet," I noted, taking my time to nom it. I reached for another orange in the table and peeled it. "I take it from how wide your grin is that today's exam went well?"

"It went splendidly. Ah, I feel good about myself. And you?"

"I think I'll be fine. When's your last test, again?"

"Next Monday."

"I'll be done by this Friday." I slipped a slice into her mouth.

"You're lucky you get to finish up earlier!"

"Yeah, I suppose."

I chomped on the last orange slice and bundled the peel into a ball. Then I turned around, took aim and with a flick of my wrist, I sent it flying towards the dustbin.

Except it didn't. It bounced off the lip of the bin and plopped onto the floor like a shattered dream.

Eri took the chance to jibe, "Lousiest curveball ever."

For some reason I couldn't think fast enough to come up with a suitable retort. I could only chuckle sheepishly and pick the peel off the floor. Just when I was about to discard it, I had an idea.

"Well, why don't you try it, huh, Eri?"

I handed the balled-up peel to her, daring her to replicate the pitcher's throw she was so insistent on seeing. Always up for a challenge, she grinned widely at me.

"Ha! Let me show you how much of a difference a woman's touch can make!"

I stepped aside, waiting for her to deliver on her promise. She adjusted her aim, taking her sweet time… making sure her x and y axes were properly lined up or whatever… Look, if a lady's touch involved spending upwards of a whole minute getting her trajectory down pat, then something's wrong. Just throw the damn thing already…

She made her move at long freaking last. An almighty throw sent the peel soaring through the air… but she was completely off her mark, and it smacked me right in the face, where it stayed stuck for a couple of seconds before sliding off comically.

All she could do in light of her terrible performance was say, "Uh… I didn't mean to do that."

I sighed, throwing it away. "If I didn't know better, I'd have thought I owed you money."

As I was getting back to my seat, I glanced at the calendar hung on the kitchen wall and was reminded of something important.

"Oh!" I tapped excitedly on this month's page, attempting to bring her attention to a certain date. "Look at this!"

She squinted at where I was pointing. "Wh-What is it? Yes, I can see you've got nice fingers."

"No, that's not it!" I huffed. "I'm trying to tell you our one-year anniversary's coming up soon. Two weeks from now. It didn't slip your mind, did it?"

"Of course I didn't forget!" she laughed. "Wow, it's hard to believe it's been almost a year since we got together! Time flies when you're having fun."

"How about I take you out to dinner? I can make reservations for a table at this fancy seafood restaurant downtown."

"Are we talking about Fugu Parlor?" There was a glint in her eyes that was but a mere glimpse at her growing interest. "I've never been there before. But I heard from a friend of mine that the food is top-notch."

"Of course it has to be," I laughed. "It's one of those high-class establishments that you only go to when you need to impress your girlfriend for your one-year anniversary."

She saw the connection right away and chuckled. "You're being real subtle about this, huh? But is it really okay for you to treat me to such an expensive dinner?"

"Hey, it's fine! My work at WildKat is paying well, and I've been saving up too." While we were talking, I circled the table and stood behind her, placing my hands lovingly on her shoulders. "So you and I can just enjoy a nice meal without feeling guilty. Okay? Promise me you won't start counting yen when we're there."

She looked back at me and smiled. "If you're so sure about that, then can I order the lobster bisque? That same friend of mine told me it's fantastic… just not so fantastic on the wallet. Um, can I really?"

"Be my guest."

"Sweet! She also said the prawn fritters are sooo good. And they have this dip that's worth killing over. Oh, I can't wait to try them out! We can have those too, right?"

"Why not?"

"Ah! Another thing! While we're at it, can we buy a car?"

"No."

My single-word reply caused her to snigger. "Are you not going to say, 'Wh-Wh-What?!'" The fact that she imitated me stammering was actually pretty funny.

"Not likely. It's called character development. Take notes."

"Ha ha ha!"

Enough of chit-chat. We both still had exam material to look over and little time to waste. Before we returned to our respective rooms and got back to cramming, we finalized the details of our anniversary celebration. I made a call to Fugu Parlor, where I managed to book a table for two easily. Eri was ecstatic.

"Now I just need to figure out what kind of dress to wear for that night!"

"Hey, we still have exams, Eri. Worry about that later."

"At least tell me your preferences, what you'd like me to wear. Anything strike your fancy? Low-cut? Halter? Strapless?"

All were viable choices. She's designed quite a few dresses, and whenever she had one finished she'd model it for me so I could give her my opinion. Giving her constructive criticism was hard because there's only so much you can give to someone who consistently looks good.

"Anything's fine by me," I said. "Just make sure you're – "

"Hey now, don't be lazy!" she chided, stabbing me lightly on the forehead. "You're going out of your way to treat me. The least I can do is have something nice for you to look at for the night. Fair's fair, right?"

I wasn't going to get out of this by simply telling her to wear something she liked. And as long as her finger was still stuck on my forehead, that was all the more so. Gotta say something…

"Some cleavage would be nice. And when I say 'some'…" Mimicking her, I poked my finger playfully into her own forehead. "…I really mean it, okay? 'Some' does not equal 'all'. Leave the 'all' for the bedroom where it belongs."

We both let go of each other, sharing a soft but affectionate chuckle.

"Low-cut it is, Neku. Look forward to it!"

"Heh… will do."

XOXOXOXOXO

Friday afternoon. I felt like a new man, all over again. And why not? Exams were over! I almost felt sorry that Eri still had an entire weekend to slog through. But hey, you win some, you lose some.

A few hours later I was at WildKat, all suited up and manning the counter. Not many customers turned up today. A lone police officer, sipping coffee. A trio of girls with tanned skin and bleached hair, fiddling with their phones. A young couple, sitting near the window… and that's it. The evening was a laid-back one, in stark contrast with the hustle and bustle going on outside. I liked the idea that time had slowed down for all of us in here.

The reverie was broken momentarily when another customer barged into our bubble of privacy. Kariya made a beeline for his usual seat at the counter.

"Yo, Phones," he greeted. "I feel like pumpkin soup. Hook me up with one."

"It'll cost you, pal," I said cheerily. "Mr H will have my head if I give out freebies."

"So I can't leech off your goodwill and kindness? I thought we're friends here."

"Sure you're my friend. But business is business."

"Well, damn. Fair enough."

He settled down for that plus a side serving of onion rings, saying that he was too lazy to cook dinner tonight. The dearth of customers allowed me to exchange a few words with him, though I was careful not to talk for too long and look like I was slacking off.

"Exams are over, huh, Phones? Bully for you."

"Yeah, it's cool. Best of all, my one-year anniversary with Eri is coming up soon."

He cast a sly grin at me. "Heh, not bad. I don't think a lot of couples out there can stay together half that long."

"Tell me about it. Eri herself dumped her ex-boyfriends around the three-month mark. Earlier if she found them to be complete jerks."

"Brutal! At least she's found the right guy now."

I smiled. "Thanks. You might just get that free pumpkin soup yet."

"Really?"

"No. Sorry. Told you, man. Business is business."

"You're beginning to sound like Grandpa H himself."

"I pray you don't call him that in front of him by accident. That won't be pretty."

"I'll watch my back. So what're you doing for your anniversary?"

I puffed out my chest, proud to boast. "A romantic dinner at Fugu Parlor."

"Damn, that place is rich people turf. I've never cast my shadow in there. Great going, Phones, great going."

I was kept on my toes with various miscellaneous duties for the evening and so I left him to eat in peace. He took his sweet time with dinner and lingered round long after I'd cleared his plates away.

Out of the blue, he spoke up, "Hey Phones, are you free tomorrow?"

"Yeah, why?"

"'Cause I have bored-itis."

I scrunched my eyebrows together, confused as my brain ground to a halt. "Wh-What the heck is… bored-itis?"

"It's when you're so bored, you have arthritis. In your brain."

It took me a couple of seconds to get what he was saying. "Oh, okay. You're bored, huh. Sure, I have time tomorrow. What's the plan? You wanna play co-op in HoZ again?"

"No, actually, I'd like to have a man-to-man chat with you about girls."

In my mind's eye, Kariya suddenly looked like he had grown an extra pair of buttocks on his face. Almost forgot that I was wiping the counter at the time.

"Kariya, uh… what?"

"I see your days with Eri have turned you into quite the ladies' man… so if it's cool with you, I'd like to hear about the experiences you've had."

"Oh, is that it? That's fine by me, but why?"

He bit his lower lip, hesitating to answer. Then, after he looked all around to check that no one was listening, he cupped one hand around the side of his mouth and whispered like he was leaking government secrets.

"The truth is, I'd like to date Uzuki."

"Oh, is that so? Okay."

Now it was his turn to be all goggle-eyed with confusion. "I-Isn't this the part where you react with surprise?"

"I had a hunch early on that you were kinda into her. Plus, Eri's been shipping the two of you non-stop, so the idea kinda stuck. I'm the last person who'd be surprised, actually."

"Heh, the way you put it, it sounds like I might have a chance… so yeah! That's why I need to talk to you, Phones! I want to put the moves on her, but I need to know I'm on the right track. And I figure someone who actually worked to get his girlfriend would be able to give me some grade A guidance."

Guidance? Wasn't he the one who dispensed a lot of the love advice I needed when I was chasing Eri? He should be able to follow his own advice, right? Maybe it's a deeper issue than I was led to believe.

"Sure," I said. "We can talk."

He beamed, brimming with gratitude. "So you'll hear me out? Great! Let's meet at my place at 2 tomorrow. I'll have pizza ready! Double pepperoni sound good?"

"Yeah, that's fine. I'm not a picky eater."

"Alright then, it's settled! Tomorrow it's gonna be a date between two manly men!"

"Please don't say things like that out loud. My clientele will get the wrong idea."

XOXOXOXOXO

Knock knock.

The door swung open, and Kariya filled up the doorway. He greeted me warmly while the smell of freshly-baked pizza from within the room wafted up my nostrils.

"I knew you wouldn't let me down, Phones. Come on in! There's pizza waiting for you."

"Double pepperoni?"

"Like I promised," he said with a wider grin.

"Sweet."

We broke the ice by pigging out on pizza and talking about odds and ends, like my newly completed exams and the latest news on Gynoid Dreams. He was even nice enough to ask about my uncle. Then we got down to business.

"Phones," he began, "you know what I said about Uzuki, right?"

"Yeah, you have it real bad for her."

"I'm gonna ask her out on a date and then hopefully I can wing it from there with the boyfriend thing. But I need to get that first step right. Now, I've never dated anyone before, but I'm not completely blind when it comes to these sorts of things. I know some do's and don'ts. How else was I able to give you advice in the first place?"

"So you know the basics?"

"Uh-huh, most of them."

"What're you looking to do for your date, then?"

He puffed out his chest as he spoke, apparently proud of that he had given his plans a great deal of thought.

"I'll take her to a ramen shop for a meal. Nothing too fancy yet, gotta start simple, you know? No rush!"

I spent a few seconds to digest what he just said, then offered him an alternative. "I like your way of thinking, but I think a café would be better. The ambience is more suited for dates. Ramen shops can get too… noisy."

He was in total agreement with that. "Oh yeah. Right then. I'll look around for a café with an affordable menu."

"Say, what do you normally talk to her about?"

"Whatever comes to mind. We talk about all sorts of stuff."

"Well, so long as you don't bore her to death during the date. If she's not crazy about transforming mecha, then for goodness' sake stay away from that topic like the plague."

"I know that much at least," he huffed. "What do you take me for?"

"I just wanted to be sure you can keep the momentum of the date going without having to resort to, say… talking about which character has the best boobs in your favourite anime."

"Oh please. Everyone knows Minori from Artemis Command packs the best rack – uh, oops."

"See what I mean?" I sighed. "Don't do that."

"Sorry, force of habit. Won't happen again, I promise."

"And another thing."

I leaned forward slightly, eyes stern and narrowed. "Whatever you do, don't ever check out other girls during your date. I know bird-watching is fun, but that's only when you're single. If you're gonna hook up with someone, you better make sure they're the only person you look at."

He laughed. "Don't worry, I know that! My skirt-chasing days are officially over once I go out with Uzuki." Patting himself on the chest, he announced with confidence, "I won't stare for more than two seconds at any other female body part, clothed or not!"

Bold claim there. But whatever reservations I had about him being faithful evaporated when, mimicking my serious gaze, he made his intentions clear:

"Look, you're probably wondering how someone like me can set my mind on dating one chick when I've got a bad habit of macking on several others. Truth be told, I don't know how I'm gonna convince you, but… let's just say I've known Uzuki longer than anyone else and I know a good girl when I see one. And she's not a bad person at all. So I think if I'm gonna spend my days with someone, it might as well be her."

Was I wrong to judge him by how he usually acts? Maybe he really can clean up his act if he tried. I decided to stop being so judgmental and gave him my full support.

"I don't claim to know the history you share with her," I said, "but you know her best and you're free to pursue whoever you like. So best of luck to you, pal. I'll be rooting for you."

He grinned. "That's what I like to hear."

We spent the next hour discussing and fine-tuning the details of his date plan. He asked me various questions, from what best to wear to whether a window seat would be ideal. Some of his queries were rather tricky to answer and I found myself stumped at times, but all in all we'd worked out something good and I could give him my stamp of approval with a clear conscience.

"So if she offers to go Dutch," he said, "I offer to foot the bill…"

"And after you two part ways for the day, make sure you write her a message when you get home and tell her you had fun."

"I think I got all of that."

"Just be yourself and stay away from the anime talk and you'll do fine."

"If on the off chance she asks about my hobbies, I'll talk about them, but not in too much detail. Don't wanna bore her to death."

"And that's it!" I said with a smile. "Lesson's over. You're good to go."

He gave me a rough but friendly pat on the back. "Thanks! This will be a big help, Phones!"

"Heh, don't thank me yet. Save it for when your first date is a success."

His confidence took a momentary dip. "I don't know how Uzuki will react. It's likely she may not dig the whole relationship angle in the first place. She may want us to stay friends. But if I don't do something I won't get anywhere. I mean, I've wanted to do this since forever."

"It'll be fine. She won't hate you for trying. I'd like to see things work out between you two, but even if it doesn't, she'll still respect you as a buddy and partner."

"Okay, that sounds fair. That I can get behind." He stretched his arms above his head. "Yeah, I feel like I can do this!"

"That's the spirit!"

"…There's just one teeny tiny problem."

"Uh? Wh-What's that?"

He bit his upper lip with his bottom teeth. "The café idea is nice, but I just remembered that I probably won't be able to afford that…"

Puzzled, I scratched my head. "Are you short on cash or something?"

"Yup."

"Is it that bad? How much money do you have left?"

You could practically smell the guilt off of him. "I'm, uh, about 3000 yen shy of being flat broke. There was a sale on Metal Warrior Girls merchandise – 20% discount off all models in the MW001 Series – and, well, I blew most of my money buying them. So right now, the only date I feel I'll be able to afford for Uzuki is one at a ramen shop."

I stared at him, mouth agape.

"You bought what?!"

"On the plus side," he added hastily, "the complete MW001 Series is now mine! I've wanted to get my hands on the Generation One Girls for the longest time and now here they are! Groovy, huh?"

He swept his hand in the direction of the bookshelves, inviting me to feast my eyes on his newly bought – and assembled – plastic toy models. It was an impressive collection, but all I saw was nothing to be proud of, only a reminder of how bad he was with money management.

"Kariya," I sighed, exasperated, "look here. You – "

"And as a bonus, you can flip up their skirt armour and check out their panties! I like the striped ones – "

"I don't care about that!" I snapped, causing him to shrink visibly. "Did you make yourself penniless buying toys?!"

"They're not just mere 'toys'. Don't you dare insult my waifus!"

This time I sighed louder and slapped my forehead for good measure. "Dude, I'm being serious here. I'm trying to tell you that you can't have dates on a shoestring budget. This isn't some romantic comedy where the impossible can happen."

Kariya sobered up quickly, recognizing the dire straits he was in. But I had one more crushing truth to add to his reality check.

"Never mind going on dates," I said. "How are you going to survive the month?"

"I'll be okay as long as I stick to the ol' instant noodle diet. Instant noodles three meals a day till I get my next paycheck… Yeah, I think I can handle it."

"Good god, man. You'll kill yourself eating like that. Though I can't say you didn't have it coming."

He laughed weakly against my biting sarcasm. "Ouch. Dealt a solid blow there, Phones. I felt it in my ribs."

"You can't take Uzuki out on a proper date like this. Wait till you get paid."

"No, there is a way!"

"I'm not lending you money, Kariya."

He spluttered, "H-How did you know I was going to ask you that? Ah, man. Now I'm really in a pinch here…"

When I promised myself that I'd repay the kindness he's shown me, I had no intention to do so by lending him money. But I couldn't help but feel sorry for the state he'd gotten himself in, even if it was a result of his own stupidity. After a difficult debate within my head, I decided to bend the rules a bit.

He was still off in his little world, counting his yen and trying to see how far down the month he could go with his limited funds.

"…so if I buy the 150 yen instant ramen, I can get 20 cups. But that's barely enough for a week… Crud. I guess I got no choice but to get the yucky 100 yen one…"

"Dude, quit your mental math for a sec," I huffed, taking out my wallet. As soon as he saw it, hope flashed in his eyes in a glorious blaze. I swear, his whole head could catch fire just from that alone.

"Phones… are you…? Oh man, you're a lifesaver!"

He reached out with both hands like a starving man – a fitting analogy indeed – but I pulled back my hand holding the cash, saying firmly, "Just this one time, pal. And I need money for my one-year anniversary dinner date, so 5000 yen is all I can spare. Also, I expect to be paid in full as soon as you get your next payment."

"You have my word, man!" And he snatched the money so fast I didn't know my hand was empty until I looked. "5000 yen is enough for around three weeks of ramen! Add in the 3000 yen I have left and I can last around a month!"

"You probably won't have enough money for a date, but at least you'll survive."

"Ugh…" Reality was a harsh mistress. His excitement was hampered once more, but he knew where he stood and decided not to overstep his boundaries. "You're right. Oh well, no choice but to wait till next month."

"I hope you've learnt your lesson. And try saving up some money at least."

With nothing more that I could do for Kariya, I left him to his devices. I'd helped him the best way I could; the rest was up to him.

XOXOXOXOXO

Monday evening marked the end of Eri's exams and she gleefully spent the next few days trying out different outfits in preparation for our anniversary dinner. But she still couldn't find the one that would work for her. It's the indecisive person's greatest battle: this dress or that dress?

Oh well, nine or ten days is a long time to choose a piece of clothing. I could wait.

In the meantime I had some shopping of my own to do. I was hopping all around Shibuya, looking for the one shop that would satisfy my needs. None so far has fit the bill. I took a break at a fast-food restaurant to ponder my next course of action.

Then my cell rang.

"Oi, Phones. It's me, Kariya. Guess what!"

"What happened?"

"I made a bet with a friend of mine and managed to win another 5000 yen off of him! Boy, am I glad he sucks at Tin Pin!"

I didn't know what to feel about this turn of events. On one hand, it's good that his quality of life could improve a tiny bit this month; on the other hand, the means with which he achieved this was… well, less than honest and not exactly foolproof. A more sensible person would have chosen a surer way of getting cash, like part-time work. But then again, this is the laziest guy in Shibuya we're talking about here…

"You really want that date, huh?" I said. "What I'd like is to tell you not to rush things, but if you're sure you can pull this off, then go ahead."

"Oh, you bet I will. In fact, I already asked her out!"

"Wow, someone's a fast worker. Did Uzuki say yes?"

"Yeah! It took a lot of persuasion, but I kept the pressure on and here we are now! Anyway, I'm taking her out to a coffee shop this afternoon so wish me luck!"

There's no mistaking the excitement pouring out from the other end of the line. Personally, I thought that Kariya and Uzuki made for an odd couple, but then who was I to talk? If someone had told me five years ago that I would end up dating Eri of all people, I would have laughed in their face.

Maybe this could work out after all…

"Alright pal, good luck," I said. "And do your best; Uzuki isn't an easy girl."

"Yeah, I know. No hitting the reset button here. Anyway, thanks, man! I'll slide you the juicy details real soon."

"Can't wait to hear 'em."

I hoped everything would be alright with them. Neither of them seemed very fluent with relationships…

XOXOXOXOXO

The situation with my two Reaper friends was never far in my mind. Kariya had successfully taken the first step with Uzuki. So what's next for these two seemingly incompatible people?

Once Eri got wind of this development, there was no stopping her imagination from running like a high-speed train with the brakes removed.

With a dreamy sigh, she mused, "I sure hope Kariya has done the 'trap the girl against the wall' shtick by now. That maneuver is worth at least a thousand points!"

"Points? What points?" I sniggered. "And with Uzuki? Nah, not gonna happen. She'll sooner kick his nuts than let that happen."

"Okay, fine, maybe not on the first date. But when the feels are in the air, he'd better not waste time!"

"I wonder what made her agree to go on a date with him. She's the last person who can stand him."

"You did say they've been pals for years. When you're close enough to someone, isn't it natural for some feelings to develop?"

What she said suddenly reminded me of how I began to fall in love with her. We did start off as friends… but you know how the story goes by now.

Our little chat soon evolved into a lively debate. We took stabs at when they'd officially go out. Based on their differing personalities we tried to guess when Uzuki would be willing to give Kariya his first kiss. She even roped me into participating in a three-part, fifteen-minute discussion on the importance of unicorns in their love lives (please don't ask). I ended up being even more invested in their relationship than I thought I would.

And then of course we had to delve into topics of a less… wholesome nature. No prizes for guessing who started it.

"…and then when that time comes," she said, "she'll totally pull off a role reversal, and she'll be the one on top! I can already see it!"

"I dunno. That sounds unlikely. She likes guys who take the initiative. If anyone's gonna be on top, it'd be him, not her."

"I still stand by my opinion. She's a top for sure. Unless they're both standing."

"S-Standing?"

Suddenly struck by a rare moment of clarity, she shot me a question, "By the way, remind me again how we got to this point?"

"It was your idea to discuss sex positions!"

The doorbell rang, putting an end to all that dirty talk – a good thing, seeing as it was getting too weird. Through the peephole I saw Kariya. I thought at first that he was here to boast about his date, but when I saw he wasn't at his happiest…

"Yo, guys," he greeted, trying his hardest to smile, "Sorry, I'm not intruding on your 'us time', am I?"

I shook my head. "N-No, but what brings you here?"

"It's about the date. Say, could I come inside for a bit? This is kinda important."

What was it about this date that warranted visiting us at this time of the night? It's almost freaking ten o'clock! Eri busied herself in the kitchen preparing tea for all of us.

"Alright," I began, "what's the matter?"

"I… uh, I think I might have messed up."

"What? Did you forget to do something?"

"Hmmm… how should I put this…"

I can't say I've seen him looking so lost before. Despite his kooky behaviour, I was confident he could pull it off to great – if not, satisfactory – effect. It's just a simple date at a coffee shop. What could go wrong?

After Eri came back to the living room with our tea, she sat down with us and together we listened to Kariya's story.

"As far as I can tell," he said, "I did nothing wrong. No blunders, no glaring faux pas, nothing of the sort. But it doesn't feel like anything has changed between us."

I shrugged. "Well, you only started dating…"

"But here's the thing." He ran a hand through his hair. "Uzuki and I hang out a lot as it is. Most times, we go and grab a bite at a ramen shop or a fast-food restaurant. Or we may go to a music store and check out the latest albums. What I'm saying is, this date felt… ordinary, you know? Like another one of our usual outings. There's nothing about today that sets it apart from what we usually do."

"Hmmm… so it didn't feel like a date?"

"Exactly."

Eri asked, "How did you ask her out? Maybe you went about this the wrong way in the first place."

Pausing for thought, he stared into his cup for answers. "I don't know about that, but it went something like this…"

"What?" Uzuki wasn't sure what she heard. "Come again?"

Kariya repeated his words. "Will you go out with me?"

"Go out… with you?"

Few things could catch her off-guard. This was one of them. For a second or two, she simply stared at him like a statue. While she racked her brains for something to say, he took the opportunity to drill the facts into her head further.

"Uh, I'm just saying that if you don't mind, will you go out with me? On dates and stuff. You know. Um… will you?"

There was a barely noticeable stutter in her voice as she struggled to maintain calmness. "This… This is so sudden. I don't know what to say."

Fear welled up in his throat like a lump. The fear of rejection. The fear that he might get snubbed in the face. The fear that he won't be able to remain friends with her if he botched it all. But he didn't want to just leave this hanging when he had come so far. And if he was to finish what he started, then he might as well give it his best effort.

"I told you, Uzuki… I'm into you something awful, and I mean it. All I ask is a chance to prove that I can be a good boyfriend to you. I'm sorry if I freaked you out."

And he gave her his best, most sincere face. Set the jokes aside so she'd know he meant business. Anything he could think of to make her believe him. It must be working, because her sarcasm disappeared completely. She would usually have a sharp remark for every word he uttered, but not this time. Things were different.

As she stood there with her mind all muddled, he continued, "You're not sure what to make of this. I get that. And maybe I'm not suave at all, but please… one chance is all I need."

Gathering her thoughts, she cleared her throat. Finally she had something to say. "Okay, I'm going to be blunt but let's get one or two things straight. You don't exactly have the best track record when it comes to being 'serious', so I have no idea what you have in store for me. All I know is that if you really mean it… if you really want to get into a relationship with me… then I'm willing to give you that chance."

"Really?" His face brightened considerably. "You… You will?"

"But if at any time the whole thing doesn't pan out, I'd like for us to still remain friends. No animosity, no hard feelings."

"Yeah, okay, that's cool!"

"Also, I expect you to put some effort into this. If you want a relationship, then work for it and don't slack off. So can you promise me that, Kariya? If you can, then we'll see what you can do."

He placed a fist over his heart to show his earnestness. "You have my word. So, uh… are you free later this afternoon?"

"That's the gist of it," said Kariya, ending his tale. "And in the end, she agreed to go out with me, so… that's good, I guess. But it still doesn't feel like we're going out."

Eri beamed widely. "It sounds like you handled it pretty well though! I like that!"

"Thanks." He flashed her a brief smile which gave way to a disappointed sigh. "Still, man, that was the least romantic date if I ever saw one. I just wanted to give it a little of that lovey-dovey magic, you know? Maybe flirt a bit, hold hands and stuff. But I simply didn't dare."

"You made the right call there," I said. "It'd probably have gone south if you rushed things. It's a little too soon to be holding hands."

"Yeah, you're probably right. Maybe I was getting ahead of myself – "

"But we can't just leave things as they are!" exclaimed Eri, startling us both. "It's fine to take things slow, but dither too much and you'll get nowhere. The trick is to keep the pressure on, but with subtlety."

"Subtlety?"

"A little physical contact goes a long way! You don't need to hold hands to make a difference. Even patting her on the shoulder now and again and maintaining eye contact can do wonders to tear down the wall she's built around herself. She's not dumb. She'll notice. Just don't overdo it or she'll get seriously put off."

"Oh yeah!" The lightbulb moment arrived for Kariya. "Damn, girl, those are some sweet protips!"

"However," she said, arms folded, "you're facing a more fundamental issue here. It sounds to me like you and Uzuki are too scared to move things forward. That's why you feel like nothing's happening between you two."

He shrugged helplessly, holding out his hands. "It's not like I can do much about it, you know. She might bolt if I try anything too daring with her. And you know how strict she already is! No, if I'm gonna do anything, it'll have to be slow and steady."

"I'm all for the cautious approach but I think you're overthinking it. For all you know, she's just as willing as you are to try new things."

"Her? I don't know…"

"Sure," I said, "but you never know till you try, right?"

"What's more," added Eri, "it was you who said she wanted you to put in some effort. She's not just waiting for you to make your move, she's prepared for it!"

Those words proved to be the ones that spoke to him the most. As he reflected upon her wisdom, his previously wavering self-confidence grew. It wasn't an immediate tenfold growth, but he looked like he could handle things himself a little better. He had a long way to go but he was getting there.

"Okay," he said, "you guys may be onto something. I won't hesitate next time!"

"Yeah!" Eri pumped a fist into the air. "That's the spirit!"

"Soonest chance I get, I'm gonna push her down!"

"Yeah, push her down!"

Alarmed, I hurried to rein them in. "Hoi! Kariya, you're going too fast! And don't encourage him, Eri!"

"This just in, everyone." The entire room bristled with her energy as she tried to pull us into her sphere of cheeriness. "I think I have just the thing to help bring you two closer!"

"Ooh, what is it?" He was all ears. "Handcuffs and a riding crop?"

Before I could snap at him to stop messing around, Eri excitedly remarked, "Why don't you take her to the ice skating rink downtown? You any good with skating?"

"Depends. I'm no good skating with my feet. On my butt I can just about manage a figure eight."

"Hee hee… then you should be just fine! Even if the two of you mess up and fall all over the place, it's all part of the fun. Just make sure you're a gentleman and help her up if she falls down."

He rubbed his chin. "Hmmm… I should probably practice a little. Heh… if all else fails, I can always butt-slide my way into her heart! …Just kidding."

I groaned. "'Butt-sliding' is a thing now, huh?"

"I'll never forget this, guys. You have no idea how much this helps!" Grateful for the tips and tricks, he shook our hands like he meant to tear them off. Eri's frame quivered like she was sitting on a pneumatic drill, but she didn't mind.

"Be sure to come back with good news!"

"I will!"

Armed with a renewed sense of hope, he bid us goodnight and left. Eri was absolutely delighted at this turn of events and couldn't stop squeeing. Her frothing excitement was quite amusing, I had to admit. I was all for them getting together too, but I didn't match her manic optimism. Surely it couldn't be that easy. I should know. The road ahead would be long and hard.

That didn't stop her from envisioning the best case scenario though. "I can see it now! I just know both of them will have so much fun on their next date! Uzuki's a tough nut to crack, but he'll win her over… and that's when the fun begins."

"You make it sound so easy," I sighed. "But I don't think it works that way."

I walked to the bathroom intending to brush my teeth, and she followed to keep the conversation going.

"Nothing's ever easy, Neku. But come on! Ice skating! Everyone loves ice skating. Uzuki will be thrilled! I know I would."

"I don't know, Eri… I get the feeling she'd rather do something quiet for her dates, not move about and exercise."

"She had no issue playing beach volleyball with us during our summer vacation getaway, though."

"Fair enough." I carefully coated the head of my toothbrush with toothpaste. "Anyway, I just hope he doesn't tire her out with his antics, that's all. He has a knack for pushing her buttons and it's a habit he can't quite get rid of."

"Oh, it'll be swell. You worry too much!"

Things became quiet when I started to brush my teeth. Shaka-shaka-shaka. The bathroom was quiet except for the sound of my toothbrush in my mouth. And in the silence as she watched me go about my business, she had a thought.

"Um, Neku?"

I mumbled a reply. "Mmngh?"

"Is… Is Kariya going to be okay?"

"Nnuu-urgh?"

"Now that I think about it, there's actually so many things that could go wrong with his date."

"Unff mnng gnngh, gurgugh." I meant to say, "No kidding, Sherlock."

"Shouldn't we, you know, watch over them to make sure it all goes according to plan?"

I quickly finished up and rinsed out my mouth so I could reply properly. "Watch over them how? Don't tell me we're going to tail them."

"Well, how else are we going to check up on them? We need to be close by at least!"

"I'm not gonna be a stalker. Let them have their privacy. It's their date, not ours."

"If they never know we're around, it'll be fine! We could disguise ourselves or something. It'll be a cinch! Have you forgotten that I used to cross-dress as Shibuya's sexiest male butler?" In her Seishirou-sama getup, you wouldn't know it's a girl underneath all that fake manliness. It was that good.

However, I wasn't interested in changing my look, much less peep on my friends' date.

I wiped my face dry with a towel. "Eri, I know you mean well. I owe them a lot for their kindness and I'd like for them to have a marvelous time too. However, I feel that this date is something they need to experience for themselves in its entirety, warts and all."

"But I don't want it to be perfect. I just want to help make it a little smoother for them. Give them a hint here, lend them a hand there…"

"There's not one couple out there who's had it smooth-sailing from start to finish. Throughout the relationship, you can expect them to argue, to disagree on things, to make decisions they regret. They'll feel bad about it, but if they can find it in themselves to forgive each other and move on, then that's fine. I guess what I'm trying to say is, while it's sweet that you want the best for Kariya and Uzuki, it's probably better they carry the relationship forward under their own power. Don't get me wrong, though… We will help them if they really need it, but right now? Let's leave them to it and see how it goes."

Eri wanted to protest, but kept quiet. She had a lesser-practiced habit of nibbling on the knuckle of her index finger whenever she weighed the meaning of someone's words, and right now she was doing a lot of nibbling. I think she probably agreed with me.

"Just in case you forgot," I added, "we were much the same way as they are now. In our own awkward flailing way, we managed to create all kinds of memories. There're good ones and bad ones, but that's what makes it all so interesting, right?"

"The awkward one is you, not me." She poked me on the nose playfully.

"Hey, you've got your moments too," I retorted. "Remember that time at the pool when you went to the men's changing room by mistake?"

"Aw man, you had to bring that up. Heh heh!" Her bashful giggles just screamed "Oops!" "I didn't realize it until I was done changing. Luckily no one was inside at the time."

"And I had to go collect your bag for you too. I remember that one guy who looked at me funny, wondering why I had such a girly-looking bag."

"It was a ridiculously pink bag too! But hey, fun times!"

I rolled my eyes at her and she laughed.

"Anyway, you're right," she continued. "I shouldn't interfere in their love lives, even if it's out of generosity. Maybe it's best to let the romance play out by itself, and if they can do it without our help, then all the better."

"Damn straight. Let's just wait and see, huh? I know you're impatient but you can't rush love."

"True that!"

Whether they sank or swam… that's their call.

XOXOXOXOXO

The days leading up to our much-awaited anniversary dinner were fraught with excitement. Every time we marked off a day on the calendar we'd get all giggly about it like a couple of idiots. I had a chunk of my savings set aside for this day and made sure not to touch it. Eri had better get that dress ready… but knowing her I was confident I won't be disappointed!

Turns out we weren't the only ones with our breaths hitched and fingers crossed, albeit for a different reason.

It's been around a week since Kariya's first date. He called me up with an important request, asking me to meet him right away at his place.

"Good, good! Glad you could make it." He looked like he was in a hurry. "Come in, time is short. Oh, you are free, right?"

"Uh, I guess." I closed the door behind me. "What do you – "

"Great!" He didn't bother to listen to the rest of what I wanted to say, and with speed and urgency in his voice he continued, "Listen, I followed your suggestion from last week to take Uzuki to the ice skating rink. And it's happening. It really is happening."

"You secured another date with her?"

"Yup!"

I wasn't even going to ask how he got the money for that. He probably hoaxed his Tin Pin-challenged friend out of another bet.

"Oh, and before you ask, I won some more money from another bet. Let's just say it involves backgammon, anime trivia and peanut butter. It's a long story. It's also… not pretty."

I'll take his word for it. Whatever it was, I was glad not to hear about it.

"Anyway," he resumed, "the date's today."

"Today? You mean, like, right now?"

"Right now. In forty minutes to be exact. He scrounged around inside his cupboard. "Here, catch."

He tossed me something, which I caught in my hands. It looked like a headset, the kind that's slung around one ear, except it was heavily customized – the microphone was shortened to a mere stump, for example. The workmanship was slightly shoddy, giving off the impression that it was the project of some amateur hobbyist as opposed to an actual retail product, which as it turns out was exactly that.

"Careful with that," he warned. "Friend of mine lent it to me. It's his baby."

"Then don't go round tossing it."

"I tossed it carefully," he retorted. "You just need to be more careful catching it. Anyway, Phones, you're going to help me out."

"What, with this?"

"Yeah."

He produced a similar headset – the second of a pair, and here he finally explained the details of his request.

"Now, I'm fairly confident in my dating skills as you know, but if I come across anything that I can't handle, that's where you come in."

"I-I'm gonna be your chaperone?"

"No, dammit," he sighed, exasperated that I was slow on the uptake. "Don't you know it's blasphemy to have a third wheel tag along on a date? I just need you to observe our date from nearby and give me pointers via the headset, but you need to be in disguise or she'll catch on."

Gee, that sounds familiar. Eri, someone might have plagiarized your ideas…

"Um, why me?" I asked.

"I should think you'd know the reason to that by now! Aren't you the dating pro here? Makes sense it'd have to be you. You're the brains here!"

"Yeah, but – "

"Wear that headset, Phones. Like this." He plugged his into his right ear as a demonstration. "This will help us to communicate with each other out on the field."

"Kariya…"

"And make sure you're unseen. Wear a hoodie or something, hide your face. I'm gonna wear mufflers to hide my ears. Don't act suspicious. Just chill and act normal."

"Kariya."

"Oh crud," he yelped, glancing at his watch, "not much time left. Get ready, Phones! I'll see you at the rink real soon."

"Kariya!" Now I was waving my arms like a windmill. "Hold on a minute!"

"We can't hold on! Uzuki will kill me! She already hates it when I'm late for work. No way is she going to tolerate me being late for a date!" And he started to push me towards the door.

"We can spare five minutes! Look, I just wanna say something."

The grumble he made in response made him sound like a cow. But he relented. "Okay, but make it quick!"

I steeled myself to give him a dose of brutal honesty. Because that's what he needed most right now.

"Dude," I began, "there's no need for us to do this."

"Of course there is!" His tone was firm, almost indignant, as he went into a rant. "Phones, I ain't gonna mess this one up. I'm going to make this date perfect, so I'm counting on you to provide me with on-site help when I need it. I mean, don't get me wrong, I intend to do much of the heavy lifting here, but I'm scared I'll fail when it really counts. Last thing I want is for Uzuki to think I'm scum for botching a date."

"She won't go that far," I reassured. "Is this the first time you've dated anybody, by the way?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Does she know?"

"I… y-yeah. Yeah, she does." He rubbed his arm. "We've known each other for a good while. Of course she knows."

"She also knows you're doing your best for her. She won't go too hard on you."

He snorted in disbelief. "Her, the slave driver, giving me a handicap? I don't think fate is that kind, Phones."

"You know her better than I do, and even I know she's just strict, not unreasonable. She won't blow her top just because you're not well-versed in the finer arts of dating. Besides, she's just as much of a greenhorn as you are."

My words seemed to reach him. Maybe not completely, but perhaps now I could put him at ease somewhat.

"Now that's food for thought," he said. "Totally slipped my mind that she might be the newbie here. Heh, a couple of noobs dating? That actually has a nice ring to it somehow…"

"You're shortchanging yourself, Kariya. If you're savvy enough to give me advice, then you can ace this date by yourself with few problems. I know you can do this."

Slowly but surely he began to see the light.

"You totally don't need that headset," I said, returning it to him. "Stop worrying so much and have fun!"

"Well, I'll be damned. That's the thing I needed most after all: the courage inside of myself, not some cheap dingy walkie-talkie. Hell yeah, let's do this!" Beaming, he detached his headset, leaving it on his table.

"You've saved me again, Phones." He shook my hand, thankfully a lot less violently than before. "Heh, seriously though, what was I thinking? I even had to do a favour or two for that friend of mine to get these headsets. I'm such an idiot, ha ha ha!"

"Laugh at yourself later. You still got a date to catch."

His date tightened at those words. One look at his watch and he was ready to fly.

"Gotta go!"

Kariya and I parted ways. Off to the skating rink he went, and that was that.

Or at least that's what I thought at first.

Since I was right there, I paid a visit to the convenience store downstairs to grab some supplies. I took ten minutes looking for snacks and returned to my apartment with a bagful of junk food.

"I'm back," I called out. "Bought some tidbits."

Eri was nowhere to be seen. I thought she might have left to go shopping while I was out, but then the note she left on the dining table caught my attention…

Hi Neku! it read cheerily. So it turns out Kariya scored a date with Uzuki today (he called me up to get me to wish him luck, you see). I'm heading over to the skating rink as we speak to check things out secretly. What can I say, I'm a voyeur. Catch you later, sexy. Eri XOXO

Glancing through the note on the first pass, I was filled with alarm. As soon as I read that she was going to observe Kariya's date first-hand, I immediately thought that she was going to interfere, despite my insistence that she stayed her hand. But then I saw the keyword "secretly". Hmmm, so she's just going to peep on them and that's it? I couldn't say I approved of her actions, but as long as she kept her distance, it'd be fine. Nothing to worry about.

Yeah, it would be fine… Would…

Should be fine, anyway.

Might be fine.

C-Could be fine…

Oh, what the hell! When you get to saying "could", something's not right! Was Eri ever one to mind her own business?! I should probably head there myself to make sure that busybody didn't become too much of a nuisance.

There goes my peaceful afternoon…

…

Author's note: This was originally going to cover the content in what is going to be Chapter 53, but it got too long which is why I had to split it up. So Chapter 53 should hopefully not take too long to finish, since much of it has already been written.

The focus of the story has always been on Neku and Eri, but this time I decided to switch things up a bit by putting Kariya and Uzuki in the spotlight. My aim is to flesh out their backstory and evolve them into characters with legitimate depth, as opposed to being just friends of Neku's. So hopefully by the end of the next chapter everyone will have a better appreciation for these two characters.

So please do stick around for Chapter 53! Bye!