Akari had been happily enjoying her pudding. It's a weekend, and she was supposed to be spending her time shopping and having fun. She'd stopped to eat pudding, and it was good pudding, too! But then some random high schoolers from another school just had to come and ruin her peace! They'd slapped her pudding out of her hands. What a waste! It was so good!

"My pudding!" Akari exclaims.

One of the high schoolers sneers.

"Hey!" Akari yells. "What made you think it was acceptable to ruin such perfectly good pudding? Huh?"

"Excuse me? You questioning us, bitch?" One high schooler growls.

"Yes, I am!" Akari stomps her foot. "I'm questioning how dare you ruin pudding?"

A high schooler raises a hand to smack her, when a hand grips his arm. It's a senpai Akari recognizes from Kunugigaoka High. "Hey, you shouldn't raise a hand to a lady," the senpai says firmly.

The other high schooler growls. In fact, his companions growl too.

"Oi! I can take care of myself!" Akari scowls, pointing a finger at her Kunugigaoka senpai. "And don't butt in!"

Her senpai looks at her, raising an eyebrow.

Another senpai approaches her from behind. He gently grabs her arm and attempts to pull her away.

"No!" Akari screeches. "They need to apologize for my pudding!"

"They will," one of her senpais attempts to soothe her.

"No!" Akari shakes her head vehemently. "I'm going to make him pay! I'll make him wish he was never born! I'm going to AVENGE MY PUDDING!"

A bead of sweat rolls down everyone's face.

What the fuck's wrong with her? The high schoolers think.

Now isn't the time! We're not letting you hurt yourself trying to fight guys double your size! The Kunugigaoka senpais think.

How they truly didn't know. After all, Akari is an assassin (an assassin with tentacles, at that). In fact, all of 3-E are assassins.

Akari breaks out of her senpai's hold, running towards the leader of the high schoolers and kicking him hard in the crotch. He goes down.

She grabs him by the shoulders and shakes him enough to make him dizzy.

"Apologize!" Akari roars. "Apologize for my pudding!"

The others rush to save their leaders, but with one deranged look from Akari, they pause.

"Apologize!" She screeches. "APOLOGIZE!"

"I'M SORRY!" The leader wails.

Akari releases him, kicking him in the crotch once more, before storming off.

Her senpais stare after her as the other high schoolers rush to their fallen leader.

Amazing, they think. Precious. Must protect.

One senpai runs after her.

"Wait! I'll buy you a new pudding!"

"REALLY? THANKS!"

That incident mentioned before was one of many.

There was also a time when Akari had been crying faux tears when her favorite café had run out of the special chocolate she liked.

She'd visited to eat her favorite, until she heard that they'd sold out. She ordered a different sweet instead, but after the waitress left she started crying crocodile tears.

"Aaaahhhhhh... Looks like there's no more for me," Akari smiled sadly.

"You can have mine!"

A hand places a plate of her favorite chocolate down in front of her. Akari looks up to see The Five Virtuosos. Koyama smiles at her.

"Hello," she says as polite as she can.

"Hello, Kayano!" Sakakibara grins.

Asano nods at her behind the other four.

Akari opens her mouth to speak, before she registers that Koyama has given her his chocolate.

Her eyes sparkle. "Thanks!"

She doesn't notice the Virtuosos- aside from Asano- melt.

She also doesn't notice Asano looking at them in disgust.

"Apologies for taking up your time, Kayano," Asano says.

"It's fine! You guys got me my favorite chocolate, so we're good!" Akari gives them an eye smile that makes the Virtuosos- aside from their leader- sigh happily. Asano grimaces at them.

"Anything for you!" Seo nods his head. Araki nods his head along with the aforementioned boy.

"Anything for one of the school's precious babies!" Sakakibara chirps. Akari halts her movements. Asano sighs and buries his face in his hands. "Ren," his voice has a tone of warning, Akari can tell even through the muffled sound it creates when escaping through the cracks of his fingers.

"Excuse me," Akari starts calmly. "Did you say I was one of the school's precious babies?"

Sakakibara nods.

"Yes!" Araki pipes up. "All of 3-E are the school's precious babies! Well," he adds quickly. "Asano is too."

Asano lets out another heaving sigh.

Akari pities him.

"I am not," Asano says flatly. "Anyone's precious baby."

Akari nods in acquiescence.

"Aw, don't be like that, Gakushuu," Koyama says. Asano scowls as Akari raises an eyebrow. "You are to call me Asano," Asano snaps. The Virtuosos turn to her.

"Kaede, tell him to let us call him Gakushuu," Seo says. Akari vaguely feels like a mother settling an argument between her children. "You can't call me Kaede. It's Kayano," she says. "Also, I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to call him Gakushuu."

Asano gives her a grateful look.

The Virtuosos pout.

"They called me Kaede," she explains to her class the next morning. "And they called Asano Gakushuu, too."

"I know," Karma says blandly. "They called Asano and I by our given names last week."

He's sent pitying looks by the rest of the class.

"Trust me," Karma says. "Araki wiped my chin when juices started leaking from my mouth. It was... Ugh."

The class sighs in unison.

"Poor Asano," Hara says. "At least we don't have to deal with it in class. He deals with it nearly 24/7, what with being in the main campus and having The Virtuosos."

3-E nods. They pity their fallen soldier, who'd been in the same situation.

Akari sighs.

"May Asano rest peacefully in his grave," she says solemnly.

"May he rest in peace," Nakamura nods.