Chapter 111
"Do you have more images, I need a different angle" said Kate becoming a bit hystrerical. "Give me a sec" said the tech. "Hurry up please" said Kate tapping the desk with her fingers. "Dr Altman's in surgery, she wants to know if this can wait" said Abby as she entered the room. "Uh... I guess. How long will she be?" asked Kate. "An hour maybe" said Abby. "Okay... Abby let's get her to X-ray and MRI... and we may need a PET scan. Start her on an IV and make sure she's nill by mouth until we know what our plan of action is. Get at least 3 more tubes of blood" said Kate. "Is she okay?" asked Abby concerned. "That's what we're trying to figure out" said Kate looking at more images. She ordered some more blood tests. "Try and keep her sedated as long as possible please. I don't want her waking up and freaking out in the MRI" asked Kate. "Send me these electronically" said Kate to the tech. He turned around and started working on his computer. Kate entered the CT room as Tegan was sliding out of the tube. She took her friend's hand. "Please... please be okay" she whispered and threw her head to the sky. Tegan woke up as they lifted her onto the gurney and started pushing her towards X-ray. "Heeeey" she smiled groggily. "Hey bud... just relax okay. Close your eyes and go to sleep" said Kate. "Uh huuuhhh" grunted Tegan and closed her eyes as Abby injected something into her IV. "Can we get another BP please" said Kate looking at the heart monitor's steady and strong beeps. She was suddenly over concerned about her friend's vitals.
Sara dialed Kate's number and shook her head looking at Erin. "Still on voicemail" she said before starting to leave a message. "Hey babe, it's me... hope everything is going well. We're all done here thank God... I just phoned because I miss you... well that and we wanted to find out if you're still keen to go out to dinner tonight. We were thinking the new Asian place, or we can just go to that Mexican place you love? We just feel like having fun... being distracted for an evening you know... Not sure if Tee will feel up to after today but we're all keen if you are. Let me know when you get a chance. Talk to you later." said Sara. She was dying to finish off with "I love you" but neither of them had said it yet and she wanted it to be a bit more special than a voicemail.
The X-rays didn't take long and Tegan was being pushed into yet another scanner. The MRI. Abby handed Kate an envelope with X-ray films. "Get the machine started as soon as you can please" she asked the tech. She pushed the first X-ray into a light box on the wall. "There..." she said dejected and turned to Abby. She looked just about ready to burst into tears. "I'm sorry Kate" said Abby. "Let's not jump the gun yet..." said Kate and rolled her neck from side to side to loosen her tight neck muscles. The MRI took a lot of time but was accurate and would clarify what they saw on the CT and X-rays. Kate stared at the clock on the wall waiting for the first images to appear on screen. She knew if would still be a few minutes.
Lindsey was sitting in the cafeteria with a cup of tea at exactly the same table where she and Tegan first discussed their twins... the same table where she cried herself to sleep after Tegan's first cardiac arrest. She was nervous for Tegan's sake. She so wanted Kate to tell them that everything was fine, that the nightmare was over. That they could finally move on. She pictured Tegan smiling her gummy smile and grinned as she stared out of the window playing with her wedding ring.
"How long before we get the first images?" Kate asked the tech. "Mmm... five to ten minutes" he reported. Kate checked Tegan's heart monitor again. "I'll be right outside the door... call me when they're up" she said. She walked into the hallway and breathed deep switching on her cell phone. She listened to the voice message from Sara and closed her eyes tight. "Dammit" she whispered and pressed dial. "Hi Sara... um... yeah we're still running some tests... Listen... I think... um" said Kate becoming emotional. "I think you should come to the hospital... Sara calm down... Sara! She passed her physical with flying colours but she... well we picked up something that... something that concerns us during the CT and X-ray... Sara just calm down and breathe!... We'll have more clarity after the MRI. We're not sure what it is yet... Sara... just... listen... it could be nothing... but we're not sure" said Kate softly.
"We need to go to the hospital... now!" said Sara walking fast towards the car where Erin and Alex stood waiting for her. "What... why? What's wrong" asked Erin frantically. "I just spoke to Kate... she didn't say much but she said we should go to the hospital... they picked up something on Tegan's CT scan... and... and... fuck!" said Sara and hunched over with her face in her hands. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" she screamed stomping her foot. "Oh God no... Sara... did she say... did she say what it is? Is she okay?" asked Erin looking as if she was about to feint. "No... she said it could be nothing... they don't know yet" said Sara as she got into the car. "Dammit... please let this be nothing... please... please" whispered Sara into her hands.
Kate stared the images on screen wordlessly. "Dr Morgan... you paged" said Dr Altman as she entered the room. "I need second opinion" said Kate calmly. "Tegan?" asked Teddy. Kate nodded and looked down as Teddy put her hand on her shoulder and squeezed it. Kate showed Teddy the CT, X-ray and MRI images. Teddy looked at them all before finally commenting. "Well... there's no way of knowing for sure unless we go in" she said. "I think we should do it as soon as possible... today" she continued. Kate nodded. "Yeah..." she said softly. "I'll clear my schedule" said Teddy.
Tegan woke up as Abby was pushing her back to the room. She stared at the ceiling and the lights overhead flashing by one by one. "Hi Tegan" smiled Abby. "We'll have you back with your wife in a sec okay" she said. Tegan still felt a bit light headed after the sedation and just nodded. "Baby! There you are... all done!" said Lindsey grabbing Tegan's hand as she was pushed back into the room. "Heeeey" said Tegan groggily and smiled. "Hey sleepy head... how'd it go?" she asked Abby. "Dr Morgan will be here in a few minutes to talk to you" said Abby not looking very happy. Lindsey's face fell. "She... she's okay right" she said. "Just relax guys... Kate will be here soon" she said not giving anything away. Tegan gave a few weak coughs. "Here you go... throat feel kind of yucky?" said Abby offering Tegan a sip of water. "Just one or two sips okay" she said. Tegan closed her eyes for a few seconds composing herself. "Well... that's been real... are we done? Where's my clothes?" she asked sitting up. "Hang on Tee... not just yet" said Abby. Tegan looked at the IV in her hand and frowned. She started yanking off the monitor leads. "No no Tee... just take it easy. We'll get rid of these soon enough." said Abby reattaching leads. Tegan gave up and coughed again. "Ugh... I just want to get out of here" she sighed. "Soon sweetie" cooed Lindsey.
Sara, Erin and Alex ran into the hospital. Alex and Erin was asking around where to find Tegan. Sara looked around and saw Kate in the distance talking to another doctor. Kate noticed her "Excuse me" she said to the doctor and walked towards Sara. Sara jogged to Kate and threw her arms around her neck. "What's wrong with her" she asked as tears were running down her cheeks. "Sara... shhhh it's okay" whispered Kate. "Come with me guys" she said leading them into a waiting room. She closed the door behind her and swallowed hard. "Let's sit down for a minute" she said, trying to follow the text book approach of sharing bad news with family and friends. "No... I don't want to sit down I want you to tell me what's going on" said Sara tugging on the lapels of Kate's white coat. "We picked up three spots on Tegan's lungs" said Kate as she sat down. "What is it?" asked Sara. "That's the thing Sara... we don't know. It could just be scar tissue... some benign nodules... or it could be something more serious... infected lymph nodes although I don't think it's that... it... listen guys Tegan's lungs went through a hell of a lot of trauma as you know so..." Kate trailed off trying to find the right words. "Just tell us" said Erin. "It could be nothing to worry about or it could be something really, really serious... it could also be... it could be cancer. I'm not saying that it is but... sometimes lungs that went through trauma can be more susseptable... we just don't know yet!" said Kate. "Fuck" said Sara and started sobbing. "Sara... we're going to do a lung function test now. Then we're going to do a biopsy and we're going in with a camera to look at it. I do have some good news too! Everything else looks great! The rest of her lungs look really good. Her heart is doing just fine... Sar... everything else looks absolutely fine" said Kate squeezing Sara's hand. "Can we see her?" asked Sara. "Sure... If you can remain calm. I don't want her worrying about this too much just yet... please guys... can you keep it together?" asked Kate. "I think so" said Sara. Erin and Alex just nodded. "Go wash your face Sara... you can see you've been crying" said Kate. Sara nodded. "I'm going to speak to Tegan and Lindsey now. You can see her after the lung function test" said Kate. "Okay... Katy... please... fuck... please take good care of her" said Sara as tears started building again. "I will... I promise" said Kate hugging Sara. "What should I tell my parents?" asked Sara. "You can call them now and tell them what we suspect... or you can wait until we've done the biopsy and tell them what... what we'll know" said Kate. "They'll want to know now... they'll resent me if I don't tell them" said Sara. "It's your decision Sara. I've got to go... I'll come get you as soon as I can" said Kate and kissed Sara before leaving.
"Hey my star patient" said Kate trying her best to sound upbeat as she entered Tegan's room. "Doc... are you done... I really want to go home now" said Tegan. Kate sat down next to the bed and took Tegan's hand. "Tee... we're going to do a lung function test... and then we'll take it from there okay" she smiled. She didn't want Tegan upset before the test. "Oh... okay. Jeez this shit is taking the whole day" said Tegan annoyed. "Always so impatient" smiled Lindsey and squeezed Tegan's hand. "Okay... You've done this plenty of times... I'm sure you remember how it works but just to refresh your memory... I'm going to put this tube into your mouth and pin your nose. It's connected to this machine that's going to tell me how well your lungs are working... How much air you can take into your lungs. How much air you can blow out of your lungs and how fast you can do it. It also tells us how well your lungs deliver oxygen to your blood and the strength of your breathing muscles. I'm going to tell you how to breathe so just follow instructions okay. It's kinda uncomfortable but it will be over before you know it... unfortunately I can't give you the flying drugs for this one" said Kate. "Damn, those flying drugs were goood... Anyway... Yeah I remember it... Okay... let's get it over with" said Tegan. "Sit up for me. Linds, you can stay for this one" said Kate. She put a mouthpiece with a large tube connected to a thick tube into Tegan's mouth and a pin on her nose. "Just breathe normally for me... good" said Kate. Lindsey gave Tegan a comforting smile and squeezed her hand. "Okay now I want you to take a really deep breath and blow it out slowly... that's it... let it out all the way... good job" said Kate. Tegan closed her eyes for a few seconds. "You okay bud?" asked Kate. Tegan nodded and gave a thumbs up. "I want you to breathe normally for a while... there you go. Now take a really deep breath and let it out as forcefully as you can. Nice and hard" said Kate. Tegan did as instructed. Kate glanced over at the pulse ox reading on the heart monitor that sped up after Tegan's last attempt. "You're doing a great job Tee. Now I want you to breathe in and out fast okay. As strong as you can" said Kate. Tegan did as instructed before yanking the tube out and taking a big gulp of air. "Easy... everything okay?" asked Kate with her hand on Tegan's shoulder. "Uh huh... just felt a bit claustrophobic for a sec" said Tegan. "I'm going to nebulise you for a few minutes before repeating the test. This tube is way easier to keep in your mouth." said Kate putting the nebuliser mouthpiece in Tegan's mouth. "Just relax and breathe normally" said Kate. "You're doing great baby... hang in there" said Lindsey and kissed Tegan's hand. Tegan closed her eyes and tried to relax. She hated every second of this. The tube in her mouth made her feel nauseous and her eyes started watering. Kate repeated all the tests after a few minutes. "There we go... all done. Lung function is looking fine. Obviously not fantastic yet but it's good. All that singing seems to be helping. I'm happy with your progress" said Kate. "Okay great... is that it? Can we go now?" asked Tegan. Kate sat down on next to Tegan and took her hand. "Tegan... the scans we did earlier... they showed some spots on your lungs that we are a bit concerned about" said Kate. A bit was far from the truth but she tried to keep both Tegan and Lindsey calm. Tegan's heart rate immediately increased. "What do you mean... spots?" asked Tegan confused. "I feel great... it's nothing right?" she said. "Tee... just calm down. We don't know what they are right now... We will need to go in there and take a look at them" said Kate not telling them what it could possibly be. "We'll be doing a biopsy later today and..." Kate got interrupted by Tegan. "Hang the fuck on... what do you mean go in there... are you... are you operating on me... I don't understand... I don't... understand" mumbled Tegan. Lindsey sat wordlessly looking as if she'd seen a ghost. "We'll be doing it under anestesia... we'll be guiding a camera into your lungs and then taking a small sample... depending on what we see. We may even remove it surgically depending on what it is" said Kate calmly although she felt like sobbing inside. "No... no it's nothing... I'm fine... I'm good" said Tegan trying to get out of bed. "Tegan calm down... it's okay. It may very well be nothing... but we need to know" said Kate pushing her back down gently. "I've got you buddy" she said. "I'm going to give you a few minutes alone. The only spot we could find on the surgery schedule today is in a few hours. I want you to just try and relax until then okay" said Kate. "Uh huh" said Tegan and closed her eyes that started leaking tears. "Shhh sweetie... it's okay... everything's going to be just fine... I'm right here with you... right here" said Lindsey softly trying to remain calm for Tegan. Tegan pulled Lindsey close to her chest and breathed heavily. "Way to fuck up a great day huh... I'm scared Linds" she whispered. "I'm scared too Tegan... but you're gonna get through this just fine... just fine" she whispered. A few minutes later the door opened and Sara, Erin and Alex entered. "Hey guys" said Sara. "What are you doing here?" asked Tegan. "I'm fine you guys should go home" she said and looked away. Sara sat down on the side of the bed and took Tegan's hand in both of hers. "Tee look at me... I know... you're fine. But we're staying right here until all this is done okay" she smiled. Tegan swallowed hard trying to keep it together. "Thank you" she said and smiled a half hearted smile.
Half an hour later Kate returned with an unfamiliar female. "Guys... could you give us some time with Tegan please" asked Kate. Sara, Erin and Alex got up to leave the room. "You too please Linds" said Kate. Lindsey looked aprehensive. "It's okay boo" said Tegan. "I'll be right outside my love" said Lindsey and kissed Tegan's forehead before leaving the room. "Tegan... this is Violet Turner. She's the therapist I've been telling you about" said Kate. "Hi Tegan... it's nice to meet you" said Violet smiling. She was pretty and had a soft, kind face. Tegan immediately felt safe in her presence. "Hi Violet" she said softly. "Violet happened to be here today for another patient and she kindly agreed to come meet you and have a chat" said Kate. Tegan nodded. "I'm going to let you guys talk" said Kate and left the room. Violet sat down on the chair next to Tegan's bed. "So... how are you feeling Tegan?" she asked. "I'm good... I'm... yeah I'm good" said Tegan and looked out of the window. Violet stayed quiet for a few seconds. "Okay... I'm scared shitless... I'm confused... and I'm... I'm angry... and I'm sad" said Tegan as tears started freely flowing over her cheeks. She didn't know why and she didn't know how but Violet just opened the floodgates... mere minutes after they've met. She was soon sobbing hysterically and Violet put her hand on Tegan's back. "It's okay Tegan... it's okay to cry" she said softly.
A/N: Oh poor Tegan... Hold thumbs that everything turns out okay!