Batgirl leapt up to the bar, grabbed it with both hands, swung forward, and leapt several feet through the air before landing in a crouch. Then she jumped up to the monkey bars and swung herself forward bar by bar at impressive speeds before reaching a wooden wall with a rope. She quickly grabbed a hold of the rope and walked her way up the wall, jumping down onto the other side and standing up proudly.

All that and not a single wedgie! thought Batgirl.

This was thanks to the new suit Batman had put together for her. It largely resembled her makeshift costume, but with some practical changes. It was closer to indigo than black and was made of a heavy, almost armored material. The yellow utility belt was hooked to the spandex pants and of course was armed with actual weapons and tools. Her boots were still yellow but were now sturdy, laced up combat boots. Her cape was larger and heavier, but carried with it some utility functions as well.

"That was awesome!" cheered Robin.

"It was an improvement over your last time," said Batman.

The three were gathered around an obstacle course set up in the batcave. Batgirl had been working alongside Batman and Robin for a week or so now, but Batman was still very much treating her as a probationary ally. She had a feeling that would be the case for some time.

"Let's move on to combat training," said Batman, "Robin, this way."

Batman and Robin walked into a small clearing beside the obstacle course. The batcave was much larger than Batgirl had taken it for at first. There were entire areas of it that Batgirl hadn't seen yet. This training area was located in a cavern under the main room and consisted of an obstacle course, a clearing for sparring, target practice, and more.

"Batgirl," said Batman, "watch closely. Robin, attack me."

"Attack you? How?"

"Any way. It doesn't matter."

Robin shrugged. Then he took a step toward Batman and swung at him. Batman ducked under Robin and thrust his shoulder into Robin's gut, knocking the wind out of him as he stood up and lifted the Boy Wonder into the air. Batman grabbed one of Robin's legs and one of his arms, spun around, and slammed him onto the ground. Batgirl winced in sympathy.

"Direct attacks leave you open to reversals," said Batman, turning back to Batgirl.

Robin slowly got to his feet behind Batman.

"Was that really necessary?" coughed Robin.

"Now come at me from behind," said Batman.

"Do I have to?"

Batman grunted.

"Fine."

Robin brought his arm up and went for a chop to Batman's neck. Without turning his head at all, Batman effortlessly caught the blow. Robin yelped out in pain as Batman clutched his wrist. Batman then spun around, twisting Robin's arm and forcing him to bend forward. Batman then delivered a knee to Robin's chest, causing him to cry out and fall over.

"If you're going to attack an opponent from behind," said Batman, "be prepared that they might have the training to turn it back on you."

Batman pulled a batarang out of his utility belt and turned to Robin, who had just gotten to his feet.

"Disarm me," said Batman.

"...fine."

Robin swiftly swung his leg into a crescent kick that struck Batman's wrist and knocked the batarang away. Batgirl was impressed with Robin for a moment. Then Batman caught Robin's leg with his other hand and stepped back, pulling the leg. Robin was forced into the splits as he let out a squeal of pain.

"Never underestimate an opponent just because you've disarmed them," said Batman, "Robin, try to get away from me."

"Seriously?"

Batman stared blankly at Robin.

"Fine," sighed Robin.

Robin bolted in the opposite direction. Batman ran as well, outspeeding Robin and passing him in seconds. He rounded in front of Robin and cut him off. Robin turned on his heel to get away, but Batman caught him by the cape and jerked him back. Robin landed on his butt at Batman's feet, where Batman swiftly stomped on his chest to pin him to the ground.

"During a retreat," said Batman, "always be prepared to be cut off and plan accordingly. Don't be caught off guard or you'll end up like this."

"...I think I get it," said Batgirl, uncomfortable seeing Robin effortlessly bested so many times, "Do you think maybe we could move on to target practice? I have no training in throwing weapons so I'd like to focus on that."

"Very well," said Batman, lifting his boot from Robin's chest, "Robin, you're free to go."

Batgirl caught Robin's eyes as he slowly got up from the ground. He looked miserable. She couldn't blame him. She and he had only just started seeing each other, so the last thing he wanted was to be repeatedly bested in front of her. Batgirl had to wonder if Batman was doing this on purpose.

"Batgirl," ordered Batman, "Here. Now."

"Coming!"

"I'm just saying," whispered Batgirl, "it was pretty uncool of him."

"Yeah well," sighed Robin, "You try telling him that."

Batgirl and Robin were standing on top of a building out in the city. Batman had sent them out on patrol together. This was the closest Batgirl got to working solo. While she wished Batman would grant her more autonomy, she liked working alongside Robin too. Most nights they would break up a mugging or two. It was always easy and always satisfying. It also gave the two of them plenty of time to talk.

"I do think it was really brave," added Batgirl, "when you stood up to him for me."

"It was nothing," said Robin, turning away nervously, "I just said what needed to be said. That's all."

"I mean it," said Batgirl, "I know how terrifying he can be to stand up to."

"Batman once dove into a shark filled tank of water with his wrists tied behind his back," said Robin, "All I did was tell someone they were wrong."

"Give yourself some credit," said Batgirl, "and stop comparing yourself to him. It's not good for your confidence. Maybe that's why you haven't been able to-"

"Let's stay focused on the mission," said Robin suddenly, "We don't want to miss anything."

Robin returned his attention to his binoculars. Batgirl sighed. They'd have to talk about it eventually.

"Holy steady scofflaws, Batgirl!" exclaimed Robin, "It's them!"

"What did you just say?" chuckled Batgirl.

"Look!" said Robin emphatically, handing Batgirl the binoculars.

Batgirl took the binoculars and looked through. Robin guided her vision to a window into an apartment. Inside Batgirl saw a man sitting on his bed in his boxers, in some sort of ecstatic daze. Meanwhile, a green woman adorned with leaves and a woman in a black and red jester costume were gathering valuables and cash from around his room.

"Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy!" realized Batgirl.

"I'll cut them off at the exit," said Robin, "You contact Batman and come back me up afterwards."

"How do you know where they'll exit?"

"These buildings only have two exits," explained Robin, "The main exit through the lobby and the back exit through the basement. I'm sure they'll use the back exit to avoid attracting attention."

"How do you know the layout?"

"Batman had me memorize the layouts of the most common building plans in Gotham," said Robin, "So, you know, you have that to look forward to."

Robin fired his grappling gun and swung off. Batgirl pulled out her communicator and got a hold of Batman.

Robin landed in the alleyway where the building let out. Sure enough, Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy emerged from the door a moment later. They both seemed surprised to see him. Much to his chagrin however, they seemed more amused than concerned.

"Look who's back!" laughed Harley Quinn, "How's that hiney, bird brain? Your undies still bunched up?"

"Return those stolen goods now," ordered Robin.

"These?" said Ivy, holding up a burlap sack full of valuables, "He's not going to miss them. In fact, he happily agreed to let us take them."

"Under the influence of your pheromones no doubt," growled Robin.

"I don't know," smiled Ivy, "You tell me."

Ivy held out her hand and blew into it. Robin pulled his cape up over his face, but he knew it was no use. Poison Ivy was more than a metahuman, she was the world's greatest botanist. She had engineered a unique plant to grow off her own body. This plant could release pheromones that affected the sexual hormones in the human body. The effect was her victims becoming so aroused that they were incapable of fighting back. Robin cursed himself for letting himself get so close without preparing for that. Now he had definitely been exposed to the pheromone.

"This should be interesting," chuckled Ivy.

"Tell me about it," added Harley, "This is the most action Boy Blunder's ever had!"

"Guess again, ladies!"

Two batarangs flew down from above. One severed the sack in Ivy's hand, spilling jewelry and cash out onto the ground. Harley dodged the other one. The two looked up and saw Batgirl crouching on the side of the building overlooking the alley.

"Did she just seriously introduce herself as Robin's girlfriend?" asked Ivy.

"No, I think she introduced herself as his sidepiece," added Harley.

Batgirl growled to herself and prepared to jump down, but Robin held up a hand to signal to her to stop.

"Keep your distance!" he shouted, "Ivy has a pheromone that'll incapacitate anyone who inhales it!"

"Speaking of which," said Harley, "Why isn't he writhing and begging for your touch?"

"That's a good question," said Ivy, "Normally I'd suspect he was asexual, but Girl Wonder over here just implied they've had sex."

"Maybe you're losing your mojo," said Harley.

"Or," grinned Ivy, "Maybe Robin here has some problems of his own."

"What do you mean?" asked Harley.

"My pheromones can't work if the victim is already having trouble getting excited."

Harley broke out into a long cackle. Robin turned slightly red as he clenched his teeth.

"Bird brain's having performance issues!" she laughed, "That's rich!"

"Hey!" shouted Batgirl indignantly, "Shut up!"

"So it's true," sneered Ivy.

"Batgirl!" whined Robin, now bright red.

"I'm tired of this," said Ivy, "Harley, take care of him."

"With pleasure."

Harley pulled a baseball bat from behind her back and ran at Robin. Robin dodged backwards as she swung at him, flipped into a handstand, and kicked the bat out of her hand with both legs. Batgirl descended into the alley as this happened, cutting off Ivy before she could leave.

"Your funeral, Girl Wonder," said Ivy.

"It's Batgirl!" declared Batgirl, punching at Ivy as the green woman stepped back to dodge it.

"Hey!" called out Robin, breaking away from Harley, "I said to keep your distan- EEP!"

Robin turning away from Harley had granted her the opportunity to reach into the back of his tights, grab the waistband of his white briefs, and hoist them up to his shoulders. Batgirl cringed at the thought of how painful it was as Harley successfully stretched the waistband up and over Robin's head like a hoodie.

"Atomic wedgie!" announced Harley proudly.

"Ooh," said Ivy to Batgirl, feigning sympathy, "Sorry, girl. That's certainly not going to help matters for you two, huh?"

Batgirl growled and swung at Ivy again. Ivy dodged, held her hand up between their faces, and blew against her palm. Batgirl coughed as a strong smell overwhelmed her nose and throat.

There was a moment of daze as Batgirl didn't know quite what to make of her senses. The first sensation that came back to her wasn't sight or sound, but arousal. Batgirl realized she was incredibly turned on all of the sudden. She could feel herself getting wet as her heartbeat raced and she started to sweat. The desire was almost painful. Suddenly all she cared about was relieving the unbearable sexual desire overtaking her.

"Let's go," said Ivy, gently brushing her hand against Batgirl's chin.

The gentle touch was enough to send Batgirl reeling to the ground. She felt herself almost convulse with pleasure. Ivy's touch had come so close to bringing her to sexual satisfaction. All Batgirl wanted was more of that touch, but Ivy had already grabbed the valuables and run off. Batgirl collapsed against the wall and slid down onto her butt.

Harley Quinn cartwheeled away after her girlfriend, leaving Batgirl in her state of sexual starvation and Robin with his underwear still pulled tightly over his head. He struggled to get the waistband off, eventually succeeding as it snapped back to his butt. Seeing Harley and Ivy were nowhere to be seen, Robin sighed in defeat and shoved both hands down his pants to fix the wedgie.

"What happened here?" demanded Batman.

Robin spun around, face bright red as he stood in complete attention. Batman was standing directly behind him. Robin had no idea how long he'd been there. After staring at Robin for a moment, he turned his attention to Batgirl, moaning on the ground.

"Ivy hit her with her pheromones," explained Robin.

"She hit you too," said Batman, "I can smell it. Why aren't you affected?"

"I, um… uh…"

"You've been having sexual difficulties lately," concluded Batman, "I see."

Robin bit his lip so hard he thought it'd bleed. Batman walked over to Batgirl and lifted her up off the ground, carrying her in his arms. She let out a long moan and trembled. Batman shifted her weight and fired his grappling gun, soaring off. Robin fumbled with his own grappling gun for a moment before following after him.

"I'm telling you!" insisted Harley, "Erectile dysfunction can have psychological causes too!"

"Please stop," sighed Ivy.

"I'm a psychiatrist, remember?"

"It's not that I doubt your authority on the matter," said Ivy, "so much as it is that I don't want to think about Robin's penis."

Harley and Ivy were in a small abandoned theater in Gotham Heights. When the theater company moved, the landlord was unable to find a new renter. Harley and Ivy had 'convinced' him to rent it to them at the reasonable rate of $0 forever. Plants had of course grown en masse and overtaken much of the building's original structure. Harley and Ivy had been hiding out there together for some time.

"Think about it," said Harley, jumping in front of Ivy, "Working under the bat 24/7? That's got to cause one heck of an inferiority complex!"

"You think Robin's having performance issues because he's insecure?"

"Mm-hm."

"I'm missing the part where this has anything to do with us."

"If Robin's having self esteem issues," explained Harley, "that's something we can use against him, don't you think?"

Ivy broke into a smile and pulled Harley's face in for a kiss. She listened to the satisfying sound of Harley moaning before pulling away.

"That's beautifully devious," said Ivy, "I love you!"

"I'm just saying," said Batgirl, "That was uncalled for on his part."

"Do we have to talk about this now? asked Robin through gritted teeth.

Robin was atop one of the taller buildings in Gotham Heights, looking around with his binoculars and listening in on police reports in his ear piece. Batgirl was squatting beside him, doing the same.

"Oh come on," said Batgirl, "The stakes aren't that high. Harley and Ivy aren't going to kill anyone."

"Still," said Robin, "Can't we hold off on this talk until after we've caught them?"

"Harley's gotten away from you four times in the past month, Dick."

"It's 'Robin' in the field," grumbled Robin irritably, "and how'd you know that?"

"Bru- Batman had me go through every case file for the last year or so."

"Great," sighed Robin, knowing the embarrassing details of his failures were in those files as well.

"I think you need to have a conversation with him about boundaries," said Batgirl, "Intentionally humiliating you in front of me should be out of the question."

"Grr…"

"Okay, sorry," said Batgirl, "We can talk about it another time."

"Not that," said Robin angrily, handing Batgirl the binoculars and pointing.

Batgirl followed his finger and looked at the target through the binoculars. She saw posters covering the side of a small building. The posters read "Robin can't get it up" and featured a crude drawing of Robin with a drooping penis between his legs.

Before Batgirl could fully understand what she was looking at, Robin was off. He used the grappling gun to repel down the side of the building and jump onto another. From there he made his way down the smaller buildings until he got to the wall, where he began to furiously tear down the posters.

"Robin, wait!" called out Batgirl, "It could be a-"

The next immediate poster Robin tore off revealed a foreign-looking yellow flower underneath. It released a puff of yellow dust that engulfed Robin's face. The Boy Wonder then fell to the ground, limp and unconscious.

"-trap," whispered Batgirl, "Oh, why'd I have to say it?"

Knowing Robin was in danger, Batgirl immediately followed his lead down the side of her building and across the rooftops of the others until she reached Robin's side. That's when Batgirl saw something out of the corner of her eye and leapt away.

A single, loud bell chime erupted from the impact of the hammer against the concrete where Batgirl had just been. Wielding the hammer was Harley Quinn, who gracefully spun the weapon about before resting it on her shoulder. The handle of the hammer was long and the head was at least two feet long and about a foot and a half in diameter, creating an enormous cylinder at the end of the long handle.

"Well, well, well," she grinned, "If it ain't Batchick!"

"Batgirl," she responded, drawing a batarang from her belt.

"Whatever," said Harley, rolling her eyes.

A net of vines descended from the building with the posters, gently lowering Poison Ivy to the ground. Ivy proceeded to kneel down and pick Robin's body up off the ground. Batgirl turned to whip the batarang at her, but Harley swung down and struck Batgirl on top of the head, letting out an ear-splitting chime as it pounded her into the ground. The deafening ring continued as Batgirl slowly got to her knees.

How am I alive? she wondered, After a blow from a hammer that big I should be dead. Or at least unconscious. And that noise…

"That hammer," mumbled Batgirl, "It's hollow with a clapper on the inside. It's basically a very painful slapstick."

"Aw, way to spoil the magic!" frowned Harley, "But you're right. It's meant to be fun, not deadly. Frankly, you should be grateful."

Ivy was walking away with Robin now. Batgirl got to her feet to give chase, but she only got about a step before she felt her shoulders get jerked back as Harley yanked on her cape. Batgirl stumbled back, still dizzy from the earlier blow, and Harley pulled the cape down over Batgirl's face. Then Batgirl felt Harley take something off her belt and reclip it in the back.

"You're going for a ride, Batdork!" declared Harley.

Batgirl heard the sound of the grappling gun firing and catching something up above her. Then she heard the click of the trigger being pulled. The next thing she knew, the back of her belt was launching upward, taking her pants with them. Batgirl winced in discomfort and screamed as the force of the wedgie lifted her clear off the ground and into the sky before clicking again a moment later and leaving her dangling.

Batgirl threw her cape off of her face, seeing now that Harley had used the grappling gun's repelling feature to reel Batgirl up to the top of a street lamp. Batgirl fumbled around behind her back, trying to get her pants unhooked without letting go of the gun so she wouldn't fall. By the time she had disconnected herself and swung safely to the ground, Harley and Ivy were nowhere to be seen.

Batgirl clenched her fist in indignant anger. She hated that they had gotten the best of them again. Especially when Robin was already feeling insecure. Batgirl couldn't tell Batman about this, not if she wanted to preserve any shred of Robin's dignity. Luckily, she had a good feeling as to where they might be.

Robin blinked awake. A moment passed before her remembered what had happened. Then he realized that his hands were tied behind his back. He quickly rolled to his feet and went to move, but felt a choking jerk that held him in place. He was wearing a collar.

"Wakey wakey!" called Harley.

Laughter filled the air. Lights burst on, blinding Robin. He heard chuckling and general murmuring in front of him. He was on some sort of stage. Slowly his vision adjusted and he saw about a dozen armed thugs staring at him.

"Harley- Gak!"

Robin choked himself with the collar again as he went to move. He was still adjusting to where he was leashed. It was something above him. He didn't like that. It was probably integrated in the stage's rigging.

"What do you say, boys?" beckoned Harley, "Ready for a show?"

The thugs all let out cheers. Robin gritted his teeth as he caught the outlines of Harley and Ivy on a second floor balcony. They were both looking down at him.

"Now presenting," said Harley, speaking in an early 20th century radio voice, "The never before seen battle between four hyenas and a Robin!"

Robin tensed as he heard growling. Sure enough, two hyenas crawled onstage from either side, all slowly approaching him. Robin fumbled with his restraints, but it was no use. He wasn't getting free. He slowly backed away from the beasts while trying to be mindful of his leash.

"Oh yeah," added Harley in her usual Brooklyn accent, "and the Robin's wings have been clipped to make things interesting."

Robin froze as his collar tightened. He couldn't back away any further. The hyenas were closing in. His wrists bound and at the end of his leash, there was nothing else Robin could do. He simply took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and accepted it.

Then he felt one of the hyenas sniffing at his knee. Then she licked it a few times before lying down. Robin opened his eyes and saw all of the hyenas sitting or lying in front of him. He recognized these hyenas. He had helped Harley free them from Thorne several weeks ago.

The crowd broke out into a cacophony of boos.

"Aw!" fawned Harley, "See? I told you they'd remember him!"

"Now what?" demanded Ivy, "You don't hire a dozen thugs for a show and then fail to deliver!"

"What can I say?" shrugged Harley, "My henchman subscription renewed automatically. I figured since we were going to be charged anyway…"

"Stop right there!" ordered a voice from above.

A figure dove out from the rafters and fired a grappling gun over to the second floor balcony, reeling herself over the crowd of thugs and straight to Harley and Ivy.

"Batgirl!" smiled Robin.

"Bat Broad!" barked Harley.

"Someone's feeling cocky," said Ivy, willing the vines in the walls to slowly grow out toward them.

"The police already know about this location," said Batgirl, "They're on their way now. I suggest you get up and go before they get here."

"She's bluffing," said Harley.

"Agreed," said Ivy, "Let's take care of her."

Batgirl jumped at the two. Ivy's vines swiftly scooped her off the ground and into the air. Batgirl redirected herself toward Harley and hit her right in the cheek with the full force of her punch. Batgirl winced in pain. These gloves softened the blow of punches, but it still wasn't something she was used to.

Harley growled as she scrambled to her feet, grabbing her mallet from off her back and swinging it at Batgirl. She was ready this time. Batgirl reached out and caught the handle of the hammer, knowing there wasn't really much weight to the weapon.

"Maybe I shouldn't have let you know how this works," sighed Harley.

Batgirl used the hammer as leverage to deliver a sidekick to Harley's gut. Harley coughed as she released the hammer and stumbled backwards. Batgirl kept her momentum going, spun all the way around, and slammed the head of the hammer into the side of Harley's head. It made a satisfying ding! sound as she toppled to the ground several feet away.

Batgirl yelped as she felt something graze her shoulder. The next thing she knew, vines were tightening around her wrists and ankles. The vines lifted her up and pulled her limbs outward, forcing her to stare directly at Ivy.

"Nice try, dear," said Ivy, "but I'm afraid you're through."

Meanwhile down on the stage, the thugs had grown restless and started to get up and onto the stage to kill or injure Robin. None of them got farther than one foot onto the stage however, as the hyenas quickly turned to them all and let out warning growls.

Suddenly several police sirens sounded and red and blue light flooded in through the windows. The thugs all ran about in a panic as the hyenas leapt away yelping. Harley slowly returned to her feet and took in what was going on.

"She really did call in the cops!" cursed Ivy, "Fall back!"

The vines threw Batgirl aside before creating a cradle for Ivy and Harley, which they rode up and out of the theater.

Robin swallowed nervously. He wasn't looking forward to being found by the police like this. Then Batgirl used her grappling gun to swing down onto the stage. She pulled a small knife from out of her utility belt and used it to cut away his collar and restraints.

"We should probably get goi-" began Robin.

"You think I'd really bring the police here?" snorted Batgirl, "I'm the commissioner's daughter. One of them could easily recognize me."

"Then what-?"

Batgirl clicked a button on her smart device. The sirens and lights slowly faded away. Batgirl explained that she had gotten an old police siren, some speakers, and rigged up an overall illusion of police presence.

"Damn you're good," whispered Robin.

"You're not…" asked Batgirl hesitantly, "...uncomfortable with me saving you? Won't that make things difficult with-?"

"Are you kidding!?" smiled Robin, "That was the damm sexiest rescue I've ever seen!"

"Yeah," smirked Batgirl, "It was."

Batgirl walked over and Robin leaned down into a kiss. She gently wrapped her hands around his waist and kissed harder. Robin felt himself get hard. It really was the sexiest thing he'd ever seen. The next thing Robin knew, Batgirl was pushing toward the wall, unfastening her utility belt. Robin excitedly followed suit.

"Robin," ordered Batman, "Assume a defensive stance."

Robin did so. He and Batman were standing opposite each other in the sparring area of the batcave. Batgirl watched from the side, taking in Batman's instructions and advice.

"A lesson in facing defensive opponents," explained Batman, "Your first move doesn't have to be the one that breaks through. It can be the move that sets it up. Like so."

Batman delivered a sidekick to Robin's arms, which he held up defense. The blow caused Robin to stumble back and for his arms to be pushed away, leaving him wide open. Batman went to deliver a cross punch directly to Robin's chest. To Batman's surprise, Robin agilely dodged the punch and gripped Batman's arm in an aikido hold, twisting the arm and putting all of his strength into the following swing that flipped Batman forward and onto his back.

"...unless your opponent can move quickly enough to recognise and counter the break through," concluded Batman, getting to his feet.

Robin grinned widely and rested both hands on his hips.

"Smugness doesn't suit you," said Batman, "Tell me, where did this sudden burst of strength and confidence come from?"

Robin shrugged.

"Mm-hm," nodded Batman doubtfully.

Batgirl knew. The night before when Batgirl had saved Robin, the subsequent sex they had was the best either of them ever had. Not only was Robin glowing from the experience, but he had the renewed confidence for how much he had pleased Batgirl that night.

Probably for the best that Batman doesn't know, thought Batgirl.

Batman glanced over at Batgirl.

There's no way he knows… Right?