Chapter 121
Visiting hours were finished and even Sara and Alex were being forced to take a break and go home. Sara looked forward to a shower and a good meal before hopefully picking up Kate later that evening. "Just give me a minute to say goodbye guys" said Sara. Everyone else said goodbye to Kate and left. Sara took Kate's hand in both of hers. "Will you be okay without me for a few hours?" she smiled. "I'll miss you but I'll be fine. Go... take a break" said Kate and squeezed Sara's hand. "You feeling okay sweetie?" asked Sara cocking her head looking at the dark bruises under Kate's eyes. "Yeah... I'm fine, it's a bit more comfortable now that they've taken the nose plugs out but it still hurts" sighed Kate. "I'm sorry baby... Nurse said they'll come give you something more for the pain soon" said Sara softly and touched Kate's good cheek. Kate smiled and whispered "I love you".
Minutes after Sara left Kate got up to go to the bathroom. She sat on the edge of the bed for a few seconds. The right side of her chest had a dull ache and Kate took a slow breath to try and ease the pain. She got up and started walking. A wave of dizziness hit her, the next minute everything went fuzzy and she saw double of the bathroom door in front of her. She closed her eyes and clung to her IV stand. She walked to the bathroom stumbling around completely off balance. After sitting on the toilet for five minutes trying to find the courage to walk back to bed she got up and left the bathroom. She felt off balance again and the fuzzy image returned. She leaned against the doorframe. "Kate?... are you okay?" she heard a voice say. She looked up and saw two of Nancy standing in front of her and started walking. "Let me help you... you're stumbling around like you're drunk!" said Nancy helping Kate back into bed. "Why didn't you press the call button" said Nancy. "Because I'm fine" said Kate annoyed. "You don't look fine" said Nancy looking into Kate's eyes with a penlight. "Nance... no... I'm okay" said Kate pushing her hand away. A nurse walked in to check on Kate. "Can you please page Dr Shepherd... Dr Morgan is experiencing some dizziness" she said. "Uhhh no" Kate tried to object. "Just relax... you want to tell me what's going on?" asked Nancy. "I was a little dizzy ... for a minute... it's nothing" said Kate. "Anything else" said Nancy checking Kate's BP. Kate stayed quiet for a minute. "Um... double vision, headache but you know as well as I do it's just the concussion. It will be gone in a day or two" said Kate. "Maybe... I still want Derek to check you out though" said Nancy. "I'm not your patient... You don't have to worry about me thanks. Vision's back to normal" said Kate stubbornly. The nurse popped her head around the corner. "Shepherd will be here in fifteen minutes. He's just finishing up in the OR" she said. "Okay thanks" said Nancy. "I'm going to keep you awake till then" she smiled. They chatted about trivial things for a few minutes. "I know why this happened" said Kate. "Oh yeah?" questioned Nancy. "So I will never... ever underestimate a patient's pain again from a rib fracture" said Kate through her teeth trying to get more comfortable. "Ha... you're funny... So... how's it going with you and Sara?" asked Nancy. "Uhmm... it's going really great thanks" said Kate caught off guard for a second. "Kate... dating Sara Quin is... well it's quite a big deal and I'm sure it's not easy" said Nancy. Kate shrugged "Nothing worthwhile is ever easy... anyway, she's worth it" she smiled. "Katy... I just don't want you to get hurt" said Nancy sincerely. "I won't" said Kate looking right into Nancy's eyes. "You already have" said Nancy. Kate shook her head. "Nance... Sara... makes me really happy" said Kate. "Uh huh" grunted Nancy. "I just don't know how... compatible your lifestyles are. And I don't want you in danger again because of Sara. Dating Sara is dangerous" said Nancy. Kate clenched her jaw and looked angry. "Dating Sara isn't dangerous. This was one event... one mentally unstable person... you don't have to be famous to have a nutcase obsessed with you" said Kate sounding upset. "Yeah but the odds sure are higher... and what about this guy that abducted them. Kate, I don't want you in the firing line like that" said Nancy. "Nancy... I know you're just worried about me and you're saying this because you care... but I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself" said Kate. "I know... I... I just worry about you. If she hurts you Kate..." said Nancy becoming emotional. "Hey... Nancy... I really appreciate your friendship and I now you mean well but I really can take care of myself. Nance... Before Sara... I don't know... I was just on autopilot. Every day just going through the motions, running on adrenaline fumes. But Sara... Sara changed something in me. Sara brought me back to life. She's as much of a healer as I am" smiled Kate. The image of Nancy standing with her arms folded suddenly blurred again. Kate closed her eyes tight and let out a small whimper. "Kate? Kate are you okay?" said Nancy panicked again. Owen walked into the room "What's going on Nance?" he said. "I don't know, she's been dizzy, blurred vision, headache... I've paged Derek to come have a look" said Nancy. "Okay let's just check your vitals" said Owen and gently started examining Kate.
Derek sent Kate for another round of CT scans and did some more tests. "Well... the dizziness is just the concussion I'm sure. The new CT shows nothing to worry about at all" said Derek. "Great... can I go home now?" asked Kate. "Yeah... Neurologically you can but it's up to Dr Hunt. Kate... you know what to look out for. Don't play the hero please, phone if anything doesn't feel right" said Derek. "Yeah, it's more the double vision and lack of balance throwing me off than anything. "I want the ophthalmologist to check your eyes Kate... I don't have a good feeling about this" said Owen. "Jeez Dr Hunt, nice way to make me feel at ease" said Kate sounding annoyed. "Sorry Kate. She's brilliant though, she'll have you out of here in no time" said Owen. The eye specialist Dr Jones, a beautiful brunette with a pretty smile entered the room. She was new at the hospital. "Dr Morgan? Hi, I don't think we've met, I'm Anna" said Dr Jones. "I'm Kate, nice to meet you Anna" said Kate. "So Dr Morgan, I believe you've been experiencing a bit of double vision, some blurring?" said Anna. "It's Kate.. My dad's Dr Morgan" said Kate. "Okay Kate!" smiled Anna. "Yeah... a little, I'm sure it's nothing" said Kate. "Alright, let's just have a quick look. Can somebody get the lights please" said Anna. Owen dimmed the lights in the room. Anna gently pried open Kate's swollen eye with her gloved fingers. "I apologise if I'm hurting you... Just look straight ahead" she said as she examined Kate's retinas. "Mmm, is it more the one eye than the other?" said Anna. "Uh... I don't know... There's some pain in the swollen one and yeah I guess that's the one causing the trouble" said Kate. "Follow my finger... touch your nose" said Anna and Kate obliged. "I'm going to have to take you for a whole lot of eye tests. I'm sorry! Let's just make sure everything's okay" she said. "There goes my nap" said Kate with a sigh.
Sara was back at the hospital a few hours later. She walked into Kate's room. The bed was gone. She looked around confused. Sara walked to the nurses' station. "Where's Kate?" she asked confused. "Hi Sara, they just took her for a few tests. She'll be back pretty soon" smiled the nurse. "What kind of tests?" said Sara sounding upset. "Sara, the doctor will be here to talk to you in a few minutes" said the nurse. "No... is she okay? What's going on?" said Sara now almost frantic. She felt hands on her shoulders and spun around fast. "Nancy... where's Kate" said Sara. "She's okay, they took her for some eye tests. Relax" said Nancy. Sara let out a huge sigh of relief. "Oh... thanks" she said. "Come, I'll get you a cup of coffee" said Nancy.
Nancy and Sara sat down in Kate's empty room sipping their coffee. Nancy explained the situation to Sara briefly. "Do you think there's a problem with her eyes Nancy?" asked Sara. "I don't know... I hope not... for your sake" said Nancy. "What?" said Sara frowning. "Sara... I guess it's not my place to say this but" said Nancy. "But what... say it" said Sara. "I don't want Kate to get hurt and right now... I don't know..." Nancy trailed off shaking her head. "I don't want her getting hurt either Nancy... I'd do anything to protect her" said Sara. Nancy just stared at her. "I don't want her to get hurt... and right now... well she... she got hurt and I blame myself for that... I... I... Maybe its better if I'm not in her life anymore" said Sara, tears running down her cheeks. Nancy pulled Sara into a hug. "Sara... Kate's not going anywhere. She's so in love. You're the best thing that's ever happened to her... despite this... I just want you to take good care of her... and if that means extra security then get the fucking extra security. And emotionally... don't you hurt her Sara... You mean the world to her I can see that. But... she's got a really small heart. She bruises real easy and... listen just take good care of her okay" said Nancy. "I will... I promise I won't hurt her" said Sara softly while nodding.
A minute later Kate got pushed back into the room. "Hey baby" said Sara. Kate blinked hard. "Sar.." she smiled. "How are you doing?" asked Sara. "Okay... I.. Um... just a bit tired they kept me awake most of the day" said Kate. Anna came back into the room and introduced herself to Sara. "What's the verdict" asked Kate. "Well... it's hard to say... I'm not picking up a specific problem but there's some swelling behind the eye and that's probably what's causing the double vision and blurring" said Anna. "That's good news right" said Sara. "Yeah... However... I cannot rule out any nerve damage just yet... we'll have to wait for the swelling to go down in order to assess if there's permanent damage" said Anna. Kate went white as a sheet and breathed heavily. "I'm going to send you home but you need to rest that eye. Take it easy so you keep your BP low we don't want additional pressure behind the eye. Then you need to come back in a few days so we can repeat the tests" said Anna. Kate put her hands over her mouth. "Fuck... this is not good... not good" she said staring out in front of her. "Kate, I don't want you to worry about this yet... give it time it may very well correct itself in time" said Anna. "Yeah and it may not... I... I can't deal with this" said Kate shaking her head tears threatening to spill over. "Let's not jump the gun yet Kate" said Owen. "I'm discharging you with some meds... Get some rest... make sure you do those breathing exercises we don't want a pulmonary infection" he said. Kate just nodded trying to compose herself.
The doctors left Sara alone with Kate after some further instructions. "Baby... everything's going to be fine" said Sara. "Fuck Sar... this is my career we're talking about... I... I can't be a surgeon with a fucked up eye... my future's is at stake" said Kate sounding annoyed. "Kate I don't know what to say to make you feel better... but I'm here for you" said Sara softly. "Yeah... Thank you... I'm so glad you're with me Sar... fuck, fuck, fuck!" said Kate. Sara gently helped Kate get dressed careful not to hurt her sore ribs. "Sar... don't tell anybody yet please" said Kate. "Okay sweetie... but I think that they would want to know so they can be there for you" said Sara. "They are there for me... and I'd much prefer them to be happy than feeling sorry for me and worrying about me" said Kate. "Let us take care of you for a change Kate. Just relax... we've got you okay" smiled Sara. "Don't tell them" said Kate. "Whatever you want angel" said Sara concerned.
Tegan, Erin and Alex walked into the room a few minutes later smiling. "There's a new star patient in town! Ready to roll K-dawg?" said Tegan pushing a wheel chair. Kate started walking out the door. "No no... sit your ass down patient" said Tegan playfully. Kate rolled her eyes but was secretly thankful because she was off balance again and her vision blurred. "Rules you know" said Tegan. "Yes Dr Quin. You're just loving this aren't you" smiled Kate.
It was dark by the time they got home and Kate went straight to the bedroom hanging onto Sara for support, trying to keep the picture in focus. She hated feeling this dependent on somebody. "Tegan... I need to hook up your IV again and... Um... I just need to check your vitals" said Kate sounding tired and sore. "You can just tell us which one, this central line is nifty you just plug the thing in" said Tegan. "Tee... no please... I want to check" said Kate. Tegan frowned. She felt fine, a little tired after being out and about more than usual that day but the pain from her surgery was almost gone and she was breathing very comfortably. "Tegan please" said Kate becoming slightly emotional. "Okay... Kate just take it easy you can do what you need to do... I'm right here" said Tegan softly putting her hand on Kate's shoulder. "Thank you... Sara can you please get my bag" said Kate. "Sit down on the bed Tee" said Kate. Kate forced herself up and gritted her teeth. Her pain meds had long worn off and her ribs and head were throbbing again. "Are you okay Katy?" asked Tegan. "I'm fine" said Kate steadying herself against the wall. Tegan stayed quiet, careful not to upset Kate who seemed completely disheveled. Kate took longer than usual to check Tegan's BP, temp, heart and lungs since she was seeing two of Tegan from time to time. She tried to read the blurry numbers on the BP monitor and squinted to make the blurry image clear. "115 over 78" said Sara when she saw Kate struggling. Tegan gave Sara a quizzical look. She was suddenly worried about Kate. Sara read the number on the digital thermometer. "Okay... your heart rate is a bit high but everything else is fine. Go to bed now Tee... you've had a busy day" said Kate. "Yeah because you're scaring me... but okay I'm going straight to bed... you get some rest too Kate. You're looking a bit pale" said Tegan. "I'm just fine... call me if you need me" said Kate. Tegan smiled and nodded. "Promise me you'll call me if..." said Kate before being interrupted by Tegan. "I'm feeling great Kate... but okay I promise. Relax" she said.
Sara was a good nurse and had Kate in her pajamas in bed in no time. Erin brought her something light to eat before Sara gave her the pain medication Owen sent her home with. "Time to get some rest now hero... just relax those pain meds will kick in any minute now" said Sara. "Thank you for taking care of me my love" said Kate groggily as the pain meds started numbing her and relaxing her tight muscles. Sara pulled up the covers to below her chin. "Shhh... sleep now and try and forget about everything" said Sara. Kate was out a few seconds later.
Sara took ages to fall asleep. She was worried sick about Kate and she blamed herself for her career being in jeopardy. The scene of Carmen punching Kate in the face over and over again kept repeating in her mind. She kept thinking about what she could have done differently to prevent the situation. She finally fell into a restless sleep but was woken up in the middle of the night when Kate let out a small whimper and started moving. She was lying on her good side and her arms were moving in and out slightly, Sara saw her bicep muscles twitching. "No... keep going... no... one more time. Keep going... again... again... harder... no this... can't... no... no Tegan... Tegan" she mumbled. "Kate... baby wake up... come on Kate wake up... you're dreaming" said Sara. She didn't want to shake her awake in fear of hurting her ribs. "Defib... no... there's still time...keep going... Tegan please" Kate started wailing. "Kate wake up!" said Sara loudly shaking her shoulder softly. Kate's eyes flew open and she gasped. She flinched put her hand on her ribs, she was sweaty and started shaking. She gave fast, shallow breaths. "Tegan" she mumbled. "Sweetie Tegan is okay... she's safe and sound in bed. Kate just take some deep breaths it was just a bad dream okay... just a dream" said Sara stroking Kate's hair. Kate started sobbing "Just a dream... just a dream" she repeated through her tears. "Shhhh calm down sweetie... just take a sip of water" said Sara holding a straw to Kate's lips. Kate took a sip but was still sobbing. "Ahhhh" she cried as every sob felt like a punch in the ribs. "Kate... Tegan's fine... just a dream... come on now deep breaths" said Sara softly as tears rolled down her face. Seeing Kate like this was sheer torture. After a few minutes Kate seemed a bit calmer. "That was the worst dream I've ever had" whispered Kate with her head on Sara's chest. "Shhh try and forget about it" said Sara softly. "I... I lost her Sara... I couldn't save her... it was so real... we tried so long but she didn't come back to us... we lost her" said Kate and started sobbing again. "Kate... Tegan is fine... you saved her... she's fine and she's sleeping safe and sound at home... just try and relax now okay" said Sara desperate to calm Kate down. It took an hour and another pain pill before Kate was finally asleep again.
A couple of hours later Sara woke up and saw Kate sitting on the side of the bed. Dawn was breaking outside. Kate unbuttoned her pajama shirt, slowly pulled it off and got up. "Baby... what's going on, it's early come back to bed" said Sara. "No... I need to go check on Tegan" said Kate sitting back down as the dizziness hit her again. "Tegan is fine... she's sleeping. Lie back down Kate" said Sara putting her hand on Kate's naked back. "I need to check" said Kate. "Baby... no, lie down" said Sara. Kate put her head in her hands and started sobbing again, shaking her head. "Kate what's wrong" asked Sara sitting down next to her. Kate shook her head. "Nothing" she mumbled. "Did you have another bad dream?" asked Sara softly. Kate stayed quiet for a few seconds and looked away. "Baby?" whispered Sara. "Uh huh... same one" said Kate, her voice changing pitch. "Oh sweetie... come on lie back down... shhhhh now... Tegan's okay" she whispered and gently guided Kate back down to the pillows. Kate was shaking in her arms. "I don't know what's going on with me Sar... I don't understand... what's going on with me" cried Kate. "It's okay sweetie... shhhh... everything's alright... we're going to get you some help... we're going to get you some help and everything will be good. Just take deep breaths" said Sara softly while running her fingers gently up and down Kate's back. Just as Kate was about to nod off again she shook herself awake. "Relax Katy" said Sara. "I don't want to sleep again... don't make me sleep again" said Kate sounding emotional. "You need some rest babe" whispered Sara. "No... I don't want to dream that again... it's going to come back again" said Kate.
A/N: Oh dear... the attack seemed to have triggered Kate's PTSD again. She's not having a good time. Good thing she's got Sara to take care of her. Review please.