My plan of avoiding Eric was working, until Four screwed it up.
You see, I was having a really decent Thursday night's sleep, curled up in my warm man-made cocoon in darkness. Training has been going well. Riley doesn't ask me for help anymore – not that she ever did – but now, she's been paying more attention to Four's teaching. I reconciled with my acquaintances over lunch and I'm tolerating them a little bit more. Zack apologized, though I bet he has no idea why he should. I don't answer the question he had asked, and the rest don't bring it up. The real reason for my reconciliation was not because I felt lonely, rather it's because I need a distraction. It's kind ofmean, but what's new? Ignoring Eric is not a very difficult task, all I needed to do was to think about how cute and smart my dogs are instead. I don't meet his gaze; I don't perk up when he walks in. Easy.An added bonus is that he's been absent more than not, so it's not like I have to be on guard each time. He seems angrier each time he comes to the training room though. Stage two of grief – anger – is really taking its course, so there's that.
So, back to my lovely sleep. It was wonderful, until it was cut short. Four enters the dorm with his crowbar in one hand and torchlight in the other. He then proceeds to bang the piece of metal on the wall with an unnecessaryamount of force, yelling for us to get our asses up. Was this how the transfers felt on the first day? Cause it really sucks. As if the banging wasn't enough, the infuriating instructor proceeds to shine the torchlight in each one of our faces, burning our eyes. The light stayed longer on me and judging by how the torch bounces up and down, it suggests that he's laughing at my cocoon. Or my hair. Screw you. That's my best attempt of mentally yelling at him through my fuzzy brain. He informs us that we will be going on a field trip and to be at the train within ten minutes. It's one freaking am.
Five minutes later, I'm at the train platform. I don't need much to get ready, just wriggle out of my hoodie and blankets, tie my hair, pull on the shoes, drink some water, and I'm good to go. As usual, I'm the first transfer there. The Dauntless-born are there too, all excited and talking loudly amongst each other. Four and Eric stands to the side, piles of black bags below their feet. I stand at the middle, in my skin-tight v-neck shirt and capris. It's too flipping cold; screw me.
The train arrives right before my legs freeze over. We pile into the train, some of us carrying the bags the instructors brought. I move to stand near Four, since he's considerably large and emits heat – heat being the keyword.
I don't recognize this activity, maybe they didn't have it twenty years ago.
"War games." Four reaches to the inside of his jacket. How smart of him to wear it."It's like capture-the-flag." At that, he pulls out a neon orange flag; it burns my eyes.
"It is capture-the-flag." Eric snaps. My brows fly up my head and I purse my lips. Isn't he just lovely? Eric pulls out a gun, which sure doesn't look like one. It's an odd shape; constipated. "Shoots neuro-sim darts. One shot of these will feel like an actual gunshot, only difference is that you don't bleed to death." Huh. I manage to locate Riley's face among the sardines – its pale. I do my best not to snicker. Four explains the rules in little detail, because there aren't any rules really. The guns get passed around and soon it's time to split the teams.
This is where he screws me over.
"You go first." Eric says. Thank the heavens.
Four glances down at me, then places his fingers on his mouth, deep in thought. "Cole." I blink. Did he just-
"Tree-hugger." Eric doesn't hesitate, like picking the Amity is second-nature. My eyes widen in complete betrayal. How could he? I tense my entire being and walk stiffly to Eric. Four coughs into his fist, no doubt to cover his laugh. To think that we were friends.
I don't hear the rest of the team splitting, only the blood hammering in my ears. Mild irritation at the somewhat betrayal of my only friend only builds as the minutes tick by.A string of incoherent curses spews out of my tongue. Who appointed him as cupid? My team hops off first; I don't miss the chance to send Four a well-deserved glare.
Jace and Zack are with me, as well as pig-head Mark and red riding-hood Ruby. The night air is frigid. Why did I not think of bringing my hoodie?
Oh right, because I didn't want to risk dirtying it and going without it for a night. I make a mental note to buy another when I get back. IfI get back.
The journey to the trees results in me tripping over twice; at least I'm not the only one. I try sticking close to Jace as a heat source, my teeth clattering and arms coated in a layer of gooseflesh. Tonight, Jace doesn't talk; at least the gods are answering some of my prayers. Regardless, he still isn't warm enough.
"Ideas?" Eric snaps irritably after a few heartbeats of silence. It doesn't take another moment before the initiates burst into conversation, everyone throwing out ideas while berating the previous ones. Jace moves away from me to join the circle that formed. Survival instincts kicking in, I sidle up to Eric, arms folded tightly over myself and gun slung across my back. He won't try anything. We stand a good distance away from the arguing teens. Their voices are already beginning to tire me. Eric's pretty warm, much warmer than Four and Jace combined – not that I was keeping track.
At one point, Mark suggests an idea to place the flag somewhere on the trees. It's a stupid idea; Jace seems to agree. "They would see it from a mile away you idiot!" True.
"The leaves will block it!" Mark protests.
"Yeah well, I don't know if you haven't noticed, but it glows fucking green!" A Dauntless-born girl snarks. I can't help but snicker.
"Time's running out initiates." The man beside me says warningly, getting tired of their futile antics.
An idea comes to me; it spews out of my mouth before I can think it through. "Why don't we hide it under the dock?" Black blobs turn to me – well I think they did – and I gesture at the rotting wooden platform.
Mark pipes up. "But-"
"That's the best idea I've heard so far." Eric cuts off. I doubt he had even listened to the other ideas; I know I hadn't.
"It's on the ground, making it hard to be seen from above, as the buildings will block out the glow. The planks will absorb most of the light too." A cold wind blows.Heck."Plus" Clatter. "We can" Clatter. "Ambush those coming by hiding from in the trees and buildings." I swallow. "And." More clatter. "There's only one way for them to-" Eric wraps an arm around my back and pulls me to him when my teeth clatter again. For once, I'm glad that the night practically blinds everyone, for it hides his arm and the redness in my cheeks. "come get it. Since it's surrounded by the sea." I finish stiffly.
Everyone agrees with my plan, splitting hastily between offense and defense. I'm stuck with Eric on offense. I suspect his glaring was the one that made it such. Since when can one see a glare? No one notices his arm around me, or that I'm basically glued to his side, everyone's just too excited to head out and shoot each other. Not good.
I'm slightly warmer and a good distance away now, since we are lightly jogging – and tripping – around the Pier looking for the other team's flag. Jace and Ruby are the two that follows our group, all of us silent with fingers over the triggers. It is obvious that the Pier was once a magnificent place, glass and buildings with white-washed walls lay either half standing or in rubble, telling of a better time.
The walk between the streets is quiet and boring. If only Hawk was here, I could boost him as he runs up the walls, gaining a high vantage point to look for the other team's flag.
Or I could do it myself. A ladder hides itself in the shadows, just the tip of the wooden edge peaks reflects off the moonlight. "Wait." The group stops and turns to me. I walk over the ladder and heave it out, leaning it against one of the balconies with the top of the building missing the roof. "We need to figure out where the other team keeps their flag, otherwise we'll be here all day." The ladder wobbles beneath me, worn with age. The building I'm on isn't the tallest, but it'll make do.
"Beneath the Ferris Wheel." Eric beats me to it. When did he get up here? "Find the others and tell them, we'll meet you up ahead." I can't see the two initiates, but the likelihood of them currently nodding is high. The implications of his words only register into my brain after their footsteps fade into the night. I suck in a deep breath, and take a step towards the ladder.
Yeah, not happening.
Eric intercepts me immediately, standing directly in the path of escape. "You've been avoiding me." Straight to the point, I'll give him that.
"No I haven't." I snap back instantly. Goodness, I sound like a child. I clear my throat and repeat my words, calmer this time. "No, I haven't been avoiding you."
"Look at me and say it again." His voice is low like a growl; a hidden threat. The brooding man takes a step forward, I take one back.
I close my eyes briefly. I can do this. Simple task. Just one sentence. My eyes lift up to meet his.
He's breathtaking; sharp jaw, spare lips, microdermals, slate blue eyes; a modern Greek god. My heart skips a beat. How I've miss staring at him. I don't look away, giving in to my desires and lust.
It's only when I take the time to scrutinize do I see how he's changed these few days. His face is pale, and it's not due to the moonlight. There are dark circles under his eyes; they aren't obvious though, only noticeable if you stare at him frequently to know what he looks without them.
Inotice them. They stand out like a sore thumb, and I hate it. My hand twitches to reach for his face, to trail along the darken skin like I care deeply for his feelings, because I do, oddly enough. But I can't. I can't compromise all that I've worked for, all everyone's worked for.
Does it matter though? Seeing him like this reminds me of the day at the fence. And I hate it; I hate it; I hate it.
Eric's eyes bore into mine. There's a swirl of emotions fighting with each other. Confusion. Anger. Frustration. Defeat. Exhaustion. He steps closer to me, almost until our chests meet. I can't find the will to step back. His hands move to gently cup my cheek. The palms are warm and gentle, even though his hands are calloused from labor. This feels nice; right; perfect. My eyes flutter close as I lean into him. I feel him do the same. His breath fans my cheeks, dispelling the cold of the night sky. He smells good – cologne and musk. Something that I would lose myself to; something that would break my resolve.
But like a snap of fingers, he's gone. My eyes fly open as he pulls away abruptly, the warmth going with him. The cold air mocks me. "I'm sorry. I can't." Eric blurts out, rubbing his face in irritation. "I mean I can, but I won't. You're not- I'm sorry."
I am her. The words are on the tip of my tongue. Three little words and all this will fade away. No more despondent Eric, no more frustrated me. But I can't, and I've neverhated myself more. "It's okay. I understand."
"No you don't-"
"I do." I say this firmly. I truly do. Taking a deep breath, I force myself to smile. "Let's just, get the flag and pretend this never happened. Alright?"
Never have I ever seen the young Dauntless this conflicted. He's choosing between the past and present; and he can't decide. "Give me a week." He speaks up suddenly. "Give me a week and I'll figure it out." He has this determined look in his eyes – an expression that finally looks good on him.
A week? A week to learn about me? A week to find the girl in the fields? A week to decide? A week to what? Curiosity claws at my mind, filling me up with hope, along with fear. "Okay." I don't pry; I don't push; I give myself the benefit of doubt.
When we arrive to the Ferris wheel, there are initiates crumpled on the ground everywhere. My arm is yanked to the side and my body stumbles behind a wall. Something whizzes past my ears.
"Are you crazy?!" Eric whisper-yells, eyes wide. "There are people up there! You're gonna get shot!" It suddenly strikes me that the malicious leader mighttake this game a little too seriously. I can't help but grin.
"Okay." I whisper-yell back with just as much enthusiasm. "So, what's the plan?"
"Switch sides." Eric pulls me further from the edge of the wall, taking the place where I was crouched seconds ago. He pokes his head out for a split second before bringing it back in. A bullet flies past where his face was mere milliseconds ago. "Number boy's guarding the flag. He's a crazy one, that motherfucker, don't let him see you. Though, I think he knows we're here by the darts."
"Got it, don't let him see me."
"There's an initiate on a ferris wheel cart. I think it's Joe, he's a lousy shooter, so don't worry about him." Has he been keeping tabs on how well everyone can shoot?
"Who's Joe?"
"One of the transfers you train with…?" He says incredulously.
I have no idea who he is. "Right. Lousy shooter. Don't worry about him."
"But don't let him see you!" Eric's cute.I steel my face to prevent cracking up. His eyebrow lifts, the metal studs glint under the moonlight. "Are you finding this funny?"
"What makes you say that?" To think that I was good at faking emotions.
"You look constipated." I do?
I clear my throat. "Just thought of something weird."
Eric looks at me exasperatedly; at least he doesn't look like he's going to snap me in half. "At a crucial time like this?"
"I'm sorry." I wheeze out.
Eric doesn't find me convincing, but he goes back to evaluating our situation. By the time he's done, he's located every guard on Four's team – all of which I should not let them see me – and conclude that we are the only two people on our offense squad left. It amazes me to no end how he managed to dissect and assess the whole scene with a few pokes of his head.
"Now remember, these initiates probably think that everyone is down, so they won't be expecting us. All except Four, because Four's an ass."
"Four's an ass, got it." Eric smirks at my serious face. He isn't aware that I now have bad-blood with him too.
"Two shots. Remember where they are?" We had moved from our earlier spot, taking camp behind a different building.
"Ten thirty and eleven forty-five. Don't think, just shoot." I recite his orders from earlier.
Eric nods his head. "Good. I'll be right behind you." Wait, what?"Go!" The twenty-year-old man shoves me out into the open, like a lamb thrown into the wolves' den – cause that's exactly what it is.
I don't have time to think or swear before my instincts take over. I fire two shots in succession, yelps and shrieks fill the air. Was that Riley?Adrenaline surges through my veins and my legs push me straight towards the flag and Four. Two more dart-shots registers in my ears, but only one yelp follows. "Split up!" Eric barks from behind me. I take the right while he takes the left. I leap over a panting Mark, he seems pretty worn out. Good. Four waves the gun between the two of us, shooting darts in miscalculated panic. I miraculously dodge all of them, and so does Eric; I think. Four aims his gun at me again, who is only meters away now, but this time it only clicks.
Eric picks up on the sound before I can utter a word. He lifts his gun and shoots the defenseless instructor, making him groan and fall onto the ground. I dive for the flag as if all the other initiates weren't already down. With the fabric in hand, I whoop and jump in victory, pausing to wave it in number boy's face. Eric laughs while number-boy rolls his eyes. I shoot him in the thigh.
The ride back to the Dauntless is full of grumpy teenagers. Only me and Eric are high on euphoria, since we're the only ones who bothdidn't get shot or sit at the docks, bored out of our minds. Well… maybe Jace is high too.
"Did you see them?" Jace exclaims to a bunch of exhausted Dauntless-born. "They came out of nowhere and was like 'phew!' 'phew!' and then-"
"Yeah I know, I was the one they shot." A girl growls irritatingly, rubbing her shoulder.
Jace ignores her. "It was so cool! And when Four ran out of bullets… You should've seen his face!" Jace cackles like he doesn't notice that everyone, except me, can't relate.
I tuck my feet beneath me and rise from the ground, moving lean out of the car next to Four. "You knew we would win." I say quietly, my anger towards him now dissipated. I figured it out when I realized that Four didn't alert the rest of the initiates the moment he spotted us. Four sighs but doesn't turn to me. He was shot four times, though the number wasn't intentional. Eric had his shit-eating grin the whole way to the train, watching his rival hobble on his good leg. At one point, I felt so guilty that I offered to carry his gun or help him. He declined both offers, snapping that he was a 'perfectly capable Dauntless soldier' who can handle a few 'measly' shots. I suppose his pride has been slightly wounded.
It takes a moment for him to speak up, but when he does, I almost didn't catch it. "For what it's worth, I'll do it again."
Thinking back, I can't help but agree.
A/N
By far my favourite chapter. Hope you guys enjoyed it as much as I did when writing and editing it.
Reading it now, I feel motivated to add more Eric into my stories. :'D I shall try.
On a more serious note, I think I'll only be updating once every two days. I'm starting to intern at an equine hospital and won't have time to write as much. I don't think it'll come to a point where I update once a week (maybe until school starts back up next year - if I haven't finished the story by then)