Early on Sunday morning, the dust still hasn't quite settled after the events of Friday night...

Hidan was dreaming that he was in the Admiral Duncan again. This time, though, he was with Deidara - and Dei was telling him all about his amazing new idea. Hidan was frantic - on the verge of panic - trying everything he could think of to persuade him not to do it. Because he knows how this one turns out. But Dei won't listen.

And then, without warning, it's happening. He feels a sharp pain in his neck and he can't see properly for the smoke. His ears feel muffled. Down on the floor there's glass and blood and bits of people everywhere; Dei's in pieces too - and then Kakuzu's beside him, saying, don't worry sweetheart, I can put him back together, but he isn't doing it right - it isn't Deidara anymore anyway, it's Sasori, and there doesn't seem to be enough of him to make a whole person. On his knees now, he scrabbles desperately around in the blood and metal and tarmac trying to find the other half of Sasori's face-

He woke with a horrible strangled gasp, and Deidara's voice ringing in his head saying 'like the negative space of a presence, yeah?' He knew without even having to think at all now that Dei's new idea was about Sasori - about losing Sasori. He wasn't sure how he could have missed the implication the other night. He wasn't sure either if Dei recognised it himself in the state he was in. But what was absolutely certain was that with that force behind it he'd do it somehow - with or without Hidan - and when he did it would probably bring half the studio complex down.

He was sweaty and tangled in the sheets; one pillow was half over his head. He flung them away from him, then rolled over onto his back and lay panting, looking up at the fancy plaster ceiling rose and half-wanting to check the news to see if Dei had blown up his studio in the night. He felt Kakuzu shifting beside him and then his face appeared above him; half concerned, half quizzical. "Hidan?" he said, helping to disentangle him from the rest of the sheet. "What's the matter? Bad dream?"

Hidan nodded but didn't say anything about it. It was still too raw. His heart was still hammering and he groped on the bedside table for his rosary - fruitlessly and with rising panic - before Kakuzu observed pointedly that it was still around his neck. He still fumbled it even when he knew where it was, looking up resentfully at Kakuzu, who sighed and placed it with exaggerated purpose into his palm.

"You'll choke yourself in your sleep, one of these days," he remarked acidly, a little piqued that Hidan was choosing Jashin over him for comfort. "You're like a baby with a pacifier, honestly!" Could he wean Hidan off his dependence on this thing, he wondered? He knew he shouldn't let himself even think about it though - he'd only get irritated. "Lets go for a run," he suggested, yawning until his jaw cracked. "Better than dwelling - you can tell me about it as we go. If you want."

Out in the street, although there was still an early-morning chill in the air, Kisame was out in his boxer shorts, shaking a box of cat biscuits and calling for Samehada. When he saw them he crossed the street.

"That wretched cat of mine's been out all night - you haven't seen her, have you?" he asked. Hidan eyeballed him coldly, and Kisame lowered the biscuits and gave him a rueful attempt at a pacifying grin.

"Sorry for being a dick the other night Hidan," he said. "That text... look, I really didn't mean it - I'm sorry. Is Suigetsu alright?"

Hidan had been ready to run straight past without a word - as it was he was still extremely frosty. "Why'nt you call him and find out?" he muttered ungraciously.

"We put him in a cab," Kakuzu said, putting a calming hand on Hidan's arm, sensing how rattled he still was. "He was certainly the worse for wear but nothing a good night's sleep wouldn't fix."

Not entirely true, he thought as he said the words, though, and oddly the protective instinct that Hidan roused in him seemed to have attached itself to Suigetsu as well now. Poor kid. He'd had to hold him as he vomited into a drain on Great Eastern Street, and as they'd sat on the kerb to wait for the taxi he'd even tucked his jacket around him because he was so shivery. Suigetsu had burrowed right into his side and it had just been second nature to put his arm around him, to talk calmly to him about the inane and mundane, distract him from his all-too-apparent misery.

He looked at Kisame with diminishing sympathy. You should leave him alone, he thought.

"Thanks for doing that." Kisame did at least have the grace to look ashamed of himself. "I really messed up there."

"Yes, you did!" Hidan shot back. "You know what - I'm starting to wish I'd never given you his number. I didn't think you'd be the one to dick him around!"

Kisame sighed. "What can I say? I'm damaged goods right now - I'm no good for anyone," he said, and his tone was soggy with self-pity - even he could hear it. He shook his head, feeling disgusted with himself. "But you're right, Hidan. I will try and put things right with him."

He walked thoughtfully back into his flat as Hidan and Kakuzu jogged on up the road and of onto the Heath. He put the cat biscuits away and sat down at the table. Once or twice he let his head drop into his hands before getting a grip on himself. Otherwise he stared fixedly out of the window.

After a little while he reached for his phone. You're a grown man, he thought. There's no excuse for this.

A good night's sleep hadn't been enough to fix Suigetsu - in fact he'd lost an entire day to the hangover that ensued from Yugito's party. And on Sunday morning, as Hidan and Kakuzu headed up the hill, he was still lying in bed in the little box room in the flat he shared with Sasuke, Jugo and Karin (which he'd chosen over the larger bedrooms so that he could pay a lower rent). He'd got up to go to the toilet but then he'd come straight back again, not able to face the day. His headache had gone now but the crushing flatness hadn't, and there didn't seem to be anything to get up for.

Although it had been light for hours, and he'd been lying awake - physically unable to sleep any more - he hadn't bothered to draw the curtains. Now he was having a half-hearted wank in the semi-darkness, and he wasn't even able to muster enough self-control to not make it about Kisame. And as he blew a rather pathetic load into the day before yesterday's scrunched up boxer shorts, the whole brief encounter started playing in his head all over again.

Walking out from the cottage together had been a tense, butterflies in the stomach affair. Little smiles, little thrilling moments of eye contact. It had been a dull day - he knew that - so why was he remembering it as if it was golden sunlight? He didn't want to think about that too hard. Next thing, as they rounded the corner of the high hedge, Kisame's hand had made its way into the back pocket of his jeans, pulling him a little closer. "What're you doing all the way over there?"

He'd laughed - shyly, really, although normally he was anything but shy. He'd had plenty to say by text - by turns bold, provocative, flirtatious - but now he was actually here the reality of it all was a little bit overwhelming. Just the size of Kisame was kind of intimidating, and when you got close enough the scent of him as well - tobacco and sea salt and something else he couldn't place. The pale eyes that seemed to pin you into place.

"You had enough to say by text - cat got your tongue now?" Kisame had said teasingly, mirroring his thoughts, and now Suigetsu thought he remembered a feeling of precariousness, a consciousness of how quickly this opportunity could slip away from him. Or was that just something he was adding in hindsight?

"A bit," he'd admitted.

"Well, that's okay," Kisame had said, taking a few more steps into the field until they were completely hidden from the house and then stopping, turning round to face him fully. Grinning widely. "Not much more to say, is there."

Suigetsu could still make his stomach do the almost sickeningly excited lurch that had elicited just by thinking about it now. Only now it really did make him want to throw up.

His eagerness must have shown in his face. Kisame was laughing at him gently and manoeuvring him around so that his back was against a tree - some massive oak or something but it had felt flimsy compared to Kisame himself - and, "you're a cute kid, aren't you?" he'd murmured. "So fucking cute!"

"Maybe not such a kid as all that!" he'd replied with more bravado than he felt, and he'd wantonly run his hand over the front of Kisame's trousers - felt him stiffen even more at his touch, and looking up into his face he'd been so confident this was going well - Kisame had looked so pleased, almost surprised- "uhh," he'd groaned - still smiling though - "I'd actually started to doubt that anyone as sweet as you could really be up for this..."

"So fucking up for it!" Suigetsu had answered, stretching up to whisper the words right against Kisame's mouth. He kind of hated himself for that, now. Even alone in his bedroom, he cringed.

It had done the trick at the time, though, and once they were kissing everything had progressed smoothly, though Suigetsu's had been heart thumping so hard that he honestly couldn't say now whether Kisame's had been doing the same, or whether he'd been as cool about it then as he was being now - but it hadn't seemed like it. They'd kissed for a while; getting used to each other, figuring each other out. Suigetsu had a tendency to bite a bit which a lot of people weren't up for; Kisame didn't seem to mind that.

Before long they were really getting down to business and although he hadn't really thought of getting further than this in one day he just sort of couldn't stop himself. He remembered now how the zip of his jacket had snagged and his hands were shaking too much to free it - Kisame had had to. And the look on his face as he'd sorted him out was too much to think about right now - he gave a kind of yelping howl of misery into his pillow; thumped his fist on the mattress. But still he couldn't stop thinking about it.

Kisame had thrown his own jacket down onto the grass and settled onto it - he was propped up in one elbow, holding his other arm out invitingly to Suigetsu. He didn't say anything, just raised both eyebrows and grinned. Suigetsu had gone to him without a word as well.

In a few seconds his belt was undone, and his vest top eased over his head - his skinny jeans took Kisame a little more time but with some judicious wriggling on Suigetsu's part it was achieved. Suigetsu had reached again for Kisame's fly, but Kisame had caught his wrist, and pinned his hand above his head. He undid his own belt buckle and fly instead.

"Uh uh," he'd said, chuckling a little. "I'm not ready for you to touch me yet, kid."

"I want to!" Suigetsu gasped protestingly.

"Don't be impatient," he said, a soft murmur at odds with his unyielding grip. "I want to enjoy this - I won't be able to concentrate once you get your little paws on me!"

He'd trailed a finger around Suigetsu's nipple and down towards his dick, which was hard hard hard now - achingly hard, and desperate to be touched. Suigetsu felt it like an electric tingle down his spine as well, and had arced his body towards Kisame with a distinctly impatient moan that had made him laugh again.

"Alright, alright," he'd soothed, getting his hand to it and tracing a finger up the shaft. "I'm getting there..."

Maybe it wasn't just the result of Kisame's powers of concentration - maybe being restrained had something to do with as well - but Suigetsu was putty in his hands from that point onward. Kisame touching and teasing him - enjoying him - all he could do was gasp and moan and focus desperately on not coming shamefully early.

"On your knees, kiddo," was his next command, and Suigetsu scrambled to obey; it was hard, as Kisame was keeping his hands where they were, but he'd managed it. "Let's get to the really fun stuff," he heard him say - then felt his tongue circling his asshole and just fucking melted.

He couldn't even guess how long that part had gone on, but he remembered briefly panicking that he was just going to explode and this would be over. And he didn't want it to be over. "I'm - I'm going to fucking come, Kisame," he managed to force out in between sobbing gasps - nobody had made him feel this intensely before - no-one, and he'd been around the block a few times to say the least.

"That's okay," Kisame had said, his voice somehow husky and silky at the same time (Suigetsu could replay it in his head now, pitch perfect, again and again - that's okay; that's okay- - Stop it! he told himself sharply) "You can go again, no?"

And, "yes! yes!" he'd agreed - desperate to feel Kisame's tongue on him again. And so he'd let himself relax as Kisame resumed his rimming; let him bring him off into his hand, and then collapsed face first - fuck knows how; Kisame must have engineered that as well - into his lap.

Kisame had let him lie there, panting and gasping for a minute, then, "right then, knock yourself out, kid," he'd said, spreading his legs a little wider so that his erect cock was pretty much staring him in the face. And like he'd said to Hidan the other night - Kisame was fucking hung. But he'd gone to town on it, and heard Kisame groan with pleasure above him. His hands now his own again, he'd used every trick in the book to try and give Kisame the blowjob of his life. Which he was still certain he could've done if Kisame hadn't decided to distract him.

It was Kisame's fingers at his ass this time, very slick with his own cum and he was already pretty open. It didn't take long for him to find it hard to concentrate - really hard to concentrate - he'd groaned around his mouthful of cock, felt his technique slipping. Blood was pumping in his ears but he heard Kisame say teasingly, "what your mouth can't finish, your ass is gonna have to take over..." Another finger went in - he moaned again, letting Kisame's cock slip out of his mouth, burying his face in his lap. "Do you have anything with you?" Kisame had asked. He'd just shaken his head. Kisame's fingers eased in and out, in and out. "But you want it?" he asked, voice low. A nod.

Kisame lifted him onto his knees again. "Look, I wouldn't normally-" he began, his voice still a soft, sensual murmur, "But I'm on PrEP anyway so it's fine by me," He grinned suddenly - intense and salacious. "Seems like a waste not to, no?"

"Then it's fine - I'm clear anyway," Suigetsu had replied, words tripping over each other in his haste, heart thumping in anticipation. (It hadn't even occurred to him to wonder why Kisame was on PrEP, though of course it did now. Something to do with Sasuke's brother? But he wouldn't let himself think about it). He'd felt Kisame's fingers slowly withdraw all the way; heard the slick sound of him spreading the rest of the cum from his hand onto his cock. Then-

On his narrow bed in the dim little room he curled into a ball and almost cried. It had felt so good, so unbelievably, overwhelmingly good, and despite how dominant Kisame could be he'd felt so safe with him, so relaxed and happy. When Kisame had cum deep inside him, and he'd simultaneously blown a second load into Kisame's hand, he'd felt exuberant, almost lightheaded. He'd turned and grinned at Kisame and Kisame had grinned back, and they'd both burst into laughter. Kisame had gathered him up into his arms and kissed him - hardly less intensely than at the beginning.

"You okay?" he'd asked.

Yes, yes. He'd been more than okay.

They'd relaxed back onto the ground together. "Sorry to boss you around..." Kisame murmured with a little culpable smile.

"Mm, you can do that, I don't mind..." And he really hadn't.

They'd lain down on Kisame's jacket for a minute, Kisame's arm hard and warm around him. He'd stared up at the cloudy sky; listened to the soft hum of insects around them in the grass. And felt peaceful. He could tell Kisame was looking at him, and he'd been about to turn and face him again, when they'd both felt a buzz from the jacket pocket.

And that had been the beginning of the end.

Kisame had sighed. "Better be getting you back, kiddo," he'd said. "In fact, you run along first - I'll see you in there. We should probably be a bit discreet about this."

Suigetsu had agreed, though he didn't really see why they needed to be discreet - they hadn't really been beforehand, after all. But he'd probably have agreed to anything at that point. Kisame had even had to help him on with his clothes because he found on getting up that he was trembling with exhaustion. "Sure you're okay?" Kisame had asked, and he'd said yes again, and wondered now - not for the first time - how much difference it might have made if he'd said no.

And they'd hugged again, Kisame kissed him briefly on top of his head, then gave him a little push between the shoulderblades, back towards the house. "I'll see you in there," he'd said again. And Suigetsu had walked into the house like he was walking on air. Exhausted but exhilarated; he couldn't stop smiling...

Remembering that was the most painful part, really. As it turned out that would be the last thing Kisame would say to him altogether and now, instead, he couldn't stop the tears - he didn't so much burst into them as dissolve - a helpless downward slide. When Kisame had come into the house and walked past him without a word it was like a rug had been pulled from under his feet. He'd felt the shock like a physical blow. He hadn't even given him even so much as a look and it was all so wrong. Even thought he'd let himself plaster on top of the gaping emotional wound an artificial hope that he'd come back - that this was just Kisame being extra discreet - of course he hadn't, and in his gut he'd always known he wouldn't.

And then Hidan had come over, and he knew he hadn't been able to hide the way he felt for even a single second.

Had it been the text Kisame had received? But what could have been said in a single text message to change everything? Had he had a sudden change of heart? Decided it was a bad idea? But why not say? Why not at least say something? Suigetsu dropped his head onto his folded arms and took a deep breath. At the very least he just needed to know why.

He'd just begun to get a grip on himself and stop the last of his expendable body moisture from leaking out through his face, when he heard a murmur of voices in the hall. Jugo and Karin - Sasuke hadn't been home for nearly a week now. Moments later Jugo knocked on the door.

"I've brought you a cup of tea." His voice was kind - strong and gentle - what Jugo did best. Why don't I fall for guys like Jugo? Suigetsu asked himself. But he couldn't guess the answer to that. He just didn't.

After a few minutes of no reply, Jugo let himself in. He sat down on the bed and put a hand on Suigetsu's shoulder. "Come on, mate," he said, after a moment of silence. "He's made you this unhappy, he's not worth it."

Suigetsu couldn't disagree with his reasoning, but somehow he couldn't accept the conclusion either. He just made a sad little mmph noise into his pillow.

"Drink your tea," Jugo cajoled. "You'll feel better for it - you always do."

Suigetsu nodded, but didn't move. Jugo put the tea down on the bedside table.

"You need a hug?" It was only half a question. Suigetsu nodded again, and let Jugo lift him off the mattress, even curling up helpfully so he could be pulled more easily against his chest. He pressed his face against Jugo's collarbone, enjoying the feel of the thick cotton jersey of his sweatshirt against his cheek. He smelt clean. He knew he must smell of sweat, spunk and tears himself, and admired Jugo's forbearance, letting him get so close. And it did feel better. A bit better.

Jugo shifted them a bit further onto the bed and they leant against the wall, Jugo's arm still comfortingly around him. He reached him his tea for him and Suigetsu sipped it gratefully, feeling it start to ease his dry and achy throat.

They sat in companionable silence until he'd nearly finished the cup, and then Suigetsu began to feel that Jugo was going to Say Something. He wondered if it had been decided on by committee with Karin last night and braced himself. "I know it's not going to do any good if I say forget about him," Jugo began finally, "but-" And then Suigetsu's phone buzzed. Jugo fell silent. They could both read the words that came up on the lock screen.

'Kiddo, I'm sorry for being such a dick. I know I've made you unhappy and believe me I've...'

It was a long text. Well, Kisame was an old-school long-form journalist, after all. Suigetsu rather wished he'd waited for Jugo to leave before opening it.

'...been feeling awful about it ever since,' it continued. 'I'd like to say I thought it would be easier for you if I just disappeared, but that's not it. I knew it wouldn't. I guess I didn't trust myself to stick to it. Not face to face with you. Probably not even if I let myself get drawn into a text convo. I did actually mean to text when I got back to London, but then there was the accident and it changed things. I shouldn't have let things get as far as they did between us, basically - I've recognised that I'm still a mess over someone else and it wouldn't be fair on anyone to get involved with you right now.'

Before he'd even finished reading another came.

'I didn't think it would affect you so badly. I'm really sorry.'

Suigetsu swallowed. He stared at Jugo.

"Is it what you wanted to hear?" Jugo asked flatly.

"Not ... not exactly." But he couldn't keep the excitement out of his tone. Because he could work with this.

"It makes it better though?" Jugo asked.

He nodded. Jugo stared at him, his expression unreadable. Then he got up as well. He picked up Suigetsu's empty mug and headed for the door.

"I've got to go to work," he said, giving Suigetsu's shoulder a squeeze as he passed him. "Just... be careful of yourself this time, okay?"

But Suigetsu was never careful of himself. 'Ok :)' he typed, as soon as Jugo left the room. Let him stew with that for a bit, he wasn't above thinking as he pressed send. He waited until he heard the front door slam, then hot-tailed it to the bathroom and flung himself into the shower.

By the time Hidan and Kakuzu were up on the Heath the sun was breaking through and things felt better. Hidan was managing not to see Sasori's half head every time he blinked; and was even quite enjoying grumbling to Kakuzu about Kisame. Kakuzu mainly just grunted monosyllabic replies. Hidan only realised as he reached the top of Parliament Hill a few paces ahead of him that that might not simply be the result of monosyllabic feelings and eased off the pace a little.

"Well, try to be civil to him, at least," Kakuzu panted as they crossed the common and headed for the woods. "Because it looks like we'll need to do one last favour for the Akatsuki group. Once I've acquired the Uzumaki kid's degree show I'll have the leverage because I don't have to sell it on to Nagato Pein. But in the meantime we shouldn't let them suspect we want out. And Konan's asked me to introduce Kisame to Killer Bee, so we should do that."

Hidan - who knew Killer Bee better than Kakuzu - expressed the opinion that that wasn't likely to be hard. Then, after rather a pregnant pause, he muttered, "They want me to do a shoot with a girl."

"Hm?" Kakuzu grunted casually. But he didn't actually feel very casual about it. Given the timing it was probably an agency attempt at straight-washing - and Hidan's cagey attitude suggested he wasn't unaware of it.

"Yeah they say they've got someone in mind." Hidan slowed to a walk and Kakuzu followed suit. "They say we need to make my portfolio look a bit more versatile..." He looked up at Kakuzu with a grimace.

"Well it's normal isn't it?" Kakuzu gave a resigned shake of his head. "It's expected - the formula of every ad campaign - a beautiful man and a beautiful woman..."

"I have zero fucking interest in being normal." Hidan kicked a stone out of his path.

Kakuzu sighed. "I know." He touched the small of Hidan's back, urging him on again. He was irked and needed to be moving. It might be just a small thing - like he'd said, a normal thing - but why bother to try and paint Hidan as anything he wasn't? It wasn't likely to stick, was it?

But the media seemed to have different ideas, as he found once back home and reading the Sunday papers over toast and coffee while he waited for Hidan to finish in the shower. At least three separate mentions in the fashion section of the Times magazine of what an adorable pair Hidan and Yugito made - one with a description of him as 'sexually fluid' - and finally a suggestion that Kakuzu himself had gone home with Suigetsu. Complete with a picture of him shunting the kid into a taxi. He threw the paper down with a growl of annoyance. He'd already had to look at himself awkwardly fist-bumping Killer Bee in the gossip pages. This was really too much. A teenager? Really?

However, by the time Hidan came downstairs he'd cheered up a little, because at least the presumption that he'd left with Suigetsu meant that his actual exit with Hidan later on had gone unnoticed. That was the important thing, after all. But Hidan was catching up with the news now. He was looking at his work phone in disbelief and gestured dramatically at the screen as he caught Kakuzu's eye on him.

"It says here that I was spotted 'wandering disconsolately through the fashion crowd' as you left the party with Suigetsu!" he raged. "Is the whole world fucking retarded?! Did they not see you very clearly still fucking being there after the taxi fucking drove away?"

Kakuzu pulled him onto his lap because he was still only in his underwear and utterly irresistible. "You were looking disconsolate, weren't you?" he said, taking Hidan's phone and examining the picture, which must have been taken just as he headed backstage to begin his ritual. He closed the phone down. "There there, love. Why are you looking at the Daily Mail, anyway? Mind you, they're even saying in the Times that Yugito is poised to become Mrs Yugito Yu and that you're bisexual... An upgrade from gay art mogul's gay boyfriend, no?"

"I fucking hate it!" Hidan snarled. "I really fucking hate it."

The doorbell rang and Hidan suddenly brightened. He pushed Kakuzu back down into his seat as he made to get up. "No, I'm getting it!" he said, a definite gleam in his eye. He ruffled his hair out of place a little. "Do I look dishevelled enough..?" he asked mischievously.

"Not even nearly," Kakuzu smirked, pulling him back down and proceeding to dishevel him rather a lot more.

By the time he'd finished with him Hidan even had to wait a moment to let his excitement subside a little. He bit his lip, breathing hard and looking at Kakuzu with satisfaction. "Let them fucking try and straight-wash this!" he smiled, then sauntered down the hall with a swagger in his step that left Kakuzu needing a moment to compose himself.

There was a large parcel on the top step when Hidan finally got the front door open, and Killer Bee was at the gate, just leaving. "Oh hi, Hidan!" he called. There was a gratifying flash of at least one press camera - they weren't quite yesterday's news yet, it seemed. Bee switched on his drum machine, which he had hoisted on one shoulder. "Ahh..." he began as the beat kicked in. "Come on...!"

"Ah, fucking hell, Bee," Hidan lolled against the doorframe and rolled his eyes. "At this time in the morning?!"

Bee clearly gave no fucks about the time of day. "I've left a little present there for Kakuzu-" he intoned. "I hope he'll find it useful for the things that you guys do-"

"What, is it a sex toy?" Hidan cast a skeptical eye at the parcel. "It's a big one then!"

Kakuzu came up behind him and put an arm around his waist. "I trust not!" he said as another camera flash went off from behind the hedge. "That's very kind of you, Bee," he continued, unperturbed. "I enjoyed our chat last night - we must have you over for dinner sometime. I'd love to introduce you to a few of our friends as well."

'Ok :)'

Kisame stared at Suigetsu's text for far too long, trying to read meaning into it. For all he'd decided not to get involved, he'd be lying if he said he hadn't hoped for some kind of acknowledgement of his feelings - some kind of closure. It wasn't just the way he still felt about Itachi that had held him back, he had to admit. That half hour with in the field had shown him very clearly just how deep in he could get with Suigetsu, and how easily. And it wasn't a good idea. This inane text just seemed like even more confirmation of the fact that - while he might manage to satisfy him for a while - he was so very young... In fact, too young. Give it a few years and he'd be sure to get itchy feet and cause him the kind of heartbreak he wasn't sure he could bounce back from a second time. Best, really, to not even start that kind of thing.

Eventually he decided that he'd go for a run on the Heath as well. It would take his mind off things.

When he got to the top he sat down on the grass and leant back on his elbows, looking out over London and allowing his thoughts to settle along with his pounding heart. He wondered how Itachi was doing, and thought about calling him when he got back home. But he surprised himself by not wanting to. It struck him suddenly that while he'd been acting like one half of a celibate couple for years now, Itachi had not been. He really didn't mean as much to Itachi as Itachi had meant to him. A good friend, with shared interests - nothing more. And as he tumbled to that flattening realisation, all the desire to hear his voice - and see him, hold him - sort of drained out of him.

It was replaced with a sick-feeling real-world jolt of shame at having been such a moon-calf for so long. Perhaps it was having finally texted Suigetsu - cue another jolt of shame - but he realised as well that he'd made Itachi and his health an excuse for all kinds of bad behaviour. His impersonal hook-ups with no attempt to get close people; his neglect of other friendships. Even his tendency to become boorish and ill-mannered with people he slightly fancied (and he knew that repeatedly doing this with Hidan was testing his friendship with Kakuzu perhaps more than it could take). Was it all because he hoped that some crumbs of love from Itachi might still drop his way?

He watched with detached fascination as a flight of crows rose from the field beyond the tree line. Itachi had always loved watching them. They wheeled around and flew overhead, then circled back. And he resolved that there was going to be no more mooning about after people. He'd focus on his work, and on his friends. He'd go surfing and he'd do some serious walking. Alone. And he'd let himself recover. This had been an obsession that had consumed him for too long to just flick a switch and expect to be back to normal.

He got up and broke into a run, setting a faster pace than he usually did. He wanted to feel the burn of something purely physical and forget about emotion completely.

"Did I fucking hear you right?" Hidan said through an ever-widening grin as they finally closed the door. (Killer Bee had been delighted at the prospect of deepening their acquaintance and had insisted on serenading them with a new composition of his that they had apparently inspired the other night). "We're having a fucking party? Are you serious, man?"

"I said dinner," Kakuzu protested in alarm. "I didn't say the word 'party'-" Suddenly he was stricken with doubt. "Did I?"

"Same fucking difference, man." Hidan was undoing the parcel. "Let's see what we have here!" he said, smoothing open the paper. Then he went quiet. Kakuzu leant over his shoulder and his mouth dropped open in horror. Without doubt, this was something from Bee's own sportswear line. It was - he supposed - running kit, and it was the blingyist, most over the top, most tasteless thing he'd ever seen.

Hidan let out a snort of laughter and then creased up completely. "Ahhhh...hahahahaha!" he howled, eyes streaming with mirth. Uhhhh-huh-huh-huh! Fuck! You're gonna have to wear this shit Kakuzu! You'll have to! He'll be mortally fucking wounded otherwise and he won't wanna come to your party!"

Kakuzu, tightlipped, was shaking his head, denial and disbelief etched across his frozen features. "I can't," he uttered dramatically. "God knows, I've taken one for the team before, but I can't do this. It's beyond the pale."

Hidan was fingering the gold appliqué lettering on the back of the top part - sleeveless and of a dazzling whiteness - it said 'art mogul'. "I reckon he's had this made up for you specially!" he said gleefully. Kakuzu dropped his face into his hands.

Hidan cackled with delight. "Over the weekend too!" he pointed out. "You must've made a hit with him! Turning on the charm while I was working, huh? Keeping your hand in? Honing your smooth smooth schmoozing skills..?"

"Oh shut up. I don't think I could've been less charming if I'd tried!" Kakuzu claimed, utterly mortified, folding the paper back over the offending articles with a brisk crackle. "All I did was come up with a rhyming couplet!"

"Awwww, whats the matter?!" Hidan danced around him as he made his way back to the kitchen. "Look at you - you're all disappointed! You thought it was going to be something nice... aww, Kakuzuuuu...!"

"Shut up, Hidan..." Kakuzu growled.

"Fucking make me," Hidan laughed, hanging off his shoulders. "You're blushing, Kakuzu. I'm right aren't I? You were expecting a nice first edition or something..."

Well, he had asked for it, Kakuzu considered thirty seconds later when he was asking himself if he ought to feel bad for pinning Hidan backwards over the kitchen table and forcibly stuffing three-quarters of a croissant into his mouth. On balance, he didn't regret it. Hidan was doggedly chewing, though; he probably only had five seconds of peace left, at most. He decided to spend it on re-reading his bank statement. That was always satisfying.

Kisame left the door open when he came back into the house because the day was warm. He'd worked up quite a sweat too, so he headed straight for the shower. If he heard noises, such as light footsteps, or the scrape of chair legs on linoleum, he put it down to Samehada returning from whatever nocturnal adventures had overrun this time. He emerged feeling relaxed and pleasantly tired, and wandered back into the kitchen - towel around his waist - to get last night's leftovers from the fridge because he'd worked up quite an appetite as well.

And there was Suigetsu - sitting at his kitchen table and playing with Samehada. She was lying on her back, slashing with all four sets of claws his fingertips as he whisked them repeatedly out of reach. There was a ball of scrunched up newspaper that he'd tied to a string lying on the table; clearly not high-risk enough for him.

"Hey," he said lightly, barely looking up.

Kisame was speechless for a moment.

"... what. the fuck. are you doing in my kitchen?" he asked, finally. He adjusted his towel and perched on the edge of the table - he hoped nonchalantly.

"Making you see me face to face." Suigetsu clearly wasn't fucking around this time and he looked up properly now. Behind the lop-sided grin, Kisame felt like he could see the strain of the last few weeks. Maybe he was a little thinner. Shadows under his eyes. That sweet happy kid... You fucking monster, he berated himself.

Still. He had some nerve. "It wasn't an invitation," he said. But Suigetsu just looked at him, and he gave up the nonchalant act - crossed over to him and shooed Samehada off the table. He put a hand under his chin and tilted his face up so he could look him right in the eye. "This is exactly why I'm no good for you, kiddo," he said quietly. "Look at you - this deep in and we only fucked once. Come on, let me get some clothes on and I'll walk you to the tube."

Suigetsu shook his head. "Not til you at least tell me what happened. What changed."

"..."

Kisame couldn't. So after a moment of awkward silence he fell back on bluster and bullshit. "Look, okay - we fancied each other," he said defensively. "We had a quick hook-up; we both had a good time - but that's the end of it, okay? I'm not looking for a relationship."

"Couldn't we just... hook-up again?" Suigetsu suggested.

"Kid, it doesn't work like that."

"It could."

Kisame opened his mouth, then closed it again. Suddenly - and he'd known this would happen - he couldn't get a proper grasp in his head of why he was trying not to do this. And while he stood there like a lemon Suigetsu took matters into his own hands.

"You didn't let me finish, the other day."

"Wha-?" Kisame began, but - oh god - Suigetsu was tugging away his towel, slipping onto the floor in front of him, his hands sliding up Kisame's thighs, his tongue circling around the tip of his already half hard cock.

Kisame gripped the back of a chair as Suigetsu drew him deeper into his mouth. He knew he should put a stop to this, but he didn't say 'stop' - or make any move to push Suigetsu away. He realised - semi incoherently - that if he did try to stop him, he'd still be hoping that Suigetsu would just carry on regardless. Which was ridiculous. Wasn't it?

He stifled a groan as Suigetsu got into his stride. "Fuck..." he moaned, his fingers twisting into his hair. "Fuck Suigetsu...! This is... We shouldn't... uhh..."

He shot a panicky little glance out of the window. By this time at the weekend the road got fairly busy with passers by - not to mention the constant press presence outside Kakuzu's house - but he decided Suigetsu was probably decently hidden by the table. Even if he hadn't been, he wasn't sure if he could have found the resolve to stop him. He didn't feel like he had resolve for anything at this point. Even his body didn't seem to be obeying him; one of his legs started trembling and he leant harder on the chair back, which creaked ominously.

Suigetsu looked up at him briefly, then reached around him to pull out one of the other chairs with a horrendous shriek of wood on tiles. He pushed him down into it, tugging him to the edge of the seat and pushing his legs wide. His hands smoothed up over Kisame's abdomen and back down along his thighs, then slipped between them again. Smooth fingertips caressed his balls and Kisame tipped his head back, biting his lip and not caring anymore how much noise he made. All his resolutions went out of the window.

Over at Kakuzu's house, Hidan - after having dealt with his entirely different kind of mouthful and then bitched for some time about having overloaded with carbs now - had sat Kakuzu down with a pen and a pad of paper and was forcing him to plan his party. They'd decided they might as well kill as many birds as they possibly could with one stone and use this as a schmoozing opportunity for potential influential art and fashion connections.

"Well," Hidan said brightly. "Drinks or dinner...?"

"Dinner, I suppose - might as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb," Kakuzu replied moodily. "You can count on some idiot getting sozzled either way, though." He was still upset about the running kit.

"Well, on that joyous note - guests?" Hidan tipped up his chair and looked up at the ceiling. "Kisame and Killer Bee, obviously - who else."

"Yugito..." Kakuzu said, writing the three names down. "And I thought we might also introduce Kisame to Kim..."

"What the fuck?" Hidan stared, dismayed. "Why is Kimimaro anyone we want to schmooze?"

"The association is good for my reputation," Kakuzu said. "Now that all that medical nonsense has come to light. And if he can cement a working relationship with Kisame for us, so much the better."

"Why can't we have Suigetsu instead of Kimimaro?"

Kakuzu picked up the list again. "That would be explosive and you know it, Hidan. For whatever reason, Kisame doesn't want to go down that path and we need to respect that. I thought Kim might be an interesting alternative for him."

Hidan made a face. "Why the fuck-?"

"Well..." Kakuzu shrugged. He didn't really want to say it was because Kimimaro had something of the same look as Hidan and Suigetsu - Hidan wouldn't appreciate that at all - so he chose his words carefully. "He looks the part," he settled for, finally. "And he's a decent age for him, at least," he added, slightly judgementally.

"Hm." Hidan rocked back on his chair and raised and eyebrow. "I don't buy it man. I reckon Kim would drive Kisame up the fucking wall."

"Well, whatever, I need to keep up friendly relations with him now, or I wouldn't put it past him to be talking to the press about us."

Hidan narrowed his eyes. "You remember what you said about him just wanting you in the operating theatre for a good dinner party anecdote? Well, what if he makes that this dinner party?"

"He'd better not," Kakuzu said shortly, and wrote his name down anyway.

"I'm sorry not to involve Konan," he said, feeling it was best to move swiftly on, "but I feel she's a ... difficult prospect right now. Perhaps Karin instead."

"Yeah fine," Hidan said sulkily.

"Zabuza has been making overtures since the funeral," Kakuzu continued, ignoring his tone. "Perhaps we should give him a try. I'm fed up with his work but I do own quite a lot. Perhaps if he got involved with you he'd get back on form. Either way, it would be good publicity for you both."

Hidan did a weird sort of half shrug, half nod. "Yeah maybe," he said. "Alright, invite him then. You gonna play matchmaker for Karin too?"

"No," Kakuzu said shortly. "She needs to stop thinking about romance and focus on her career."

"So is that it? We're a bit light on the ladies, aren't we? That will piss Yugito off."

He looked over at the list with a critical eye. Kisame, Kim, Killer Bee, Yugito, Zabuza, Karin... "Can I invite anyone? he asked. It was very obviously a loaded question.

"Don't you think six is enough?" Kakuzu said disingenuously.

Hidan didn't think six was enough. He said what if no one liked each other, and made several completely unsuitable suggestions, including Kabuto and Orochimaru.

Kakuzu snorted. "You have a vested interest in this being a complete melee, don't you? Are you trying to start a war?"

Hidan muttered that at least it would be interesting. Kakuzu put the list aside. "Look," he said. "I'm not trying to put together a social occasion that you'll hate-"

Hidan shook his head and picked the list up again. "Seriously though. Ladies," he said.

Kakuzu agreed that it was a problem, but unfortunately neither of them were the type of gay guy who ran with a crowd of girlfriends. He watched Hidan doodle a cock in the margin and frowned thoughtfully.

"Mei Terumi..." he said finally, taking the pen from Hidan and tapping it on the table. "I wonder if she would- her work is fantastic... so versatile..."

"The head of Goldsmiths?" Hidan laughed. "Better invite a straight guy for her then..."

"... isn't Killer Bee...?"

"Oh yeah..."

"And who knows about Zabuza - he used to fuck anything that moved back in the 90s."

"Partnered up now though."

"Really? I didn't know - we'll have to invite his partner too, then. That's good, actually - an even number is better."

"So that's it?"

"That's it." Kakuzu picked up the list and got up from the table. "I'd better start making phone calls - it would be good to get this done and dusted before the retrospective."

Hidan shot him a sultry look and raised one eyebrow. Kakuzu smiled. "And then maybe we'll see about working off that carb overload..." he added.

Well I hope you all enjoyed a double dose of KisaSui! Back to some proper KakuHida next time I promise!

As always, let me know your thoughts and you'll speed the next chapter along!