Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Stephenie Meyer owns it all. I am merely having fun with her characters.

Author's Note: HUGE shout out & thank you to my beta dolphin62598 for getting these chapters back to me so quickly! And another big thanks to my pre-reader teacher1209 for reading over these and giving me her thoughts! Another BIG shout out and thank you to LunaEclipse17 for creating the kick ass banner for this story! You can check it out on my Facebook page. Song Inspirations for this chapter: Second Chance by 38 Special & Wake Up Loving You by Old Dominion.

Chapter 8

EPOV

Wake Up Loving You

It had been about eight months since Bella had left Forks, taking what was left of my heart with her. I had no use for a heart now anyway.

My divorce from Tanya was going to be final in less than a month and shockingly it was non-contested. She kept to her word about us splitting things fairly and she just wanted out of our sham of a marriage as badly as I did.

Which made me feel more confident that she was still seeing someone on the side but I did not give a fuck anymore.

Oh…well yes, I did give a fuck…to anything with tits.

I had been fucking my way through Forks quite nicely. Nurses at the hospital were begging for it from me but I refused. I would never do that shit at work ever again.

When I was off work, it was on. I was letting Tanya keep the house in the divorce. I had no use for it. I hooked myself up with a nice bachelor pad in the nicest apartment complex Forks had to offer.

My bed was getting quite the workout. I would go for drinks after work, find someone to my liking, bring her back to my place, fuck her brains out and send her packing. No one would ever touch my heart again.

The problem was, every girl I bedded had the same face.

Bella

As hard as I tried, I could not stop visualizing her while I fucked these other women. Some of them were pretty pissed when I actually even called out her name as I came. Every morning I still woke up with the same pain in my chest and longing in my heart. Longing for something that would never be.

When I woke up this morning, I knew I should have stayed in bed. My father cornered me at the hospital and told me my attendance was expected at my parents' house tonight for a family dinner.

He lectured me on ignoring him and my mom's phone calls for the last few days and my mom would be extremely upset if I was a no-show.

I loved my parents very much. It was just hard to see them so happy when deep down I knew they had what I always truly wanted. Their relationship was amazing.

I did as any dutiful son would do, and showed up to my parents house when I was expected to. I was helping Mom by setting the table when Dad received a phone call that he went to his office to take. She was putting the finishing touches on the lasagna and salad she had made for dinner.

"So how is work, sweetie?" Mom asked making small talk.

We both knew there was a big elephant in the room and her name was Tanya.

"Work is good, Mom."

She was using the tongs to toss the salad and asked, "And the divorce?"

There it was.

As I was placing the silverware around the table, I answered nonchalantly. "Going through smoothly. Tanya isn't fighting anything. We agree on everything and it should be final in less than a month."

"I'm glad to hear that."

I could hear it in her voice. There was something more she wanted to say. I set down the last set of silverware where dad would be sitting.

"Yes, Mother?"

"Don't give me that tone, Edward. I was just going to say…I'm really happy you and Tanya are getting a divorce. I have always felt that she wasn't a good match for you."

I smiled softly. I loved my mom. I was instantly saddened by the look I saw on her face. It was such pride for her son. She was proud of me…she always had been. She would not be so proud of me now if she knew what a man whore I had turned myself into. In that moment, I vowed to do better by my sweet, caring mother. She deserved a better son than me. I was really good at letting everyone I loved down and disappointing them.

"Thank you, Mom. I've made a mess of my life but it means the world to me that you still think so highly of me."

She walked over to me and placed her hand delicately on my cheek. "I love you, Edward. Nothing will ever change that. Good things are in your future, you mark my words, son."

I scooped her up in a hug and said, "Thanks Mom. I love you too."

When I put her back on her feet, she was laughing. "Okay, now go wash your hands and get your father off the phone. It is family dinner time!"

I was shaking my head chuckling on my way to the guest bathroom downstairs. Grown man and my mother was still telling me to go wash my hands before dinner.

Nice.

After washing my hands, I went to the office to retrieve my father. His door was cracked open a little and I did not mean to listen at first…but then I heard Bella's name.

"Bella, that's wonderful news! Yes, Dr. Volturi told me he is quite happy with you. I expressed to him that I was saddened by your departure but I knew you would be a good fit there."

There was a pause; I guessed he was listening to what Bella was telling him. He laughed.

"How exciting! You will have one of each then. Thank you for sharing such good news with me. Can I ask you the names you have picked? Good strong names. I like them. Esme will want to speak with you, you know. Yes, I will go get her for you right now. She will be so excited to hear from you. Thank you for calling us Bella and letting us know how you are doing. We worry about you."

I heard him coming towards the door and ran back to the bathroom. I didn't want Dad to know I had been listening to his call.

My father's words to Bella on the phone were swirling around in my head.

One of each…her twins. She would have a boy and a girl.

What names had she picked?

What would they look like?

There it was…that nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach that had been there since I first heard of Bella's pregnancy from Tanya. No matter how much I tried to push it away, it continued to return.

I heard Dad go into the kitchen and talk to Mom but their voices were muffled and I couldn't make out a word either one said. Once I heard Mom walk past the bathroom I knew the coast was clear.

I decided to leave the bathroom finally and went to the kitchen to see Dad sitting there picking cherry tomatoes out of the salad.

"You know if Mom catches you doing that she is going to smack your hand," I laughed as I sat down across from him.

"Shhh…don't you dare tell her," he chuckled back with me.

"Dad…you were on the phone with Bella weren't you?"

I had to ask. I had to know why he was in contact with her. I knew my parents always adored Bella. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't jealous that they got to hear her voice, while I was left to only left to dream of it. Hearing her name, knowing she was on the other end of the phone with my dad, made me miss her all over again.

Truth be told, my ache for her had never really gone away to begin with. I just did a damn fine job of trying to dull it…until now.

"Yes, son. Is there a reason for that melancholy look on your face? What is wrong with me talking to Bella? She is a former employee of mine and was a great asset to our hospital. I thought you enjoyed working with Bella and considered her a friend?"

For some reason, it felt as if he was fishing for information.

Should I come clean with my father about the affair? Tanya was out of the picture now so what did it matter? It would be nice to have someone to talk to about my situation with her. In addition, if Dad knew the truth, maybe he would give me all the information he knew about her since she left Forks.

"It was Bella," I said quietly.

"Yes, Bella was who I was speaking with on the phone. But why do you look like someone kicked your puppy because of that?"

"No…Dad, it was Bella…the woman I had an affair with…"

My dad looked solemn…but not surprised.

"Oh, so you finally admit it?" I turned in my chair as I heard my mother's voice behind me. She was standing there staring at me with her arms crossed over her chest looking at me with disapproval.

I guess she was finished talking to Bella on the phone.

"Yes, Esme. Our son is finally coming clean with us."

He held his hand out to her and she walked to him and sat on his lap. That was the kind of relationship my parents had. At their age, they still did cute romantic things such as that. While it was hard to think of my parents as a couple at times, I loved that about them.

"Talk to us, Edward. Please. We suspected for a while due to your actions…on both your part and Bella's. But please, explain everything to us," Mom said softly.

Over the next thirty minutes, I went in to detail about my affair with Bella. Obviously, not intimate details…but every other detail that I could offer to them.

By the time I was finished, they were both sitting there looking at me, non-judgmental, not angry…just sad.

Mom looked down at Dad and said, "Oh honey, I told you they were perfect for each other!" She kissed him quick on the lips and looked towards me.

"So…were you two always careful when having sex?"

Seriously Mom?

I did not respond to that at first. I was shocked. Neither of my parents were lecturing me about how affairs were wrong and I was a bad person. Neither of them were telling me what an ass I had been to Bella. Neither of them even looked surprised in any way. And I knew where my mom was going with that question.

She wanted to know if she had grandbabies on the way.

"First mom, you need to know…Bella's twins are not mine. Before she left Forks, she confirmed that fact. The twins belong to Paul." I said his name with disgust and there was a twinge in my heart at admitting that her babies did not belong to me.

Before my mom could speak, I continued. "Please let me finish what I have to say. I need answers from you two. Why don't you look shocked that Bella was the woman I was having an affair with? Why aren't you telling me how wrong it was to cheat on Tanya? Why aren't you telling me how much of an ass I was to string Bella along the way that I did? I just need to know…why?"

"Edward, do you know it was wrong to cheat on Tanya and to string Bella along?" My mother asked calmly.

I nodded.

"Sweetie, you are all grown up. What good is yelling at you and lecturing you going to do? I would hope that I have raised you to be the kind of man who realizes when he has made mistakes and fixes them without repeating them."

She had a point. It was Dad's turn to talk. "As far as our lack of surprise about the affair, one would have to be blind to not see the connection between you and Bella, son."

We did have an amazing connection…did being the key word.

"Your father is right. I knew it the night you were both over here for dinner. Your eyes followed each other around the room. I don't know how to describe it other than…it reminded me of your father and I."

"Why did you guys look so sad when I told you? Was it because you are disappointed in me?"

Mom answered very quickly, "Edward, we're disappointed that your life isn't going the way you would like. You're our son and we will always love you no matter what. We are sad because you've lost the woman you love. But now…you need to decide what to do about it."

"There's nothing for me to do, Mom. She left Forks to get away from me. She moved on with Paul and their children. She will never take me back while she is seeing someone else, let alone pregnant with his twins."

"Well that is a defeatist's attitude if I ever heard one, Edward Cullen!"

Was my mother seriously telling me to go after a woman that was already in a relationship with someone else?

"Esme," my father said gently. He looked at me as he continued, "What your mother means is surely there is something you can do to make amends with Bella. Have you talked to her since she left Forks? Maybe things are not as they seem. She may be more open to speaking to you than one would think. You never know."

"Why? What do you know? Are she and Paul still together? You just talked to her Dad. Please tell me what is going on in her life other than the fact she is having a boy and a girl."

"It's not polite to eavesdrop, Edward," my mom chastised.

"My conversation with Bella was private and I'm not giving you any information. If you want to know what is going on in her life, you're going to have to find out for yourself."

Dad was right. If he and Mom broke Bella's trust, she would stop speaking to them. I knew how much they cared about her so it would be fair to no one.

"Now, it has been a long day and this wonderful meal your mother prepared is getting cold," Dad said as he lifted mom from his lap. "Shall we eat?"

"But…what am I supposed to do about Bella?"

Mom sat down in the chair between my dad and I and said, "Edward, remember I told you I expect you to know how to fix your mistakes. Give it your best shot my sweet boy."

With that, no one else said a word about Bella. But on my way out the door that night, my mother slipped a piece of paper in my hand with nothing on it but a phone number. As she hugged me she whispered, "I suspect you know what to do with this."

I nodded and hugged her that much tighter.

Later that night, I was mulling over in my head the pros and cons of calling Bella. I needed to see her. I went to Bella's Facebook account and tried to see if I could look her up. We were friends before we broke up because we were co-workers so no one would think that was odd. But when we split, I knew she had unfriended me.

I was able to find her by her name so she didn't block me completely. Maybe that was a good sign. Damn it…she had it set so private that all I could see was her profile picture. She was as breathtaking as ever in it. She was in the middle of two girls, a tall blonde and a short brunette and they were rubbing her huge belly making silly faces. Leah was behind Bella with her arms wrapped around her also rubbing her belly and she was laughing and playfully sticking her tongue in Bella's ear. Bella was there in the center, radiating happiness. She had her eyes closed and nose crinkled but you could tell she was laughing so hard at the silliness in the picture.

I was able to click on it and read the comments.

Leah Clearwater…Awww you made this your profile pic! Love it sis!

Alice Whitlock…Bells! This pic is the best what a fun day! Your baby shower was amazing! It was so great to finally meet you Leah! Can't wait to be Aunties with you!

Leah Clearwater…Thanks Ali! It was awesome to meet you guys too. Can't wait to come back and hang some more. Thanks for taking care of my sis since I live so far away. Catch you later short stuff!

Alice Whitlock…LOL

Rose McCarty…Excuse me bitches but you forgot someone. Jeez! Bells is MY baby mama you know? With our love children?

Emmett McCarty…Rosie, did you say baby mama? Are you & Bells doing it? Hahahaha. Don't slap me when you come upstairs LOL.

Rose McCarty…OMG sorry you guys. I'm kicking him off Facebook now. LOVE YOU LADIES! Leah you kick ass! Come back soon. Welcome any time at the McCarty house!

Alice Whitlock…The Whitlock house too!

Bella Swan…I love you guys! I really do have the best friends and family a girl and her babies could ask for! Thank you for the amazing shower! It was the best day.

I found myself smiling at reading the comments. Bella had made friends and a life for herself in Phoenix. I loved how happy she looked in her profile picture. I wanted to call her so badly but so many thoughts were plaguing me.

How would she react?

Would she even answer my call?

Did she even remember my phone number?

She was probably going to hang up on me. A part of me felt as if I should just leave it alone and let her be happy with Paul.

I was listening to the oldies station on my radio and a song I had not heard in a long time came on. Second Chance by 38 Special.

Since you been gone

I feel my life slipping away

I Look to the Sky

And everything is turning grey

All I made was one mistake

How much more will I have to pay

Why can't you think it over

Why can't you forget about the past

When love makes this sound baby

A heart needs a second chance

Don't put me down babe

Can't you see I love you

Since you've been gone I've been in a trance

This heart needs a second chance

Don't say it's over, I just can't say goodbye

I just needed her to hear me out and give me one chance to say all I needed to say. I knew there was still the issue of me not wanting kids between us but I was sure we could figure it out.

Every time I thought of her and those babies, there was a nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach I could not get rid of. I would have to be honest with her about the man whore I had turned into while she was gone and pray she would want me back. I would do anything to be with her at this point.

Talking to my parents about her opened me up to all the emotions regarding Bella I had tried to suppress the last few months.

So this is love

Standing in the pouring rain

I fooled on you

But she never meant a thing

And I know I ain't got no right

To ask you to sympathize

But why can't you think it over

Why can't you forget about the past

Tanya never meant to me what Bella did. I needed her to understand that without her I truly was nothing. I was a shell of the man that I could be with her by my side.

Life was beautiful with Bella in it. Without her, I was just going through the motions and dulling the pain of losing her.

I had my cell phone in my hand, and I just needed the courage to dial.

Was I going to be able to make my fingers push the buttons that they needed to?

Author's Note: Thank you guys so much for reading! I know Edward has a long way to go but maybe this chapter will make you start to feel a teeny eeny bit better about him? Maybe? Just a little? You know what to do. I have a snippet of Chapter 9 from Bella. Will he or won't he call her? Stay tuned…

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