What friends will do for friends.
The other day, Jose went to the doctor for a digestive problem. The doctor told him that the illness was quite serious, but it could be cured with a series of two suppositories which would have to be administered up his butt. Jose's, not the doctor's.
"So what did you do?" I asked my friend.
"What could I do, Ana?" Jose told me. "I bent over and let the doctor insert the first suppository."
"Oh, you poor thing," I sympathized.
Jose nodded his head in agreement.
"But that's not the worst part," he said.
"It's not?"
"No."
"Then what is?"
"Well," he said, sheepishly, "I haven't inserted my second suppository yet."
"Why not?"
"I can't reach back there to insert it properly."
That's when I knew what he had in mind.
"Oh, no," I told him, "there's no way I'm going to..."
So there I was, with Jose bending over in front of me, his cheeks spread wide. I put one hand on his shoulder to steady myself, and with the other I pushed the medicine home.
"OH, MY GOD!" Jose screamed.
"Osh-kosh, by gosh," I said, "I didn't hurt you, did I?"
"No," Jose sputtered, "but I just realized that when the doctor did that... he had BOTH hands on my shoulders!"