Chapter 229

Tegan tried to sleep on the cot they prepared for her next to Lindsey's bed but couldn't. She was certain that the only reason Lindsey seemed to be sleeping was because of pain medication. Tegan kept running through the statement Lindsey gave to the police in her mind. She felt so helpless. Every time she thought about that man touching her love she felt as if she was on the verge of a panic attack. She eventually got up and stood next to Lindsey's bed for a few minutes, softly touching her arm. She moved to the window and sat on the windowsill staring into the city lights. In the early hours of the morning she started drifting off only to be pulled back by Lindsey's moaning in bed.

Lindsey moaned louder but Tegan couldn't make words out. Lindsey's face was full of pain. "Baby wake up, Linds…. Babe wake up" said Tegan softly shaking Lindsey's shoulders. Lindsey woke up with a gasp as a nurse came running in.

"Tegan…" Lindsey gasped.

"I'm right here… it's okay, it was just a dream" said Tegan holding her wife.

"I want to go home" said Lindsey sounding emotional.

"I know honey, hopefully in the morning okay" said Tegan and kissed Lindsey's forehead.

The nurse checked Lindsey's vitals and neuro reflexes before injecting something into her IV. Lindsey drifted off again fast.

"That should knock her out for the rest of the night, you should get some sleep" smiled the nurse.

"Easier said than done" snorted Tegan.

"I can get one of the doctors to prescribe something to help you sleep?" said the nurse.

"No! I'm okay, thank you" said Tegan fast.

Tegan fell into a restless sleep hours later in a chair next to Lindsey's bed. It felt as if she had only been asleep for a few minutes when a commotion around Lindsey's bed awoke her.

A few medical personnel were discussing something at the foot of the bed, Lindsey was awake and staring into space.

"Morning sweetie" Tegan said getting up. Her back was stiff and sore.

"Morning" Lindsey smiled sadly.

"How are you feeling?" asked Tegan.

"Ready to go home. You look like you're ready too" said Lindsey.

"I'm fine baby" said Tegan squeezing Lindsey's hand.

Owen turned to them.

"Morning Tegan. We just gave Lindsey a thorough once over. Everything looks fine. Lindsey, all your neuro obs are normal, vital signs are looking good. There doesn't seem to be any significant internal bleeding from the kidney contusion. You will probably be peeing blood for a couple of days though. If your pain increases instead of getting better you need to check back in with us. Those ribs are going to be sensitive for a while, give it time and remember to breathe normally as much as possible in order to prevent fluid build-up in the lungs. The facial bruises are going to take their time. I'll give you some ointment and some herbal tablets that may improve healing time. I'm going to let you go home in an hour or two, after some breakfast. Dr Morgan is outside and she assured me that she will personally be taking care of you" said Owen.

"Thank you" said Lindsey looking pale.

"Tegan, you can come with me to sign the paperwork" said Owen.

"Oh… ok, thank you Dr Hunt, for everything" said Tegan.

"My pleasure" he smiled.

"Baby… I'll be back in just a minute or two okay" said Tegan kissing Lindsey's fingertips.

"Okay sweetie" sighed Lindsey.

As Tegan left the room Kate entered.

"Hey Linds, how are you feeling today?" asked Kate.

"Fine" sighed Lindsey looking annoyed and tired.

"I'll make sure you're okay at home" said Kate.

"That's not necessary, I'll be okay. But thanks…. Kate just… do me a favour, get Tegan out of here for a while. She needs some fresh air and she needs to eat. I apparently have to force some breakfast down too and I'd like to take a shower before we leave. I don't want her helping me… the nurse can do that"

"Are you sure, she'll want to help"

"I don't want her to okay… please" Lindsey pleaded.

"Okay… relax, everything is going to be okay" said Kate patting Lindsey's thigh.

Tegan walked back into the room looking like death warmed up.

"Looks as if you didn't get much sleep last night" said Kate.

"I'm fine… you ready to go baby?" asked Tegan.

"Tee… please go and have breakfast with Kate"

"No I'm fine I…"

"Please, they want me to eat first too and Kate said there's one more test that… yeah… they have to remove the IV and stuff…" Lindsey lied.

"I don't want to leave you" said Tegan softly while touching Lindsey's cheek.

"I want you to"

"Linds… it's not a big de…"

"Tegan please…. You look like you're about to go down. It will make me feel better knowing you've eaten and gotten some fresh air… please baby" Lindsey pleaded.

Tegan swallowed hard.

"Okay… fine… I have my phone with me if you need me" said Tegan.

"Thanks Boo… see you soon"

Tegan plonked her tray down on one of the cafeteria tables and sighed dramatically as she sat down opposite Kate.

"You okay bud?" asked Kate.

"Yeah I guess… just… I can get rid of that nauseous feeling… as if somebody just punched me in the gut you know" said Tegan.

"I know… It's going to take time but it will get better"

"How would you know?" snapped Tegan.

Kate stayed quiet for a few seconds.

"I know because I had that same feeling when Sara was attacked and almost… well… you know" said Kate trying to stay in control.

"Oh god… I'm sorry Kate. I wasn't thinking" said Tegan and squeezed Kate's hand.

"Don't sweat it" said Kate and started eating.

"Sara must be thrilled that you're here" said Tegan sarcastically.

"I feel about a million times better. I'm fine. She's okay with it. Just came to check on Lindsey, I'll be heading home as soon as you do"

"Good… and thank you Kate. You're just… always there for us" said Tegan.

"You look terrible Tee… sorry… you really should try and get some rest today"

"Uh huh" grunted Tegan.

"So… Sara and I made up our minds about the wedding. We're having it up at the lake house" said Kate.

"Oh… wow, great" said Tegan.

"Sooo many important things in our relationship happened there. We just love it there. It will only be our closest family so it will work perfectly. We've got four rooms in the house for us and our siblings. There's a beautiful house not even half a mile up the road that we can rent for the parents"

"Sounds great! Can't wait to see you two get married and I seriously cannot wait to get out of town for a bit"

"Hang in there Tegan" said Kate sincerely.

Tegan suddenly became emotional and put her head in her hands to hide her tears.

Kate gave her space as she struggled to contain her tears by taking deep breaths.

"Hi, Tegan. Can I please have a photo with you?" said a young guy. Tegan didn't look up, her hands still shielding her eyes.

"Dude, now really isn't a good time" said Kate standing up.

"Why don't you let her tell me that"

"Seriously, she's having a private moment"

Tegan waved her hand looking tired after wiping her eyes.

"Look man… as you can see, I look like hell. Could we please take a rain check? Give me your details and I'll get my manager to send you comp tickets and backstage passes for our next LA show" said Tegan, her eyes puffy and red.

"I'm… sheez, I'm sorry Tegan. I'm so rude. That's not necessary, please forgive me" said the guy retreating when he saw Tegan's bloodshot eyes.

"No really, it's okay" said Tegan.

"I feel like a total prick… but thanks" said the guy handing Tegan a business card.

"No problem, take care" said Tegan.

"You too… you okay?" said the guy concerned.

"I'm fine… really. Sorry about all this"

"You're amazing" smiled the guy and turned away.

"Take care Tegan" he said over his shoulder.

"That was incredible" said Kate and smiled.

"What?" said Tegan pushing around her breakfast.

"How you… the incredible emotional intelligence you just showed dealing with that"

Tegan just shrugged.

"I'm not hungry, let's go" said Tegan.

"I promised Lindsey I'll get you to eat"

Tegan shook her head and bit into a muffin looking a bit disgusted by it.

"It will help for that nauseous feeling"

"No… it will make it worse but whatever. Whatever the wife wants"

-o-

Tegan found Lindsey sitting on the bed, showered and fully dressed.

"Baby I thought I would be helping you in the shower? I'm sorry, I took too long with breakfast" said Tegan sincerely.

"No problem, the nurse helped me"

Tegan had the immediate thought that Lindsey was trying to hide her injuries. Tegan looked a bit upset but let it go.

"Did you have something to eat?" Tegan asked.

"Yes, did you?"

"Yeah… Okay…. Can we get out of here? Had enough of this place in the last few days" said Tegan.

"Well, sorry to inconvenience you" said Lindsey.

"Lindsey? What's up with you? You know I didn't mean it like that?"

"I'm sorry Tee… I don't know what they fuck I'm doing" said Lindsey with her head down.

"Hey, it's okay… It's going to be okay" said Tegan and hugged Lindsey tight.

"I love you… I love you so much…. You're everything" said Lindsey with her forehead against Tegan's.

"I love you too… we're going to get through this" whispered Tegan.

"Take me home please"

"You got it… let's go" said Tegan and took Lindsey's hand in hers. "I'm right here okay… right here" she said.

-o-

Tegan and Lindsey managed to dodge the reporters in front of the hospital by leaving through the basement. When they got home Lindsey greeted Sonia and the kids briefly before excusing herself to go take a nap.

"Is she okay?" Sonia asked Tegan.

"I don't know… I hope so" said Tegan deep in thought.

"You guys have been through so much"

"I just don't know how to help her… I feel so helpless"

"Just be there for her sweetie. Give her time"

"Why is life so unfair sometimes Mom?"

"I don't know honey"

"Yeah… anyway, are you okay with the two monkeys for a while? I just want to go check that she's okay"

"We're having a great time. Go, be with your wife"

-o-

Lindsey was lying on her side when Tegan came into the room. Tegan wordlessly lay down behind her and put her arm protectively around Lindsey's waist. Lindsey put her hand on Tegan's.

"Where would I be without you" she whispered.

"You don't have to think about it… because you have me…. All of me… always" whispered Tegan.

"You and me babe"

"Me and you"

-o-

Five days later Lindsey seemed to be feeling a bit better, physically at least. Tegan was busy packing their last few things for the wedding trip.

"I'm glad we're getting away for a while" said Lindsey.

"Me too… looking forward to it. You sure you're up for this?" said Tegan.

"Yeah… wouldn't miss it for the world. May spoil the wedding photos though" laughed Lindsey pointing at her face. Tegan softly touched the fading bruises on Lindsey's face.

"You're so beautiful… still" she said.

"You're too kind, I look hideous" said Lindsey.

"No you don't" whispered Tegan looking into Lindsey's eyes.

Tegan slowly brought her lips to Lindsey's. She kissed her softly at first and then parted her lips with her tongue and kissed harder. She pulled her closer and moved down to her neck. She felt Lindsey's pulse quicken in her neck under her lips. Tegan ran her hands up under Lindsey's t-shirt and softly cupped her breasts in her palms and ran her thumbs over the soft nipples causing to tighten immediately. Lindsey's breathing intensified but her hands remained still on Tegan's hips. Tegan kept exploring with her mouth on Lindsey's exposed neck while slowly and gently running her fingers down Lindsey's belly to the apex between her thighs.

"I want you so much" she whispered. Tegan could feel Lindsey trembling.

"Are you okay?" she asked softly.

"Uh huh" Lindsey grunted.

Tegan started kissing again. The next moment Lindsey pulled away and took three steps backward, panting.

"I'm sorry… I can't" she cried.

"Baby Boo… it's okay, it's okay… come here" said Tegan stepping closer.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry… just give me a minute" said Lindsey with her shaking palm up to Tegan.

"Let me comfort you" said Tegan.

"No… just give me a moment" Lindsey asked again.

"What can I do? Let me help you" cried Tegan.

"I'm sorry sweetie… can I have a cup of tea?" asked Lindsey shakily sitting down on the bed.

"Of course… let me… can I hold you?" said Tegan sounding desperate.

"Baby just give… me… a moment!" said Lindsey strongly.

"Don't push me away Lindsey"

"I'm not pushing you away…. Tegan please, I don't want to fight" said Lindsey in tears.

Tegan sighed.

"I understand… I'm going to go make us some strong English tea. I'll be right back. After that I'm drawing you a nice hot bath"

Lindsey just nodded, still looking down.

-o-

"Hey Teegs, everything okay?" asked Sonia as Tegan passed the living room. Sonia now had her own place in LA but she decided to stay with them a few days to help out with the kids while Lindsey and Tegan came to terms with what had happened.

"Sure Mom" said Tegan and switched on the kettle.

Sonia put her hand on Tegan's back and Tegan let out a large, shuddering sigh.

"Wanna talk?" Sonia asked.

"No… not really" said Tegan.

"Alright… I'm here if you do"

"Thanks mom… and thanks for all your help this week. Don't know what we would have done without you"

"Oh you know how much I love spending time with my grandkids. Really was no effort, only a pleasure"

"You ready for the big wedding trip?" asked Tegan trying to lighten the mood.

"Can't wait! What time are we leaving tomorrow?"

"Um… as early as possible, which may not be very early when we have to pack for twins" laughed Tegan.

"Oh I know the drill" laughed Sonia and squeezed Tegan's shoulder.

Tegan laughed.

"I'm going to turn in now so I can be up at 6 to help you feed the kiddos and get them ready while you pack the car" said Sonia.

"Thanks Mom. I don't know which one is the harder job!" Tegan laughed but looked sad.

"Goodnight sweetie, hang in there okay. I love you" said Sonia and hugged her eldest.

Tegan kept hugging. "I love you too Mom…. So much" said Tegan.

-o-

"Here you go, one large tea" said Tegan and put the cup on the nightstand and subconsciously stepped back until her back was against the wall.

"Thanks baby… sweetie, come here" said Lindsey softly.

Tegan stayed put looking upset.

"Tee please" said Lindsey.

"I don't want to crowd you, I'm sorry if I did. I never want to make you uncomfortable or hurt you" said Tegan.

"Baby… I love you… I'm sorry… I"

"Don't be sorry honey" said Tegan sitting down next to Lindsey.

"I don't know why… It's not you Tegan"

"I know it's not"

A few long minutes passed with Tegan just staring at their linked hands.

"Can we just… be together… just hold me" whispered Lindsey.

"I'd love that" said Tegan.

Lindsey slowly unbuttoned Tegan's shirt and slid it off her shoulders.

"I don't want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable" said Tegan softly.

"You won't… If it's okay with you I don't... uh... I don't feel ready to have sex... Please Baby just give me time... But...I just want to feel your skin next to mine… feel your energy, your heartbeat"

"Of course it's okay with me, anything you need my love, I'm here"

Tegan was nervous…. Lindsey hadn't allowed her to see her naked since the assault. She slowly pulled Lindsey's shirt off and flinched when she saw the large purple bruises on her abdomen and chest.

She let out a shuddering sigh as tears rolled down her cheeks.

"That fucking bastard" she said under her breath.

"Don't…. shhhhh" said Lindsey running her hands through Tegan's hair.

"Lie down" said Tegan and gently pulled off Lindsey's sweatpants when she obliged. More bruises. Tegan felt as if there was a vice grip around her heart. She switched off the bedside lamp to hide her tears and to take away those images but she knew they'd be stuck in her mind forever.

"Don't cry baby" Lindsey whispered. Tegan got up and pulled her pants off before carefully lying down next to Lindsey. She took her in her arms and guided Lindsey's head to her chest.

"You're trembling and your heart is racing like a freight train" said Lindsey.

Tegan didn't answer and continued stroking Lindsey's hair and back. Lindsey gently rubbed Tegan's belly in circles.

"It's over… it's over" she mumbled.

"Yes it is" breathed Tegan.

"This feels so right… this is where I belong. Safe… One with you, forever" whispered Lindsey.

"Always… you have all of me… always" said Tegan and kissed the top of Lindsey's head.

-o-

Kate lay in bed going through a file with wedding details. It wasn't much since it was due to be a very low key event but she wanted to make sure all the outstanding invoices have been settled so they didn't have to worry about a thing during the next few days.

Sara bounced into the room grinning. She jumped onto the bed and grabbed the file out of Kate's hands and threw it on the floor.

"Sara, I was working on that" said Kate pretending to be mad.

"It can wait" said Sara and straddled Kate's hips. She gently took Kate's glasses off and put them on the nightstand.

"Are you excited?" Kate asked.

"I'm close to exploding I'm so excited" said Sara and started tickling Kate. "Are you?"

"Nah" Kate joked and Sara intensified her tickling.

"Okay, alright I give up" gasped Kate through giggles. "I'm so fucking crazy about you, I can't wait to make you my wife"

"That's better" grinned Sara and leaned over to kiss Kate.

"Everything packed?" asked Kate through kisses.

"Uh huh… most of it already there via our assistants" said Sara fondling Kate's breasts.

"I hope those two aren't having a party there tonight" said Kate.

"Oh come on, you were young once. Let them party… as long as there's not one sign of it when we get there" said Sara.

"Amelia's going to walk all over you one day" joked Kate.

"Shut up and kiss me old timer" giggled Sara and pulled her shirt off.

"Oh my heart" joked Kate clenching her chest.

Sara intensified her kisses as she tugged at Kate's shirt.

"Get this fucking thing ooooff"

"Hang on" laughed Kate and pulled the shirt over her head.

"I need you nooow" said Sara, intensity burning in her eyes.

"Easy tiger" laughed Kate and rolled Sara onto her back. She devoured Sara's lips, her neck and moved down to her breasts.

"Hey I wanted to do that first" laughed Sara and rolled Kate back onto the bed.

"I can't wait another second" grinned Kate.

"So…." said Sara through kisses.

"Are you going to change your name to Dr Quin?" giggled Sara.

"Yes, if you're going to change your band name to Tegan and Mrs Morgan" laughed Kate before kissing Sara again with vigour.

"Oh sooomebody is feeling a lot better!" gasped Sara through kisses, her hands eagerly roaming over Kate's toned body.

"I most certainly am, fit, healthy and ready for action" chuckled Kate as Sara briefly inspected the small scars on her abdomen.

"I hope so, don't want you pulling a back muscle or something" winked Sara.

"Oh you think you can make me pull a back muscle? I dare you" breathed Kate kissing Sara's neck.

"A challenge?" laughed Sara.

"Hmmm mmm" grunted Kate.

"I want you waking down the aisle hot stuff… so I'll go easy on you" said Sara with her mouth around Kate's nipple.

"Ahh… you call that easy?" mocked Kate squeezing Sara's ass.

"Uh huh… wait for the wedding night" laughed Sara and kissed Kate's belly.

"Let's elope… tonight" joked Kate.

"You… fucking drive me completely nuts… you know that? I am completely, totally… head over heels for you" said Sara kissing the inside of Kate's thighs.

"I love you Sara Quin! Now hurry up and take me! I'm all yours" said Kate with her arm spread onto the bed. Sara brought her face up to Kate's and took a moment to marvel in this incredible woman. So sexy, so strong, so gentle, so loving, so incredibly open with her emotions. Kate was all hers, and everything in her belonged completely to Kate. An incredible warmth spread all over her.

"I love you, with everything in me... Words are not enough to express how I feel" Sara choked out.

Kate took Sara's face gently in her hands and stared into her eyes before kissing her with every bit of passion in her being.

A/N: A bit of sad and a bit of happy - hope you enjoyed it. Remember to send feedback pleeeeease!