"Ana!" Kate cries out, excitedly. "I don't know what to do."
"What, Kate? What?" I cry back, my enquiring mind wanting to know.
"Your creepy boyfriend's dreamy brother asked me out for Saturday night."
She was talking about Elliot, the brother of Christian Grey, who, for the record, is not creepy. He's just a misunderstood stalker who's into kinky sex.
"Holy crap," I tell her.
From the corner of my eye, I can see the brow of Jose, my best homosexual friend, wrinkle in curiousity.
"Should I go?" Kate continues.
"I wouldn't," I told her. "He'll wine you and dine you and then use any excuse to get you into his bedroom, where he'll tear off your dress and make passionate love to you."
"Oh, Ana! What should I do?"
Jose looks up from the copy of Blueboy he's pretending to read and answers for me.
"Wear an old dress," he says.