For Thanksgiving, Kate and Jose thought they'd leave all their worries and sexual frustrations behind and go camping.
In the middle of the night, Kate woke up and looked towards the sky. She nudged Jose awake and asked him, "What do you see?"
Rubbing his eyes, Jose looked up and said, "I see billions and billions of stars."
"And what does that tell you?" Kate said, nudging him again to keep his eyes open.
"Astronomically speaking," Jose told her, "it tells me there are countless galaxies and potentially billions of planets, at once making me realize how incredibly insignificant we are. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Timewise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow." Jose sat up, proud of himself. "And what does it tell you, Kate?"
Kate turned to her platonic friend and saw what a waste of a perfectly good college education looked like.
"It tells me that somebody stole our tent," she said.