[16/11/18 Edit: working on chapter 10]

Chapter 9 : conflicted feelings

The insides of the shack are even smaller than the barn I share with aqua and of course I wasn't surprised by that. I mean we can tell just by the outside appearance of the tiny building that it would be more cozy than wide inside.

On the opposite, there an another detail that picked my attention as I entered Megumin's place.

Looking to the left and to the right the first thing that hit me is the cleanliness of the area.

There nothing hanging on the ground or even on the bed as there no trace of the poorness emanating from the outside of the shack, the furniture are surely second hand but I can still clearly say that, yes it look like a girl room.

Megumin got some bookshelves filled with magic books lined up perfectly with some engaging title like ''the art of explosion'' or ''the most powerful magic in the world'' all around the place.

Seeing those make me unconsciously smile as the thought ''it's so like her'' briefly invade my mind.

''You can wait here''

Megumin point out the bed as she rapidly enter a small other room that seem to be the ''shower'' she talked about. And as she left me alone, I remember that I've stepped in a dangerous territory called ''girl's room'' where I feel like I'm not supposed to be.

But it's not like something will happen right ? If I'm here that because it's more convenient for me to quickly get my shirt back right ?

And even if I imagine that I wanted to I do anything fishy I would even know how to proceed due to my lack of confidence and experience when it come to relations.

The sound of water splashing on the ground start to be heard, finally interrupting my useless reasoning.

And by assumption I came to think that Megumin is surely using some container since there presumably no courant water here..

''...''

By the way..That red witch is totally naked just two meter away as I imagine her doing her daily washing routine. Obvious to say that I'm not disturbed at all... no of course no.

Yeah nothing will happen.. nothing will happen... she just want to give your shirt back so don't get over conscious about trivial things..

Water sounds stopped after a while while I wasn't daring explore the wilderness of an girl room, instead sitting on the bed, looking around like a cat in a foreign environment.

About ten minutes passed before the door opened, revealing Megumin as the scent of soap fill the room.

She walk slowly, passing in front of me while my eyes are litteraly glued to her.

''Why are you looking at me like that Kazuma.''

Why she said.. That maybe because she only wearing a towel around her chest !

''That because you're half naked idiot !''

Megumin look away, embarrassed as I try to regain my composure without ever restraining myself to ogle at her.

''But..''

''I thought you see me as a child..''

I see.. Yeah that was true some day ago.. but.. things evolded. I cannot consider her as I child..

I mean, not anymore..

So logically before all of this I would have answered yes but as now I only fell silent, just looking deep in her eyes as I stand up from the bed I was sitting.

''I've got that wrong idea about you... maybe.''

Telling the truth, I cannot stand looking at her while doing so.

Megumin surely does not even know how to behave in front of boys.. I don't want her to expose herself to anyone while thinking that us men are insensitive to her charms. She must aknowledge that she is too cute for her own good.

''You shouldn't act this way toward me, like you said it yourself, I'm a lecherous pervert so who know what I would try to do to you if you're in that defenless state.''

I walk slowly toward Megumin putting all my willpower to preserve that fake assured behavior of mine as I stand in front of her.

''..''

She fell into silence, not seeming scared of everything as a huge desire of hugging her flood my entire mind, stopping any other thoughs to interfere with that present moment.

There's no one, just the two of us, I look to the windows behind her figure as I notice that the sky started to be tainted in grey, annoucing that time has come to go back to the barn. But instead I'm here, feeling like I'm living my well earned youth with the most unexpected partner.

God damn Megumin push me away or I dont know how I'll handle the situation from there.

Since I'm way taller than her the half naked crimsom demon raise her slighly glowing eyes toward me.

''What kind of things would you do to me ?''

Megumin eyes dig into my soul, as her word resonate in my entire body, my acting behavior of the men who know everything about women seem futile now as I wasn't expecting that sort of outcome.

Her sentence.. its sounded like an invitation to something more intimate. Or not, maybe that was just me to emphasize the idea. But I don't care anymore at this point.

''Something like that.''

Slightly grabbing her small shoulder with my hand, I kiss her, more fiercely than any other time as Megumin abandoned herself, only hooked to my lips.

There no more curse or anything, I'm kissing this girl and she accept it willingly..This is truly amazing..

But I want more..

I gently push Megumin on her bed and position myself on all four above her as all common reasoning fled up my mind.

''Megumin this is serious''

I warn my girlfriend one last time before allowing myself to get lost in endless fantasy. She is not responding anymore, I dont know even if I would hear her in my actual state anyway.

Oh god..That's too much, way to much for me.

''Mn !''

Megumin let out at small moan as I blow kisses on her neck , slowly moving upward as I meet her wet lips and then moving downward meeting the only barrier to her total nudity.

I don't think there a need to even ask. And so I gently get rid of the towel like If were manipulating a doll.

''..''

I try to not look at what is unfolded in front of me too much, I'm inexperimented and I don't want to lose to much control of myself and do something wrong, so I resume my kissing, exploring various precious parts of her body along my lips tips.

While doing so, Megumin suddenly arch ,gasping while looking at the ceiling with an entranced look, probably surprised by this foreign feeling spreading across those intimate places.

''Kazumaa''

''So-sorry! Did I overdo it?!''

Shit ! I was too hyped ! I can't believe I even licked.. down there..

''Kiss''

Megumin literally lost it, begging for something that I would be glad to give again and again until she'll get satiated. Without any concern, I taste the flavor of her lips once again but this time, our tongues met awkardly after a little bit of surprise and hesitation in reaction to my bold move.

Even if my mouth is taken away I didn't let out of her precious parts as my hands are free to ravage all centimeter of her frail frame once again.

I'm truly afraid of hurting her or doing something not really recommended, truth is the only thing that I do actually is replicate what I saw in various ''websites'' on the net, really trying to focus on her own pleasure.

I want Megumin to remember this day for now on so.. I would like to make her feel good.. even if that would be just a little.

Finally lacking oxygen our mouths got separated as we stare blankly at each other, her hot breath constantly tickling my face up to my ears as her respiration try to regain its normal pacing.

Damn she is to cute way to cute, I wouldn't admit it but I don't even know why she picked me to be the one who'll be here, on top of her, breatless as we implicate ourselves in this sexual act.

Of course Megumin remain ''the crazy explosion girl with a screw loose'' but along the way she became more than that. What I mean by that is, I don't want anyone else to got to see that, to got to touch her as I do, to kiss her like we done. I want her to be mine.

''Kazuma?''

''It's me..''

''Do you love me ?''

Megumin look deep in my eye deeply, defenitively expecting an answer as I immediatly stop what I was doing, not thinking that she'll be that much straight forward.

I guess we never really talk about that, about my real feelings..

''Megumin I think I-''

''I-I cannot believe this...''

I and Megumin quickly turn toward the person who talked as we see the blue haired worthless deity who seem to not catch what going on.

That cannot be..

We got caught doing that ?! how I'm gonna explain this now ?!

Megumin too, don't seem to find any plausible answers or escuses to our little actions as she blankly look toward Aqua.

I quickly get away from my girlfriend as she hide her body with the red blanket of her bed. Aqua still is as dumbfounded as she entered the room clearly have trouble directly watching the scene.

I guess I can understand Aqua's reaction but nonetheless that really a shame that she came at this moment ! I was going to go even further and maybe even finally lose that cursed invisible ''virgin'' label floating above my head !

''Ho-how did you dare break the innocence of Megumin?''

Oh crap she recovered! Maybe Megumin can explain this to aqua ! That would allow me to not be killed by an overangered woman !

Aqua is not useless when it came to fight me.. if only she was the same against the enemy.

This is really a pity.

''He-He jumped on me and he was so determined that I couldn't bring myself to refuse!''

Megumin ! No! You little...!

''Is that so Kazumaa..''

''It's wrong I...''

No word coming out.. I was going to find some random escuses but nothing came to my mind..

''Aqua! If you close your eyes on this I'll give you a ton of money!''

That right there no more greedy woman in town than Aqua! I'm so intelligent !

''Really?!''

Wow... she took the bait... and that easily on top of that.. My opinion of her was soo spot on !

''Wait! Wait! I mean no! ''

But aqua quickly get back on those word, furiously rejecting my offer.

Tss.. I guess that finally wont be enough this time. How I'll deal with that now?

Apart the punishement she would give me, the worthless deity could reveal this imformations about me to a lot of person.

And I don't know if being the boyfriend of the crazygirl is good for my reputation..

I don't want to be tagged as a lolicon all my life! Being a NEET was enough ! Please ! I have enough problem living right now !

''..''

Thinking about it, maybe I'm one of them.. I mean I was ready to go further with her, I was attracted to her, I saw her as a woman countless time and now I cannot revert to the time when Megumin was just like a cute troublesome child to me, right now when I see her I cannot help myself to want to come closer.

And about that question Megumin asked before aqua barged in, what would have be my answer if no one disturbed us?

''…''

I don't know, our relation is different from eveything I encountered until now... ''love'' is still in the unknow territory for me.

Or maybe I already know the answer.. but that too late to think about it since actually my life is in danger ! Even me I cannot bring my ''gender equality'' thing here ! I cannot fight back ! Because It was my fault in the first place !

If only Megumin wouldn't have show herself half nude I wouldn't have try that bold move that does not look like something I would do usually !

''..''

I really became a lolicon... Whatever it really mean..

''Time has come kazuma..''

Tonight won't be good for me ..Aqua look dreadful, maybe even more threatening than an angered Megumin...

''I need to purify you from your sin !''

What the hell is she casting?!That look way different than beauty of nature !

I need to think quick if I don't want to have another scars on my body !

''Oh god A giant toad !''

''Kyah ?!W-where?!''

That worthless deity is so dumb ! This is my chance to escape ! While she looked away I run past her, getting out of the house and running at full strengh toward a random direction, shiftly sneaking between house and garden while I hear chasing footstep noises getting distant.

''Come back you shut in NEET!I need to cure your disease !''

I hear aqua infuriated voice some meter away from my position as she seem to not have registered the path I borrowed and so I stop in my track, sitting on a bench hidden in some shady narrow street probably looking like a criminal on the run.

''Tss how can my life suck more than when I was enclosed in my room all day.''

I am in a medieval fantasy world, I'm having skill, power, cool abilities and somehow I find a way to screw everything up.

Aqua is useless but she is still a deity, and having a angered deity against you is no good in any shape or form.

And said that I was complaining about living in the barn.. where do I go now ? I cannot step in my only living place since Aqua live here too..

Maybe she will calm down somehow..who know ?

If only that idiot Megumin would have phrased it otherway ! If she wasn't consenting she would have stop me anytime !

I even believe that she potentially even lure me to assault her ! Why would she present herself nude to me otherwise !?

''…''

Maybe..

I remember seeing her put a spare set of cloth on something that look like a rudimentary desk..

Shit..

Megumin could've just forgot to bring it with her and so she was problably obliged to get out to take it..

Either I'm a idiot or I'm just imagining things..

That does not explain how she acted when we were on the bed though.

''Gah! I should stop worrying about meaningless stuffs like that!''

As I verbally voice my complaints I couldn't stop myself to puch the back facade of a nearby house, without missing to hurt my own hand in the process.

Thinking about it I've finally got what I asked for.. No one to bother me, I'm free to restart a party whenever I want, plus I got that explosive overpowered skill now, allowing me to take care of more tricky quests.

Or maybe I overthinking, if I go back to the guild tomorrow like nothing happened probably Aqua would have forgive me ..

I dont know, for now I should find a place to sleep, I got money so I can probably afford a night somewhere here.