This work is experimental. Just had some thoughts about how The Pokemon Company International could react to Genshin Impact, and asked myself: "Why not?!".
I'm not new to writing fanfiction, but this is my first story that's written in English. If all goes well I'll continue this fic further. The first two chapters are mostly informational. The actual adventure will start in the third.
Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon or Genshin Impact! All characters are completely fictional!
Hope you like this strange story format!
Chapter 1. Intro 1
"Hi everyone, I'm Tedd and today I'll be streaming you the latest Pokemon Mystery Dungeon game – Visitors From Afar", said a slightly pudgy twenty years old guy, when the video finally started.
"Damn YouTubes double commercials!"
"Yeah yeah, I know." Tedd continues and his face is promptly replaced with in-game footage: different pokemon run, swim, climb surfaces and even fly in the sky. "Half o' the internet is calling it nothing but an overpriced Genshin Impact clone and a total disgrace. The other half just dismiss' everything that's not part of the core series."
"And both opinions are totally justified!", I thought, angrily pouring myself some tea. "Only core games really matter! And 80$ for a spin-off game that contains only a Monstadt knock-off? With other regions added through DLCs, that cost 30$ each? Preposterous! Genshin gave us all of that for free!"
I paused the video and briefly considered closing YouTube and opening GI. The games story ended back in 2024, but players could still complete regularly updated quests. Tedious, but fun and a bit nostalgic…
"Tempting, but I'll pass. Let's see what this mystery dungeon game is really about. Nintendo used the Tree of Beginning on the advertisement posters… Looks like an alternative for Dvalins Lair... Always wanted that place as an in-game location…"
I continued the video: "..., doesn't have the gacha mechanic and other in-game purchases. Even the clothes are free and obtainable through the story! So, imo, the price is totally justified…"
"Meh, it could be free to play with micropayments and available for non-Nintendo platforms. But noooooo, it has to be a Switch-exclusive!" I bitterly downed the remains of my tea and grabbed some chips. Thanks to currency rates, consoles in my country are too expensive for common workers. "Well, at least there's no gacha! That's definitely a plus!"
"... not a clone. It's rather INSPIRED by Genshin. Pokemon in this version of Mystery Dungeon are not rated with stars and you obtain them through recruitment. Your party follows you around instead of remaining somewhere off-screen and there are no elemental reactions beyond basic physics. Like, water extinguishes fires but vapor doesn't do additional damage!"
"How is that a good thing, dimwit?! We've asked for intertype reactions between attacks for litteral f**king years! Why is TPCi so old school? Reactions are almost a "must have" nowadays!" Boiling with anger I looked in the comment section. A similar question already got more than seven hundred likes.
Tedd, after vocalising one of polite versions of that trending question, merely shrugged: "I don't know what they're thinking. Maybe they did that intentionally, so PMD doesn't look like a clone. Personally, I think that's a good thing. So many games have that feature… It's a bit too mainstream for my liking… And I kinda like old franchises that stick with there trademark mechanics while adding modern paraphernalia..."
"S #k my d*#k, you ass-licking moron!" my sudden furious shout was so loud, the cat scrambled from the room. "The pokemon franchise is stagnating for years and venal streamers like you spout praise to every their fart!"
"Okay, now that we covered why this game isn't a clone and why it costs so high, lets actually start it", with that Tedd finally stopped the looping in-game footage and opened a menu. "For this stream I created a completely new account. Ursa777 is my nickname. After my party experience reaches level 7 feel free to try and find me in the game – the co-op is basically the same as in Genshin…"
I snorted, remembering some other trashy advertisements, where the streamer suggests we find him in the game.
"First all of… this PMD game has eighteen starters. Some of them are from the core series, like cyndaquil, oshawott, grookey and pikachu. But the rest, unlike what the leaks told us, are completely new…"
"Hmm… interesting", I thought, looking up the displayed list. "Some of the choices are rather strange, but still promising…"
"This one is my favourite. Munchlax is a very fine tank. Slow as a snail, but bulky and packs quite a punch. His standard moves are: Pound as a basic physical attack, Slam as a charged attack, Protect as the "elemental" skill and Swallow as the "burst"... Yeah, they're not called that way, but the analogue fits…
While Tedd described Munchlax' skills, he simultaneously showed footage of him using them in a small side-window. And the baby snorlax did look effective: place him in front of the party, activate Protect, shift to another pokemon and fire ranged attacks from behind. The bear cub soaked up all of the damage, recieved some after the barrier expired, dealt some vicious Slams to close by enemies, and promptly healed himself by munching berries.
"Before you ask, no, he has his own supply of berries and doesn't touch yours. And Snorlax is AWESOME. He's almost unkillable, has access to good moves like Mega Punch, Body Slam, Heavy Slam, High Horsepower, Hammer Arm, Belch and Giga Impact, and the only downfall is the self induces sleep caused by Rest. But that's a relatively small problem because of Snorlax' huge body – he's basically an enormous anvil for your hammer…"
And the footage showed just that: spam Protect every thirty seconds, deliver heavy Mega Punches or crush enemies with a Body Slam, then heal yourself by using Rest after another Protect. Snorlax slept for a whole minute and received loads of damage, but you had time to prepare a massive assault.
"Hmm, I hope there is a counter to that strategy. Maybe someone with Infiltrator… Espurr and Meowstic have that ability, if I remember correctly", as if reading my mind Tedd highlighted the psychic cat starter.
"Aaand, if you ever meet a wild Snorlax, although that's very unlikely, this little kitty has the perfect ability to ignore all barriers! Espurr is another favourite of mine. It's basically a psychic Diona with Confusion instead of arrows and Psybeam as a charged one. It lacks the healing, but the "elemental" move, Charm, is perfect for supporting your squishy early game party members. And Future Sight is almost a one hit K.O. move! It's so powerful that you wouldn't believe it!
"An Espurr with Future Sight?! Is it buffed beyond adding powerful moves in the moveset?" I quickly checked the comments and yes, someone did ask that. The answer was also right there. "Hmm, Espurr isn't buffed but Meowstic has a 10 point buff to each stat except for HP and Attack. Not bad…"
"Meowstic isn't really different. Even before evolution you get access to barriers, and after that the only thing you need is to replace Confusion with Extrasensory or Psychic and Psybeam with Psyshock. Role Play, Quick Guard and Misty Terrain aren't that useful, imo."
I rolled my eyes, but refrained from comments. He wasn't wrong about those moves being less useful than Charm or the barriers. After all they needed special conditions to work.
"My next favourite is this little doggo close combat specialist. And Riolu is a surprisingly tricky fighter. His basic move is Quick Attack that makes him look like Xiangling with her spear. It strikes very frequently, but the damage isn't very high, so I prefer to use his charged move – Counter. Yep, just like Bei Dou but with Aura instead of lightning! And that's not all of what was added to the mix – his "elemental" move is Force Palm that acts exactly like Travelers Palm Vortex!
"Eh? Triple knock-off? Laaaame!" I exasperatedly poured myself another cup. Riolu was always one of my favourites and I was a little sad that he turned out this way. Though, I had to admit – the moves suited him well...
"The "burst" move is the most interesting and tricky part of this starter", continued Tedd after sipping his own drink. "It's Reversal! So, basically, you need to fight with very low health to deal maximum damage. That's challenging as hell and you don't want to know how frequently I died while trying to utilize his full potential!"
I actually laughed like a madman at that. That was such a troll move from Spike-Chunsoft! Take everyone's favourite little doggo-furry and make him a triple Genshin knock-off that dies and dies and dies.
"Thank God that Lucario isn't that way" said Tedd before I vocalised the obvious question. "His basic move is Bullet Punch, charged is Bone Rush, "elemental" – Aura Sphere and Close Combat as a "burst". That makes him Powerful as the god Anubis himself.
I watch with rapt attention how easily Lucario dispatched his foes in the game: rapid strikes with shiny fists, crushing blows with an eatherial bone, glowing wrecking balls made out of Aura energy, and a literal mortal combat FATALITY that obliterates almost any enemy.
"Yep, there's a reason Riolu is one the most popular starters. Lucario is just damn god-tier! Imo, one of top three available pokemon in the game…"
"Hmm, die HARD and become a f #king GOD. Meme material on a silver platter…" I made myself a mental memo to actually make that meme later. Or check if someone already made it…
"The next pokemon on my list is Rookidee! It's not really powerful, or fast, or bulky. But it can evade all short-range attacks by flying over the battlefield and deal damage like a dive bomber! It's basic move is Peck, charged – Fury Attack, Hone Claws as "elemental" and Drill Peck for "burst".
"Hmm, so something with long ranged attacks or counter-attacks could easily take him out? That's pretty lame…", and for once Tedd agreed with me.
"Yep, there are a couple of other flyers that are way better than Rookidee. Personally, I prefer Swablu. It's basically the same, but with area of effect attacks like Disarming Voice and Hyper Voice, and Sing as the "elemental". Altaria uses Dragon Breath, Safeguard and Hurricane. They don't need to dive down to deal damage."
"Then why is Rookidee fourth on your list?"
"But Corvinight has Pressure and an awesome type combo. The foes quickly spend all of their energy and die struggling. And you can use a "burst" Sky Attacks after slashing with Steel Wing a few times. That's very useful if you encounter something really tough and powerful. Compared to the other available birds that's a very good pokemon."
"That doesn't explain why it's fourth place… Is this list completely subjective? Meh…"
"And our next starter is no other but Axew! He's almost as popular as Riolu. A powerful pokemon right from the start. Scratch as the basic, Dragon Claw as charged, Crunch as "elemental" and a severely buffed Dragon Dance for "burst". Haxorus is god-tier too: Slash, Dual Chop, Outrage and Dragon Dance... though I prefer replacing it with Guillotine."
Tedd suddenly made a dramatic pause, like letting his watchers to fully digest his words. I, for my part, rolled my eyes again, unamused by this stupidity… And was very surprised, when the streamer continued with s shout:
"IT'S A TRAP! Just don't! I repeat, DON'T CHOOSE AXEW! You'll pull all of your hair out trying to evolve him! It's insane! All of the needed resources are super rare! You'll become a slave to that sole goal!"
And suddenly I was laughing my ass off. Again. "That's. Pure. Gold! Give access to a powerful dragon that's normally supposed to be rare as f #k! And make his ascension hellishly arduous! Brilliant!"
Tedd, meanwhile, was still raving. Then he read a citation from the in-game mailbox: "...Sorry for our innocent prank, dear player. Please accept this Eevee as a compensation for your troubles."
"A free eevee?! Is he serious? That's a good reason to actually choose Axew!" I said aloud, now completely confused. "Maybe there's a hidden downside? Or is he just stupid?!"
"You think I'm nuts, yeah? Eevee is versatile and easy to evolve… Yeah, that's right… like one hundred percent right… But I left out one little detail… You have to actually evolve your Axew to get that message… Yep, it's total madness and you can't even complain! The game warns you at the start that dragons ascend harder than everyone else. You just don't comprehend exactly HOW HARD it is!"
"Ugh… That's kinda stupid. How many players get too frustrated and stop playing altogether 'cause it's too hard to evolve their main pokemon?" I looked at the footage with Axew. It was constantly slashing, crunching and dancing, completely obliterating every enemy. Even the big and powerful ones. "Maybe he's just THAT good and people don't really sweat about evolving him?"
"Phew… I'm calm. I'm calm! Let's continue to the next pokemon on my list. Aaaand, it's Duskull! The only ghost, that you can play early in the game. And that's a bit sad, 'cause their and wall transparency is super useful. You can easily scout the area and collect loot without worrying about mobs. Just dive in a wall whenever they see you. Only the guarded and hidden treasure chests give you a challenge."
"Duskull? Meh… Why isn't it Misdreavus, Shuppet, Yamask or Sinistea? Either of those would be a better ghost starter!"
"His moves are Astonish, Shadow Sneak, Disable and Curse. I recommend spamming the charged attack and the "elemental". The "burst" is actually very powerful: it targets a wide circular area and all affected foes die in literal seconds. The only downside of this strategy is that Duskull has minuscule HP and speed. It's heavily reliant on support party members with barriers or healing."
"Why am I not surprised?" I said sarcastically, opening another pack of chips.
"Dusclops isn't really better despite the massive increase in bulk, but Dusknoir is actually pretty cool. He has a great Attack stat and access to different Punches as a basic move, Hex as a charged, "elemental" Confuse Ray and the same Curse "burst"."
I had to agree with that. The footage showed a pretty solid fighter. A bit slow, but extremely bulky and strong. Typical tank and damage dealer, that hands out status conditions like paralyzed and burned, then smashes them with a superpowered Hex and finishes them off with Curse.
"Hmm, a weak underdog that suddenly bites really hard…"
"Duskull is the last starter that I personally tried in the pre-release beta for the press. After the game was released, I got lots of help from my girlfriend and close friends. You can see their names in the description. Each of them picked a starter, ascended them to the final stages, and sent me footage. Thanks guys! I couldn't have done this video so fast without your help!"
"So that's how he prepared this thorough review about eighteen pokemon lines in just a few days after the release? Clever… If only you weren't so dull and boring" I briefly considered closing the stream, but decided against that.
"Okay, let's continue with the classic grass/fire/water starters!" continued Tedd, as dull as always. "And the grass starter IS… Grookey! His moves are: Branch Poke, Razor Leaf, Uproar and Nature Power. The first one is pretty basic", the streamer smirked to his own dumb pun. "Razor Leaf is a standard charged ranged attack, but with a gimmick – it's trajectory is curved and let's you hit foes even behind obstacles. And you can upgrade it to Magical Leaf with a Technical Machine. After that it will never miss!"
"Hmm, so moves can be replaced with TMs. Why didn't he say that earlier? How many options he didn't mention with the previous starters? This review already doesn't look as thorough as advertised..."
"Uproar here also works a little differently: it's an area of effect sound attack that randomly hits one enemy every three seconds and lasts ten. And, just like in core pokemon games, it's impossible to sleep under all that racket. Super useful and powerful, there is an "irritating downside" – while uproaring Grookey is unable to use his basic and charged moves. You can't move him at all!"
"Hah! Another meme!" I wasn't sure the English pokecommunity would understand it, but a rioting chimp is a popular meme in my homeland. There was even an adaptation with Grookey. "Hmm, maybe I can modify it a bit. RIOT instead of BUND…Would be a fine gif..."
Tedd, meanwhile, continued: "... only thing available is the "burst" – Nature Power. The move is almost completely the same: different effects depending on your environment. In the Rota region, that was a copy of Monstadt even when Genshin Impact didn't exist, it's usually anything but Ice Beam and Frost Breath. Though, you can find snow and cold caves in the Tree of Beginning."
This time the footage showed big glowing energy balls and beams of fire, ice and lightning, rising torrents of water and massive mud bombs, explosions of dirt and gigantic gems, thunderbolts and blasts of moonlight. All of them were powerful and, unlike core game analogues, targeted a wide area instead of single opponents.
"Rillaboom has the same "burst", but the other moves are different. Drum Beating as the basic… yes, it makes you completely immobile. Wood Hammer as the charged, that, fortunately, doesn't have recoil damage. And Uproar is replaced with Boomburst…"
"Ugh? Another move that makes you a sitting duck? Just… Why?!" After seeing the footage I was pretty sure almost no one would knowingly choose Grookey. Grass types are generally too vulnerable to others and a pokemon that is forced to stay in place under hostile fire… That's just DUMB!
Though, to be honest, those dancing roots, controlled by the drum beats, were pretty good with keeping foes at a distance. Only long-ranged elemental attacks can reach him and deal damage. Unfortunately, those are very common...
"And our next starter is Charmander! The most popular pokemon after Pikachu! Seriously, polls show that this little not-dragon is picked by thirty three percent of players. Fourty five choose the electric mouse and only twenty two are spread between the rest, with almost half of them divided between Axew and Riolu. That's a bit sick, right?!"
"It is." I agreed "Pikachu is nothing special, even buffed with additional stats. Charizard is similarly overhyped, but at least he's powerful enough and is not a glass cannon, like Raichu… Hmm, can you even evolve Pikachu in this game? Or is he locked, like in Let's Go?"
"Okay, Charmanders moves are Scratch, Metal Claw, Fire Spin and Heat Wave. The first two are pretty simple: slash, slash and slash again! Fire Spin here is actually pretty powerful. It looks like Travelers twister combined with Xianglings Gouba and functions similarly – the foe is trapped for three to five second. Sadly, only one enemy is affected, because the damage is MASSIVE! Compared to that vortex of destruction, the "burst", Heat Wave looks quite underwhelming – it's just that, a circular area of effect fire attack. Yes, it's strong and deals damage to multiple opponents, but ninety five base power is nothing compared to thirty five multiplied by three, four or five."
"And does the fire spin trap heavy or shielded enemies? The inability to do that was a major downside of Travelers twister…"
"Though, I'm not really fair to Heat Wave. It has a ten percent chance of burning. And grass, caught on fire, has a thirty percent chance for every two seconds you stand on it. And Rota has LOTS of that… That's why the most popular Charizard build is Air Slash/Flamethrower/Fire Spin/Flare Blitz. With the ability to fly our prideful not-dragon becomes absolutely terrifying!"
"F #k, that's one fine incinerator", I muttered, watching the footage. Charizard flew over a group of enemies and rained torrents of flames on their heads, instantly igniting the battlefield. Fire Spin made it look utterly hellish.
Air Slash and Flare Blitz weren't even needed. The enemies on the ground were killed in mere seconds. Only ground, rock, water, flying and Aarondragon types could withstand these conditions and even fight back with ranged attacks or joining Charizard in the sky. Though, the last ones were quickly grounded after getting hit by a flamethrower.
"As you can see, Air Slash and Flare Blitz aren't really needed. Though, that's not really true. Sometimes Charizard does receive enough damage to lose flight and then you have two options: if your "burst" isn't ready then Air Slash can help you scatter the mobs and take off again; if Flare Blitz is available, then you can use it to smash through the mobs and instantly take off. Yep, just like a plane..."
"Huh, Flare Blitz looks like Dilucs burst… Another knock-off!" I quietly chuckled, not really upset about the similarity. "Well, at least here you have to pay only 80$ for Diluc and you're guaranteed to get him!" I made another memo to make a meme about that… And maybe about the plane part too...
"Compared to Charmander and Charizard our next starter doesn't look very special", Tedd finally displayed the list again and highlighted one of the names. "Froakie moves only by hopping around and that looks a bit disconcerting in melee. But that's because he's not intended to be an active close quarters fighter!"
The footage showed a Froakie that used his basic move, Quick Attack, only for a few rapid strikes when it was absolutely necessary. Otherwise he kept its distance with fast hops and utilized the charged move – Water Pulse. If, for some reason, you couldn't evade, then he could use the "elemental" – Double Team, to create two illusory copies of himself right beside him. It gave a sixty six percent chance that the foe would miss.
"...the "burst"! It's Bubble Beam – a thin cone of foam that's active for a few seconds and hits pretty far. It even lets you cover a wider area by moving the cursor. As a bonus the ground becomes slippery and your enemies move a bit slower so that they don't fall. Pretty neat, yeah?"
"Hmm, are stealth missions common in this game? If yes, this guy could be pretty useful… Climbing to high places, hopping from one dark corner to another… Yep, little ninja apprentice detected!"
Tedd sipped some water and continued: "Greninja is built similarly, except that the melee move, Night Slash, is now the charged attack. Water Shuriken is the basic and it lets you shoot up to five times in two seconds…"
"Whoa! That's fast… Oh, he uses both hands…" The footage showed a classic western duel (with the music): Greninja is standing upright with both hands on hips; a shooting mob finally spots him and takes a similar pose; after a mere second they both start shooting...
"As you can see, he shoots two shurikens almost simultaneously. Repeats. Finishes the combo with a fifth one, and instantly crouches lower so that the enemies miss. If you feel cornered and want to quickly escape, then there are four options. One of them you already know – melee with Night Slash. The second is the "burst". It's Surf – the tide just sweeps everyone off the ground and takes them a few meters back. But that affects your party too, so it's better to use the "elemental"..."
"Huh, switching jutsu?" The footage showed Greninja using Substitute: he teleported to a place out of sight and left a decoy behind. The mobs continued their onslaught without even realising the substitution, and that gave you the opportunity to shoot them from behind.
"I'm told that with the right build our cowboy/ninja frog is capable of doing massive damage by continuously spamming critical hits. Yeah, he becomes a glass cannon, but he's not intended to take damage anyway. So that's not a biggie…"
"Charizard is still way more powerful than both Greninja and Rillaboom. Why aren't you mentioning that? And why aren't you mentioning other builds? Greninjas can learn so many moves, but you're showing only the standard one. Maybe he's better as a melee fighter? Or a special attacker?!"
I looked in the comments section and quickly found similar questions… But no answers… Tedd ignored them completely, probably not wanting to admit that his friends didn't provide information about different builds…
"And our ninth starter is Pikachu! Finally! Let's see how the most popular pokemon fairs in this version of Mystery Dungeon. The moves are pretty standard: Thunder Shock as the basic attack; Electro Ball as the charged; Thunder Wave as the "elemental"; and Discharge as the "burst". The stats aren't buffed and it's able to evolve…"
"Hmm, not bad", I thought, watching the footage. Pikachu was a fast and powerful fighter. All of his moves, except for Electro Ball, had a ten percent chance of paralyzing.
Thunder Wave looked like a spark that collided with an enemy and was guaranteed to affect him. After that it created a short circular wave that could paralyze others with a severely lower chance.
Discharge rained lightning from above like a miniature thunderstorm. As a "burst" it quickly gained energy and you could use it multiple times in one fight. The only downside was friendly fire.
"Pretty good, eh?" asked Tedd with a light smirk. "Now let's see Raichu. Or Raichu's?! Yep, Pikachu evolves into the alolan variant if you travel to a special hidden island. Usually it's always cloudy, but after completing a relatively small quest it becomes a sunny paradise."
"..." I quietly poured myself some tea, trying to ignore thoughts about a specific island in Genshin Impact, and how the gamedev's could be more imaginative.
"Alolan Raichu's moves are: Psychic, Thunderbolt, Thunder Wave and Thunder. The regular variant is completely the same, but with Thunder Punch as the basic attack, and he isn't capable of flight…"
"Then the alolan variant is definitely better. A flying glass cannon is always better than a ground bound one... Oh, does this flight make him immune to Earthquake and others? Or is he still vulnerable, like Magnemites line in the core games?"
I was about to check the comments, but in the end that wasn't needed. The footage showed how a levitating Raichu completely ignored a Gravelers Magnitude…
"Yeah, that was finally fixed. Thank you, Spike-Chunsoft! Pokemon in this game can have multiple abilities. Just like genshin characters. 'Cause of that Raichu here has Static, Lightning Rod, Surge Surfer AND Levitate, instead of only one of them. Though, sadly, you have to unlocked them first. The alolan's Levitate will be available automatically after evolving only if you previously had Lightning Rod."
"Wow. That's pretty generous", I was already contemplating ability combinations certain starters had. Though, some of them had to be changed. Like, Lucario's Steadfast and Inner Focus contradicted each other. "Hmm, if he was given Iron Fist or Adaptability instead…"
"... Now that we're done with Raichu… And half of the starter roster… I'm gonna take a quick pause for… reasons... Please wait a few minutes and I'll be back!"
"Ugh. And I'll continue watching later… Or not…"