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Word Count: 1498
An Improvement
Learning to be a ghost wasn't something Steve thought he'd ever have to do. Listening to Peggy's voice as he watched the ocean near, he'd thought that was the end. He'd find out what came next.
He certainly hadn't expected to still be… there.
Even if nobody could see him.
It was harder that one would think, though he didn't actually know what people thought about ghosts because he'd never thought about it himself. He'd thought about heaven, and being reunited with his mum and Bucky, and…
He hadn't thought that he'd be forced to watch people mourn for him, to start moving on with their lives.
Peggy met a new partner and remarried. Howard got married and had a kid. The Howlies got on with their own lives—thought Steve was proud to see that they kept in touch and met up together all the time.
He was also touched that their first drink was always dedicated to him and Buck.
Watching Peggy was his main concern at first—even if he did feel a little bit like a creeper doing it. She took his loss hard, especially for the first few months, and it hurt him to not be able to comfort her when she cried into her pillow every night.
He wanted to reach out to her, but the only time he did, it made her cringe away, a full body shudder practically shaking the bed, and it felt gross to him.
He quickly learnt to avoid people after that.
Animals, he found out, could see him, or at least sense his presence. That was interesting, he supposed, but of little help to him since animals also couldn't communicate with people.
When Peggy began moving on with her life, Steve shifted his focus a little. He still checked in on her from time to time, but it was difficult for a while, to see her happy with someone else.
He didn't want to be selfish, but hey, apparently ghost's had feelings too.
He turned his attention instead to the Howlies, and to Howard, who seemed to have taken his death the hardest. A little odd, he supposed, given their fairly limited contact, but they'd been friends.
Steve supposed there were weirder things happening in the world. And at least Howard was looking for him. Maybe if they found his body, he'd be able to… do whatever it was that people usually did when they died.
It was the only hope he had.
…
Tony Stark was precious, Steve decided. He stood by the baby's copper coloured cot, grinning as the little boy raised chubby fists in the air as though trying to catch the tiny particles in his hands.
So taken by the boy, Steve didn't really move far from his side after his birth, choosing to spend his time watching over him instead of wandering around.
As Tony grew into the smartest child Steve had ever known, he found himself confronted with a rather uncomfortable truth.
Howard Stark wasn't a good father.
The man had changed since the war; he drank more, his temper was shorter, and he just… wasn't the Howard Steve remembered.
And a lot of that temper was taken out on Tony.
Steve could only watch on, wishing with all his might that he was corporeal enough to punch Howard straight in the jaw.
As Tony lay in his bed, crying—again—while Howard went back to his board of places he'd looked for Steve, Steve shouted himself hoarse at the man.
"You don't want to save me," he screamed. "You're just using me as an excuse!"
Of course it didn't do anything. Howard couldn't hear him.
Steve had never hated being a ghost so much as he did in that moment.
…
Steve watched Tony grow up. He watched him skip years in school, he watched him be bullied by the older kids who hated that a younger one was so much smarter than they were. He watched the unadvised dalliance with Tiberius Stone, and he watched Tony cope with the deaths of Howard and Maria, and later, Jarvis.
(When Tony got so emotional that he broke the little robot he was working on, Steve tried to hug him. While Tony didn't shiver the way Peggy had, he didn't seem comforted.)
He watched DUM-E come into creation, smiling proudly when tears fell from Tony's eyes as DUM-E beeped cheerfully. U and Butterfingers followed and later, J.A.R.V.I.S.
Steve cringed when Tony let himself fall into the playboy lifestyle, even when Steve knew he didn't enjoy it. He kept to himself during the nights Tony spent entertaining, unwilling to watch Tony search for a high he'd never reach until he let himself feel something.
And then Afghanistan happened, and Steve felt every scream and cry Tony made like it was pain on his own body. Days and days and days, and even Steve lost hope of Tony being found.
Except then he didn't need to be found, because he found his own way out in a silver suit of armour that blew Steve's mind.
…
And then Tony nearly died. Again.
…
A tugging on Steve had him pulled away from Tony. Tony hadn't been doing anything particularly exciting, but Steve was enjoying the healthy glow to his cheeks. It had been too long since he'd seen his Tony in good health.
And now he was being pulled away.
Steve didn't fight the sensation, curious despite his wish to stay with Tony as to what this new thing could be.
Was he about to find out where people went when they died?
The thought saddened him a little. He wanted to wait for Tony, to greet him when he died, and tell him that even though he didn't know Steve, Steve had loved him for all his life.
Except, there was blackness, and then Steve was waking up in his body, and what the fuck was going on here? He hadn't felt fear in so long, it felt foreign to him as he looked around.
The room he woke up in was… odd. Old timey, and Steve didn't think he'd travelled back in time, because his body hadn't been found. Tony would have heard about it, given it was still his money that was funding the searches, even if he hadn't gone on them himself the way Howard had.
Steve left, the only thing on his mind that he had to get to Tony. He had to check on him, make sure he was okay.
He was stopped by a man in a long black leather coat, and an eyepatch. Nick Fury. Steve recognised him from when the man visited Tony in Malibu.
"Tony Stark," Steve said, when Nick tried to speak to him.
"I'm sorry?" Nick asked, eyebrow raising.
"I want to see Tony Stark," Steve replied, a demand in his tone. "Now."
…
"I hear you were asking for me," a voice said from the doorway, and Steve looked up from where he'd been sitting with his head in his hands, to see the only person he wanted.
Tony was leaning against the doorframe, his indigo suit—the one he wore when he wanted to make a good impression, Steve noticed, a little amused—clinging to him as though he'd been poured into it, and Steve just wanted.
He couldn't help himself, and he crossed the room in three large steps, wrapping his arms around Tony tightly.
"Woah," Tony muttered, though Steve noticed he leant into the touch. His Tony had always been a little touch starved. "Wanna explain what's going on here, Cap?"
Not anymore. Steve would make sure of it.
"I've been with you your whole life," Steve said, as he stepped back. "I was… a ghost, I guess. And I… kinda just… stuck with you after you were born until I got pulled back into my body."
"Holy shit," Tony muttered. "There's no coming back from this. How the hell do I make a good first impression when—"
"Tony. I love you. I've loved you for years."
Tony blinked at him. "You… really?"
"Really."
"Huh. Dad never said you were—"
"The less we talk about Howard the better," Steve said darkly, scowling at the wall.
"Oh. Damn, you really were with me. Jesus."
"I know this must be weird for you," Steve said, as he stepped back. "But… please don't make me stay here. I'll stay out of your way, I just—"
"Oh, hell no," Tony muttered. "You're coming to the tower with me. I was already thinking of asking but… well. This is easier. Weird. But easier. Come on, let's get out of here, S.H.I.E.L.D buildings make me itch."
Steve snorted but followed Tony from the room. He was happy now, and back where he belonged, with Tony in his sights.
Whatever happened next would be fine. As long as he had Tony… and hey, he could touch now.
Definitely an improvement.
Written For:
Elizabeth's Empire: 7. Ghost!AU
Lizzy's Loft: 15. Ghost!AU
Scamander's Case: 22. Supernatural
Film Festival: 11. Breaking something
Lyric Alley: You don't want to save me
Pumpkin Carving: 7. Presence
Hot Air Balloons: 13. Indigo
Fortune Telling: Sun Line: 9. Emotional
Trick Or Treating: House 4: 6. Fruit: Copper
Haunted House: 18. Fear
Leaf Picking: Yellow 9. "There's no coming back from this."
Spooky Playlist: 7. Ghost!AU
Stickers: Peruvian Vipertooth: Copper