Chapter 2: everything keeps us apart

The truth is hard for Tsuna to accept, but Yamamoto doesn't push it. He acts as he always has, gently pulls Tsuna along when he becomes too lost in his own head, reaffirms his own truths and not the ones Tsuna's anxiety makes up.

Slowly, Tsuna starts to become accustomed to his place at Yamamoto's side. He goes to baseball games sometimes – only if Kyouko or Nana comes with him – and it's fun, watching Yamamoto enjoy himself on the field. He's a different person when he's pitching, focused in a way he usually isn't. He almost seems untouchable, leading the team to countless victories despite only being a second year.

Sometimes Yamamoto feels so far away in those moments, but his smile is always so wide afterward, when he comes to meet them after a victory smelling of dirt and sweat and sweeps Tsuna into a hug too warm to really enjoy in the summer heat. But Tsuna doesn't protest and always waits for Yamamoto to pull away first, becoming slightly less conscious of the eyes on them as time goes on.

And it seems like there are always eyes on them at baseball games, whether it be Yamamoto's teammates as they struggle with the reality in front of them, or the parents of those teammates who can't seem to resist good gossip.

"Takeshi-kun!" An older alpha woman is the first to approach them after Tsuna starts showing up at the baseball field. Tsuna doesn't know who she is or why she's interested; Yamamoto regards her with a distant politeness that Tsuna rarely sees on him, so he figures this kind of nosiness isn't an odd occurrence. "You've been bringing this boy around a lot lately. Aren't you going to introduce him?"

Tsuna wants to cower under her stare, but Yamamoto's arm only tightens around his shoulders. When the omega glances up at him, Yamamoto's detached look has morphed into one of such blatant fondness that even the older alpha blinks in surprise.

"This is my boyfriend, Tsuna," Yamamoto says excitedly, and Tsuna feels warm all over.

It isn't all rainbows and sunshine, no matter how much Yamamoto likes to pretend. Tsuna doesn't think he means anything by refusing to talk about the troubling things surrounding their relationship: the baseball team's persistent confusion, their classmates' prolonged stares, the lack of any meaningful communication between them since Tsuna is too nervous to really open up about anything.

Yamamoto takes everything in stride, and while that's one of the things Tsuna likes most about the beta, he wonders how much of it is forced.

He finds his answer three months after Yamamoto confesses to him. Tsuna's at home, bedridden due to his recent heat. It hit earlier and stronger than any of his previous ones, mostly just leaving Tsuna drowsier and weaker than normal. He hasn't seen Yamamoto in over four days, but they text often, and Yamamoto fills him in on what he's missing in class, which admittedly isn't much.

But Tsuna hasn't heard much of anything from Yamamoto since the previous night. His boyfriend texted him good morning as he usually does, but all the meaningless, flippant little messages Yamamoto drops into their chat are nowhere to be seen. As much as Tsuna tells himself it's probably nothing, his mind can't help but race.

Has Yamamoto changed his mind now that they don't see one another every day? Maybe he's finally realized that having Tsuna around is more trouble than it's worth. Tsuna wouldn't necessarily blame him if that were the case, but the thought still makes Tsuna's stomach hurt.

Around the time school ends for the day, Tsuna hears a knock on his bedroom door. He twists around in his bed, blinking blearily at the door as it creaks open. Nana pokes her head inside, and she smiles when she sees that Tsuna is awake. "Tsu-kun," she says softly, "Takeshi-kun is here. Should I send him up?"

Tsuna doubts Nana would be asking if Yamamoto were an alpha, but since he's a beta, the chances of things getting out of hand are slim to none. Tsuna can't imagine what he looks like. He hasn't had a proper shower in days, and he feels so hot and sweaty and gross overall. Tsuna doesn't have the energy to really move, much less make himself presentable, but he's not at all concerned about Yamamoto's self-control. He doesn't even make much of an attractive picture on a normal day.

"Sure," he replies, pushing himself up against his pillows as Nana ducks back out of the room.

It feels like a matter of seconds before Yamamoto is coming into the room. He leaves the door slightly open, creating a long beam of light across the carpet, and he smiles when their eyes meet.

"Hey," Yamamoto says softly, and all at once, Tsuna knows something is wrong. He isn't sure what tips him off, if it's Yamamoto's tone or his scent or something else, but Tsuna knows. "How are you feeling?"

"Gross," Tsuna replies, too tired to be anything but honest. He watches as Yamamoto grabs the chair from his desk and pulls it over to Tsuna's bedside. "Sorry if I smell or anything."

Yamamoto shakes his head, eyes landing everywhere but on Tsuna's face as he settles back in the chair. "It's… nice," Yamamoto says before letting out a small, awkward laugh. "Sorry if that's weird. I just like how you smell."

On a normal day, Tsuna would probably blush and stutter his way into a different topic. As it is, he just blushes and leaves it at that. Yamamoto finally looks at him, then, eyes roaming over Tsuna's face in a way that makes the omega want to pull his comforter over his head. "You okay?" he asks, hoping Yamamoto attributes the roughness of his voice to the heat.

"Yeah," Yamamoto says haltingly. "Yeah, I just. Missed you."

None of Yamamoto's usual cheer is present in his expression. The beta isn't exactly an open book, but Tsuna's gotten pretty used to determining Yamamoto's moods by his scent or tone of voice. All Tsuna can really sense now is… misery. It's acute, not at all the type of sadness Tsuna picks up from himself on his worst days, but it feels wrong coming from Yamamoto.

"I miss you, too," Tsuna replies, and Yamamoto blinks owlishly, like he wasn't expecting Tsuna to reciprocate. "Are you sure you're okay? You seem… off."

Yamamoto grimaces, leaning back in the chair as he rubs at the back of his neck. "I knew you'd probably notice," he says, but the slight twitch of his lips is fond. "You're so attuned to everything."

"Thanks, it's my anxiety," says Tsuna, and Yamamoto huffs out a small laugh.

"School just… I don't know, everything sucks when you're not there," Yamamoto explains, which wasn't really what Tsuna had been expecting him to say. "I don't really have anyone to talk to, and anyone who does try to talk to me just… " Yamamoto trails off, and his eyes seem to darken as he stares down at his hands, clasped together in his lap. His scent spikes briefly with anger, and Tsuna straightens against his pillows. "They say the dumbest shit. I almost wish everyone would just stop asking about us."

"What do they say?" Tsuna asks, unsure if he even wants to know.

"It doesn't matter," Yamamoto says, so quickly Tsuna almost bursts into startled laughter. "Nothing anyone thinks about us matters."

Tsuna hums, wishing he cared a little less about the thoughts and opinions of strangers.

"I just don't get why everyone's making a big deal out of it," Yamamoto continues, and Tsuna holds his tongue, knowing full well that he was also one of those people. "Even the guys on the baseball team. It's not like it's any of their business."

"They're your friends," Tsuna tries to say, but Yamamoto shakes his head.

"They aren't," he says fiercely. "Not if this is how they act when I'm actually happy for a change."

Tsuna doesn't know what to say, so he opts to keep quiet. Happiness and Yamamoto have almost always been synonymous in his mind. It never occurred to him that the same wasn't true for Yamamoto himself.

But now that it's right in front of him, Tsuna can see the strain Yamamoto's experiencing, has probably been experiencing. He isn't impervious to their peers' thinly veiled scorn; he's just much better at hiding it than Tsuna.

And Tsuna feels awful for not noticing before. All this time, he thought he was alone in his discomfort and frustration, but he wasn't and probably never had been.

Tsuna lifts his arms before he can think better of it. Yamamoto startles at the movement, glancing up at Tsuna with wide eyes. For a moment, they just stare at one another, until the omega in Tsuna begins to squirm and growl because it hates being denied. "Hug me," Tsuna huffs, and Yamamoto scrambles to do as he's told.

He sits down in the small space between Tsuna's legs and the edge of the bed and practically dumps himself into Tsuna's arms. The beta is quick to tuck his face into the curve of Tsuna's neck, where his scent is strongest, and Tsuna is filled with so much fondness it almost chokes him.

What it does do is force a low purr out of Tsuna's throat, and Yamamoto immediately goes boneless, leaving Tsuna to bear their weight. Tsuna handles this with as much grace as he's able, barely freaking out as he leans back against his pillows and rubs a hand up and down Yamamoto's back.

"I really like you, Tsuna," Yamamoto says, voice slurred and muffled into Tsuna's hot and sweaty skin. He hasn't said the other word since that first time, unwilling to set Tsuna off again, but Tsuna still knows, even if his insecurities raise their doubts.

"I really like you, too, Takeshi," Tsuna whispers in reply, and for the first time, he isn't scared by it.

Iemitsu comes home for the first time since Tsuna was little, and for some reason, Nana isn't happy to see him.

Tsuna can smell his mother's anger as soon as he steps into the house. It immediately puts him on edge, and he wishes he'd taken Yamamoto up on his offer to walk him home before baseball practice started.

"I'll deal with it, Nana," a voice says, and even if Tsuna doesn't quite recognize it, a small, instinctual part of him does recognize the strange scent in the air. "I didn't know – You never said – "

"You should've already dealt with it!" Nana snaps, and Tsuna chokes down the whine that crawls up his throat in response to his mother's anger. "No one gets to make decisions like that for my son, not you, not Timoteo - "

"Mom?" Tsuna calls. Without even bothering to take his shoes off, he hurries from the doorway and steps around the corner into the living room. He finds his parents sitting at the table, and he barely spares Iemitsu a glance before his eyes settle on Nana, whose hands are clenched into fists on the table. Tears stream unabashedly down her face, but her expression is as fierce as Tsuna's ever seen it. "What's going on?"

"It's okay, Tsu-kun," Nana says, though her eyes never leave Iemitsu's stricken face. "Everything's okay."

Nothing about this situation strikes Tsuna as okay. He's never once seen his mother cry, especially not over Iemitsu. She only ever has kind things to say about him, even though he's spent more time overseas than he ever has with them.

Nothing about what's happening is normal, but Tsuna trusts his mother; if she says everything is fine, then he has no reason to doubt her.

That doesn't mean he has to like it, however. When Iemitsu finally turns to regard him, Tsuna can't help but avert his eyes with a frown. "Your mom tells me you're being courted," he says before Tsuna can excuse himself. He sounds like he's being strangled, caught and pinned under his wife's furious glare. "Tsuyoshi's boy, huh?"

"His name is Takeshi," Tsuna says, only slightly shocked by how cold his voice sounds. This is the first time he's seen his father in years, and the man can't even give him an actual greeting? "I'm not surprised you don't remember."

Iemitsu's expression is complicated, like he wants to reprimand Tsuna for being disrespectful but won't dare to while Nana is around. He just sits there instead, an alpha cowed into silence by his omega wife and son.

"Would you mind stepping out, Tsu-kun? Your dad and I have a lot to talk about," Nana says at length. Her eyes soften when she finally turns to look at him, but Tsuna can tell she's hurting. Iemitsu has done something, and Tsuna doesn't want to leave her side. But he can also tell that Nana doesn't want him to see her like this, or to bear witness to whatever is about to happen. So, all Tsuna can really do is nod and quietly let himself out of the house.

Tsuna doesn't have a plan in mind as he leaves his neighborhood. He just walks and walks, and before he knows it, he's back at Namimori Middle, right by the baseball field. Tsuna freezes at the realization of where he's ended up, and he hesitates as he watches the players out in the field, unsure of what to do now that he's here.

"You're Takeshi-kun's boyfriend, aren't you?" Tsuna jumps as a girl walks up to him from the other side of the chain-link fence. She's one of the managers, Tsuna thinks, an omega third year with a pleasant smile and a low voice. "Did you need him for something?"

"Um, not really?" Tsuna replies, shifting his weight nervously. "I just… "

The matter is taken out of Tsuna's hands as a voice calls his name, and he and the manager both turn as Yamamoto jogs in from the outfield. "Hey," Yamamoto says in a huff, slightly red in the face and panting. He runs a hand through his sweaty hair, pushing it out of his face before shooting Tsuna a wobbly grin. That, more than anything, confuses Tsuna, even more than the amused snort the manager gives at the sight. "I thought you went home for the day?"

Tsuna's eyes dart to the manager briefly before fixing on Yamamoto again. He shrugs lamely, unsure of what to say. "I came back."

Yamamoto's brow crinkles, but Tsuna doesn't have time to get in another word before the beta turns to his manager. "Tell Coach I'll be back in a bit."

The manager waves him off, even as Tsuna sputters, "Wait, Yamamoto-kun, you don't have to – "

But he's already jogging away toward the gate, so Tsuna gives up. The manager shoots him a thumbs up before going back to the dugout, and Tsuna feels lost and tired as he waits for Yamamoto to get to him.

"So, what's up?" Yamamoto asks before he's even properly reached Tsuna. "Did you forget something?"

"My dad came home," Tsuna blurts out before he can think better of it. Yamamoto blinks down at him, eyes wide. "He and my mom were fighting or… something. I didn't know where else to go."

Yamamoto frowns as he glances back toward the field before reaching over and grabbing Tsuna's hand. Tsuna lets himself be led to the building where most of the sports clubs store their equipment. They pass about six doors before Yamamoto takes him into what can only be the clubroom for the baseball team.

The room isn't well-kept, with spare balls and bats littering the floor along with bits and pieces of uniform clothing. The room smells strongly of alpha musk and sweat, but the heat of Yamamoto's hand in Tsuna's keeps him from becoming overwhelmed.

"Are you okay?" Yamamoto asks quietly, drawing him into a hug that Tsuna can't help but melt into. This was probably what he'd wanted, when he wandered back to the school grounds in a daze. Tsuna can't even bring himself to feel embarrassed. "I know your relationship with your dad is… complicated."

Tsuna snorts. That was putting it mildly. "Mom was crying," Tsuna says instead, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. "She asked me to leave, but I still feel guilty for leaving her there."

"Nana can handle herself," Yamamoto says into Tsuna's hair. "I'm more worried about Iemitsu, honestly."

"It had something to do with me," Tsuna murmurs into the fabric of Yamamoto's practice jersey. "I don't know what else could make Mom that angry."

Yamamoto doesn't say anything, probably just as at a loss as Tsuna is. But he doesn't let go, even though he probably needs to get back to practice.

Tsuna resolves not to say anything. He'll let himself be selfish, this time.

Iemitsu is gone when Tsuna goes downstairs the next morning. Instead, he finds Nana sitting with Reborn at the table, talking quietly over cups of coffee. "Okay, what is going on?" Tsuna asks, still groggy and not entirely convinced he isn't dreaming. "Uncle Reborn?"

"Hopped on the first flight as soon as I heard Iemitsu was making an ass of himself," Reborn says mildly in lieu of a greeting. Unlike with Iemitsu, it doesn't make Tsuna angry. "Come sit with us, we've got a lot to go over."

"You don't have to worry about anything, Tsuna," Nana says, wrapping an arm around Tsuna's shoulders as he sits down in the chair next to her. "Your dad and I had a long talk yesterday. Things will work out, I promise."

"What will work out?" Tsuna asks helplessly. "Mom? What's going on?"

"First and foremost," Reborn interjects, "let's talk about stranger danger."