Chapter 5

Jodi, Donna and the girls came to Kansas to see Sam. They were all devastated. And they were concerned about Sam. He was not answering his phone, and they had not heard from him. They had no idea what they would find once they got to the bunker. They knew, however, through the hunter's grapevine that Sam was not hunting. No one had even seen Sam, as a matter of fact.

The women found the door to the bunker unlocked. They pushed the it open and were hit in the face with the odor of alcohol and garbage, rotten food. They all called out to Sam as they hurried down the stairs. But they stopped when they saw the condition of the place and heard him talking. Sam was meticulous. He cleaned up after Dean. But this place looked like nobody had washed a dish or picked up their trash in a month. They ignored the mess and moved closer to the sound of Sam having a conversation.

Sam looked rough. His hair was tousled, unwashed. And he had a bottle of whiskey in his hand.

"Why are you still here, Dean?" Sam said, talking to the air. "Why?"

The women looked around the room, Sam appeared to be alone.

Jodi cleared her throat and Sam looked in her direction. He had not seen or heard them come in.

"Hello, Jodi." Sam said, raising his bottle and taking a swig. "Hi, Ladies." He said, acknowledging the rest of the group.

"Where's Dean?" Donna asked, approaching him slowly.

Sam pointed to the air. "Right there!" he said, slurring his words. "But you can't see him or hear him because the bastard's DEAD!" He said angrily and took another swig from his bottle.

The women were stunned, and nobody said anything for a moment. They were all very concerned for Sam's mental wellbeing.

"Dean's not here, Sam." Claire said.

Sam shook his head so hard that he almost lost balance. "I'm the only one who can hear him. Well, me and Cas. Huh! Some angel he is…can't even…!" He took another drink from the bottle.

"Can't what, Sam?" Donna asked.

The question seemed to make Sam angry. "Bring him back. That's what!" He snapped. "He's…." He shook his head as his tears began to flow. He quickly wiped the tears away.

"They can't hear me, Sam." Dean said. "They can't see me either."

"Really? Really, Dean?" Sam said, speaking to the air. "Cause I hadn't figured that one out yet!" He snapped.

The girl just stood and stared. They had no idea what to make of what had just happened. They had not heard anything, before Sam started talking to the air again.

"Tell Jodi I'm sorry." Dean instructed Sam.

Sam seemed to be listening to something. The women saw him stop and concentrate on one area of the room, near where Jodi was standing. Dean had moved. He was now standing beside her.

"Why?"

"She had to…identify me." Dean explained. "I'm so sorry that I put her through that."

"What…what's going on, Sam?" Donna asked, when Sam seemed to stop listening.

Sam looked at Jodi. "Dean said he was sorry. He never wanted you to have to…identify him."

They were all stunned. Jodi had only told the girls and Donna. There was no way Sam could have known that. Nobody said anything for a few moments. Tears came to Jodi's eyes as she relived the moment.

Dean hugged her tightly, hoping she could feel his touch. She stood still as a feeling of coldness seemed to envelope her.

"Dean?" Jodi reached up, trying to touch the coolness that was still embracing her. She shook her head as flesh tears flowed. "I almost turned around and left, so many times. I…I stood outside those doors for…."

Sam put the bottle down. He seemed to be listening again. "He knows."

Jodi didn't know what to say. She just stared at Sam.

"Dean?" Donna said, surprised as she felt a coldness envelope her. She even thought she felt her hair, which she had not even thought about putting up, being touched.

"She's so much prettier with her hair down." Dean stated as he backed away from Donna.

Sam chuckled and grinned, tears in his eyes. Sam nodded. "I'll tell her."

Dean shook his head. That had slipped out. Though it was true. Donna needed to know that they BOTH thought that. Not just him. "No, Sammy! Tell her you felt the same way! You tell her that!"

"What are you going to do if I don't?"

"I'll haunt…."

Sam chuckled and shook his head. "Really? Kinda already doing that one."

"I'll…" Dean shook his head in frustration. "I'll think of something!"

Sam could imagine Dean pacing the floor in front of him. And it made him laugh.

"Bitch!"

"Jerk!"

"Dean just said you are much prettier with your hair down, Donna." Sam told her. "And, I agree."

Donna blushed a little bit. "Thanks, Sam. Thank you, Dean." She said to the air.

"If I was alive. She would probably have slapped me for saying something like that." Dean stated.

Sam smiled. "I think you're right."

"What?" Donna asked. Sam seemed to be listening again.

"He said you would have been a little less…gracious if he had said that to your face."

Donna nodded. "He's right." She paused. "Dean…are you…okay?" She paused again, trying to find the right words. "I mean…."

Dean smiled. "I'm not in any pain. I think that's what you want to know. I never felt any pain. I was knocked out. I didn't die immediately. But I was not in pain. Jodi needs to know that."

Sam nodded. "He's not in pain." He paused. "And, Jodi, he wanted you to know he was knocked out. He didn't die immediately. But he didn't suffer."

Jodie nodded and blinked as tears fell from her eyes. She was so very relieved to hear that. She felt the cold air around her again.

Patience stood staring. She could see Dean. Dean felt her eyes on him. He went over to her.

"You can see me." Dean stated.

TBC