That Fangirl Sarah: Thank youuuuuu

A Very Obsessed Fangirl: GIVE ME AN H- GIVE ME AN E- ADD A FEW MORE, WHAT DOES IT SPELL?!H-e-t-e-r-o-n-o-r-m-a-t-i-v-i-t-y! We shall kill it. Perhaps with a really long and rainbow sword.

Also, I am aware that I have used a certain Fitz trope mentioned in this story before, but I stand by the fact that this trope was the reason Fitz made all the mistakes he made in Legacy. If you find the line (It's almost exactly the same) and comment on either of the stories about it or PM me, I'll give you a shoutout next chapter. (Hint: It's in one of my other Fedex stories)

Fitz looks uncomfortable. We chose a bench towards the back of the park, surrounded by big trees, taller than my house and Everglan combined. We're sitting cross legged, facing each other. It is unfortunate Fitz looks uncomfortable, but also even more unfortunately, Fitz looks pretty. Fitz looks gorgeous and handsome and like everything I will never be. The sun is setting, the golden light pealing down on him. The fading sunshine streams through his eyelashes and I am overwhelmed. As he awkwardly shoves Mallowmelt into his mouth I am faced with the question.

Do I have a crush on Fitz Vacker?

I will explain my thought process to you. I don't think I like Fitz. I didn't think I liked Fitz. I mean, I thought I liked Sophie but the idea of being straight makes me cringe now so I don't think that my ability to put a finger on my feelings is that great. I glance at my mallowmelt, still wrapped in plastic. I unwrap the shiny material and shove it into my pocket with the key to Slurps and Burps and my wire end collection. Do I like Fitz? I take a bite of mallowmelt and I think about pre Sophie times. He'd call me Deck, and pretend I was trash. I didn't like him then, I knew that much.

"So," He says, snapping me out of my stupor. I can tell he remains uncomfortable. We're getting a few strange and dirty looks from passersbys. This park isn't well known among the higher classes of Elves, and most of the lower classes don't take kindly to families like the Vackers. "How have you been?" His accent trips me up. How long has it been doing that? I try to think back to a time when the sound of his voice didn't make my heart flip three times. I can't find one.

"Good," I say cautiously, trying not to stutter. "I-uh, as you may have noticed, I started an uprising," he doesn't smile. I am surprised at how much I miss the sight of it. The sides of his mouth slightly turned up, his head tipped back slightly. Quite the opposite of what he's doing now.

"Yes. I noticed," it's awkward. Why is it awkward? It shouldn't be awkward. I glance up at him but he's busy looking anywhere but my eyes. I watch his eyes for a second, teal and bright as they scan the park. I let my eyes, just for a second hold on his lips, wondering how they felt. Did I like Fitz? I blink away from his mouth.

"I'm sorry," I say. This snaps his eyes right into mine. It takes all of my focus not to glance away. I hold his gaze, steady and fragile.

"For what?" It's become a staring contest now. I can feel the tension melting off of us like ice in the sun.

"I dunno, you've obviously been affected by it. I think at some point, we're going to start causing more pain than good," he tips his head back, and I can see the smile creeping up his face as my eyes burn.

"We had it coming for us. It's not like I'm actually useful," his eyes crinkle and I'm sure that if I broke our steadfast gaze I would see his lips crawling up his cheeks. It makes me sad that he finds this a joke.

"You're plenty useful Fitz," I say. That makes him snap. His eyes tear away from mine, his smile falls. He blinks several times, shaking the burn of the staring contest out of his head. I blink at the grace in the motion he had just made.

"I'm not. I can't do alchemy or build gadgets like you do. I can't be as great a telepath as Sophie, I can't even be a good boyfriend to Sophie," I must've made a strange look because Fitz blushes and goes "not that I'm even her boyfriend anymore," we're both blushing now. Why am I blushing? UGH. FEELINGS. Do I have them? I mean, obviously I have them, stirring inside me like Keefe said they would, but do I have them for Fitz?

"You're not useless Fitz. I could teach you to do alchemy, it's not that hard," he tips his head back.

"Not going to say anything about Sophie then?" It's a bold move. I know it's a bold move. What does he want from me? Does he know I like him? Do I know I like him? No. To both. The answer has to be no to both.

"What do you want me to say Fitz?" I don't know what's happening. It's going a little too fast for me to follow.

"Didn't you like her?" Another bold move. It's like he's bringing a red paint brush across my black canvass of… Innocence? I don't know. It was a good metaphor until it wasn't. Though there isn't any fun in a game of one though is there? I lock eyes with him.

"I'm gay," this takes him a second to process. At first he's startled, but it's his fault. He shouldn't have been so blunt if he hadn't wanted me to be blunt back. But then he looks relieved. Why does he look relieved? I pinch my face into a mask of confusion. It isn't very hard, because I am very confused.

"What?" He asks me.

"You look relieved," I say.

"It's because I am," He scoots closer to me. I can see his composure melting. His slightly to straight back, his pinched shoulders. Our knees touch for a second as he settles down again. I feel the residual spark from our short contact shoot up me. I cock my head to the side.

"And why is that?" He looks surprised again, as if he wasn't expecting me to ask him. I glances up at me vulnerably and then down at his hands, where a half eaten slice of mallowmelt sits.

"I didn't want to be a disappointment twice," he says quietly after a second. Before I can ask a followup he continues, "I didn't want to be a bad match with Sophie. I wouldn't have cared, I really wouldn't have if I didn't have this, thing inside me. I don't think I could take it, being a bad match and being bisexual. I don't think anybody in my family could take it, I think I would be outcast from having the Vacker name," he's shaking. I can feel the reverberation of the word Bisexual bouncing around inside of me. Bisexual Bisexual Bisexual.I make another bold move and take his hand. He smiles mischievously, and makes the boldest move of all.

And he kisses me.

It becomes pretty clear that I like Fitz Vacker and even clearer that Fitz Vacker likes me too.