In a small village in the Land of Tea, so far out of the way they are about ten years behind on most news and technology, a middle aged couple are sitting down having a cup of tea.
The man has round glasses and hair that turned grey a few years ago. His wife still has some of the golden blonde colour of her youth left in her hair. The woman is reading the latest newspaper, one that a travelling merchant gave her a few days ago. It is by no means the most recent newspaper from the Hidden Leaf, but it is the most recent source of news from the outside world.
"What's the news from the Hidden Leaf?" asks the man.
"Danzo is dead, the children from his Root program are being integrated into the ninja Academy, and the twice-yearly chunin exams are in two weeks' time," the woman reports.
"Ah," the man says, finishing his cup of tea. "So things in the Leaf are their usual 'a disaster just happened, but on the upside life goes on'?"
"It seems like it," replies his wife. "Now if you're finished your cup of tea, let's get you to your optometrist appointment."
Once her husband is safely at his appointment, the woman picks up a random magazine from the table full of old and newer books and magazines. Nothing catches her attention, so she puts it back and rifles through her other options. A book half hidden by hunting magazines catches her attention. She picks it up, discovering that it is an old Shinobi Bingo Book. Curiosity aroused, the woman flicks through the book, stopping occasionally to read an interesting looking profile. Apparently, there is a woman called 'Kushina' who has a flee on sight order. Nice to see woman kind is being represented in the Shinobi world too. The woman flicks through the book until she sees a familiar face staring at her from the pages of the book.
She reads through that profile twice, her heart hammering her ribcage like a professional boxer. Slowly she stands up and walks to the room where her husband is having his eye exam. Pushing past the optometrist, she puts the book in her husband's hands and says, "Our son is alive."
When Hinata arrived at the Hyuuga compound riding a majestic pink unicorn, it caused quite a stir. Hiashi Hyuuga loves his daughter, but even he did a double take when Hinata informed everyone that Sparkles the Unicorn will be sleeping in her bedroom. "No, Hinata," he had told her. "Unicorns are not inside pets. He can stay in the garden outside your room, alright?"
Hinata had argued that Sparkles would get lonely and cold out there by himself. "Besides," she'd added. "We are going into business together so we need to have our headquarters somewhere."
And that is why Hiashi is currently overseeing the construction of a Unicorn house (Hinata refuses to call it a stable) for Sparkles. Sometimes Hiashi wishes his daughter wasn't quite so bold and demanding.
After the last hard day of training before the chunin exams, Iruka arrives home around four o'clock thoroughly exhausted. Upon opening the door, he sees a huge mess of ink spilled across the dining table.
Well, it looks like Naruto just has to cut himself and draw a seal on himself in order to do everything Iruka specifically cautioned him against.
"Iruka niisan?"
Iruka follows the sound of Naruto's voice. "Naruto, how did you get on the ceiling?" Iruka asks, feeling done.
"Um, I cut myself and spilled all the ink," admits Naruto. "Please don't be mad, but I kinda wrote an anti-gravity seal on my arm in my own blood."
Iruka is too tired to be mad. "If you don't mind spending the night on the ceiling we can deal with this in the morning. Now I had better clean this mess up so we can have some tea."
Naruto spends the most unusual night of his life, sleeping on the ceiling wrapped in his fuuton. No matter how hard he tries, he cannot deactivate the seal. Despite the weirdness of the situation, Naruto sleeps quite soundly. After all, there is a saying that says something about comfortable beds being like sleeping on air, and Naruto is literally sleeping on air. At least now he can make the comparison based on actual experience.
The next day is the day before the final round of the chunin exams. Iruka niisan has the day off to rest and prepare mentally. Unfortunately, there is not a lot of rest on the agenda, what with having to do something about Naruto's floating. After breakfast, Iruka niisan leaves to find someone to help, since he cannot deactivate the seal himself. Naruto waits on the kitchen ceiling for him to return.
After a short while, Iruka niisan returns with Hinata's dad and the nice police chief. "Hi!" Naruto waves to them from the ceiling.
"Hello Naruto," says Hinata's dad. "How did you enjoy your night on the ceiling?"
"It was fun," says Naruto. "But I think I want to come down now."
"Only you would get yourself into this kind of mess," says the nice police chief, shaking his head.
"Hey, I like your mustache!" says Naruto, grinning.
"It is finished now," says the police chief, twirling the end of his gentleman's mustache around his finger.
"It's glorious," says Hinata's dad, hiding a smile behind his hand. "Let's see if we can figure out how to deactivate that seal." His eyes go all gross with popped veins and clear pupils.
"AHH!" Naruto screams. "What's up with your eyes?!"
The policeman starts laughing hysterically. "He hangs around your kid, but he's never seen byakugan!"
"What's a ba-ku-thingy?" asks Naruto, confused.
"Byakugan," correct Hinata's dad. "It's a doujutsu - a hereditary eye power. It allows me to see the flow of chakra, among other things. Every Hyuuga has the byakugan."
"How come I've never seen Hinata use it?" asks Naruto.
"Probably because it's used for ninja things," grins the police Chief. "The Uchiha clan has a doujutsu too, but unlike the lucky Hyuugas, we don't all have it. Ours is called Sharingan. It looks like this see?" His eyes turn red.
"WAAH!" Naruto freaks out. "Your eyes are bleeding!"
"No, Naruto," sighs the police chief. "This is the Sharingan."
"Oh." Naruto stares at the freaky doujutsu. "So what does it do?"
"The Sharingan can see through jutsu," explains the police chief. "Hopefully together Hiashi and I can figure out how you are floating and turn off the seal."
"Oh." Naruto isn't sure about these doujutsu things. "Do those doujutsu thingys hurt your eyes?" he asks.
"Only if you use them too much."
"So what do you think, Fugaku?" asks Hinata's Dad.
"I'm stumped," admits the policeman. "You got anything?"
"Nope, I can't make head or tail of it. These Uzumakis are a breed apart."
"Maybe Shisui will be able to figure this out. He's just as bonkers as Naruto and his Sharingan is a lot stronger than mine."
"Good idea. I'll get the only person in my clan with a stronger byakugan than mine." Hinata's dad turns to Iruka niisan. "We'll be back with help soon."
About half an hour later, Hinata's dad returns with a man who looks exactly like him. In fact, Naruto can't tell which one is Hinata's dad. "Um…" he stammers. "Which one of you is Hinata's dad?"
"That would be me," says the one on the left. "This is my twin brother Hizashi."
"Hi Hinata's Uncle!" says Naruto cheerfully.
"My name is Hizashi," snaps Hinata's Uncle.
"Oh, okay Hinata's Uncle Hizashi! Can you help me get down?"
Hinata's Uncle Hizashi sighs and takes a look at Naruto with his byakugan. He shakes his head and says, "I can't make head or tail of this seal either."
"Damn," says Iruka niisan. "Right now I really wish there was an experienced Uzumaki for me to ask."
"Aren't there any other people from my clan left?" asks Naruto curiously.
"Not that we know of," replies Hinata's dad. "But the people of the Hidden Whirlpool scattered far and wide, so maybe there are still some out there."
At that moment, the nice police chief returns with Shisui.
"Hi Shisui!" Calls down Naruto.
Shisui takes one look at Naruto and falls to the floor in a fit of laughter.
"Um, Shisui?" the nice police chief. "Can you stop laughing and have a look at the anti gravity seal making Naruto float?"
"Why?" giggles Shisui. "He wrote it on HIMSELF. Even if we -" giggle, giggle "- deactivate it, there is a chance he'll accidentally re-activate it." Shisui rolls around and thumps the floor with his fist while holding his stomach. "Wouldn't it be better to let him figure out how to control the seal now that he's -" snort, giggle "- stuck with it forever?" Shisui giggles a bit more then asks, "What did you draw the seal with, anyway?" and goes back to giggling.
"Um, I wrote it with my own blood," admits Naruto.
"Yeah, he needs to learn to control it," agrees Hinata's Uncle Hizashi. "That seal is there for keeps, and there is no guarantee he won't turn it back on accidently if we switch it off."
"So what you're saying is that I'm stuck with a floating Naruto?" asks Iruka.
"Only until he learns to control it," says the nice police chief.
"Until then," giggles Shisui, who is still rolling around on the floor. "Why don't you turn him into a balloon?"
"I don't want to be a balloon!" whines Naruto, and starts crying.
"Woah, don't cry!" Shisui shunshins onto the ceiling and gives Naruto a hug. "I just meant that we should get one of those child harnesses with the leashes on them so that you don't float away when you go outside. You'll need someone to hold the end at all times, though."
"Oh, that's alright then," says Naruto, cheering up. "So long as Sparky gets to come too."
"Sparky? You mean the phoenix you accidently summoned along with that unicorn?" says Hinata's dad.
Shisui laughs so hard he falls off the ceiling.