Chapter 1: That September Day
Chapter Text
The sound of heavy footsteps rang throughout the empty hallways of Seoul National University. Class having gone overtime by 30 minutes, Yoongi found himself rushing to his oft-frequented practice room in class 304, eager to start preparing for the piano competition that was a mere three months away. He had already spent many days mastering Liszt's Liebenstraum compositions, recalling countless hours sleeping on the piano when fatigue would strike randomly in the middle of practice.
But those hours didn't matter, he thought, for this was the competition that could kickstart his budding career as a professional pianist. If he won, he would get the opportunity of a lifetime to study abroad in Germany amongst the brightest and most talented musicians of his generation. Yoongi would do anything and everything in his power to secure that first-place prize.
Arriving at the classroom, panting and out of breath, Yoongi flung the sliding doors open to reveal an unusual sight: a stunningly beautiful man sat slouched against the wall, tears streaming down his perfectly clear skin. Though his eyes were red and puffy, Yoongi couldn't help but take notice of this stranger's pristine beauty, undisturbed by his obvious display of emotions.
Unaware that he was staring for a second too long, Yoongi, heart racing, was now out of breath for a different reason.
"Do you need something?" The stranger's melodious voice reached out.
"I'm sorry, I didn't think anyone would be using this room right now..." Yoongi went to close the doors and exit before the voice piped up again.
"Don't worry. Stay! Do whatever you need to do. Act like I'm not even here." His voice was beautiful even when shaking.
"...Thank you," Yoongi replied, as he awkwardly stumbled into the room and onto the piano seat. He let out an audible gulp before resting his hands gently on the ivory keys and letting the notes of Liebenstraum sing to their heart's content.
Yoongi felt a complex mix of apprehension and uncontrollable pride. Whenever he played alone in this room, the notes of the piano simply floated in the air, escaping out of the ribbon windows that framed the classroom, never to be seen again.
This time was different.
Maybe because the weather was the perfect balance of cool and warm. Maybe because the falling autumn leaves outside created an orange glow that illuminated the keys just right. But most likely due to the fact that he wanted to impress the pretty boy peacefully closing his eyes next to him, the notes seemed to dance and glide around the classroom, echoing and pulsating. It was as if when his hands touched each key, he brought them to life, the notes springing forth from the body of the instrument and savoring the short time that they had within the confines of practice room 304.
The stranger sat silently, being careful not to stir or make any sudden moves lest he interrupt this creative process. He let the notes filter through him, each thrum of an arpeggio sending slight electrical impulses throughout his body. It sounded exactly the way he imagined love felt like. Calm, yet soaring. Quiet, yet powerful. Liebenstraum no. 3.
Love's Dream.
As the notes died out and the song had come to a close, Yoongi reclined, letting his hands fall gracefully to his lap.
He heard the sound of slow clapping, and turned his head to see the beautiful stranger sitting upright, a small smile drawn out along their statuesque features.
"That was absolutely lovely! I'm glad I stayed to listen to this." He grinned. "You're very talented, you know."
"Thank you," Yoongi responded curtly, embarrassed by the sudden attention.
The stranger was about to make another comment when the doors swung open once again. A tall, tanned man intruded the quiet space, stomping around the class, eyes darting until they settled and stayed on the mysterious individual who had occupied the practice room floor.
"JIN!" The man snarled, his eyes a bloody red.
"Oh... oh no," Jin said, as he got up from his comfortable position against the wall. "Please don't do this in front of my friend... my friend..." He snapped in the air, as if trying to recall some important information. He turned to Yoongi, who was sitting shocked on the piano chair. "Sorry, what's your name?"
"Uh... It's Min Yoongi."
"Ah..." Jin nodded solemnly before turning his attention back to the angry intruder. "Don't do this in front of my new friend Yoongi!"
"You didn't give me a chance to explain myself!" He drew closer.
"What is there to explain? I saw you kissing her in the parking lot after class, clear as day! I don't doubt what my eyes saw." Jin backed away towards the corner.
"She kissed me first!" The man was getting angrier, his chest heaving with every breath.
"Oh hoho ho!" Jin smiled, as a complicated expression of anger and jealousy and haughtiness played across his face. "Sure she did! As if the make-out session didn't drag on for at least five minutes!"
"You don't understand. I love you!"
They were an inch away from each other, Jin backed against the corner of the room with no escape in sight. The smile fell from his face as he steeled his nerves and stood his ground, staring directly into the eyes of the opposing man.
"Like hell you do," He spat.
Yoongi, still seated at his position behind the piano, couldn't quite see the looming figure in front of him despite his overwhelming presence. Instead, his eyes were locked onto Jin's, and he couldn't help but look anywhere else. Though Jin tried his best to stand tall, Yoongi could see that tears were threatening to burst from his eyes at any moment. His delicate hands were shaking. His previously melodious voice was wavering.
Yoongi just couldn't stand it.
With footsteps that spoke of thunder, Yoongi made his way to Jin and placed himself between him and the man, his hand guiding Jin firmly behind his back.
"And who do you think you are?" The man glared, contempt written all over his burly features.
"Just like Jin said. I'm his new friend." Yoongi smiled to himself for making such a stupid joke, which came off instead as an air of unearned confidence. "Now, if you'll kindly leave, I would be happy to escort you out of the room."
Gesturing towards the door, Yoongi stood firm. He watched as the man glanced at him, then at the cowering Jin, too scared to move a muscle or to even meet his gaze. A flash of sadness crossed his eyes as he shrunk, willingly letting Yoongi shove him out of the room.
"There!" Yoongi clasped his hands together. "Just watched him round the corner, so I doubt he'll be sticking around," Yoongi said, quite satisfied. He shut the doors and turned around to face Jin, who subsequently collapsed to his knees. With a long sigh, Jin clutched his chest, hands still shaking from the upsetting encounter.
"Yoongi..." His already small voice trailed off. "I'm so glad you were here with me. I don't know what I would've done without you." He chuckled, clearly in shock, his laughter graced with the slightest hint of melancholy.
Yoongi rushed over to him. "It's okay now. I made sure he's gone." He said, in as soothing a voice he could muster.
"I know." Jin smiled. "And I'm grateful for it."
Jin got up off his knees and crawled back to the wall, relief seemingly escaping from his every pore. Yoongi, thinking that it would be strange to just start playing the piano again, settled himself next to him, placing some ample distance between them and making sure Jin was comfortable first before actually sitting down.
"I'm here if you need to talk," Yoongi said, resting his hands in his lap.
Jin closed his eyes and sighed once again. He took a moment to collect himself before answering. "I... I think I'll take you up on that offer. I've had quite the day, after all."
Glaring daggers at the door that the intruder exited from, Jin started, "It's kinda cheesy to say, but it really is true what they say. Love is hard."
Yoongi prepared himself.
"One second you give him everything and then in another you find him kissing some pretty young thing like it's no big deal at all! I don't get it! I know that we had been... growing apart for some time now, but I would've never expected him to go and do something like... well, like this! It's not like I didn't love him—of course, I loved him—I was just... I was just busy."
He paused for some time, his long fingers repeatedly tracing the lines etched on the tile floor as he chewed his lip anxiously. Yoongi, noticing that it was hard for him to go on, rested his hand on his shoulder. Jin glanced over, flashing a weak smile before continuing on.
"I guess I saw the signs for a long time now, but I was helpless to do anything. Even if I tried to make things right, I just was never enough. It's like... I'm watching a movie of my own life." He looked up again, eyes welling with tears, before facing the floor, head drooping low in contemplation. "Someone inside my head screams for me to do something, but I'm powerless until it's too late. And the movie ends just as soon as it had begun."
"As pathetic and equally narcissistic as this is for me to say, maybe all he saw in me was a pretty face." He laughed at his sarcasm, a low chuckle rising out of his throat. "He fell in love with the idea of who I was, not the actual me. When he found out that I didn't match his perception of the perfect person, the dream shattered. He treated me differently."
Yoongi could feel Jin's shoulders tense up underneath his loose grip.
"I think he was disappointed. He became distant. I noticed that he would spend so much time staring at his phone whenever we went out on dates. When I kissed him, he didn't kiss back. He wouldn't even look at me anymore! Instead, he would... he would..."
The first tear had crashed onto the linoleum tiles.
"And—and when I saw him kissing her... kissing her like she made him feel alive... it was like everything I had known was confirmed. I wasn't enough for him, and I knew it. I hated being right. Why did I have to be right? Maybe—maybe everything was my fault? Should I have tried harder? I don't know! I really don't..."
The tears came down like a hurricane, emotions swirling and storming in Jin's head. Yoongi said absolutely nothing, instead, choosing to wrap both of his arms around Jin and pull him to his chest. There was no hesitation or awkwardness in his movements—just warmth and affection where it was needed. The two stayed in that position for a while, Jin sobbing as Yoongi's arms held him so gently, so lovingly.
Jin had never felt so vulnerable before. But it wasn't the weak kind of vulnerable. It was the kind of vulnerable where he could be who he was and be accepted unconditionally. It was the kind of vulnerable where he could spill his thoughts freely without feeling like he over-shared or said too much. It was the kind of vulnerable where he felt seen.
He was surprised at how wonderful crying could feel when wrapped in someone else's arms.
As Jin's sobs grew softer and softer, Yoongi finally spoke up.
"Are you okay now?" He whispered.
Jin nodded silently.
"Would you like me to walk you to your car to make sure he's not still around?"
"No..." Jin shook his head. "If you let me, could I just stay here and listen to you play for a little while longer?"
Without even making a sound, Yoongi carefully pulled himself away from Jin and sat down on the piano bench, giving his fingers a stretch before landing them on the keys.
As the notes filled the university hallways, as the sunset beamed through the window and enveloped room 304 in a warm haze, as Jin tapped his feet to the tune, and as Yoongi noticed that he was, the two sat and listened to the music, wishing and wanting for nothing. If they could stay like this for just one moment more...
No. This was more than enough.