As the ruins rumbled, the city shook and what had once been the Institute crumbled into dust, Nate stared blindly on.
As the Minutemen cheered and the Commonwealth breathed a sign of long awaited relief, he had no words, no feeling.
His son was gone, and so was Nora, and so was everyone else who he had ever known from before. All ties to his world, to his past, had been violently severed - and he had only himself to blame.
He had been the orchestrator of his own sorrow, he had made the choice. Nate looked down to his shotgun, perhaps his most loyal companion to date, and wondered what it would be like to blast a shell through his own skull. Would it hurt less than this?
"Blue..." whispered Piper, following his eyes and grabbing for his hand. She knew him well, as well as anyone could. Blue was thoughtful, careful and definitely an over-thinker. And while he'd made no big declarations or commentaries on how Shaun, his son, was leader of the most hated and feared organisation in the Commonwealth, she knew that it plagued his mind. Always.
She could see it in the way he walked, slightly less care-free than when they'd first met. He laughed less, and smiled more; but it was a crooked, hollow thing, that put no one at ease - least of all himself.
And now, as he looked on, at the grave of his only son, his eyes looked a little duller, his back a little more hunched.
And then the truth was gone, and he smiled.
"It's done." He said simply, with a thin veneer of confidence. And then he walked over to the elevator, and left the cheers and claps and her, behind.
Life in the Commonwealth was great, truly. It was the best Piper had ever seen it. Caravans moved from settlement to settlement safely, Diamond City flourished now that it was no longer under Institute leadership, and people finally had hope.
The Brotherhood and Minutemen had come to some uncomfortable alliance, and the Railroad were civil - at least, for now. Blue had truly gone on as though nothing traumatic had happened, spinning a web of civility with his undeniable charisma. And for him, the Commonwealth was indebted.
Despite his character, his selflessness and sense of morality, Piper didn't really believe that he'd done it all for them. He needed the Commonwealth as much - if not maybe more - than it needed him now. He needed problems to solve, people to talk to and a busy mind, lest he finally face his own, unrelenting demons.
She'd raised these concerns to Nick one night, as they'd passed through Diamond City on the way to the Castle. The town was still in need of a Mayor, but for now, bathing in the afterglow of the Institutes defeat, residents were content.
Blue had gone to Duggout Inn to catch up with Vadim, so she'd lied and said she needed to help Nat with the printing press. Blue wasn't the most... technical guy, so he hadn't offered to help - thank god. And they'd both gone their separate ways.
Ellie poured her a warm cup of... something, while she sat chatting to the old Synth.
"It's just... he's running from something, from the truth and the pain that It'll bring... I think. Not sure though. Just a guess." Said Piper, a little nervous to be discussing Blues innermost feelings at all, least without him present.
"Yea," agreed Nick. "I've seen it. He's acting more... synthetic than me these days, if that's possible." And he smiled at his own joke.
Then he went serious. "He needs to face it, if not soon... it's gonna whittle him away."
Ellie signed from the corner of the room, unable to not listen in on what was, quiet frankly, a riveting conversation.
"It's just so sad!" She announced, almost tearful, "Why do good things happen to good people?"
"Life is cruel." stated Nick.
"You can't... are you sure?!" Asked Maxson, soundly oddly childish without his gruff facade. The shock had wiped it clean away.
"Look Maxson, I don't know for sure, but that's what the reports are saying. They think they've found her."
"And... her condition?" Asked the Elder, making an effort to level his tone.
"I mean, it was a raider den... looks like she'd been shooting up for..."
"God..." said Maxson, his eyes transfixed on the distant skyline.
It had been... Years. 5, maybe? Since the incident where Sarah... where Elder Lyons had been killed. Maxson hadn't... wouldn't get over it. He knew that much. But he'd had responsibilities, a whole organisation, a brotherhood around him, so he'd kept on going, living, struggling... the same couldn't be said for her.
The last time he'd seen her, she'd thrown him a peace sign and told him to 'peace out', whatever that meant. It made him laugh then, it didn't now.
And then she'd disappeared, the same as she'd come.
For a time, the reports were frequent and undeniably accurate - apparently, any and all Enclave survivors had been wiped clean off the face of the Earth. And then she'd violently rid the Capital of all the slavers, raiders and mutants that dared to raise their heads... and then, Maxson supposed, she'd run out of things to kill.
There was the odd rumour that she'd died, that some raider has struck a lucky blow. Maxson had never believed them, of course. But maybe they hadn't been referring to bullets, and explosions and fists, maybe they'd been referring to this... to a loss of character, of self.
"Where is she now?" He demanded.
"They picked her up in the Pitt but they've brought her back, and they're treating her in the Rotunda."
"Is she safe to travel?"
"She should be... it's more ment-"
"Good. I can't leave here, not now. I need to be here, or the Minutemen will push us out completely." He was in a precarious position in the Commonwealth, but he had to see her. "Bring her here".
The Lone Wanderer was family, and he didn't have much of that left, not anymore. And besides, she could be just the edge the Brotherhood needed in their current stalemate.
"Yes...sir".