HOLAA913: Yeah, it was really annoying and I felt bad to leave my readings confused. I didn't even notice it until one of you messaged me about it.

LoveToBake: Definitely. But when they go home, will things get back to normal? Hmm...

phoenix: I make them suffer so much. Especially Luffy and Ace in my stories. I've killed Luffy off so many times. Lol my first posted fanfiction had child Luffy and Zoro both die.

1andonlyjack: Thank you! I'm glad you like it.

94Insane: Poor Thatch indeed. :(

Getting closer to finishing a couple of my current stories! I have over 750,030 words worth of stories to post. -_- 7 fanfictions, four over 100,000 words with one 200,000 words. So, I won't be running out of things to post for awhile lol. Enjoy~

Thatch and Deuce were sitting at the wall, waiting. Thatch asked, "Deuce? Is it our fault?" in a small voice. The blue haired man didn't lie, so he wasn't going to start now.

"Most likely. They used to have a very strict, concrete reset calendar. Every two weeks, and the night before they'd feel pretty crappy. Since on this ship, it's out of whack and they were showing symptoms the other day. It hurt them. Even if they're not resetting, having any of the symptoms is scary and painful. Luffy needed to sleep with the ventilator the other night."

Thatch put his head in his hands. Deuce felt pity for him. He was the only one on the ship that any of them had come to like and possibly trust. But he still was part of the kidnapping, there was no way to beat around that bush.

"I'm so sorry," he said quietly.

"I'm sure they'd appreciate that."

"But it doesn't change anything."

"No, it doesn't."

Since there had been no one in the galley when the Spades were eating, no one saw the whole thing. When the group was running to the infirmary, Ace sobbing and bleeding, they ran into people but Thatch shoved them out of the way and didn't answer any of their frantic questions. Thatch sighed, and asked, "Is there no way for us to help them?"

Deuce nodded. "Take us all home as fast as possible. They won't be joining your crew. No matter how much you ask or want it, even if you started being wonderful and nice. It was their dreams to be free, pirate captains. To sail on the sea, and do whatever the hell they wanted. Even if it meant resetting in dangerous places, or all being unconscious on a tiny pirate ship, it was to head towards their dream so they did it."

"And we ended all of that," Thatch said flatly. Deuce was glad he caught on and the man didn't need to be mean. Well, make him feel any worse than he'd already made him. The Spade nodded.

The other Spades were in various places in the room, many asleep. It was late now, but Deuce stayed up to make sure they were safe while so vulnerable.

"Yeah," he said simply.

-x-

Marco knocked on Thatch's bedroom door. "Thatch, it's lunch time. Your sous chefs were told you got sick. Come out already," the blonde said, not knowing why Thatch was acting this way. When Thatch opened the door, Marco was shocked at the state he was in. His hair was a mess, he had bags under his eyes and they were red, like he'd been crying.

"Thatch, what happened?" Marco asked in shock and concern. The chef looked away. But then he replied.

"He was crying that he didn't want it to happen again. He was bleeding out of his face, crying because he didn't want to go through it again. We made them this way. Such a huge mistake… they're in pain, scared and angry because we refused to take their feelings into account. There's no way to fix this ourselves.

"I don't want to talk anymore. I promise I'll be out by dinner," the chef said, sniffling before shutting the door and locking it.

Marco stood in the hallway, head down, consumed with guilt and shame.

-x-

"I've come to a decision!" Luffy announced in their bedroom, a few hours after they woke up. "We won't think about the resets or the symptoms. That's no way to live your life! We have to enjoy stuff, and not worry about what we can't control," the youngest said. All of the Spades looked at him in shock. "What?" he asked, not understanding why they were reacting the way they were.

Ace got up and hugged him. "Our baby boy grew up!" Luffy squirmed. Sabo laughed and joined the hug.

"I think that is a great idea, Lu. We can't wallow in fear over what we can't control. We have to manage it. There's nothing we can do about it. You're right, we need to live full lives, even darkness will blanket it in a second," Sabo agreed, beaming. Ace let Luffy out of the hug, and Luffy grinned, happy to make his precious brothers happy.

The rest of the Spades felt energized as well. "Why don't we go play outside?" Sabo offered. "There's a lot of room to play tag."

"Yeah!" Luffy shouted, and he ran out of the room, his brothers following after him, bypassing curious pirates without a glance. The tag was violent. They tagged one another by some sort of punch or kick. Luffy cheated badly, stretching his arm to tag someone. But there were no rules, so it was allowed.

It was the most fun they'd had in a while, and it drew attention, especially when Luffy rested on the yardarm and throwing punches below to tag any unsuspecting Spades. When he fell off of it, he laughed and didn't scream when he bounced back up like a rubber ball. The tag resumed until they were all tired and hungry. They hadn't had breakfast yet.

When they entered the galley, they knew that the news had spread around. About their messy reset. Maybe it was Thatch, maybe it was a nurse, who knows? Ace, Luffy and Sabo, now on a mission to be positive, did not react badly to the stares. They went to the counter, got their food and left to go eat outside, since the weather was nice.

No one approached them, which was appreciated. They were fine if no Whitebeard pirate talked to them again. As long as they continued to take them back home. It was welcome that they would fix the PoS, but it was out of guilt probably.

Thatch came out once their plates were clean, all the food eaten, and he brought out some fountain drinks. He set down the tray in front of them. The group thanked him and took the drinks, not even asking what was in it. They knew Thatch wouldn't poison them.

Two days passed, and it felt like it was taking longer to go back. It wasn't, but it felt like it was. They yearned to be back home, and hoped PoS was still there, hadn't been ransacked of personal belongings. They knew nobody would find their stash of treasure. It was too well hidden.

For much of the time, the brothers napped. Their bodies were tired, so they did as it wished and went to sleep. The Spades didn't always sleep, but there was always someone in the room with them. Jojo was stress-cooking again, and the others were usually in the library. Deuce was usually the one that stayed with them, napping as well.

There were no symptoms at the moment, but it was made clear that it could change at a moment's notice.

-x-

A week later, they reset again. Since they'd been showing consistent signs all day, they were brought to the infirmary, the beds pressed together. This time, the Whitebeards did something to help, and sedated all three of them, heavily, so they wouldn't wake up while resetting. Ace and Sabo were laying on towels so the blood didn't stain the sheets like it had the last time.

And, staying asleep, had been a great idea. They'd tried it before, but never was comfortable with giving them too much. Marco had pointed out that they'd die regardless, so it didn't matter if they gave too much anesthesia. And that was true.

The Spades had been in there with them while the three who knew were there as well. Thatch was sitting against the wall, head in his hands. It was still their fault that this happened early, but at least it had been a couple days longer than the last time, and not as messy or upsetting. Marco was also looking upset, staring at the floor while Whitebeard just looked at the three of them.

Deuce could tell they were feeling guilt, and he wasn't upset about it. But, with the brothers being in a less stressed environment, and knowing they would be home again, safe and sound away from their kidnappers, their symptoms were ebbing away.

They smiled more, and as a result, so did the rest of the crew. Their pre-reset symptoms had not shown up on a day where they didn't reset. Deuce was sitting next to Luffy, brushing his fingers across Luffy's cold skin. Deuce was so happy that he didn't need to see Luffy die, didn't need to close his eyelids for him. Out of all of what happened, including Ace's graphic resets, Luffy's death was what really hit Deuce.

Seeing the youngest frantically try to continue to breathe even after his brothers were both gone broke his heart. How he had tears in his dead eyes still, his face still in the form of that devastated expression, his brows drawn together and miserable frown on. This time, he didn't need to see it. He didn't need to comfort him in his last moments as he sobbed and gasped.

Hopefully they could do this every time. It would be a load off of the whole crew. Sure, Ace still reset gruesomely, but it didn't involve the usual reaction. The fear and pain in his eyes. This was the preferable method, the best chance of giving them at least some break while they reset. Hopefully the stress ebbing away would return things back to how they were. If not, then the Spades didn't know what they'd do. Well, they'd support their captains, but it would be morally bad for all of them, the brothers most.

Many hours later, the three woke up, suddenly breathing like a switch was flipped. Many of the Spades were asleep, so Marco was the one to notice the breathing came back. He shook Deuce awake, who sat up immediately and walked to the bedside of the brothers.

"Hey, guys," the doctor said with a smile. "That reset was pretty good, huh?"

Luffy grinned and nodded. "It wasn't scary, I didn't have to see Ace bad," he said cheerfully. He sat up slowly, a bit dizzy but still able to function just fine. Ace and Sabo were agreeing, happy with how it had turned out. None of them had been in pain or awake when everything went south. And they didn't feel any side effects from the drugs, which was another plus.

Thatch got up and asked, "How do you guys feel?" He sounded nervous, and the crew thought he really wasn't in the right mental state to be around them when they reset because of his role in it. Not a direct role, but he was part of the bigger problem. And since he was a main leader on the ship, it made him even more responsible.

Sabo sighed and said, "I feel fine. I mean, exhausted like usual, but not in pain." Ace and Luffy nodded in agreement.

"Do you want food before you go to sleep?"

"Um… not me," Luffy said, and Ace and Sabo agreed. They just wanted to sleep. Even after a non-stressful reset, they were still bone dead tired. "Can we go back to the room?" The Spades nodded and handed Ace and Sabo their changes of shirts. They were clean of blood, and the teens were so grateful for that. When they used to wake up bloody, it had been horrid. Waking up clean made it almost like the nightmare hadn't happened, and anything to give that feeling was greatly appreciated.

The three headed back to their room and collapsed onto their beds, out like a light. Deuce stayed with them just to make sure there were no negative side effects regarding the anesthesia. He would always be there for them, no matter what. It was hard sometimes, but worth it because they meant a lot to Deuce. And the whole crew, but Deuce especially.

He did end up falling asleep as well, leaning against the wall. The room was full of soft snoring, and nothing happened that would be concerning.

-x-

"That went very successfully," Marco said happily once the Spades were out of hearing range. Whitebeard nodded in agreement. Thatch hadn't agreed, and was looking at the floor sadly. The infirmary was being cleaned up and sterilized. Even though they hadn't been coughing or making too much of a mess, blood had still gotten on the floor, the bed frame and the plastic over the beds.

"I'm glad they're leaving," Thatch said suddenly. The other two were surprised at this, since he usually liked the boys and their crew. "I don't think I could stomach knowing that someone on our crew, family, went through something like that and I can't do anything to stop it."

Marco sighed, agreeing while Pops closed his eyes sadly. "They were just not for this crew, I guess. I have never made a mistake like this, in wanting someone to join. And it was a terrible mistake, and I will regret it for the rest of my life."

His two sons said nothing to counter what he'd said, since they both felt the same. "I can't wait for them to leave so they can be happy again," Thatch said quietly, and the three left the infirmary. They would try to get back to the Spades' home as soon as possible.

-x-

"I have a headache," Sabo said while waiting at the bar counter for food to be served. They were all sitting there, Luffy with his jaw resting in his palm as he watched the food cook. He was hungry and wanted to go home. They all wanted to go home. The PoS was waiting for them, and had been confirmed that it was still there and had not been disturbed while they were gone for the couple months.

While they had been happier after knowing they were heading home, being there, surrounded by other people, was exhausting. Especially the brothers, who didn't know when they might reset at a moment's notice. It was scary, the uncertainty they now faced.

But now, they weren't happy anymore. They were impatient and mopey, just wanting this shitty "adventure" to come to an end. Multiple storms were setting them back, and it had been over a week since the last reset, and there had been no more symptoms. But that didn't mean they were comfortable or confident that things would fall back into place and their routine pattern would resume.

Every day, Sabo would go and ask when they ship would be back to that damn island, and they were always given "it depends on the weather". Stupid weather. Stupid Whitebeards. They wished it was over already. The only thing that they actually were glad of concerning the Whitebeards was that they'd help fix up their ship.

They were also in a bad mood since Thatch had started to avoid them. No one said a thing about it, but it really bothered Luffy, and was weighing heavily on his mind. That they were freaks and that's why the only nice guy on the ship didn't want to even talk to them anymore.

The three… hadn't felt like freaks in a long time. They were usually surrounded only by people who supported them. Here, there were only a handful of people who knew, but those who did looked at them nervously, or just averted their gaze every time he saw them.

Luffy felt betrayed, to be honest. And nothing the Spades or his brothers said made him feel any better. He just wanted to go home and try to put this whole nightmare behind him. Go back to being happy with his life, their adventures, their escapades.

"Is your stomach hurting?" Ace asked.

"No. It's just weird, I don't usually get headaches," Sabo replied.

Deuce said, "Don't look at every little pain or ache as signs of a reset. Sometimes people have shitty days." Sabo nodded, knowing that was true. It was just hard not to think of every little pain or discomfort leading to a reset. While the last one had been under anesthesia, it was only because the symptoms took a while to really get bad and trigger the reset.

If it happened suddenly, there was no way to be asleep during it. It would hit them and they would have to go through it again. Again and again with no stop in sight. No end in sight. Usually, that feeling was gone after the reset and they were awake and feeling great. But not on the Moby Dick.

The Moby Dick made them miserable.

Thatch served them the food and then left the room without saying a word. Luffy looked at his food angrily. He didn't want to eat it, so angry at Thatch for betraying them. What, when they were too much of a burden he just ditched them? Yes, Luffy wanted to go home and away from the Whitebeards, but he didn't want life there to get even worse!

"Fucking asshole," Luffy spat, unable to help himself. The Spades looked at him in shock. Luffy never swore, and rarely got angry.

"Lu? What's wrong?" Ace asked. Luffy pushed his plate away. "Oh, Thatch?" The youngest nodded. "Based on what Deuce has told us, he blames himself for everything that's happened while we're on here. He probably feels guilty, and wants to distance himself." Luffy still scowled. That didn't excuse that, he thought.

But his stomach grumbled and so he grudgingly ate, not wanting to enjoy it even though he did. When Thatch came back in later as people started to fill up, Luffy glared at him the whole time he cooked, and it was clear that the chef could feel his gaze, as he looked deeply uncomfortable and nearly burned himself.

"Luffy, let's go," Sabo said, gently pulling Luffy's elbow for him to follow, and the youngest did, still seething and feeling hurt. When they reached the bedroom, Luffy sat on the bed with his arms folded, scowling while looking more like a pout. An angry pout. They sighed, but had no way to make him feel better. They were still over a week away, at least. Fucking storms.

It was even worse when there was a marine attack (the boys stayed inside, no reason to help the Whitebeards in their fight) and the sail was damaged. The pirates had to spend much of the day fixing them and sewing up the tears. The Spades were growing more and more impatient, and now that Thatch had decided he didn't want to engage with them anymore, they hated every Whitebeard now.

Maybe it was unjustified to hate all of them, since some were nice to them, but they were all pieces in the big puzzle that tanked the brothers' already fucked up health issues. They wouldn't ever forgive them for that. If they'd complied, apologized and took the boys back, then maybe they could have been on friendly terms with the yonko crew.

But with how things ended up, they'd be happy to never see any of their faces again.

It was after Thatch showed his dismissal that Luffy was acting up differently than his brothers. He had started needing to use the inhaler that day, the day that Luffy felt betrayed and hurt when he knew he shouldn't. He just thought there was at least one good guy on the crew and now he wasn't anymore.

It got progressively worse as the day went on, and he had needed to sleep to try and turn his emotions off so he could breathe better. But this was also new. There were plenty of times one of the brothers were hurt or angry, but they didn't show any symptoms from that. We're they really that weak that simple emotions would do that to them?

And it didn't help as all three of them were now stressed and all of them were showing symptoms. They refused to leave the room, so Deuce and Jojo did for them. They walked to the galley and kitchen, seeing Thatch there working on dinner. They went to the bar counter and sat down. Thatch didn't acknowledge them.

"You're hurting Luffy's feelings by acting like this," Deuce said, getting straight to the point. Thatch bit his lip, but thankfully didn't ignore them. Jojo automatically went into the kitchen to help cook since Thatch was the only one doing all of the burners and prep.

"It's partly my fault they went through hell like this. I don't want to hurt them anymore," Thatch replied quietly. Deuce felt for him, knowing it had been hard on him especially out of all of the Whitebeards, but it was harming the brothers and that needed to be addressed.

Deuce sighed and said, "You ignoring them has made it worse. Luffy feels betrayed, and the negative feelings gave him symptoms. Now all three of them are stressed about possibly being affected by simple emotions, and they're all showing symptoms now. The best thing you can do for them while we are still trapped here is to be how you were. Friendly but not too pushy. Smile more, how you used to.

"I understand your feelings, but it's only for another week or so, right? Surely you can be friendly for a week," Deuce finished. His tone didn't sound negative or accusing, just simple and seriously. He didn't blame Thatch outwardly, but the man could make the connection that his actions were causing them trouble.

Thatch looked ashamed, and said he'd bring them dinner tonight. Since nobody still knew about their conditions, what happened to them now sporadically, they didn't go to busy places where anyone could see symptoms and freak out or pester them about it, making it worse.

When dinner was made, Thatch got a cart and filled it with food for the brothers and Spades to eat. Though some of the crew were in the galley to eat, most were with the boys. Jojo was taking over Thatch's job and serving the food out on the counter like a buffet table when anything was done cooking.

Deuce knocked on the door before opening wide for Thatch to roll the cart in. The brothers were surprised it was him and sat up. He got glares from Ace and Sabo for upsetting and hurting their little brother.

"I'm sorry my behavior upset you. I just don't want to cause you anymore health problems, and now I did…" Thatch said, sounding absolutely miserable. "It's not personal, I just want to try and make things right. Just to do something to atone for what we've done."

Ace and Sabo's face softened and Luffy looked down at his lap. "You'll help us by being how you used to be. You're the only good one on the crew. We're mad at all of you, but you're the nice one whose been understanding."

Thatch sniffled and said, "I promise I won't ignore you anymore. I have to get back, but I'll bring you some dessert later?" The brothers nodded, smiling despite Ace's nose stuffed with gauze and Sabo sleepy from pain pills and Luffy was wheezing just a bit, but not too bad all things considered.

After that, and after eating, their symptoms left a bit, only leaving them mildly achy. Nothing too bad, and nothing compared to their symptoms. Some aches were not a big deal. Thatch did bring them dessert, chocolate lava cake, which was just amazing. "Jojo, you gotta learn this recipe," Ace commanded as they all shared the large chocolate lava cake.

"You got it, captain," she said, very pleased with the dessert as well. It was a good night, and their symptoms were gone by bed time, and they slept just fine in no pain. It was nice to have a good night's sleep. It was refreshing.