Chapter 2

Olivia Benson hadn't slept in 48 hours. She was beyond exhausted, but she wasn't alone. Fin had been with her every step of the way. Together they had interviewed anyone who could have possible seen or had access to the alley Amanda had been found in. So far they have nothing that stands out. Forensics had their hands full with every camera and piece of evidence that had been recovered from the crime scene. All of it had a rush on it, but still they was waiting on an update.

M.E. Warner had just finished updating the two seasoned detectives on the murdered child that had been uncovered initially at the scene. Waiting on DNA still but the blood type and features indicates the baby girl was Amanda's and around 2 years old. A total of 8 stab wound, all deliberate with no hesitation. It also appeared that an object had been used to traumatize the child's genitals, and the older Doctor indicated it happened after death, which really wasn't much of a relief. The child appeared to have suffered all of her short life. The second child, newborn…fetus…Liv wasn't sure what to refer to her in her own head, besides Amanda's daughter, never had her first breath. The knife had cleanly sliced through Amanda's pelvic wall and uterus and partially through the child. Given the brutality of the 2 year old's body and the massive damage to Amanda, it was determined to be deliberate. Liv chest still ached from the gut wrenching sobs she had alone in her car after the M.E. finished up.

Amanda was on life support. Her body had been severely damaged, a total of 24 stab wounds that started at the top of her head and fell to just above her knees. Most of them 2 to 3 inches deep made with a double edge blade. Some of the wounds appeared to be glancing off of her forearms, and Olivia felt so proud to see that Amanda fought back. The knife did some heavy damage to Amanda's body. Her skull stopped the blade from properly penetrating her brain, so most of her skull flap had been salvageable, and the doctor did not feel a skin graft would be necessary. Her liver had been nicked and had to be partially removed. It appeared to have been a hasty and frenzied murder attempt. She had to have her spleen, gallbladder, appendix, uterus, right ovary and the bottom lobe of her left lung removed due to the internal damage. Her body was severely hypothermic when coming into the emergency department, which actually worked in Amanda's favor. She was extremely malnourished, and her labs indicated that it was likely due to a long term situation. Her ulna and radius as well as her wrist was broken on her left arm. During the CT scans and X-rays the doctors discovered years of old breaks and fractures that had healed some improperly.

That was all in need of immediate care, her skin continued to tell the story. She had wounds scarred all over her body, they appeared to have been burned into her over time and in various stages of healing. Her pale skin had blotches of yellow and purple hand and fist shaped bruises all over it. The one on Amanda's neck drew Liv's attention the most when she was able to see her briefly. The Doctor confirmed that during the pelvic exam they discovered severe vaginal and rectal tearing, with lots of scarring. It was safe to say the three years Amanda had been gone had been torturous on her body. Despite all that her lead surgeon, Dr. Reddy, an older Indian woman that specializes in trauma surgery, felt that Amanda's body would recover, physically barring any unforeseen infection. She also felt that with the right physical therapy and time Amanda would gain all movement and motion again. The pure brutality and damage done to her body was horrid, however the doctor maintained that the human form was made to heal and could recover from these wound, it was the mind we would have to worry about.

Trauma like that was not something you can ignore. Olivia knew a bit about trauma, she'd watch her mother suffer from it her whole life, and she'd been party to it herself when she had went undercover in a prison. Not that Amanda had showed any sign of mental distress at this point. She was heavily sedated, and the doctors were looking at least a week if not two to help her body recover as much as it could. They did brain trauma in the primary motor cortex, but it looked as if it was an old scar, and they was unsure how much it would affect Amanda at this time.

Captain Cragen had grieved when Amanda went missing. He had had grieved so hard that he was set to retire soon. His plan was to have Olivia take on his roll, and had already had her promoted to Sergeant, and had every intention to move her to Lieutenant soon. When Fin told him of the state they found Amanda's body in he had purchased his first bottle of liquor in over 20 years. He hadn't taken drink of it yet, but he also hadn't reach out to his sponsor to stop him. He did however contact Amanda's mother, Beth Anne Rollins, in Georgia.

The southern woman appeared to have been shocked and devastated at the deaths of her grand babies.

"Those babies were innocent! No child should pay for the sins of their parent!" She had drawled and carried on. "I need to give them a Christian burial, and bring them home." The southern woman declined to come to New York, and requested that Captain Cragen make arrangements to have the babies sent to Georgia. "You all need to pay for that as well, I don't see how this situation is any fault of mine and it is the least you can do for poor Manda'."

Donald Cragen assured the woman that he would make and pay for any arrangements once Amanda told him what she wanted.

"I'm those babies next of Kin, with Amanda being unable to decide for them, and I want them here in our family plot. Manda' tell you that herself if she could. I don't need no excuses, this whole situation is your Precinct's fault, ya'll lucky I never sued you when Manda' went missin'. Kim said I'd regret that." She trailed off. "Doesn't matter now, I have a right to those grandbabies and I demand that they are moved here."

The conversation was left open ended. Cragen refused to agree to do anything until he got the DNA back on the children and he spoke to Amanda. He'd had Nick Amaro running ragged covering incoming cases, and he was interviewing a rookie Detective tomorrow for a positon by the name of Dominick Carisi Jr tomorrow. He set heavily in his office chair staring at the bottle in front of him. He was ready to retire, ready to put it all behind him and live in blissful ignorance to the nature of what other humans can do to each other. He just wanted to forget it all.

Fin hand was throbbing. He's punched the wall so hard in that alley that he was sure he fractured his knuckles. Not that he would seek care for it, it was the least he could do is suffer a bit with Amanda. He deserved it, not being there for her when she went missing, and not saving her before she lost her children and was so abused. Like everyone they all assumed the children was probably the perps as well as Amanda's. Knowing Amanda the way he did, he didn't doubt she loved them either way. He hoped Amanda did not witness the loss of her daughter, a baby really…a nameless victim at the moment…stuck in a cold fridge currently. He also prayed she wasn't conscious or aware when her other child was ripped from her. In one moment her ability to bare children and her existing children was just gone. Forcibly and mercilessly she lost them.

He would never recover if he lost Ken, grown man and all. Losing a child just always hit him wrong, every case he had with an abused, damaged or deceased child was one more tic on his life span. He always thanked God for his son, after all they see especially with the bigots in this world, not to mention the racism. He was going to see his Ken tonight, no matter what, he wouldn't be able to rest until he held his son.

Liv had headed back to Bellevue, no way was she going to properly sleep anyhow. She'd rather sit in a waiting room than toss and turn at home. She was going to put monumental effort into sitting with Amanda if she could convince the nurse. She needed to see her, even if the younger woman was covered in tubes and smelled like disinfectant and blood still. She wanted to hold her hand and comfort her, knowing that Amanda was alone, and probably had not been comforted since before she was taken.

"How is Detective Rollins tonight?" Olivia directed her question toward Sara, the nurse currently caring for Amanda.

"Her vitals are holding, her blood pressure is still a little low, and she won't be breathing on her own anytime soon. She has a small fever we are treating with some antibiotics, but I can assure you she is in no physical pain at the moment." Sara patted Liv's hand and saw the anguish in the Detectives eyes. "Would you like to see her?" She glanced around. "It is past visiting hours but if you stay out of the way and are quite you can see her for a few minutes. Please turn off your phone however."

Olivia's heart swelled in gratitude. "Of course, thank you so much." She tried to force a smile, but her lips just didn't want to cooperate, they must be as tired as the rest of her.

The nurse led Olivia toward Amanda's glassed room. "So we can see better." She gestured. "Please wear this gown, face mask, and gloves, no need to make a risk of infection worse." She handed the items to Olivia.

The brunette nodded. "Thank you." She croaked as she put on the protective gear.

The nurse nodded in understanding and reminded Olivia that she could only stay 15 minutes before turning and leaving.

Olivia crossed into the room, her eyes getting impossibly bigger at the site of Amanda. How could someone hurt another person with such ruthlessness? The thin blonde was swallowed by the tubing, and NG tube in her nose for nourishment, a breathing tube to a vent in her throat. Her eyes was taped shut and had a metal protective eye guard over them. Debris had caused some damage to her cornea and an Ophthalmologist was treating it. Her hair still had blood and dirt in it, and her lips was cracked and swollen. She had a chest tube and a drain going out her side. A catheter and due to some nicked bowel from one of the stab wounds and a loop colostomy that required a bag for now. Olivia didn't know where she could even touch Amanda. She had two IV's going in her undamaged arm. The other was hanging to reduce swelling and position it for a cast soon.

Olivia reached her hand and wrapped it around Amanda's cold pale one. She tenderly squeezed not wanting to cause any pulling or discomfort. Tears pooled in her eyes and she blubbered a bit as she spoke two the unconscious woman.

"I promise Amanda, I'll find who did this to you…I'll never let you get hurt again." Her hand tightened a bit a desperate attempt at being closer to Amanda. She didn't think she could ever let her hand go.