Ibiki marches back into the T&I department. All is chaos. Ibiki grabs one of his minions by the collar and demands, "What is going on here?"
"The prisoner committed suicide, sir!" panics the underling.
Ibiki swears. "We still needed more information out of him!"
"Sir, he must've been hiding something else!"
"I am aware of that!" snaps Ibiki. There goes part of the plan. "Examine the body to find out exactly how he did it, then dispose of the prisoner quietly. Tell NO ONE we got information out of him."
"Yes sir!" The underling bows and scampers off to do Ibiki's bidding.
What important secret was the prisoner still hiding?
"No, really," Madoka says, as Team Seven hurries towards the tower on the second day inside the Forest of Death. "Those mushrooms are poisonous. It's a wonder you aren't dieing, Naruto."
"But I've eaten these kind of mushrooms before!" Protests Naruto. "They taste great, and the worst I've ever gotten from them is a tummy ache!"
"Naruto, that's not normal," says Madoka.
"I'll tell your Grandma you eat poisonous mushrooms if you don't stop eating them," says Sasuke, eying Naruto's handful of Destroying Angel mushrooms. "The fact they are poisonous is in the name, for goodness sake!"
"But angels can't be bad!" protests Naruto, putting another one in his mouth.
"DON'T EAT THAT!" yells Madoka, slapping Naruto's hand away from his mouth and sending the mushrooms flying. "SPIT IT OUT!" Madoka tries to force Naruto to spit out the mushrooms, but Naruto swollows them.
"I am telling your grandparents!" says Sasuke.
"If you do that I'll tell Kakashi sensei you are the one who stole his book!" snaps Naruto, who is still functioning - for now, at least.
"If you do that, I'll tell your grandma about the sexy jutsu!"
"If you do that, I'll tell your dad you aren't wearing your tights in the Forest!"
"It's hot in the Forest! I don't need them!"
"You wanna flash your panties to the enemy?!"
"I have shorts on! And so what if I do?"
Sasuke and Naruto are glaring right in each other's faces now. Madoka notices they are all under a genjutsu. He breaks the genjutsu.
"GRRR!" Naruto and Sasuke growl at each other, their arms crossed and their foreheads pressed together.
Three Rain genin in light blue camouflage jumpsuits appear out of the trees. One has two eyes, one has one eye and one has no eyes. Madoka wonders if they have terrible aim. Well, they are wearing bandages over their eyes, and they each have one, two or no eyes covered. Madoka knows just how to deal with them. He has been learning torture genjutsu from Kakashi sensei. He is about to cast one, when one of the Rain genin throws a kunai at him. Madoka wonders how the guy with both eyes covered can see well enough to aim. Must be an oversight on the team's part to let the guy with no eyes handle the projectile weapons. Madoka dodges backwards, accidently bumping Naruto, who is still glaring at Sasuke. Then Madoka casts his genjutsu and the three Rain genin fall to the ground screaming. Madoka searches them for their scroll, takes it and turns around.
Sasuke and Naruto are lying on the ground as a result of Madoka bumping Naruto. Naruto is on top of Sasuke and their lips are locked together. Madoka can see up Sasuke's dress. He blushes and looks away. "Sasuke, you liar!" says Madoka. "You aren't wearing shorts!"
Sasuke pushes Naruto off herself and jumps up and pulling her skirt down, turning very red. "I am!" she says defensively. "They ride up!"
"GROSS!" Naruto holds his throat and coughs. "I need to wash my mouth out!"
"Same!" says Sasuke, shuddering.
Madoka raises an eyebrow. He knows what he saw, and Madoka must draw the line. "Sasuke, Naruto," he says sternly. "We are going to find a river so you two can wash your mouths out. Sasuke, when we get there, you are to put your tights back on or I WILL tell your parents."
Naruto jumps up and runs off in a random directions yelling, "RIVER! COME TO ME! I NEED YOU!"
Sasuke follows Naruto at a more dignified pace, still trying to pull her skirt down, but at the sides now. Her face is still bright red. Madoka follows so as not to lose them.
About an hour later, Team Seven sets off for the tower again. Naruto and Sasuke each used an entire bar of Naruto's stash of soap to clean themselves. Naruto's Grandmother provided said soap. Sasuke also tried to clean the stains out of her tights, but failed and is wearing grass stained tights, because she didn't think to bring spares.
"Alright you two," says Madoka to his subdued teammates. "Let me make one thing clear: we will never speak of this again."
It is a very quiet Team Seven that arrives at the tower late on the second day of Round Two of the Chunin Exam. As they arrive at the tower, Naruto sees a familiar face. "Kabuto!" he calls, waving happily. "Do you have your scrolls?"
"No," says Kabuto. "We are actually looking to trap teams that have a full set to steal it. Do you have an extra Heaven scroll, by any chance?"
"Madoka, give him our extra Heaven scroll," says Naruto.
Madoka pulls out the scroll they took from the Rain genins earlier that day and gives it to Kabuto. "You better become a chunin this time," say Madoka.
"Thank you," says Kabuto, smiling. "I will do my best. Good luck to you."
The two teams enter the tower and see a hall full of doors with seals on them, some broken and some unbroken. A sign on the wall says each team must enter a different room. The two teams follow these instructions.
Naruto and his friends find themselves in a bare room with a poster on the wall. The three genin read the poster and stare at eachother in confusion.
"I don't get it," says Naruto. "Grandpa Third signed it, no wonder it's so hard to understand." Naruto crosses his arms and narrows his eyes at the poster.
"What's up with the blank space," wonders Madoka, his nerd brain trying to figure it all out. Naruto waits for Madoka to nerd up the answer. Finally, Madoka says, "I think it means we should open the scrolls at the same time."
"Okay!" agrees Naruto, trusting Madoka's nerd brain. He pulls out all the scrolls, gaining a squeal from Sasuke when he digs into her pouch and a slap from Madoka when he digs into his pouch. Once he has all three scrolls, Naruto opens them face up on the floor.
A seal is revealed, however nothing happens. There are too many components. Oh right - they only need two scrolls. Naruto takes out one of the Earth scrolls and waits to see what he is summoning.
There is a poof of smoke and Iruka niisan appears. Naruto leaps forward and wraps himself around Iruka niisan. "Iruka niisan! I used your barrier against some of our enemies! It's awesome!"
"Wait, that was Iruka sensei's jutsu?" asks Madoka, his mouth hanging open.
"Yes," says Naruto, grinning.
"Which barrier are you talking about?" asks Iruka niisan, curiously. "I've taught you more than one."
"The Crimson Lion Barrier," replies Naruto.
Iruka niisan opens his mouth then snaps it shut again. "Don't you think that was a little...overkill?" he asks nervously.
"Why?" asks Naruto, cocking his head to one side in confusion. "It did the job."
"Naruto," Iruka scratches his nose and blushes. "That is currently the strongest barrier seal in existence."
"I thought the strongest barrier seal was the Four Crimson Ray Formation," says Madoka nerdily.
"It was," says Iruka, rubbing at his nose scar. "But I adapted it for use by one person and improved its strength and efficiency, thus creating the the Crimson Lion Barrier."
Naruto knows all this of course, but he turns to look at his teammates to see what they think. Madoka's mouth is hanging open and he is pointing at Iruka niisan. Sasuke's eyes are as wide as dinner plate and she is making unintelligible noises.
Iruka niisan is still blushing.
"You...you're...what?...how?" Madoka stammers, shaking a bit. "Who are you?"
"I am the last member of the ancient and noble Umino clan, the greatest masters of fuuinjutsu aside from the noble clan Uzumaki."
"But they're WHIRLPOOL clans!" shouts Madoka.
"Have you never paid any attention to Iruka niisan's clan name, dattebayo?" asks Naruto.
Madoka stares at Naruto. "YOU! YOU! YOU'RE AN UZUMAKI! YOU'RE FROM A WHIRLPOOL CLAN!"
"Why are you so surprised?" asks Naruto. "Karin is one too. Infact, her mum was Iruka's Dad's apprentice, and Iruka niisan and Karin's Mum are the last living people who were actually born in the Whirlpool. They're probably the last full bloods as well." Naruto shrugs. He can't understand why this is such a big deal.
"Naruto," says Iruka niisan seriously. "Please don't go around telling people we are part of the Hidden Whirlpool's founding clans. Things could get ugly."
"Yes niisan," says Naruto. "So how come you're here?"
Iruka niisan smiles and says, "I'm here to tell you three that you have passed the Second Round of the Exams."
"YAY!" Naruto lets go of Iruka niisan and runs around the room with his hands in the air. "We made it to the finals, 'tebayo!"
"What would have happened if we had opened the scrolls before we reached the tower, Iruka sensei?" asks Sasuke, quietly.
"I would have come out in all my terrifying glory and removed you from the exam," says Iruka niisan. "How I would have done so is my secret."
"What's that poster about?" asks Madoka, pointing up at the poster on the wall.
"Oh that?" says Iruka, turning to look at it. "Heaven is the mind, Earth is the body. The poster is basically telling you to train in the area you lack. For example, Madoka is mostly brains and Naruto is mostly brawn, therefore Naruto should train his mind and Madoka should train his body, then they will be smart and strong like Sasuke. Or me. The missing word is 'Jin', which means 'one person' and 'all people'. Yes, it is hard to grasp, but this is the chunin derivative set down by the Third Hokage. Remember it - so long as you follow it, theoretically, you will be able to do any mission. Naruto," Iruka turns to Naruto. "The poster means the same thing I taught you for the Advanced test."
"I ensured all Cloud teams were knocked out like you ordered," says Kabuto.
"Good," says Orochimaru, taking the proffered NInja Info Card. "What is this?"
"Information on the Leaf's jinchuuriki, Lady Orochimaru," says Kabuto. "He passed the Second Round."
"Good," smiles Orochimaru, and shunishins away.