"I'll be back. I just need some time alone." The swordsman says, his words casting a protective spell that keeps Sanji from his impending breakdown.
Sanji knows there's no use talking Zoro out of his need for solitude when he says he needs it, but the blond tries anyway, by throwing some inconsequential excuse at the man. The door clicks shut, and soon the all too familiar silence starts to close in on him.
"He'll be back. He said he'll be back." Sanji whispers to himself, trying to fend it off, but the invisible force envelopes him and starts clawing at his gut despite his efforts. It's like disappearing from the inside, a physical void starting from the heart and corroding its way outwards. The lungs, the stomach, the liver, the intestines, the bones, and the limbs, until he is sure he is just a head hanging in mid air. He fights the urge to curl up into a ball like he used to do many years ago.
Exhaling the last shaky breath of smoke, if only to make sure his lungs still exist, Sanji throws on an outfit, looks through his contact list, and calls the first person who might answer at this hour.
"So... let me get this straight." Nami twirls a lock of long ginger hair around her finger. "You, Sanji-kun the hopeless romantic, are out here alone destroying someone else's Valentine's Day plans because... you deleted a chat log from your own phone, and Zoro's mad at you for it."
Sanji gives her a small apologetic smile around his cigarette. He knew he would be chain smoking tonight, which is why he asked for a table in the far corner of the second floor patio, right by the railing overlooking the almost deserted street corner below. It's now almost midnight, and the February air is turning a bit chilly with a steady drizzle just beyond the roof above. Zoro is no doubt drenched in rain and aimlessly wandering one of these dark empty streets, but that's where he would rather be for now. Lost, and away from Sanji.
"Sorry Nami-san, I guess I wasn't thinking when I called." It completely escaped Sanji's panicked mind, when he dialed Usopp's number, that the long nose is no longer single. Sanji was the one who helped the man plan his confession to this other ex-girlfriend of the cook's just last month on New Year's Day.
"Good, so we agree that it's your treat today." Nami taps her glass on his. "I still don't get it though. Was Zoro planning on checking your phone?"
"No. He never does." Sanji answers absently. He's only half listening, but infinitely grateful for the couple's talkative nature that's helping him keep the silence at bay.
"Let's just cover the basics here." The long nose drums his fingers on his glass. "Were you cheating on Zoro? Purposely leading the woman on? Keeping your relationship status hidden so you can enjoy the attention you get from her?"
Sanji sends him a glare that would've made him cower in his seat a few years back, but today he merely backtracks.
"'K my bad. Stupid question. I know. You and Zoro. Soulmates." Usopp gives the blond a few exaggerated nods of agreement, earning himself a kick under the table. "But exactly what were you two talking about that had to be deleted?"
"It was all normal conversation until one day she... uh... said she can't-... she can't get-... she still has feelings for me."
"Ahh, I see." Nami nods. "So you firmly told her that it's not gonna happen and blocked and deleted her."
"Or," Usopp leans forward, "you told her how happy you are in your current relationship and she should stop bothering you."
The suggestions makes Sanji cringe.
"I... don't think I can call myself a decent human being if I did either of those things to a girl who's laying her bleeding heart in my path."
The red head shares a look with long nose.
"So what did you do instead?" Usopp frowns.
"Tried to talk her out of it." Sanji taps his cigarette over the ashtray. "By telling her how amazing she is as a person, how I'm not worthy of her affections, and how one day she'll find someone who will treat her the way she deserves."
"It worked?" Nami sounds unimpressed.
"No... She insisted she'll never meet anyone who sees her the way I do, so I told her I'll be around if she needs someone to talk to." The cook gives a defeated huff.
The pair stare at the blond for a second before turning to each other in a perfectly audible whisper.
"Now I get why Zoro is mad. I thought he's the jealous type." Nami leans into Usopp's ear.
"Right? I feel sorry for Zoro sometimes. He's the textbook definition of the jealous type." Usopp cups his mouth with a hand.
"So how did they manage to stay together for so long?"
"Iono," Usopp shrugs, "true love? Or pure luck?"
"Knock it off, you two! I'm right here, and I can hear you just fine." Sanji snaps, drawing a round of snickers from the two.
"Alright, this... soulmate of yours, where IS he right now?" Nami crosses her arms, signaling the start of an interrogation and clearly having too much fun.
Sanji's heart sinks at the question. He nods at the rain.
"Out there, probably lost on a street corner somewhere."
"Does he still not know that you can't be left alone after an argument?" Usopp matches Nami's posture and thinly veiled amusement.
"Well I haven't told him directly..."
"Come on, it's Zoro! If you don't tell him directly. He. Does. Not. Know."
"I know that, but he needs to be alone. That's just how..."
Sanji looks up to find that the two are no longer paying attention to him. Usopp holds out his phone and shares a look of agreement with his girlfriend before dailing.
"What... are you doing?"
"Checking up on him and offering our sympathy for putting up with you." Nami gives him a sideways glance.
"Wait, whose side are you on?"
"Yours, which is why we'll also explain to him why you're always with friends after every fight." Usopp holds up his phone.
Soon Sanji's pant pocket starts to vibrate. He digs out Zoro's ringing phone and throws it on the table. The two eye the device in frustration before hanging up.
"As I was saying, Zoro needs time alone when he's upset. That's how he processes shit. He can't think straight when there's noise, just like how I can't think straight when I'm alone."
It's one of the few things he knows for sure that Zoro needs, one of the man's rituals, so he'll defend it if he has to.
Now that he has their eyes on him, the air around the table becomes noticeably heavier. None of them move a muscle for a long moment.
"Sanji-kun," Nami slowly opens her mouth, "have you ever considered the possibility that this soulmate of yours is... not that compatible with you?"
Sanji feels his facial muscles twist involuntarily at the question.
"Oi Nami," Usopp pulls at the redhead's arm, "we're not going there."
"Why not?" Nami whispers back.
"Because, he's gonna kick our faces in."
"No he won't." Nami rolls her eyes.
"He'll kick my face in." Usopp corrects, and Nami inhales in understanding.
"K, fine. You go get us another round of drinks." The redhead commands.
"Roger." Usopp stands to give a quick salute and dashes to the swinging door to the bar.
"Take your time. I've got this." Nami waves, and the long nose gives her a thumbs up without looking back.
Nami turns back to the blond, but before she can continue, she's interrupted by a string of sneezes. Sanji puts out his cigarette, takes off his jacket, and wraps it over her spaghetti strapped shoulders in a series of reflexive motions, pulling her trapped long hair over the back collar with practiced ease that he's surprised to find that he still has.
He knows what Nami is saying. In fact, he used to think the same way up until a year or two ago, that sustaining a relationship is a matter of compatibility. He has had enough relationships to know just how difficult it is to find someone who is "compatible", and for years he believed that all relationships are doomed to end the same way. Sooner or later, the two involved would come to the conclusion that they're not compatible in this way or that. The fact that some relationships seem to be going strong is only because they haven't found these incompatibilities yet. It's only a matter of time.
That's how his relationship with Nami ended too. They were incompatible because handled their wealth differently. That was all the reason they had, or needed, for a breakup.
"Nami-san, I think we both had it wrong. It's never about compatibility because it's not about how easy your life can be with them. It's about whether they're worth all the shit they put you through."
"And Zoro's worth it?" Nami asks quietly.
That is not even a question in the cook's mind. If anything, he has put the moss head through more shit than the other way around. Nothing ever feels like a burden if it's for Zoro, but the idiot is always holding himself back from making demands of any kind. If he would just tell Sanji not to talk to any exes, or anyone other than the marimo himself, his words alone would give Sanji the strength to get it done. But the blond has long accepted the fact that Zoro would never ask that, or anything, of him.
"Well, he makes me shit covered strawberries on Valentine's Day." Sanji says instead, not bothering to fight the goofy smile making its way up his face as he sits back in his chair.
Nami nods, putting on a smile with downcast eyes.
"That I never did." She chuckles. Sanji is thankful that she's not pursuing the subject further. Maybe things wouldn't have ended between them if Sanji knew what he knows now, but they both understand that the moment to explore that possibility passed years ago.
"Is... this a good time to be back? Or should I make a trip to the bathroom now?" Usopp slides three new glasses onto the table.
"Do you like shit covered strawberries by any chance?" Nami pats the empty seat in reply.
"I don't want to know why you're asking that." The long nose makes a face of disgust. "Oh, and Sanji, is it bad that on my way back here I saw Zoro on the street glaring in this direction and then leaving?"
The three of them stare at each other for a few seconds as Sanji curses under his breath, realizing what it must've looked like to the moss head without Usopp at the table. Having the idiot think he asked another ex out for a drink after that argument might just be the death of him.
"Why didn't you say that first? Which way did he go?" Sanji stands up and gathers his cigarette pack and Zoro's phone.
"Down 5th Avenue, but you know how he is with roads."
"Sorry Nami-san. It looks like I'll have to treat you next time."
"It's gonna cost you," the redhead pauses, sounding a tad worried, "but do you have a plan?"
"Find him, and..." Sanji bites his lower lip and offers her a small smile, "and make myself worth it."
"Go get him, girl!" Nami holds up his jacket as he walks past her.
Sanji gives the couple a last wave before throwing his legs over the second floor railing and making the jump onto the wet street below.
Guesswork will always be part of the job with the marimo, but one way or another he'll find the lost idiot and salvage this Valentine's Night that he managed to mess up twice.
A/N:
Just so you know, this IS the end. I'm better at creating problems than solving them, so this is the closest to a resolution you'll get with this story. I tried. I'm sorry.