[[A/N: Hello my lovely readers! Hope all is well where you are. I know it's been a couple of weeks but, I did warn you that it would probably be longer between update periods. Also, here's another warning: Sweet Jax is not in this chapter. In fact, I kind of made him an asshole. For that, I do apologize. However, he will return in the next chapter. I mean, I can't just have him and Charlie suddenly get together and everything be perfect. Otherwise there isn't much of a story. Don't worry. They are end game but it will take a lot of lessons for Jax to get there. Let's face it, he can be kind of dumb as we all can when it comes to love. Stick with me, though. It will all work out in the end. ;) That being said, I hope you enjoy this chapter. If you do, I'd love to hear about it. If you don't, I'd love to hear about it. Basically, no matter how you feel about it, I wanna know. Also, I apologize for any typos I may have missed. Until the next chapter...happy reading!]]

If It's Good For the Gander

—Charlie—

~Three Weeks Later~

Jax never brought up the kiss. But to be fair, neither had I and we had been together pretty much every day since. He had gone to the clubhouse a handful of times but he rarely left my side. I greatly enjoyed his company and was grateful for everything he did…but if I was being honest, I needed a break. Not from him, but from my house. I needed to get out and live my life again. It was also starting to seem like he felt as if he was obligated to be around me. At least, that's what I was afraid because he was starting to get snippy. The perfect opportunity to get out arose when one of the other Sons of Anarchy charters were riding into Charming. A party at the clubhouse was already in preparation. He was sitting on the couch, watching some stupid crime show, when I left my room that morning.

"There's coffee in the pot if you want some. It's fresh."

"Thanks," I muttered and trudged my way to the kitchen. Once I'd fixed my coffee, I went to sit next to him on the couch. "What time did you wake up?"

"About four-thirty," he said, keeping his eyes on the TV. A glance at the clock told me it was nine in the morning. I frowned.

"Why so early?"

"Couldn't sleep. Came out here because I didn't want to wake you."

"Oh, okay. I'm sorry." He gave me a weird look.

"No need to be sorry. Not anything to do with you."

"I know. I just…I don't know."

"Listen, I was waiting until you woke up. I'm gonna take off." He sat up and started putting on his shoes. He was acting strangely…cold toward me. It made me unsure how I should act in return.

"You are?"

"Oregon charter comes in tonight, remember? I have to be there." The way he said it made me realize he was sugar-coating it. I scoffed.

"You don't have to say it that way, Jax."

"Say what, what way?"

"You can just say you want to be there. You don't have to spare my feelings."

"I'm not sparing your feelings. I do have to be there. I also want to be there. It's a huge club party so, I will probably not be back."

"Oh. Well, so long as we understand each other." I refrained from asking what I really wanted to ask. Would he be coming back at all? I bit my lip at the thought. Without him, my house was empty and lonely. My dad was rarely around and Opie and Donna had gotten an apartment. "Can I come to the party?"

"I don't think you should. It's not really your thing."

"But I-"

"No," he snapped at me as he slipped his cut onto his shoulders. "You should stay home."

"Yeah, you're right, I guess. I'll see if Donna wants to hang out."

"Donna will probably be Opie at the clubhouse tonight."

"Then why can't I go?"

"You're not a crow eater or an old lady."

"But-"

"Charlie, just do as your told and stay home."

I bit my lip again to hold back tears. "Why are you snapping at me?"

"Because I'm trying to leave and you keep badgering me. It's getting on my nerves."

"Then leave," I said, anger coloring my tone. "No one is making you stay here."

"Fuck, here we go," he muttered. I sighed, trying to control all the emotions slamming me at once.

"Just go, Jax. I don't want to fight with you."

"Good. I'm out then. And I don't want to see you at the club later." He slammed the door behind him and I jumped. I didn't know what happened but, after the last few weeks, I was surprised he spoke to me as he did. I hoped it was just cabin fever or something. Maybe sleep deprivation. I couldn't bear the thought that it might have everything to do with the fact that he was just that sick of me. Before I could stop them, tears ran down my face and a sob escaped me, echoing off the walls of my lonely living room.

—Jax—

I started my bike and sat for a minute, mentally kicking my own ass for how I talked to her. It wasn't her fault I was horny as hell and needed to get laid. It wasn't her fault, not entirely, that I hadn't slept well the last few nights. It wasn't her fault I wanted her so bad I could barely stand it. I could see she felt the same way, sensed it when she looked at me, but it was way too soon after what she'd been through. None of that gave me the right to speak to her as I had. I pulled out my cell and called a familiar number.

"Hello?" she answered after the third ring.

"Hey Donna."

"Hey Jax! What's going on? How's Charlie?"

"Well, she is likely upset because I was such a dick to her a little bit ago."

"What did you do, Jax?"

"It doesn't matter. Look, can you come hang out with her for a while. I'd go back but I have club shit I have to do today."

"Okay but, I'm supposed to with Opie to the party tonight. You want me to just leave her?"

"I told her not to come but, if she really wants to, bring her with you? I don't want her to be stuck by herself."

"But you also don't want her to see you with all those crow eaters," she said knowingly. I sighed, knowing she was right.

"She's seen me with crow-eaters before, Donna."

"Yeah, but not since things have started to change between you two."

"What are you talk-"

"Save it, Jax. We've all noticed there is something going on with you and Charlie. You may not know what it is yet but, there is definitely something real happening."

"Well maybe not now that I went acting like such an asshole."

"Oh, she won't be upset after she learns why."

"What do you mean?"

"Please! I mean how you guys get when you haven't gotten laid in a while."

"Shit, Donna. I-"

"It's no big deal. She'll understand. I'll talk to her."

"No, I'll do it. I shouldn't have spoken to her like I did. Especially over something so shallow."

"Fine. I'll head to her house and visit her. Since you've been hogging all her time."

"You could have come over. I just don't like leaving her."

"And she doesn't like you leaving."

"Jesus, I really fucked up, didn't I?"

"It's fixable, Jax. Don't worry. You'll be able to apologize. I'll bring her with me tonight."

"She may not want to come after the shit I said."

"Leave it to me. Laters!" She hung up before I could respond and I put my phone away. I didn't know how but I certainly hoped I could somehow make it right with Charlie. In seconds, I took off, riding straight for the clubhouse. The Oregon Charter was set to arrive by noon.

—Charlie—

After half an hour of a good cry in the shower, I felt better but still upset with how Jax and I left things. I knew he had to be at the clubhouse to welcome the Oregon charter so I'd decided to leave it alone until after the party. I'd just gotten out of the shower when a rapid knocking alerted me someone was at my front door. I cautiously made my way through my living room, not expecting anyone to come by, and exhaled in annoyed relief that Donna was the one knocking.

"What are you doing here?" I asked her as I opened the door, sounding more annoyed than I'd intended. Her smile faded a bit.

"Well, hello to you too." I loved out of the way and waved her inside, closing the door behind her.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to sound so bitchy. I just wasn't expecting you."

"Oh, I should have called. I know you're still…well, still nervous after what happened."

"Yeah," I said and we both sat in the couch in the living room. "So, what brings you by? Don't you have to get ready for the party at the clubhouse?"

"Well, Jax called me, honey."

"When?"

"About half an hour ago. Said he was a real dick to you. He hated leaving you alone so, he called me."

"I don't need a babysitter, Donna. If Jax is sick of me, I can handle being alone."

"Girl, he's not sick of you. He's just a guy."

"Is that supposed to mean something to me?"

"Well, it will when I explain. Guys are still guys no matter how sweet they can be."

"So, that means he can be an asshole for no reason?"

"In a manner of speaking."

"See, I don't know what that means."

"Jax, like all the men in the club, are used to getting laid on a regular, if not daily, basis. He's also the hottest member of the club so, he's not lacking in pussy."

"Okay, so why are you telling me all this? I already know that shit."

"He's been with you for three weeks. He's not been at the club partaking in the constant overflow of bitches who would do anything to suck his dick."

"That's not my fault!" I felt my face heat up. I didn't make him stay with me.

"No one is saying it is, Charlie. I know he wants to be here with you. If he didn't, he wouldn't be. What I'm saying is he is horny as hell and sometimes, that can make a man extremely frustrated. Especially someone who fucks around as much as Jax does." I felt like a light bulb lit up in my brain and I got hit with the 'stupid' stick at the same time.

"Oh…oh! That's the reason he was such an ass?"

"I don't think he meant to act that way but, you know he doesn't have the best control when he's irritable."

"Well, who does? You sure it's not personal? That he's not really just sick of me?"

"No. If I were to make a guess, I think the reason he's extra irritable is that he's starting to see you in a new light."

"I don't know what that means either."

"I think he wants you but he can't act on it. And sleeping next to you every night isn't making it easy on him."

"He woke up really early today."

She shrugged and said, "I don't know that it's any indicator now do I know with complete certainty that it's true but, I think it's you he wants."

"I don't know," I said, not wanting to let what she said sink in. I didn't need that kind of hope only for it to slap me in the face.

"Neither do I, honestly. What are you wearing to the party?"

"I'm not going to the party. Jax said he didn't want me there."

"That's not what he said. He doesn't want you to see him with crow-eaters tonight."

"That's what he said?"

"Yes and no. I called him out on it and he didn't correct me. We all see there is something going on with you two."

"But is there? We haven't talked about anything like that."

"Probably because of what happened."

"It seems to be the catalyst for everything," I muttered and rubbed my face. I took my hair out of the towel I'd wrapped it in and it fell in a huge mess down my back.

"Maybe. And since you haven't talked about anything, if you go tonight you will see him with crow-eaters. You should be prepared for that."

"I've seen him with pass-arounds before, Donna."

"Yes but, not since-"

"Since what? Since nothing?"

"Well, regardless of what happens at the party, he's probably going to come back here."

"Probably not until tomorrow afternoon. I don't look for him to come back tonight. He will probably get too drunk."

"Maybe that's what you need."

"What?"

"To get drunk. To have some fun."

"You think?"

"Yeah! Let's go to the mall and get you something new to wear. Something that screams 'biker bitch' to the club. Especially the Oregon charter. I bet they have some cute guy who you can flirt with, make Jax jealous."

"Donna, I don't know. I don't want to make him jealous. I don't-"

"Oh, come on Debbie Downer," she said and pulled me to my feet. "It's just a little bit of fun. What could it hurt?"

I hesitated, then shrugged. She had a point. "I guess you're right. Let me change into not-pajamas and we'll go shopping."

"Sure thing!"

I went into my room and dressed quickly. I would be lying if I said I wasn't excited, if a bit nervous, about my first real outing since my attack. It would be good to get in some girl time with my brother's girlfriend but, being anywhere without Jax made me hesitant. I wasn't so sure if trying to make him jealous was a good idea…or even if it was possible. He and I hadn't discussed anything regarding what we may or may not be feeling.

We didn't stay at the mall too long. A couple of trendy clothing stores and one trip to the MAC counter later, we were heading back to my house after grabbing a burger. Donna didn't stick around long after we got back because she had to get ready herself. She told me before she left that I should look for her to pick me up for the party. I busied myself by changing into my new outfit. When I putting on the new make-up I'd bought, I got distracted by the lingering bruises on my neck and cheek. I traced the fading lines, flashes of memories playing themselves out before my eyes until I squeezed them shut. My heart started racing, my breathing accelerated, and I felt a cold sweat cover me. After forcing myself to take a few deep breaths, I was able to push back what was building and finish applying my make-up. When I'd finished, it was impossible to tell I had any lingering bruises at all.

I had to admit, after I was ready to leave, I looked decent enough…for an MC party. My hair hung freely down my back and my make-up was perfectly done. My new black jeans were form fitting but flared at the bottom so I could wear my black heeled leather boots. My top was sleeveless and a mixture of lace and leather that accentuated my assets better than any other top I owned. I looked every part a biker bitch and knew I would fit in perfectly…and yet, the words of two asshole police officers rang in my head. I imagined this is what they assumed I was wearing to entice Jeremy Davis to rape me and I couldn't help but wonder if they were right.

Before I had the chance to change into something more modest, even though I wore stuff like this the few times I went to a club party and none of the guys would think anything of it, a knock on the door got my attention. Donna, dressed similarly to my, waited for me as I grabbed my purse and my leather jacket in the event I got cold. Her eyes widened when she got a good look at me.

"What?"

"Charlie, you look amazing. You look like-"

"Like a crow-eater?" My voice was quiet as the fear of looking like one of them showed itself.

"No. You look like an Old Lady."

"Well, that does it. I have to change," I said and turned to open my door again but her hand on my arm stopped me.

"Don't you dare. You look hot and trust me, you want Jax to see you this way."

"He has seen me dressed like this."

"But not since things have changed."

"I feel like I shouldn't wear it."

"But you should. Besides, you don't have time to change. We need to go. I told Opie I'd be there by six."

I had nothing left to argue about even though I couldn't shake the uneasy feeling building in me. It wasn't a long ride to the clubhouse and we spent the time in the car jamming out to the radio. When she pulled into the parking lot, I was stunned by the number of bikes I saw lining the building. Even over the music in the car, I could hear the music thumping outside. She parked and we got out of the car, meeting in front so we could walk together. I hadn't seen so many Reaper patches in a long time and yet, in a sea of bikers, I instantly found Jax. He was sitting with Opie and couple of the guys from the Oregon charter and they were laughing. Donna, catching sight of my brother, walked quickly to him. I hung back, remembering the last time I was in the club, things didn't end well. Besides, the last thing I was going to do was interrupt Jax again. Although, I didn't see any crow-eaters near him yet, they were hovering close enough that I knew better than to just make my way to him. He saw Donna as she closed the distance between her and Opie and he looked up to search the crowd. His eyes widened when they landed on me and I felt my face heat up. However, he didn't look pleased at what he saw. He looked angry. He stood, ignoring the rest of the bikers, and made his way to me.

"Hey Jax," I said quietly when he stopped in front of me.

"What are you wearing?" I looked down at myself and frowned.

"Clothes? What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean."

"I don't, actually. I've worn clothes like this before. What's wrong with them?"

"You look like a crow-eater, Charlie." His words settled over me and I felt like I'd been stabbed. I knew I didn't really look like one. I knew I wouldn't act like one, and I knew he couldn't have known it was a fear of mine after all I'd gone through. But to hear him say it caused a rebellious wave to swell within me. Who the hell did he think he was?

"Excuse me but, I already have a daddy and his name ain't Jax."

"I told you to stay home."

"You told Donna to bring me tonight. So, which is it?" He sighed and I saw the weariness on his face but, his attitude still pissed me off.

"I did tell her to bring you but, I didn't think you would come dressed like this. The Oregon charter is here."

"Yes, I know that. It's been mentioned about a thousand times. Who cares if they're here? I came dressed like this because it's a motorcycle club party. I didn't think wearing sweatpants or church clothes would be the best idea."

"But they know nothing of what happened to you. They won't even remember you're a First Nine's daughter, Charlie. To them, you may as well be another crow-eater."

"I don't give a shit about their opinion. They don't need to know what happened to me." I didn't want to tell him it was his opinion of me that mattered the most because I was too scared to know what it was.

"Do you have to have an answer for everything I say?" He growled his question and I saw his anger building. I gave him a wicked grin.

"Yes. You are being ridiculous Jax. Why can't I wear clothes like this?"

"Because!" He looked me over once again and that's when I saw it. That same spark of desire I saw the day they took care of Jeremy. "You know what? Do what you want. I'm gettin' a beer."

He stalked away from me, tense anger in every step. Everything Donna said may or may not have been true but, I knew he wouldn't do anything about it if he felt anything. Not any time soon. I rubbed my hands down my cheeks, frustrated that we hadn't worked out anything but rather we'd continued fighting. His demanding, nasty attitude made it seem more like he was sick of my presence and convinced me Donna's theory incorrect.

He grabbed his beer and as he took a long swig, a blonde crow-eater made her way to him and started rubbing his arm. The anger he felt at me drained from his face and his pantie-dropping smile grew, my heart sinking further the wide it got. When he cast a sideways glance at me then threw an arm around her, I couldn't tell if his reason was to hurt me or piss me off further but, he successfully did both. It took everything in me to not burst into tears. I searched the crowd and found Donna and Opie already all over each other. I wasn't surprised but, I wished I'd have brought my own car so I could leave. Deciding to suck it up, I pointedly ignored Jax and the crow-eater as I made my way inside to the bar and sat on a vacant stool.

"Hey Doll!" Darla, the bartender, said from behind the counter. "I ain't seen ya in a while, Sugar. How you feelin'?" That question alone told me she knew what happened.

"I'm fine, Darla. Can I get a shot?"

"What's your poison, love?"

"Two Apple Jacks."

"Two?"

"It's been a rough few weeks. I wanna catch up to everyone else here."

"Sure thing!"

I sat quietly for a few minutes, watching the people around me. I'd noticed on the couch, Jax had made it inside with his crow-eater sitting on his lap. Watching him kiss her neck and run his hand along her legs stung and made me feel stupid and jealous. I turned my focus back to the bar until I felt eyes on me. I turned and searched the room until I landed on a man I'd never seen before. He was sitting not far away from Jax and he was staring at me with a bit of a grin. His eyes were the color of amber, his hair was long and as black as night, and he had muscles for days. He was wearing a cut that indicated he was a Son but he was for the Oregon chapter. Everything about him made my mouth water and I smiled at him. He smiled back. Darla put the shots in front of me and I downed one and turned to look at the handsome stranger again, his grin even wider. I chanced a glance at Jax, who was still all into the girl on his lap. Figured.

I downed the second shot and turned my eyes away from the man who had been at my side for several weeks and focused on another Son. If it was good for the gander, then you may as well call me a goose.