AN: After two months with no internet, we are back. Congratulations, you get a solid week of daily updates!
Hashirama looks from one person to the next, trying to figure out if he should smile or be serious. He is so happy the Leaf is thriving, and that the Uchiha girl is alive (for now anyway) and that Tsunade is coming (yay!) but this all seems like such a serious situation. Then he sees something on the Uzumaki woman's arm.
Hashirama walks over to the Uzumaki who introduced herself as Kami and peers at her arm. "Is that the Bite-Healing Kekkei Genkai?" he asks.
"Yes," snaps Kami, pulling her sleeve down to cover the numerous bite marks on her arm. "Got a problem with that?"
"You're…!" Hashirama stares at Kami. "You're…!" Hashirama realizes just who he is looking at and bows. "Your Highness."
"Eh?" says Rain. "Why's she a Highness?"
"She is the Queen of the Uzumaki Clan," says Tobirama, mirroring Hashirama's bow. You always bow to the Uzumaki queen, or princess, if you value your sanity and continued existence. Always.
"Mum?" says a girl with short red hair and glasses, tugging on the Uzumaki queen's sleeve. "You should sit down. You used a lot of chakra."
Hashirama straightens up in astonishment. "Why is the Uzumaki princess wearing a Leaf headband?"
"The Hidden Whirlpool was destroyed in the Third Shinobi war," explains Hiruzen. "A few of the survivors made their way here. Iruka over there is the last known member of the Umino clan."
Hashirama looks at this Iruka guy. He looks like an Umino. "Hello," says Hashirama. "I'm Hashirama Senju, the First Hokage." Hashirama beams around at everyone. "I'm so happy the Leaf is doing well, even though it just got attacked, and the Whirlpool was destroyed, and…"
"Shut up, Hashirama," says Tobirama.
Hashirama crouches down, feeling depressed. Tobirama is so mean!
"You're the First Hokage?" asks the young woman with the baby. "Will...Will you teach me about the woodstyle, please?"
Hashirama instantly cheers up. "Can you use wood style?"
The young woman nods. "Yes, I can. But not because we're related, or anything. It's because of..." She trails off and looks down at the floor.
"Because of what?" asks Hashirama, confused.
"You met Orochimaru?" says Hiruzen. "The one who summoned you? He also does human experimentation. Tenzou can use wood style because he grafted your DNA into her."
"My DNA…" Hashirama considers this. Then he grins. "So then you're practically my kid!" He hugs the young woman, Tenzou, joyfully, being careful of her baby. "Tobirama, look, I have a daughter!"
Tobirama facepalms.
The girl with the buns in her hair laughs and says, "You're a weirdo, Lord First."
Hashirama stares at the girl. He feels very sad. "I'm not a weirdo, am I Tobirama?"
"Yes, you are," says Tobirama. He pats the girl with the buns in her hair on top of the head. "You are a smart child. I like you."
"Good," says the girl. "Because I'm your great granddaughter." She smiles up at Tobirama. "My name is Tenten."
Tobirama nods firmly. "It is good to see my descendants are not total morons like my brother."
Hashirama hunkers down on the ground, hugging his knees. "Total...moron…." he whines, tracing circles on the floor with his finger.
"You see what I mean?" says Tobirama.
"Aw, don't be so mean," says the ANBU Medic Woman.
"Wait…" says Hiruzen, suspiciously. "You are not one of my ANBU."
"No," says Konan. "She is one of mine, or more correctly: one of the Hidden Rain ANBU. The leadership changed recently, and a close friend of mine is now the head of the Hidden Rain Village."
"So Hanzo stepped down, then?" muses Hiruzen. "Who's the new leader?"
"How about I arrange a meeting and he can tell you himself," says Konan. "Come Turtle, Wind, Rain." She turns to the three masked and cloaked people. "Let's go."
"You forgot to take yourself off the rinne-summons list, didn't you?" says the ANBU, whose codename is apparently Turtle, disapprovingly.
"Yes."
"Oh, here, these are yours," says Fugaku, holding out his sunglasses.
"Keep them," says Turtle. "You'll need something to stop people asking questions about your eyes." Then she shunshins away with Konan, Wind and Rain.
Then Hiruzen turns on the young medic with the white hair and glasses. "Kabuto Yakushi," he says sharply. "What's this I hear about you being a spy for Orochimaru?"
The boy smiles. "I am a spy for Wind and Rain. I am a Leaf shinobi, but I also work with them to keep an eye on Orochimaru."
"He called Wind 'Mother'," adds The Uzumaki Princess. "Is she really your Mother?"
"Yes, Karin. Wind is my Mother," confirms Kabuto. "Turtle and Rain saved her and now she works with them. And when the opportunity presented itself, I began to spy on Orochimaru for them. I have a great deal of information I can report to you, Lord Hokage, but most of it is sensitive."
"Very well, Kabuto," says Hiruzen. "I will summon you to my office later and we can discuss this."
Hashirama gets up, over his depression. He turns his attention to his new daughter's baby. "So cute!" he coos. "What's his name?"
"Minoru," says Tenzou. She looks at if she is trying not to panic, freak out and attack Hashirama.
"You don't need to be afraid of me," says Hashirama gently. Patting Tenzou on the head. "I'm your Daddy. And the First Hokage. I'm not your enemy."
Tenzou calms down and the white haired man with the crooked forehead protector relaxes. "But…" says Tenzou, sounding a little confused. "But how can you be my Dad? You're dead…"
"Oh, that's cause you've got my blood running through your veins," says Hashirama, firmly. "That makes me your Dad. Okay?"
"I've never had a Dad before…" says Tenzou, in a bit of a daze.
"Aw, you poor thing," says Hashirama, putting his arm around Tenzou's shoulders. "Let's fix that, shall we?"
"Umm…" says the white haired man with the crooked forehead protector, a dippy look on his face. "What?"
"I'm not sure what's going on here myself, senpai," says Tenzou. "Let's just roll with it."
"Okay," says the man. "We need to go make sure Aki is alright anyway."
"Who's Aki?" asks Hashirama, curiously.
"Our two year old daughter," says Tenzou. "Come on, Kakashi senpai." She wanders off, dragging the white haired man behind her.
It takes Hashirama a few seconds to process what Tenzou just said. Then he runs after Tenzou and the white haired guy yelling, "Wait! You have another baby?! I have another Grandkid?!"
"He is a moron," says Fugaku. "You are right, Lord Second. Lord First is a total moron. In the best way, of course."
"Um...Lord Fugaku, sir?" says Shisui nervously. Itachi is still passed out on his back. "I don't think Itachi is going to wake up anytime soon. Do you think we should get a medic to have a look at her?"
"I will," says Kabuto, stepping up beside Itachi and placing glowing hands on her back. "She has chakra exhaustion. She'll need to stay in the hospital for a few days. Follow me." Kabuto leads Shisui away.
Fugaku takes one last look at Sasuke, buried in machinery and bandages, and follows, dragging Rasa along behind him. Mikoto trails along behind, leaving Tenten, the Second and Third Hokages, Iruka, Karin and Okami alone outside Sasuke's room.
Once they have seen Itachi safely to a hospital bed, Fugaku and Mikoto head off to collect Eizo from his babysitter and drop Rasa off with the same man. Ibiki is a very useful person.
When Fugaku and Mikoto arrive at the T and I department, Ibiki is rocking a sleeping Eizo in his arms and humming cheerfully while his minions clear the corpses out of the T and I department.
"I don't think this is good for Eizo's mental stability," whispers Mikoto.
"Eh, he'll be fine," shrugs Fugaku. "He's our kid, after all."
Mikoto sighs, obviously forgetting the fact that she is covered in the blood of her enemies.
"Ibiki," says Fugaku softly. "I have a new prisoner for you."
"Ah good," says Ibiki. "Eizo was very good. The Invasion force was smart enough to fight quietly once he fell asleep. They still got their asses whooped, though. Eizo also learned some new words-"
"Of course he did." Fugaku dumps Rasa on the floor. "This is the Kazekage. Keep him far, far away from his kids. He is not a good role model. Also, make sure he lives, we don't want a war on our hands."
"Yes sir," says Ibiki. "Now, I'm assuming you want Eizo?"
"Yes, we do."
Naruto is on a mission. Grandma helped him pack and Pervy Sage is ready to go too.
Iruka nii is giving Naruto some last-minute advice on how to handle asking Tsunade for help. "And remember to say 'please', manners are important," says Iruka nii. "She might not come if you don't have good manners."
"Right," nods Naruto, adjusting his backpack and staring down the long road out of the village.
"Make sure you brush your hair," says Grandma, smoothing down Naruto's spiky hair. "A tidy child is much preferred over a messy one, and you want to make a good impression on this Tsunade."
Grandpa Third walks up to the gates, where Naruto is trying to free himself from Grandma and Iruka nii so he can go save Sasuke. "Naruto," says Grandpa Third. "In future you need to ask before leaving the village on unofficial missions like this. You cannot just up and leave whenever you feel like it. Do you understand?"
"Yes Grandpa Third," says Naruto. He hates having to be polite. He wants to yell at Grandpa Third not to interfere.
"Good," says Grandpa Third. "Now make sure you keep Jiraiya out of trouble and come back quickly."
Naruto grins. Then he sees Karin running towards them.
"Naruto," she says, sliding to a stop in front of him. "My Mother asked me to tell you that she can only guarantee being able to keep Sasuke alive for two weeks. They had to put Sasuke in a coma to keep her alive."
"Oh." Naruto thinks about this information. "So we have two weeks to find and bring back Tsunade."
"Yes," nods Karin. "But…" Karin glares at the ground then back at Naruto. "You better come back sooner!"
"I will!" says Naruto, feeling genuine fear for his life. "I will come back as soon as I possibly can! We'll be back in time, right, Pervy Sage?"
"Definitely," says Pervy Sage. "Don't you worry about Sasuke, kid."
"I'm not worried about Sasuke!" snaps Karin. "At the end of those two weeks, Sasuke will be healed enough to live! But I know my mother! She'll do her best to heal Sasuke, but… At the end of those two weeks, it won't be Sasuke who'll be dead! It will be my Mum!"