Week 35

Alex waited impatiently in the phone line. Tapping her feet lightly on the ground, she adjusted her glasses. It wasn't like she had anything interesting to say. Prison life was as mundane and sorrowful as ever. It was Piper's voice that she desperately craved. Things have been getting better recently. The new prison counselor was one of the good ones. And despite Piper being involved in the transfer and everything, Alex could not help but be grateful. Alex would never admit it openly but Piper was right. If their roles were reversed, she would have done the same thing and then some more.

To say that she had been making progress would probably be an overstatement. There have been some changes, yes, but mostly it has been like a roller coaster. She still used illegal sleeping pills as the prison counselor didn't want to prescribe her any. Sleep was nonexistent and painful without them. She told Piper about them. She wrote about all of her anxieties and nightmares in letters to Piper. They were easy to write about, she found out after a while. Writing them on paper felt like they happened to someone else and not her.

The prisoner in front of her finally let go of the phone and Alex released a breath she didn't know she was holding.

"Hey," She said once Piper picked up.

"Hi," Piper replied with something akin to giddiness. "How are you?"

"Alive." Alex replied dryly. "Don't worry, prison is as exciting as it ever was." She hurriedly added, knowing Piper will get worried and ask another dozen questions.

"Yeah…" Piper's voice had already turned somber. Great, Alex thought, now you have reminded her again about your miserable life and she will probably worry herself to death.

"Piper," Alex softly said. "Distract me." It was their thing now, distract or discuss. If something was bothering either of them, be it one of Piper's missions or the bad prison food or the abusive guards, they will tell the other to either drop the subject or discuss it till they feel better. Alex always asked to be distracted.

"Okay." Piper said with a low sigh. "Guess what I am doing right now."

"Buying a giraffe at the national zoo."

"Ha. Ha. So funny, Ms. Vause." Piper chuckled. "I am making Ratatouille."

"Like from the animated movie?" Alex asked, laughing.

"Yes," Piper said, a sound of metal colliding with metal came from her side. "That one."

"And why embark on such an absurd endeavor?"

"Neri, Cal's girlfriend, you remember her, right?"

"Uh-huh..."

"Well, she is hosting this party where every guest has to come with a dish from an iconic movie or something like that. So, I chose this." Because it reminds me of you.

They had sex this one time in Paris, with the movie playing in the background. They had been smoking weed in between as well. Alex had joked whether a neat freak like Piper would ever eat a dish made by a rat if it were to happen in real life and laughing at her own imagination she had fallen from the couch. She had found a small cut on her forehead thanks to a sharp-edged table. Piper had sprung into action to tend to her so quickly that Alex had wondered if she was high at all. Piper had deftly patched up the small cut. Alex had meant to ask jokingly if she was trained in medicine as well. But the thought had vanished when Piper had tucked her into bed cozily and Alex could not help but feel just content.

Alex yearned for that feeling now.

"I have no idea what I am doing to be honest." Piper continued. "The kitchen looks like a Jackson Pollock painting. I might have to skip this ridiculous party." She said defeatedly.

"Pipes, buy some five-dollar milkshakes and say it's from Pulp fiction." Alex said. Having a good career in the agency meant no social life, Piper had once told Alex. But she had seen through the half-lie. Piper had been reluctant to enjoy the small things in life because she was here in this hellhole. She will gladly suffer for the both of them but would not let Piper do the same.

"Yeah, that is actually a good idea." Piper said.

Then Piper told her about the daily politics in her office. Some tid -bits from her on going missions. Even Alex opened up a little, telling her about the new prisoners. The book she was reading and the shows she was missing out on. And when her time was about to be over, they said their goodbyes and I love you-s. Alex felt a little bit lighter that day.

Week 40

The director was briefing Piper and her team about a crucial mission they were going to be going on soon. The kinds that could make or break her career. Though Director Rawlins still hated her guts for the whole debacle, she held Piper and her team at this pedestal now, one mistake and she will be out. So, she made no mistakes. Except maybe sometimes.

Her phone rang with a familiar ringtone. She grabbed it from the long table before eleven sets of eyes could turn towards her.

"Excuse me, director" She said and took her exit from the conference before the director could give her a disapproving nod.

"An inmate from Litchfield-" She pressed one when the monotone voice ended, too eager to hear her lover's voice from the other end.

"Hey," Alex said tentatively. "Is this a bad time? I knew you would be in the office or field." She sounded nervous and timid which were not the words Piper usually associated with Alex.

"No, no, no. It's perfectly fine. I was just doing some paperwork."

"You know what, it is nothing. It's just stupid." Alex said dismissively.

"Alex, what is it?"

"It's ridiculous. I-I applied for business school?" It sounded more like a question than a statement. But for the first time in weeks Piper had found the underlying tone of hope in her voice. Alex was seeking her reaction.

"Alex! That's great!" Piper exclaimed. Some passing agents looked at her weirdly but Piper's glare in reply made them squirm and turn away. "I am so proud of you."

"You are?" Alex chuckled. "I don't know really. The counselor had me write this essay and everything. It is like a distance course under some convict rehabilitation program." Alex went on about the program for the next fifteen minutes and Piper relished in every second of it. Alex sounded so hopeful and giddy and excited that she could not help but fall a little bit more in love.

When she finally ended the call and went back into the conference room, she noticed that they had been waiting for her. The director raised a questioning eyebrow as she took her seat.

"A source called." She answered.

She was a trained liar after all.

Week 55

They had lost their visitation privileges for the next month or so after a small riot about prison food broke out in the ghettos. So naturally the phone lines were longer than usual. But she had managed. A small favor here, a good tip there and she was the first one on the phone. It had taken her some time but she realized that the rules of business were universal. Give and take.

She quickly dialed Piper's cell. She always tried to guess the best time to call. Hoped that she wasn't disturbing something important. Even though Piper always reassured that she was not interrupting anything, she still felt like she was holding Piper back somehow.

"Hi," Piper answered breathlessly.

"Hey, are you busy?"

"No. Not at all. In fact, I had been waiting for your call. There's someone who wants to talk to you." Piper said excitedly. Alex could tell she was smiling. Before Alex could react, a new voice with a slimy accent said,

"What up, stretch?"

"Nicky!" Alex exclaimed.

"The one and only."

"How? What? How are you- "Alex was utterly surprised.

"Mommy dearest came to the rescue once again." Nicky answered simply. "Lorna was getting out so how could I stay in."

Something dark and ugly stirred in Alex's stomach. Something like disgust and jealousy. Nicky was her friend, yes, she was happy for her. She really was. Nicky did not deserve such a place. But still she could not help but feel envious. Envious of Nicky's privilege to get in and out of prison as if it were a joke while she was stuck here counting her days.

"You are so whipped." Alex tried jokingly.

"Yeah, not as whipped as you." Nicky laughed rich and full. "Also did you know Blondie here is such a delightful drunk. She just went off with Lorna to dance on some Beethoven music."

Alex could hear her laughter in the background. It had been too long since she had heard Piper laugh so freely. She wanted to thank Nick but at the same time she wanted to strangle her because she was stuck here and Nicky was there. Nicky was so close to Piper, she could see her, touch her, make her laugh, make her dance while Alex was here – rotting.

"I have to go." She said suddenly. "Bye." She put the phone down before Nicky could reply and wiped away the traitorous drop of tear that had made its way onto her cheek.

Week 60

Alex did not call for a few weeks. Some riot situation she had mentioned in one of her letters but Piper suspected it had something to do with that call with Nick. She understood what Alex must have thought of it. It hurt her too, seeing Nick free and in love.

Piper read the letters attentively. Tasting each word on her lips. Reading and re-reading until her hands ache from holding them and eyes brim up with tears. There was nothing she could do except for just being there, she understands that now. It's something she and Alex had negotiated. They will be honest and truthful and respect each other's boundaries. Although, it costs Piper many sleepless nights, she doesn't regret it because it is way better than the cold silence Alex treated her with for weeks.

Right now, she was anxious to see Alex after weeks.

Piper was late today. And deliberately so. Her car was already parked in the prison parking lot. She had shut off the engine but she just couldn't get out yet. And she didn't know how long she could stall. It was not like she did not want to see Alex. She craved Alex. But she was afraid of what will come after the hellos and welcome smiles. She has bad news buried in her heart where it spiraled and threatened to spill out.

A tear rolled out of her eyes and trailed down her cheeks into clasped hands. Suddenly, Piper was reminded of the passing time. Unlike her Alex did not have the luxury of freedom. Their already short time together will be shortened even more if Piper does not stop being a fucking coward. With a deep sigh, Piper wiped the tear tracks on her cheeks and stepped out of the car. The grey and molding walls of the prison's outer perimeter already made her feel caged and sad beyond her capacity. Perhaps that was the reason why she broke down in the car. If the walls can break her like this while she was outside then she was afraid what the news she brought will do to Alex on the inside. But she cannot hide it any longer from her, Alex needed to know this even if it broke her.

The visitation room was all the same. Piper sometimes thought of it as a stage. Like a constant miserable background where actors come and play their parts and then go back to their lives. Nothing has changed in the room since Piper started coming here and somehow that provided an odd sort of relief.

Alex stalked into the room with a bright shy smile that she only has for Piper. But there must have been something on Piper's face because the beautiful smile abruptly dropped into a worried sort of frown.

Piper stood up like she always used to do. She tried to give a welcoming smile to soothe Alex's worry. But it's too late. Alex can easily see through it. Alex closed the distance between them cautiously before embracing Piper into a warm hug.

"Hey," Piper says breathlessly. "It's good to see you."

Alex pulled back and took her face in her hands and Piper almost forgot about the dull, miserable prison in the background.

"Let's sit down first, okay?" Alex said. And again, Piper was back in the enclosed walls as she remembered that they were not alone, that the prison guards were watching them with their petty stopwatches in hand.

"What's wrong, Pipes?" Alex asked as soon as they got into their chairs.

"I- "Piper hesitated. They had talked about this a week ago. Alex wanted to know how Diane was doing after one of Piper's dutiful monthly visits to the hospital. She was okay then. Well, as okay as she could be, hooked up with life support. Her heart was healing, or so her father had said. Alex had also taken the news quite nicely. They were ignorant and happy, making plans of having Diane's hand cooked meals once Alex gets out and Diane recovers. And now all those things seem like paper dreams.

"Pipes, what is it?" Alex nudged her elbow impatiently.

"It's Diane." Piper whispered. In seconds, Alex's face crumpled.

"Is s-she" Alex stammered trying to thread her words into a coherent sentence.

Piper nodded. She is gone. Piper could not say the words but Alex understood anyway because the color of her skin had gone even paler than before.

At first, Alex's face was like stone. Eyes straight ahead, looking but not seeing. In a desperate attempt to comfort her, Piper took her trembling hands and squeezed them softly. The visitation time was about to be over in a few minutes.

"Al," She softly whispered. It worked and Alex finally matched her eyes.

"S-sh-she is d-de-dead?" Alex's voice was barely audible above the chattering in the room. And Piper probably would have missed it if she were not reading her lips. Piper nodded her head in answer.

Alex squeezed her eyes shut and her hands began shaking violently. Piper held onto them even tighter. Alex's breaths were getting shallower with every second as tears streamed from her tightly shut eyes. Her lower lip trembles and red blood appeared from where she had been biting it forcefully. She was hyperventilating.

Piper stood up from her chair, still holding her hands. Two useless guards near the gate placed their hands on their hips and walked forward with smug expressions on their face like watching Alex Vause break was their dream come true. Pricks. Before she could take care of her love, she needed to get rid of these assholes.

"Special agent Piper Chapman, FBI." she flashed a fake badge at their smug faces. "I need everyone to evacuate the room." She said in an authoritative tone. When the visitors in the room saw the prisoner she was with, they quickly said their goodbyes and fled.

"Look with all due respect we cannot just empt-" A smug looking guard started.

"Hopper," McCollough interrupted. "Get out of here. Now."

That seemed to do the trick and in minutes there was only Piper and Alex in the room. Suddenly the room felt bigger than before but not big enough at the same time. Piper tasted salt on her own lips. Perhaps she had been crying too.

Piper knelt before her. Her eyes were still squeezed shut and hands still trembling.

"Hey, Al, baby." Piper softly said. "Baby, look at me. They are gone. It's just you and me."

When she finally opened her eyes, it was as if all the light had been sucked out of them. With one hand Piper removed her glasses, placed them on the table and wiped the stray tears away from her cheeks.

"Pipes," Alex croaked out painfully. "I-I can't breathe. I can't breathe. Please Pipes, please." She stammered. "Is th-this w-what what D-diane felt like-…it hurts…"

"I know. I know. I am here, baby. I am here." Piper stood up to her full height. With Alex still in her chair, she brought the hand holding her hand up to her heart. "Breathe with me, love. You will be alright, just breathe with me, okay?" Alex nodded weakly.

"In… out… in… out… yeah just like that. You are already doing great, love. Just like this, yeah." She kept breathing deeply along with Alex until she calmed down and was breathing normally again. "You are alright. It will be alright. I am here. I am here." Piper kept murmuring soft nothings to her as she hugged her head closed to her chest and cradled her hand through the raven hair. She kissed the top of her head as Alex sobbed into her shirt.

After some long painful minutes, Alex finally was able to breath on her own. Piper quickly got her a bottle of water which she reluctantly drank. She was looking at the floor with tears still streaming down her eyes. Her khaki uniform was crumpled and stained. It broke Piper's heart to see her beautiful brave lover like this but this pain, this grief was something even she could not protect her from.

Piper was sitting in a chair besides her, still holding her hands, keenly aware of the passing minutes. She knew the solitude they were granted would not last forever. Alex knew that too.

Minutes after her break down, when Alex looked up, there were red circles around her eyes and her brilliant mascara was indicating the path those tear drops had made on her skin. She rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand and placed her glasses back on. Her features painted a picture of pure sadness and defeat, the hopeful glimmer that she had come in with was gone.

"Pipes," She whispered. Her voice scratchy and hoarse from crying.

"Yes, love?" Piper said softly.

"I don't want to come back here. Ever."

Piper got up from her chair and hugged her with every inch of her life.

I promise you won't. I promise.

A/N:

It's been a year or what? Certainly, it feels like a decade. So many things happened in the past 11 months… uff… Anyway, I always thought of this story even during the busiest times. I knew I would come back; it was just a question of when. And with all the love you guys have shown in the last chapter, I wish I had come back earlier. Believe me, I would have if I could. But life kept me fucking over and over again. One or two more chapters and this story will end.

I am currently in love with the Supercorp ship. God that fandom has got some crazy good fics. Although not much of a fan for the show but love the characters.

Hope y'all are healthy and safe. Happy Reading.

Bye.

P.s. Do you guys want to see these two lovebirds married or should I just end this ambiguously? I am in a bit of a dilemma.