The Shotgun Approach

Chapter 3: Bad Habits

. . .

In retrospect, I should have thought this through better. I could really only blame myself. I mean, I wasn't cut out for this sort of thing, was I? But no, I had decided to follow this man for the past week. And I was careless. As the week waned I figured he was just unobservant. Boy, was I wrong!

I sighed wearily. The rope around my wrists was cumbersome, but the insane chatter of the demon dragging me along was worse. I was unable to tell what species he was, in such a humanoid form. I could have sworn he had something to do with the bombings. It was why I bothered following him in the first place.

Come to find out he was just some fanatic that worshiped the bastards behind the entire thing. And he didn't have any real information on them

This entire week was a huge waste of time.

So while he was still running his mouth I took the chance to mix my wind and water powers together. The ice it created traveled up from my hands to my wrists and froze the rope. It took a quick jerk of my arms to break it in half.

I wasn't much of a fighter. Never planned to be either.

That didn't mean I was weak, however.

The idiot turned with surprised eyes and I just smiled...before turning tail and running in the opposite direction.

He gave chase, as expected, so I pivoted on a dime and placed my hands to the ground. With a push of youki and a yell, I conjured a wall of thick and sturdy earth. It cut the guy off and I could hear him screaming on the other side.

"Sorry, I don't have time for this," I said. And then I just walked away. My shift started soon. And I hated being late.

"Neat trick."

I turned with a grin, "You would be surprised how many years it took to learn that."

"Of that I have no doubt," he said, falling into step beside me.

I wasn't all that shocked to see Kurama here. I'd given Yusuke a heads up about what I was doing a few days ago and for some reason he was worried for me. If it wasn't Hiei following me, it was the fox.

"Now that you've seen I don't need an escort, can you please tell Yusuke that he shouldn't waste such valuable resources?"

Kurama chuckled, "I would if I thought he would listen."

"I offered my services. He needs to let me do it my own way."

"He just worries," Kurama said. "Were you able to garner any information from him?" he pointed a thumb over his shoulder, indicating the psycho I had left in the dust.

I shook my head, frowning, "No. He made sure to make it clear he agreed with what the bombers were doing, however."

Kurama smiled sadly, "Yes, I'm sure many sympathize with them in the demon community."

It was a shame, I thought, that so many would side with these monsters. But human and demon relations were so strained...and many demons still believed they had some right to the human world. It was those types that did not care if demon lives were lost along with the humans. Because the ones that lived among the humans and did not want to kill or eat them were abominations. Living in harmony was still far off. If it ever became a reality at all.

"I can't believe I let that idiot get the jump on me..." I said, rubbing the tender spot on my head where he'd hit me with a baseball bat.

"You're lucky it didn't knock you out."

"My powers have many uses, fox. Protection is one of them."

Kurama cast me an appreciative look, his lips quirking thoughtfully. "It seems you are more than meets the eye."

And more than the drug that swam in my veins, I wanted to add. Kurama hadn't commented on it, not like Hiei. But I often caught him casting me disapproving looks when he thought I wouldn't notice. It was this that told me his words held a hidden meaning—that I was useful even though I was an addict.

What Kurama and the rest would come to realize was that I was a high functioning addict. That I had been taking the drugs so long they did not affect me as they might someone else.

And that was nothing to be proud of.

. . .

"You wasted our time following that fool."

Biting my tongue was starting to become difficult. Hiei found some way to insult me at every turn. Nothing I did was right.

I kept telling myself I didn't care.

But the more Hiei hated on me the more I wanted to make him like me. Even if it was a total lost cause.

"I saw him at every location, how was I to know he was just some loon?" I said, shrugging.

"You are just flaunting your idiocy by saying that," he said.

"Okay children, how about we do something more productive? Like, actually figuring out who the hell is blowing half the buildings up in Sarayashiki."

I folded my arms on the table and rested my head in them. We were at Kurama's apartment today because it was larger and he had better snacks. Of course, after the first few times he'd wised up and hidden them all. However, because he was a good host, he had set out tiny cakes, so I couldn't complain much. I plucked one off the plate and popped it into my mouth.

Chocolate.

I hated chocolate.

"You doin' alright, Ettie?"

I raised an eyebrow at Kuwabara, "Yeah, why?"

"Well...you've been in the thick of this whole mess. And, sometimes you seem really out of it."

The entire room fell silent. Who would be the first to spill the beans? My money was on Hiei. But to my utter shock no one said anything. While all the demons in the room were aware of my habit, it seemed Kuwabara was oblivious. It seemed no one told him.

So I sat straight in my chair and looked him right in the eye, "Those times you see me acting like a space cadet, that's because I'm high."

His face went through a series of emotions that made me want to laugh. He went from grinning, to frowning, to shocked...and then it settled on angry.

"What?!"

"I'm a drug addict Kuwabara."

He turned to his friends, looking at each of them in turn. "Did you all know about this?!"

Yusuke stuck a finger in one of his ears, his thumb brushing at his nose. He wouldn't look at the other man. Kurama kept his eyes trained on the cup of tea in his hands. But Hiei...

Hiei just rolled his eyes. "Fool," he said.

"You guys are unbelievable," breathed Kuwabara, "keeping something like this from me. How many times you assholes gonna pull that same shit?!"

"Listen, you would have figured it out eventually..." started Yusuke but Kuwabara sliced an arm through the air.

"Oh yeah?! Like I figured out Hiei was Yukina's brother?!"

The fire demon slammed a fist onto the table at that, his eyes aflame with some deep hidden rage I didn't understand. "It is no one's fault but your own. That was a secret I wished to keep and your stupidity ran so rampant that you couldn't even keep your mouth shut."

"Must we bring this up again? It was years ago." Kurama was eyeing the two men as if afraid they would begin to brawl right on his kitchen table.

"Besides...didn't Yukina already kinda know?" added Yusuke.

They ignored both of them, their voices rising in pitch. "Excuse me! But that was an accident and you know it! How the hell was I supposed to know she'd overhear?"

"You should have been more aware of your surroundings!"

"Not like I have some freaky third eye that can see through walls, unlike someone else we know!"

It was my laughter that had both of them turning to me, double looks of incensed annoyance on their faces. And that was when Kuwabara remembered the issue at hand. "And you, a drug addict?! I expected better."

"If I had never told you I would have been called a liar. The others found out on their own, I was doing you a courtesy."

"You're kidding right? A courtesy? Cripes, I wished you'd just kept it to yourself!"

I stood up and dipped my head to the room at large. I bowed, making it over dramatic on purpose. "I can see when I am not wanted."

"Wait! Don't go Ettie! I need your input!"

I turned to Yusuke and cast him a crooked grin. "I don't think you do. Looks like you have it covered."

I made to leave, collecting my bag and walking to the entrance so I could switch out my guest slippers for my trainers. Kuwabara's voice from behind me caused me to stop. "Can't you just, ya know, not do it?"

I slipped my sneakers on and without turning to look at him I said, "If it was that simple...do you think I'd still be doing it?"

I left then, closing the door softly behind me. I wasn't angry. Kuwabara would either come around or he would hate me. That was his decision to make, not mine. I would regret losing his budding friendship, but it was the price I must pay. Not everyone was accepting like Yusuke. Kurama kept what he felt to himself, though I could feel that he disapproved, whether he voiced it or not.

And well, Hiei. We all knew how Hiei felt about it. It disgusted him. And yet, while he took every chance possible to throw jabs at me, he did not show much aversion to me.

I could not blame any of them for the dislike of my habit. Even I hated myself for it.

But I couldn't stop.

I didn't want to.

. . .

"ETTIE!" the scream came too late. I was stupid. So stupid.

Why did I walk out here?

Later in the evening we had gotten a page that a priority one, R-twelve was in progress. Which meant it was a shooting with multiple victims.

We arrived just in time to watch several people get gunned down. The police were all in heavy protective gear, hiding behind their vehicles, taking shots when given the chance.

But all I could see were the bodies, some still breathing, some struggling. It was the sight of a woman dragging herself across pavement, leaving a trail of blood behind her, to try and get to safety that sprung me into action. The shouts of the police and my crew did nothing to stop me. If someone didn't do something all these people were going to die.

I reached the woman in break neck speed, not heeding the fact the gunman was still crouched behind a van across the street. I didn't know if they were demon or human. I didn't care.

"H-help...help...me. Please...h-h-help me." Gurgling breaths, blood at her lips, unfocused pupils. The woman was in shock. She'd been shot in the abdomen.

I rolled her over with gentle hands. I needed to work fast.

I snapped on a pair of gloves and pulled out a portable oxygen mask from my bag and placed it over her face. "It's going to be okay," I said.

As far as I could tell the bullet hadn't exited, which meant it was trapped somewhere inside her. She would need surgery, so all I could do for now was keep her alive until we could arrange transport. I cleaned the hole as best I could and packed the wound with gauze to slow the bleeding. I would use my powers only as a last resort. They did not always react well when used on a human.

I was listening to the woman's heart, stethoscope in one hand, when the gunman jumped out from behind the van. He had an automatic rifle and not even that was the most surprising thing about him. For the man was a demon, skin like leather and eyes as yellow as a cat's. It was unusual for an apparition to use a man made weapon and for a moment I sat stunned. When would this stop? When would peace reign, not just in the human world, but the Makai as well? What if this gave other demons ideas...and they brought these weapons to demon world?

The massacres here were bad enough. I couldn't imagine what an army of demon soldiers with guns would do to the worlds.

It was this moment of hesitation, the barest breath of time, that brought me a step away from death.

The man fired, the sound from the gun deafening. There was a spray of bullets that dropped two police officers and riddled the numerous vehicles with holes. And then there was me...normally so calm under pressure, huddled over my patient like a cowering weakling. My hands pressed to the ground, my youki bursting forth to bring up a barrier of pure stone. It blocked the policeman's view, but it was enough to protect them, to protect everyone. To protect myself.

The sound of that gun...the noise so loud...it brought back unpleasant memories. Ones I spent so much effort running from.

I couldn't let it continue. I needed to do something! Anything...

The wall of stone shattered, crumbling to pieces. And I stared, dumbstruck, at the man standing behind its remains. Even further behind him was Yusuke, the gunman knocked out and thrown over his shoulder.

Hiei cast me a disdainful glance as he walked by and said, "Your powers are lost on something like you."

It struck me hard, like a blow to the gut. Because yes, compared to him, I was weak. He just destroyed my wall with a single punch, using his physical strength alone. Even watching them in the tournaments didn't really prepare me for how strong these men truly were.

For a moment my team of EMTs and paramedics sat in stunned silence. The police were not faring any better. Until Yusuke strode over, a shit eating grin plastered on his face. "We'll take it from here boys," he said. Because demon affairs were his territory.

Not that the cops appreciated his help.

I turned to my team, "Well! Move your asses!"

They sprung into action, grabbing their bags and rushing off to assist the injured. I finished up with the woman beneath my hands, helping load her onto a stretcher and into an ambulance. I didn't wait to watch it drive off, its sirens blaring.

I went to assist one of the downed officers. He was cold towards me, having realized I was a demon, but he accepted my help. He had a broken rib, the bullet having struck him in the chest, but his vest had protected him well. He would be sore and bruised for a couple of weeks, but no serious damage.

I sent him on his way and he left with a mumbled thanks and a sneer. Yusuke found me then.

"You alright?" he asked, eyeing me up and down, looking for invisible wounds.

"I brought the stone up in time," I replied. "I'm fine."

"What kind of demon are you Ettie? I don't think I've ever seen one that uses powers like yours."

"That's obvious, you blind fool," said Hiei snidely, as he appeared beside the king as if out of thin air.

"Maybe to you," Yusuke said, casting Hiei an annoyed look.

"She uses elements, which makes her an Elementa."

Yusuke frowned thoughtfully, "Never heard of 'em."

"You wouldn't. Their genes are weak and pathetic, just as the creature before you. They have mostly died off."

The one element I strayed from, that I tried to keep sealed up because it had the power to hurt me as well as those around me, was fire. But now I felt it roar to life, heating my core to near bursting. All of Hiei's ribbing was beginning to add up. His insults hitting closer to home with each new one he came up with.

He sensed that now, saw when my eyes glowed with a holy rage. He watched the inner struggle that kept that fire barely at bay. A smirk spread across his face at the sight. And I felt that anger double – no, triple.

So right in front of him and Yusuke I pulled that tiny glass bottle out of my pocket. I flicked off the cap, attached so I wouldn't lose it by a bit of string, and shook out two pills into my palm. I crushed them in a fist and then used my finger to spread the powder over my gums. It would hit my blood stream much faster that way.

"Screw you, Hiei," I said, voice a rumble. I ran my tongue over my teeth and spat on the ground by his feet.

The glare he shot me could have melted my flesh if I let it.

"Ettie..." Yusuke breathed, staring at me with wide eyes.

"I have patients to tend to," I said, brushing past him.

He grabbed me, his hand tight around my upper arm. I knew what he was going to say. That I wasn't fit. That I should go home. That I was useless. So useless.

Before he could say a word I reached up, placing a hand over his own, and dug deep for that remaining fire the drug was successfully suppressing. A second later he pulled away with a swear, shaking his hand. I took pity on him, taking up that hand I just burned and placing it between both my palms. Ice coated the burn, soothing what was wrought.

"Thank you for your help, King Urameshi."

His gaze turned sad, but he nodded once, curt and controlled. As a king should be.

I didn't bother to say goodbye. I made sure to keep my eyes steady on the ground, watching my feet as I hopped over busted glass and blood pools and car oil.

I loaded myself into the back of an awaiting ambulance, assisting with one of the more critical patients.

The drug steadied me. Kept me calm. Kept those thoughts clawing with desperate hands at bay. It warmed me and took away the pain – the pain that was both real and imaginary.

But I could still work.

And work I did.

Until my hands were bloodied and my clothes were coated in the scent of human and my brain focused in on that one mission. My life's goal. Save them. Save all that I could.

Never let them have taken from them what was once so brutally ripped from me.

. . .

I sat at my kitchen table, a microwave dinner in front me that had long grown cold. I still held a pair of chopsticks in my fingers, the utensils hovering over the food as if I planned to consume some of it.

Except I often forgot to eat.

Tonight would be no different.

Once the trance wore off, the food would go in the trash, my body would fall into bed. The cycle would continue. Just as it did every day.

It was nice...that little break from the monotony. The short time spent with Yusuke and the others.

I shouldn't have been so naive.

Someone like me had no place among normal people.

The sound of someone pounding on my door startled me. I jolted, the chopsticks falling from between my fingers and clattering to the table. At first I thought I imagined it, but when the noise started up again I pushed my chair back and went to see who it was.

I wrenched the door open, little care or worry of who might be behind it. I could feel his energy after all, he did nothing to hide it.

For a second he floundered there, his fist still poised to strike the door again. But he recovered quickly and asked, "Can I come in?"

I nodded, stepping out of Kuwabara Kazuma's way and allowing him to kick off his shoes. He did so, his back stiff and awkward as he shuffled further into my tiny home.

"Uh," he cleared his throat, "nice place you have here."

I snorted. It was a blatant lie. My apartment was small, one room besides the kitchen and bathroom. I slept on a mattress which was thrown on the floor, the sheets half on, half off. The only thing I liked about it was the set of glass sliding doors that led out onto a tiny balcony. Sometimes I liked to step out there, stand on the railing, and pretend I could fly.

"What can I do for you, Kuwabara?"

I guided him to take a seat at my kitchen table, a two chair affair. The kitchen so small the table only just fit. He sat and I poured him a cup of coffee from the old fashioned pot on the stove. He smiled in thanks, clutching the mug between his large palms but not drinking.

He cast a curious gaze around the room, taking in things I wished he wouldn't. The half dead plant on the tiny windowsill, the lack of pictures, the drawings plastered on the walls...

Shit. The drawings.

No one ever came here. I never thought to hide them.

"You draw?" he asked.

I poured myself my own cup, inhaling the steam. "Yes," I answered with no elaboration.

"They're a little...uh...morbid, don't you think?"

I wanted to laugh in his face for how awkward he was being. But I just took a seat across from him and smiled. Yes, they were morbid—disgusting even. I drew things dead and decaying and in scenes of horror. I drew passionate couples in filth and animals rotting in forests. I drew city scapes that were crumbling around dying races. But none of that was Kuwabara's business.

So I asked again, "What can I do for you?"

His eyes shifted away from my strange sketches and settled on me. Resolve blossomed in them. "I came to apologize for the other day."

"Did King Urameshi ask you to do that?"

He shook his head, "No, I came here because I wanted to. I saw him earlier...and he looked, well, sad I guess. Not that he's ever really happy these days."

I didn't want to admit that I was a tiny bit hopeful that I was the reason Yusuke wasn't quite as sad as he was before. I liked Yusuke. Liked his company and his jokes. He didn't like what I did...but he was the only one to accept me even with the drugs.

"He thinks he messed up Ettie and...I think I did too. I don't like...that you do, ya know, but you aren't a bad person as far as I'm concerned. You're a hard worker. You save lives."

I looked down at the table, dragging a nail across the wood and putting a slight gouge in its surface. "You're point?"

"I want to help you, Ettie."

I did laugh this time. Cold and derisive and sarcastic. I pushed away from the table and stood from my chair. "I don't want anyone's help, Kuwabara. I'm not some damsel in distress. The drugs are part of who I am now and you liked me just fine before you knew."

He stood too, much faster than I had, toppling his chair over. "I don't think it needs to be that way! You need to get help, Ettie, please! I want to help you – "

I cut him off with a sharp slice of my arm through the empty space between us. My head was hung, hiding me from his view with my hair. "I don't want or need your help. I'm not some charity case."

I marched away from the table to my front door and threw it open, a pointed hint for him to leave. But true to his nature, he stood firm and flat out refused. "Fine, if that's what you want I can't force you. But I can be there for you when you need me."

He pulled out a piece of paper from his pant's pocket and handed it to me. A number was scrawled across it in sloppy handwriting.

"Anytime, you hear?"

I looked up at him, this six foot man with a heart of gold, and felt my eyes well. Pathetic.

I swallowed hard and nodded, "Sure. Okay."

"Good," he said. "And as for Yusuke. Don't be so quick to think he judges you. He comes from a rough background and I think you two could be really good friends."

"I-I...don't know how to be someone's friend."

"Sure you do. Look at your crew, they care about you because they're your friends. Yusuke, me, Kurama—we are your friends."

I noticed he dodged Hiei's name completely. No surprise. And I shouldn't care. Kurama was also a stretch.

I chose not to contradict him, too incapable of forming coherent responses to his heartfelt words. Friends was a foreign concept to me. I cared about my ambulance crew...but they knew so little about me. I could hardly call them friends.

It was best that I was alone.

"Thank you for stopping by. I have an early day tomorrow, so if you would please leave I would appreciate it."

"Ettie..." I was so sick of hearing my name said with such disappointment.

I held my hands out, a soft breeze floating through the room and out the door. It ruffled the hair around our faces and gave Kuwabara a gentle shove towards the door. "Leave...please."

"I really am sorry, Ettie," he said as he slipped his shoes back on.

"I know," I replied. He had given me much to think about. But I couldn't. Not now.

He paused just as he would have walked out the door. "By the way, Hiei and Yusuke caught one of the bombers tonight."

My jaw dropped and then I surged forward so I could slap him on the arm. "That should have been the first thing you told me!"

He laughed even as I continued to play beat him and he threw up his arms to protect himself. "Owe! I'm sorry – ouch! Stop hitting me!"

I relented, if only to hear the story behind the capture. Kuwabara explained that Hiei was the mastermind behind the entire plan, after catching a tendril of thought from the person in question during the last incident. There was only one – a demon of unknown origin.

"Yusuke took him to the Reikai for trial," Kuwabara said.

"I could have sworn there was more than one..." I murmured.

Kuwabara shrugged, "According to Hiei it was just the one guy."

I turned my nose up at his name, sneering. What I wouldn't do to prove him wrong.

"I'll come by to see Yusuke after my shift tomorrow...if that's okay?" I would like to hear the story first hand. See if Kuwabara had missed any important details.

Kuwabara smiled, "Of course." He ruffled my hair, making me swat at his hands. "Have a good night, Ettie."

The door clicked shut behind him.

I walked to my bed, leaving a trail of clothes behind me.

Yusuke caught the guy, huh?

Why did that thought leave such a bad taste in my mouth then?

. . .

A/N: You got to see some more of Ettie's powers this chapter. She isn't a fighter, not really. She knows how to get herself out of a tricky situation though. Please leave me some feedback guys! I know this story isn't going to be everyone's cup of tea, it's on the darker side, but that's just my style! Thanks for reading!