The Leader of the Order of Steve is old and white haired. He is wearing a rainbow tie-dyed shirt, baggy pants and a headscarf. He is sitting barefoot on the grass smoking a pipe. Sitting beside him making a daisy chain is the kid Team Iruka saw earlier.
"Sup, dudes," says the wrinkled old man, taking a long whiff of the toxic smoke he is inhaling beside a vulnerable, impressionable child. "What do you want with mah temple, eh?"
"We want to research it!" says Arashi, cheerfully. "And is that kid alright being so close to those toxic fumes you're breathing?"
"Dude, it's just burning plants, she'll be fine," says the Leader of the Order of Steve. "But why do you wanna research mah temple, eh?"
"I'm a historian!" says Arashi, becoming increasingly concerned for the kid's health. "Research is what I do! Also, I'm really curious about my daughter-in-law's village and village history."
"Your daughter-in-law, eh?" says the Leader, taking another long puff and breathing out rainbow bubbles of smoke. The little girl laughs and starts chasing them. "What's her name then, eh?"
"Kushina Uzumaki," says Arashi.
"She's my Mum, 'tebbayo!" Adds Naruto, too excited to control himself anymore.
"Wait…" Shisui frowns in confusion. "You mean you are his ACTUAL Grandpa, and not an adopted Grandpa?" he asks. Apparently, Shisui is not as smart as Arashi thought. Then Arashi remembers who got Itachi pregnant and wonders why he ever thought Shisui was smart.
"Oh, yeah, that's a super-obvious S-Rank secret," laughs Naruto, scratching the back of his head.
"You're from the Hidden Leaf, aren't you, eh?" says the Leader, puffing out more rainbow smoke.
"Yes, we are," says Iruka, taking charge of the situation. Arashi is okay with this, since he was getting nowhere. "This is Arashi Namikaze, Naruto Uzumaki, Shisui Uchiha, Neji Hyuuga-"
"Get. Out. Now. eh." the Leader lowers his pipe and glares at Neji.
"He is a branch member," says Iruka.
"I. Don't. Care."
"You are going to listen to me," says Iruka, quite firmly. "I have something to discuss with you."
"Who do you think you are, stripling?" snaps the Leader, eyes ablaze with fury.
"Iruka Umino, head of the Umino clan," says Iruka, firmly.
To Arashi's surprise, the Leader calms down, an expression of awe on his face. "But I thought there were none left!"
"An Umino?" the people gathered around Team Iruka to watch the meeting with their leader creep forward and stare at Iruka like he is some sort of exotic animal.
"Look at him, he's so serious!"
"He's like a normal person!"
"Does he bite?"
"Can I touch him?"
"Can we keep him as a pet?" asks one kid. "I'll house train him!"
"I already house trained him," says Arashi.
"I don't bite," says Iruka. "And no, you can't touch me."
The crowd recedes in disappointment, all except the little girl they saw in the bushes. She stands there and stares up at Iruka.
Iruka smiles at her. Then he crouches down and says, "Hello there, what's your name?"
The little girl squeaks and runs off to hide behind the Leader. The fastest way to get rid of a little kid is to ask it a question.
Iruka straightens up and says, "We are here strictly on business. Arashi wants to investigate the Temple of Steve, and Naruto and I wish to remove the Caged Bird Seal from Neji."
"You...want to remove it, eh?" says the Leader.
"Yes," says Iruka. "Will you help us?"
The Leader stares at Iruka and goes back to puffing on his pipe. Arashi wonders what the old man is thinking. Finally, the Leader says, "and what will you do when the Hyuuga clan finds out what you have done? Aren't you just making matters worse for the boy, eh?"
"No," says Naruto. "'Cause the clan heir is my bestest friend, 'tebayo, and she doesn't like the caged bird seal. And anyway, you never told us your name - that's rude, ya know."
"Well, well, well," says the Leader, lowering his pipe. "What have we here, eh? A young Uzumaki who knows his manners? Will wonders never cease, eh?"
"Teaching Naruto manners was no easy task," says Iruka heavily. "Even though he wanted to learn and I had help."
"You're definitely an Umino, eh," says the Leader, smiling. "Mah name is Pantsu Uzumaki, eh."
Arashi sees Shisui bite his lip to keep from laughing at the fact the Leader of the Order of Steve is named Panties. Arashi finds he is neither cares nor is surprised by this name. It seems fitting somehow.
"Nice to meet you, Pantsu, 'tebayo," says Naruto, politely.
The Leader, Pantsu, smiles. It is truly terrifying. Arashi wonders what Pantsu is up to. "So," says Pantsu. "What do you want to know about the Caged Bird Seal, eh?"
Naruto screws up his face in thought. "I want to know where it came from, why it's so evil and why anyone would want it in the first place. And also why it's not a forbidden jutsu."
"Well, that is quite the question, eh," says Pantsu. "Well, back in the early days of the Hidden Leaf, the Uchiha clan approached the Uzumaki clan wanting a seal that would lie dormant on their skin until they died. When they died, the seal would destroy all traces of their sharingan. So I set work and made the Hidden Bird Seal, a seal that does nothing until the person wearing it dies, then it destroys all traces of doujutsu and kekkei genkai. The Uchiha clan started wearing the seal, all of them, even the ones who did not awaken the sharingan. Of those alive at the time, only Madara did not get the seal, eh."
"Why did you call it the Hidden Bird Seal?" asks Shisui.
"Because, young Uchiha, it hides things, and there was a bird nearby when I came up with the name, eh." Pantsu nods firmly to emphasise his point and carries on with the story. "Then the Hyuuga clan wanted it too, so the Uchiha clan gave them the seal formula as a show of goodwill. But the Hyuuga clan wasn't interested in the Hidden Bird Seal as it stood. They tampered with it and created the Caged Bird Seal. Realizing what they had done by giving the Hyuuga clan the Hidden Bird Seal, the Uchiha clan stopped using the seal. And I stopped using fuuinjutsu, eh."
Neji and Shisui turn to stare at eachother.
"So...it's my clan's fault…" says Shisui
"No…" Neji says slowly. "This may surprise you, but the Caged Bird Seal actually made things better for the branch clan. Before that they simply took and destroyed our eyes if we awakened the byakugan, or implanted them in a main house member that hadn't awakened the byakugan. At least with the Caged Bird Seal, we got to keep our eyes."
Naruto is staring at Neji, open-mouthed.
"When did you learn that?" asks Arashi, shifting his weight to sit more comfortably on the grass.
"Not long after the King of the Moon kidnapped me, Hinata and Hanabi," says Neji. "And Uncle Hiashi killed him in single combat and became King of the Moon."
"You've been to the moon!?" Naruto says, his eyes wide. "Take me there sometime!"
"Okay," says Neji. "Once this mission is finished I'll take you to the moon."
"YAY!" Naruto throws his hands up in the air and grins. Then he turns back to Pantsu. "So will you help us take the Caged Bird Seal off Neji, 'tebayo?"
"Perhaps, eh," says Pantsu.
"What about the Temple of Steve and the Order of Steve?" asks Arashi, feeling a little miffed that his bodyguards are stealing his research opportunities. "Will you allow me to research them?"
"Maybe, eh," says Pantsu, puffing on his pipe. "What are you gonna do after you're done here, eh?"
"We are going to visit each of the other three Temples and the Hidden Whirlpool," says Arashi eagerly. "I have an idea about what might have happened when it was destroyed." Arashi has never told anyone, but the deeper he delves into the history of the Whirlpool, the more he realises that nothing about its destruction adds up.
"Well, I'll see about that, eh," says Pantsu. "I might help you - but on one condition."
"What's the condition?" sighs Arashi, knowing how this is going to play out.
"I want to accompany you on your trip," says Pantsu. "It's been a while since I had an adventure, eh."
Arashi looks over at Iruka to see what he thinks. Iruka shrugs, unhelpfully leaving the decision up to Arashi, since this is technically Arashi's mission. Arashi had suspected that Pantsu would try to come on the trip. He vaguely wonders if anyone else from the Order of Steve will try to come along too. "Certainly," says Arashi. "But we don't want to attract too much attention, so we can't afford to have more than one or two people join us."
"So you're saying I can't bring the entire Order, eh?"
"Exactly," nods Arashi.
"Can I come?" asks the little girl, peeking out from behind Pantsu. "I want to stare at the Umino. I've never seen one before!"
"Alright," says Pantsu, turning to address his followers. "Burifu will come with me. The rest of you are to stay here and guard the Temple while I am gone. But before that: LET'S PARTY!"