LIFE IS THE ART OF CHOICE-4
Hello all. Thank you very much for all your wonderful reviews yesterday. Each one of them is always precious to me...As you remember, yesterday, Miss O'Brien gave Charles a very bad news and she left him with a heavy burden, while Elsie was still with Joe in his inn room. Let's see how this complicated situation can be solved...
When Miss O'Brien went upstairs, leaving Charles all alone, with the terrible news, that she passed to him with such pleasure, he came back to his pantry and sat in his chair, feeling like he was about to collapse...He hid his face in his hands and his heart was beating so heavily in his chest, that he couldn't take it...He wanted to cry, he was in despair...So Elsie not only has met with her former beau, who doubtlessly proposed to her, but she also went into the room with him...
For a moment, he felt terribly disappointed with her actions...He has never thought of her as a woman with no standards, she has never given him a reason to think about her that way, even on this night, when they've shared some of their hot kisses and caresses, he was aware of the motive of her actions- she loved him and there was no doubt about it..Brave things that she did that night, were all signs of her love for him...That's why it was so difficult to understand now, why she was suddenly capable of doing something so improper for woman-to go to the room with the man, who was not her husband, in the middle of the night...He almost saw them, standing in the pale light of the moon, holding and kissing... A ferocious instincts woke up in him..He felt that he would be able to kill that man...Just because he reached for something, that belonged to him-Elsie...He might have known Elsie longer than Charles, but Charles was sure, that her heart belonged to him...
He thought that he will go mad from his hurt feelings and his broken heart..He loved her so passionately and his sadness has quickly transferred into anger, as his tormented mind gave him the horrible images-Elsie being kissed, touched and caressed by that man, who he didn't know anything about, other than he was her former beau...If she was in love with him in the past and he was in love with her-which was probably true, it was more than possible that they were...Charles paced his room in anxiety...He couldn't do anything about it..Elsie was not his property...He didn't have any rights to her, other than the right of love, that he felt for her, but she didn't know that..He pushed her away so cruelly..He was wondering, if his awful and unforgettable reaction, has drove Elsie to this point...She felt so devastated by his actions, that she decided to do some desperate step to forget him...
"Oh Elsie, Elsie...Where are you?...Elsie please come home...Please come back to me..."-he whispered those words, into an overwhelming silence of the night...Having a crazy hope, that she can hear him somehow...
Meanwhile at the inn...
Joe showed Elsie his room at the inn and she told him that the rooms were indeed very pretty. The accessories in the room were very modest, but nice to look at...They've talked for a while and when Elsie was about to ask him, to walk her home, Joe said something that took away her peace of mind...
"Elsie...Before we go..Before I will walk you back to the Abbey...There is one important issue that I need to discuss with you..."
"What is it Joe?"
"I made an offer to you today...I told you all about my life and everything, but I haven't mentioned the most important part..."
"Which is?..."
"The reason that I want to marry you...I know that you may think, that I'm asking you about it because I'm a widower now and I need somebody to run my house...Maybe that's partly true, but only partly...The fact is, that I love you and I want to take care of you...I have always loved you and I'm hoping that you will love me too...Please don't say anything...Just remember that, when you will consider my proposal..."
Before Elsie could answer to that rather surprising confession, Joe has approached her and he put his lips on hers, giving her a kiss...Very steady kiss...So different from the one that she has exchanged with Charles more than a week ago...She didn't feel anything when he kissed her...No rush of emotions, no heat, no warmth inside, no passion-nothing from those things, that she felt, when she was kissing Charles...In fact, when he kissed her, she felt like she has left her own body for a while and looked at this surreal situation from another person's point of view...Joe was getting warmed up and just as he was ready to go further with this, suddenly Elsie broke away from him, like the thunder struck her... She open her eyes wildly, thinking that she probably was getting insane, because she could swore, that she heard Charles's voice, asking her to go back home to him...She started to shake, like she had a fever and Joe noticed that and he felt pretty embarrassed, attributing her current state to his actions..
"Oh God Elsie, I'm sorry...I really didn't mean to scare you..I just...I was dreaming about kissing you for years...And this night...You look so beautiful, that I just couldn't resist...I know that you are not used to that...I'm sorry..I wasn't going to take an adventage of you in any way...I would never do that.."
"It's all right Joe...I'm not angry at you..I just need to..I need to go back home already...It's really late and I'm very tired...Can you please walk me to the Abbey?"
"Of course Elsie...I will walk you back safey to the Abbey door."
They went towards the Abbey..Joe was trying very hard, that Elsie forgot what he has done and he was talking all the time, which she was happy about, because she felt very anxious...Not because of Joe's kiss, but because of some inner, bad feeling...She didn't know what it was, but she never doubt, that it had something to do with Charles...
She sighed with relief, as they finally reached the back door of the Abbey and she said goodnight to Joe, as quickly as it was possible, promising to him, that she will contact him soon, giving him her answer... She watched, as he slowly disappeared into the darkness of the night and she entered the servants corridor quietly...She was relieved, when she saw that there was empty and quiet in there, although, that was easy to predict, considering that it was almost midnight. She was about to flash by the corridor and went to her attic bedroom, when she stiffened, seeing as the door of Charles's pantry are opening up...She held her breathe, when she realized, that he was still awake, waiting for her...Her thoughts were running crazy, but she figured, that she should behave distinctly and with dignity, as much dignity as it was possible, in those circumstances...
"Mr Carson...You have startled me a bit...I wasn't expecting anybody here at this hour..."
"I'm sure that you weren't...May I know, what took you so long? Everyone else has came back from the fair long time ago, but from what Miss O'Brien has told me, you had much more interesting matters than a country fair tonight..."
"Miss O'Brien? What did she have to say about my evening? I don't understand?"
"She saw you, when she was coming back to the Abbey..She saw you standing in the pavement, with a gentelman friend...She told me with a great detail, how he kissed your hand and how you have both entered into the inn room ...Together..."
"I see...As always she wasted no opportunity to meddle in someone else's affairs..."
"Affairs...I think that this term is quite suitable here Mrs Hughes..."
"What do you mean by that?!"
"I mean, that if an unmarried woman is coming back home, in the middle of the night, spending an evening with a man, it can only mean one thing! What were you doing with this man Mrs Hughes?!"-his anger was getting more and more strong...But so was hers...
"Mr Carson, what I am doing with a man, in the middle of the night, in my free time, is my own, private business! Certainly not yours! Who gave you the right to ask me about such things?!"
"You are so very wrong Mrs Hughes! I'm responsible for every member of this staff, including you! I am the head of this household and I have to watch what you are doing, even in your free time. You had no right to behave improperly and expose this house for gossips! I won't let you do it!"
"That's enough Mr Carson! I don't want to listen to that anymore! Do you even hear yourself? Do you know what you are saying to me? You are not a custodian of my morality and you have absolutely no rights to talk to me that way! Do you understand?! No rights at all! I have spent a lovely evening with my dear, old friend, who respects me very much and whom I intend to marry soon and what we did during that meeting, is our own matter! Just for your information Mr Carson-this is only first of many nights, that I intend to spend with him and it is possible that on the next one, I will not be back before the dawn!"-Elsie was so furious, as never before in her life and she turned around, heading towards the stairs, in the servants hall, wanting to run away from him, as soon as possible...
Her steps were very rapid, but Charles's were faster...Before she has managed to realize, he overtook her and grabbed her in his arms, so tightly that she couldn't get away...He started to kiss her forcefully, with such an overwhelming passion, that she would have certainly fell to the floor, if he didn't hold her in such tight embrace...In the beginning, she was trying to pull away from him, but he never gave her a chance to do that...When they were both out of breath and he stopped the kiss for a moment, she looked like a mess.. Her hair were tousled, her cheeks were pink and her lips swollen, from his almost violent kisses...He still held her tightly and she was the one who spoke first:
"Let me go! You have no right!..."
"I have every right! Every right in the world, because I love you! I love you so much, as I've never loved anyone before in my life! Don't you see it, don't you get it?! You are mine and only mine!"
"You are lying! You don't love me! You rejected me two weeks ago and you ridiculed me and my feelings! How dare you to insult me now, just because you are behaving like a dog in the manger?!"
"That's not true! I love you! I always loved you and I will always love you...And you love me...I don't believe for a second, that you could...That you and this man could...Never! You belong to me...Elsie..."
Rest of his words has sunken into next kisses...He kissed her like crazy...Like he wanted to devour her, right here, in the middle of the night, in this dark corridor...The whole world has stopped and there was only her and nothing else existed for him...
Elsie's body was on fire, she has now totally surrendered to his hot kisses...His sudden declaration of love, brought tears to her eyes and she never felt so out of control, like she was now...His lips left hers and moved to her face...He kissed her fervently...All of her face, her neck...And she was melting in his arms..Her knees trembled and she wanted him to never stop doing that...
"Charles...I love you...Of course I love you...It was always you..Nobody else..I could never do anything with Joe...You are the love of my life...I just felt so hurt by what you have done then..."
"I know Elsie..I'm so sorry.. I never meant to hurt you..After that night..I felt so scared...So confused, so unsure about our future, about the reactions, that we may cause with our marriage...It's not a good explanation..I know...I was worrying about my job so much...You know how much it means to me...But tonight, when you were..When I thought that I lost you to another man...I understood, that no job in the world, is worth that...I will do whatever it takes...To marry you...I can leave Downton, if that will be His Lordship's wish..I don't care...I can loose this job, but I can't loose you...You are my world...You are the most precious thing that has happened in my life...I can't imagine spending a day without you..."
"Charles...My love..."-now, she was the one kissing his face, kissing his tears, which suddenly appeared..."I love you so much...I'm ready to give up everything for you...I don't care if I'm the housekeeper or not...I want to be your wife...To take care of you for the rest of my life...I couldn't imagine my life without you either..."
"Elsie..."
"Charles..."
"Let's go back to my pantry...I want to hold you..I need to hold you now.."
She went after him and when they sat on the sofa, he took her in his arms and she nestled into him...She felt so warm and so loved...She knew that it was certain this time..That he won't back down..That no matter what, they will be together...She felt his lips on the crown of her hair..He was kissing her with such reverence...That she didn't feel before from anyone...
"Charles...What will we do? Do you have a plan for us?"
"I will speak with His Lordship tomorrow...We will just have to wait for his reaction...If he will let me or us, stay here, we will stay, if not.. I will think of some other way for us..."
"But if he won't agree...Will you be able to live away from Downton? To start somewhere else? Will you be happy?"
"Of course I will be happy Elsie...I'll be with you..There is nothing more wonderful, that I could imagine...Downton is an important part of my life, I won't deny...But you are the most important...You are everything..."
"You are everything for me too...I thought that I will never live to this moment..."
"It's all my fault...I'm just a sad, old fool...I will talk to His Lordship tomorrow..."
"You are not a sad, old fool and even if you are..You are my sad, old fool now...I will have to speak to Joe..."
"Why on earth do you need to speak with him?!"
"He asked me to marry him tonight-remember? I said that I will think about it..."
"You were ready to..Marry him?"
"I was thinking about it, but..."
"But what?"
"When I was with him, I thought I heard your voice calling me, asking me to come back home...I know that it sounds crazy, but I could swore, that you called me and I came back home, to you..."
"Elsie, this is not crazy...I was calling you...I was standing here, in this room, asking you to come home, to me..."
"Charles...Do you realize what that means...How strong our love is?"
"I know darling...It is very strong...I never thought that you could love somebody the way I love you..."
They've kissed again, this time, with less passion, but with more tenderness...
"I will speak with Joe tomorrow, I hope he will understand..."
"If he won't, I will make sure that he does! You are my woman and that's how it always will be..You belong to me Elsie..."
Elsie smiled, hearing Charles being so possessive...She really liked that...
"And you my dearest belong to me, not to the Abbey...Just remember that tomorrow, when you will talk to His Lordship..."
"I certainly will!"
That's all for today my dear ones...That was another long chapter...I don't know what is it with those two...When I start to write about them, I can't seem to stop...So Charles behaved like an a**ole, but what's new? I like feisty Elsie and the eruption of passion was worth it ;-)
Sorry for any errors...I have a request for you...Please tell me, if I should end this story here and leave them happy, with hopes for the future, or should I continue, writing another chapter about the family reactions for an engagement and Joe Burns reaction for a sudden rival, that appeared out of nowhere...I will let you decide...As always, the majority has the leading vote! Unlike in the US elections (sorry for that little joke) :D Stay safe and see you soon!