Chapter Four: The Sweet Sounds of Nature
Chris: [narrating] Last time on Total Drama Reloaded, the contestants were hanging on for dear life as they struggled through any obstacles that came their way on the monkey bars. Soon, it was down to Dawn of the Pulverizers and Robin of the Punishers to see which figure in green had the guts to stick it to the end. And as it turned out, Robin is particularly ticklish down there, hey, his choice if he wants to parade around without any undergarments. [chuckles] In the end, Dawn stuck it out the longest to win the challenge for Team Pulverizer and Jo managed to enforce her new alliance into giving Vinyl the boot outta here. [on-screen] Will Jo's alliance remain intact, will Balto come out of his shell with his little pity party going on? Find out right here on Total...Drama...Reloaded!
[cue theme song, the episode continues]
[scene shows the night sky lingering over the spa hotel as Balto heads toward the males bedroom when he sees Dawn out on the balcony mediating]
Balto: Hmmmm…
[the moonchild senses the wolfdog's presence as she opens one eye before opening the other]
Dawn: Why, hello, Balto. I've been expecting you.
Balto: Uhhh, you have?
Dawn: Yes, because I feel that there is a great matter of importance that needs to be discussed considering you. I can sense the anxiety radiating from you given your...situation.
Balto: [blinks in surprise] Oh, w-what ever could you mean by that…
Dawn: I can see that inside you lies the wallowing feeling of emptiness and it has been tearing at you for a while now.
Balto: [looks away nervously and begins to turn away] Oh, well, look at the time, I'd better be getting to bed now…
Dawn: You know you don't have to hide anything from me. I can assure you that I won't judge.
Balto: [turns around in the direction of the human girl] Look, I've got a rather personal issue at hand and I'm just not comfortable saying it out loud. Surely you can respect that.
Dawn: I completely understand where you're coming from, but it isn't wise to bottle these feelings up if you intend to live with them long term.
Balto: I just…[sighs]...I can see that I'm not getting out of this with you...but if I tell you, will you promise not to say a word of this to anyone? I'd rather the others find out on my own terms.
Dawn: I can assure that nothing that is said here will be heard by the others. You have my word on that.
Balto: Very well. The thing is that…
[as the wolfdog begins to explain to the moonchild about his situation, neither of them notice Rufus from down the hallway hiding behind the wall before the balcony, listening intently to what's being said]
Rufus: [under his breath] Interesting…
[scene cuts to Balto about to enter the male bedroom as he sees Rufus approaching from the opposite direction]
Rufus: Why good evening there, Balto. Off to bed, I see?
Balto: Well...yes, I suppose.
Rufus: Good, good, just a quick question, you wouldn't happen to know of any hidden information, would you?
Balto: Huh? What do you mean by that?
Rufus: Oh, it's nothing, really. I just couldn't help but feel a twinge of remorse for you in your...current situation.
Balto: Hold on...what are you saying?
Rufus: I couldn't help but overhear your little conversation with Dawn and let me tell you, it was not at all what I was expecting to hear, especially coming from the likes of you.
Balto: Hey, that information was meant to be classified!
Rufus: And you're doing a fine job keeping it that way by shouting.
Balto: YIP! [covers his mouth with embarrassment...and then sighs as he removes his paws from his muzzle] What do you want, Rufus?
Rufus: Oh, nothing much. I just want to know if I have a token of your loyalty.
Balto: And why, pray tell, should I entrust my loyalty into you?
Rufus: Well, let's think about that for a second, from what I can gather, you haven't informed Steele about any of this.
Balto: Well...yes, and I feel like I have the right to keep it that way. Who knows how he'll react.
Rufus: Then that's something I'd be interested in seeing. But there is a way to prevent any of that from happening, just to prevent anymore...ruffled feathers between the two of you so to speak.
Balto: [blinks] What did you have in mind…?
Rufus: It's like I told you before, I have your loyalty, you don't vote for me in the case we lose and I keep your little secret from the stud in black and white finding out.
Balto: [his face turns a light hue of red at the fox's description of the malamute in question] Uh...well...thank you...I guess…
Rufus: [with an innocent smile] Any time. [walks over to the door of their bedroom and enters, all while concealing a devious grin]
[static buzzing]
Rufus: Ah, blackmail. One of the most efficient practices into getting people to do what you want. I meant what I said about keeping Balto's little secret hidden for the time being, but nothing says I can't have a little fun while doing so.
[static buzzing]
[Rufus sees Steele lying on one of the beds and decides to tease the malamute in front of Balto]
Rufus: I say, Steele, me' lad, has anyone ever you that you've got quite the physique out there?
Steele: Hmm? Ah, well, good to know someone's taken notice.
Rufus: In fact, I think me and my colleague would be honored if you could show us a little session of what a real man looks like.
Balto: Huh, what?
Steele: [softly chuckles at this] Tryin' to butter me up, are ya'? Well, I'm not one to let an opportunity like this slide. You jealous a' these guns? [pumps out his right arm]
Rufus: [looks on with a coy grin and then looks back to see Balto staring at the spectacle as well] Oh, I'm so envious, and I think someone else is…
Balto: [suddenly realizes the ploy and his face flushes a deep shade of red] Hey! You did that on purpose!
Rufus: Did what on purpose, might I ask? I didn't cause you blush.
Steele: Aww, is wolfy a lil' shy a' these? [pumps out his left arm with a smirk]
Balto: [turns away with embarrassment at the spectacle] Uh, I'm gonna head to sleep right about now! [quickly puts the covers over his head]
Rufus: Mmm, I guess he couldn't handle you.
Steele: Heh, yeah…
[unbeknownst to Rufus, as the malamute turns around on the bed, Steele's face contorts into a look of something...suspicious]
[static buzzing]
Steele: I'll admit, while it is fun seeing wolfdog squirm, something doesn't add up. I could have sworn I see him blushing and the way how he was acting so hesitant. Adding onto what he was saying about being set up by foxy, I'd say it's about time the walls come down.
[static buzzing]
Balto: Oooh, I can't believe Rufus tried to set me up like that, especially after we made a deal! But then again, he didn't specifically say anything about my little...thing so I guess that one was kinda on me based on my reaction...gah, it's getting harder and harder to keep this on the downlow.
[static buzzing]
Rufus: Oh, come on, don't tell me you wouldn't have done the same if you were in my position. Nothing's wrong with a little tease and I technically didn't break the agreement. Still, the look on his face was priceless.
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to the sun rising over the horizon as the loudspeaker interrupts the early morning air]
Loudspeaker: Attention, campers! Enough beauty sleep, it's time for another day of testing your skills of survival and trust me, this ain't gonna be a walk in the park. Meet me by the campfire pit in ten!
Anne Maria: [yawns as she exits out of the females' side of the cabin and directs her attention to the males of her team] What were you two doin' last night? All that creakin' and stuff goin' on from your side of the bed, you'd think you were doing ya' business in dere.
Axel: I mean, ya' wouldn't be too far off, snookie. [gets hit by the Jersey girl's can of hairspray] Ow!
Anne Maria: Don't you be callin' me snookie, greasy. At least my hair has substance.
Jo: [as she steps out from the cabin] More like noxious fumes. I'm surprised people can even breathe around you.
Anne Maria: I mean, I dunno how you could be talkin' considerin' you strangle people fa' a livin'.
Robin: Oooh, shots fired.
Jo: At least my skin tone's all natural, you've got at least ten layers of paint covering that body a' yours.
Anne Maria: OH! Oh, no, you did not just disrespect da' tan!
Octavia: [as she steps out of the cabin] Good lord, has all hell broken loose already? Need I remind you all that we have somewhere to be.
Anne Maria: Yeah, yeah, I'm goin'. [snorts off after Octavia as Jo follows her]
Axel: [as he begins to follow the girls] You think my hair has substance, don't ya'?
Robin: But of course, ma' dear. I think it fits your rather rrrrougish personality.
Axel: Hehe, I love when you say it like that. By the way, last night was woof.
Robin: Indeed, I figured it did me well after the events that transpired the previous day.
Axel: Guess you could say I've got the magic touch, tck-tck~
Robin: Ooooh, you~
[static buzzing]
Robin: I must say, that Axel really knows how to make a sore fox feel all the better after a session.
[static buzzing]
Axel: To all my peeps out there, guess who's got it on with a celebrity? I got me the fanboy's dream right here and it's exactly how you would picture it. Robin's got all that and a lot more.
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to the contestants all gathered at the campfire pit as Chris stands before them]
Chris: Campers, today's challenge will test your outdoor survival skills. I'm not gonna lie to you. Some of you may not come back alive. [chuckles] All you have to do is spend one night in the woods and be up by 7:00 in the morning. Team Pulverizer, your base is located near the river, Team Punisher's is located near the waterfall. Oh, and watch out for any surprises you might find on your journey. First team back for breakfast wins invincibility! [blows air horn] Well, off you go!
Emerald: [stands at attention to her teammates] Right then, I hereby decree that I shall lead the expedition for this challenge. Anyone got an issue with it, don't want to hear it.
Rarity: There's no cause to be rude.
Emerald: Well, I don't do nice. So come on! [begins to lead off into the forest]
Rarity: Ugh, that Emerald. She's so stuck-up, it's a surprise no one's tried to knock her down a peg or two.
Rufus: Interesting…
[static buzzing]
Emerald: Of course I was going to lead the expedition. I mean, can you really trust one of the others with the task of leadership. I'm the only one qualified to be given the title and that's just the way it is.
[static buzzing]
Rufus: Looks like I have the opportunity to make things a little more…interesting.
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to Team Pulverizer walking through the forest as the males stick closely to one another. Rufus ushers in a voice quiet enough so that only Balto and Steele can hear him]
Rufus: I was thinking...that Emerald's getting a bit too sure of herself, wouldn't you say?
Steele: Honestly, I don't see any reason in keeping her around if I have to deal with a stuck-up broad for a leader.
Balto: Well, what were you suggesting then?
Rufus: Well, I think it's quite simple, really. We-
Emerald: [off-screen] Halt! [on-screen] We've arrived. Now, I'm going to head to my quarters for you all to carry out the requirements needed for this…"camping trip" as you call it. [goes to sit underneath the tent laid out]
Rarity: [sighs] Might as well try and look for some food to last the night. Anyone interested?
Dawn: I wouldn't mind. We must keep our strength up…[in a voice that only Rarity can hear]...plus I'd prefer some time away from the unpleasant atmosphere…
Rarity: Hmm...what about you boys...and Rufus?
Rufus: Ow. Someone's still a bit sore.
Rarity: Hmph! [turns her nose up as she heads into the woods to forage for berries with Dawn following close behind]
[static buzzing]
Rarity: I don't trust that Rufus. Not one little bit. It's not just the instance of him trying to pickpocket me, he seems to have this rather...oily nature surrounding him. I may be perceived as being judgemental, but I stand by what I say. Unless someone else has a more valid reason for departure, in the case that we lose, he's got my vote.
[static buzzing]
Rufus: Admittedly, I didn't make the best first impression with Miss Fashionista, but I'm not particularly concerned about that because I have an ace up my sleeve.
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to the three canines in the river looking for any sort of fish to catch. With them being all alone, Rufus sees the chance to put his plan into action]
Rufus: What I was trying to say earlier is that we should get rid of Emerald. She doesn't fit with the rest of us and no doubt would prove detrimental later on.
Steele: Meh, I got no qualms with that. How about you, wolfdog?
[Balto mutters to himself as he appears to be lost in his own little world]
[Steele whistles impatiently, causing Balto to jolt upward]
Balto: What?! Huh?!
Steele: I said, "how about you, wolfdog?"
Balto: Oh, yeah, s-sure…
[the wolfdog's tone sounds a little too hurt for the malamute's liking, causing his face to slightly soften...just a little bit before he tries to shrug it off]
[static buzzing]
Steele: Did I just feel...bad for shouting at hybrid? I dunno where the hell that came from, but something about him seemed kinda...sad.
[static buzzing]
Balto: [with his face buried in his paws] MMMMMMM! My God, get a grip! [sighs] Why can't I just come clean already? Why do I have to be so...pitiful…
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to black, the episode continues]
[scene shows Team Punisher organizing their camp by the waterfall]
Jo: Tent, check. Water, check. Food…[sniffs a rather smokey scent and coughs]...what the…[turns around to see Robin having overcooked one of the fishes]
Anne Maria: [coughs] Ya'd think a woodsman would know how da' cook a simple fish!
Octavia: [waves off some of the smoke] I must agree, that is awfully charred.
Axel: Aye, it doesn't look...too bad?
Robin: No, no, I completely understand, of all the skills I've picked up over the years, cooking's never been my strong suit.
Anne Maria: [rolls her eyes] Ya' say that again.
Axel: Weeeell, you can have some of mine if you'd like.
Robin: Actually, I'm used to eating fish like this. [takes a bite of the rather smokey-looking fish]
Octavia: Riiiiiight, I'm going to stick to berries if you don't mind.
[scene cuts to evening as Team Punisher are all gathered by the fire]
Jo: Alright, listen up. We're down two and I'm not gonna have us down two more. Tomorrow, we're gettin' up extra early before those dirtbags can get a headstart.
Anne Maria: [sarcastically] Wow, another early riser. Just what I needed…
Jo: You here to whine or to win, Jersey Shore?
Anne Maria: Oh, I'm all fa' winnin', just don't boss me around and everyone'll be happy, ya' dig?
Jo: [scowls further as she narrows her eyes] Punishers, to the tent. Get as much sleep as ya' can cuz as soon as the sun rises, we're headin' out.
[static buzzing]
Jo: I'm not about to lose another challenge to those Pulverizers. I don't do losing, never have, never will, got that?
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to Team Pulverizer sitting by their own campfire as an owl sounds in the distance]
Rarity: [recoils suddenly] What was that?!
Dawn: Twas an owl. Such beautiful creatures that fly in the night.
Rufus: "Hoo, hoo, I'm an owl who's about to feast on your body!"
Rarity: [with a deep scowl] Very funny, keep it up and you just might crack the ice.
[static buzzing]
Rufus: Has that girl ever heard of a sense of humor?
[static buzzing]
Steele: Pfft, owls ain't scary, if anything, this is scary. [shows off his sharp fang with a bite]
Rarity: [shudders] Could we please talk about something else?
Emerald: Quite frankly, I wish you'd all stop talking in general. We need to be up early before those blasted Punishers.
Dawn: I must concede, it would probably be in our best interest to retire early.
Steele: Well, I was hoping for some late night fun, if ya' know what I mean~
Rufus: Oooh, I'm sure he knows it as well~ [glances at Balto with a smirk]
Balto: [tries to conceal his blushing face] W-What?
Rarity: Ugh, manners isn't in your dictionary, is it?
Steele: Aww, is Princess a whittle disappointed I'm not as gentlemen-y as she was expecting?
Rarity: Actually, you're exactly what I was expecting.
[as the unicorn passes the malamute to the tent, he's left at a loss for words]
Steele: [scowls after a few seconds] Pfft, bitch…
Rarity: [off-screen] I heard that!
Steele: Good.
[scene cuts to Rarity inside the tent as she snaps a stick in two]
Rarity: [muttering] Of all the people to get paired up with…
[scene cuts to later in the night as the members of Team Pulverizer are seen fast asleep...all except for one...Balto, as quietly as he can muster, slowly steps out of the tent and decides to talk a walk along the river]
[Balto is seen coming to a stop at a lonely part of the river as he sits down to contemplate, gazing up at the full moon and feeling a sense of sadness wipe across him]
Robin: [off-screen] You alright there, dear chap?
Balto: GEH! What is up with people...oh...it's just you, Robin...what are you doing out here?
Robin: Well, I figured that I would take a little nighttime stroll to see the beauty of the night sky...I take it you came out here for similar reasons?
Balto: Well...you're not wrong entirely...the moon's truly a beautiful sight, surrounded by the stars in the sky…
Robin: Indeed it is...you said I was entirely wrong, so
where was I incorrect with my statement?
Balto: Well, it's just...no, it's nothing, really…
Robin: You don't need to fret, I'm not one to judge. You can tell me…
Balto: I...don't know…
Robin: I won't pressure you if it makes you feel better…
Balto: [glances at the English fox...and sighs]...I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm just feeling really down as of late...with what's been going on back home...my relationships...everything's just been a mess…
Robin: Ah...I can see where you're coming from...I had a similar experience, but I've managed to put it behind me to focus on moving forward…
Balto: You know, I wondered why you were so open and flirty with that Axel guy.
Robin: Well, if it wasn't apparent beforehand, you might have caught onto what some would classify as unusual behavior on my part. Well, I'll be the first to clarify that yes, I'm now swinging in the opposite direction, meaning Marian and I are no longer partners. Personally, I found it rather alleviating as I realized that the life of chivalry is where I belong, where I can be free to live life the way I want to, the way I've lived it for many a year.
Balto: Wow...the way you say it sounds so...liberating...like there's no strings attached and you're being so...chipper about it...wish I could have the same enthusiasm…
Robin: And what's stopping you if I may ask?
Balto: I just...don't know how to get the words across...especially to Steele. Like, what's he gonna say, is he just gonna put me down even further?
Robin: Many years ago, I might have jumped to that conclusion, but given how I've seen that he doesn't appear to be his previously bodacious self, perhaps there's the chance that he might not react in the way you think he will.
Balto: Well...maybe that's...true in a sense...but how can you be so sure?
Robin: You won't know until you find out for yourself, ma' dear. But regardless of the outcome, I just want you to know that I will be by your side for support.
Balto: [his face contorts into that of a small smile] Thank you…
Robin: [with a warm grin of his own] But of course, darling…
[scene cuts to Chris watching from the monitor room]
Chris: Awww, doesn't that just hit you right in the feels? Especially considering what's about to happen next? [chuckles]
[while the two canines have been talking, they haven't noticed the sky clouding over as thunder begins to rumble]
Balto: Huh?
Robin: Oh, dear, it appears it's going to rain.
Balto: Wait, we were never told about this...ooooh…[facepalms]...this must have been one of the "surprises".
Robin: It would appear so...well, I suppose we'd better get back to our respective camps...farewell, my dear Balto.
Balto: Yeah...goodbye, Robin...and thanks again…
[Robin gives the wolfdog a wink with a click of his tongue as he scurries off back to his campsite, Balto following suite in the opposite direction]
[scene cuts to Balto making it back to the shelter of the tent as quickly and as quietly as he can manage. He pretends to be asleep as the lightning flashes outside and the rain begins to pelt down with a roar of thunder, startling the other members of Team Pulverizer awake]
Rarity: Gah!
Rufus: What the?!
Dawn: Oh, my!
Steele: Argh, stupid fucking…[descends into vulgar muttering]
[scene cuts to Team Punisher in a similar situation as they watch the storm rage on outside]
Octavia: Well, isn't that bloody convenient?
Anne Maria: GRR, that Chris is gonna pay fa' ruining my beauty sleep!
[scene cuts to the morning with the storm finally over. It shows Team Punisher looking rather exhausted from last night's endeavors]
Axel: [stretches out his arms] Man, that shit was bad...worst night a' my life, I'd say…
Octavia: [yawns] Can't say I disagree with you.
Jo: You can exchange your grievances later, we gotta hightail it outta here before the other team steals another victory from us!
[scene cuts to Team Pulverizer mostly asleep...apart from one]
Emerald: Wake up, you lazy clods of dust! We're going to fall behind!
Balto: [wakes up with a start] Huh! What?!
Steele: [groans]
[scene shows a split screen between the two teams rushing through the forest on the their way back to the campfire pit at the elimination center]
Chris: Well, looks like it's almost about seven and the first team to make it back is…
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Team Punisher!
[the members of Team Punisher cheer for their victory as the members of Team Pulverizer either groan or look down in dismay, Emerald kicking the ground in fury]
Chris: Team Pulverizer, I'll be seeing you at the elimination ceremony, better start hopin' for the best cuz one of you is history tonight. [chuckles]
Emerald: [as the rest of her team begins to walk away, her eyes narrow at the person she's planning on targeting] Perfect…
[scene cuts to black, at the Campfire Ceremony]
Chris: Team Pulverizer, what a surprise to see you back here...is what I would say if I were actually surprised. [chuckles as Rufus rolls his eyes] Anyways, time to see which one of you's gettin' the boot.
[static buzzing]
Rufus: Eat your heart out, Mao Mao. I'm not going anywhere and you can bet on that.
[static buzzing]
Dawn: I admit, I wasn't expecting to it to come to choosing between two people with rather misguided auras, but I feel that one of them just happens to be more understandable than the other.
[static buzzing]
Chris: Alright, the following players are safe: Dawn [catches the marshmallow]...Rarity [catches the marshmallow]...Steele [catches the marshmallow]...and Balto [catches the marshmallow]. Emerald and Rufus, it's all down to you two. Which one of you will be staying and which one of you will be getting a ride out of here? Without further ado, the final marshmallow of the night goes to…
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Rufus!
Rufus: [catches the marshmallow with a satisfied grin]
Emerald: WHAT? How dare you vote for me over him?! Don't you know that I am a certified-
Chris: Waster of time? Yes. Chef?
Chef: [appears behind Emerald] I'm gettin' real tired a this s**t. [clutches onto the green gem as she squirms about] Man, you are wrigglin' like a worm.
Emerald: GAH! Let go of me you speckle, you ingrate, you...you idiot-OOF! [gets tossed up onto the boat as Chef walks over to the driver's cabin] You'll all pay for this, you hear?! All of YOOOOOOOOOOUUU!
[the sound of the ranting gem fades off into the night as the boat disappears out of sight]
[static buzzing]
Rufus: Looks like Emerald is out and Rufus is in. And let me tell you that I'm gonna have fun with my little crusade of mischief. [chuckles mischievously as he hugs his tail] Oh, yes…
[static buzzing]
Chris: [watching from the monitor room] Huh, looks like we've got our season antagonist. What kinds of unspeakable chaos will Rufus cause now that the big bad Emerald's gone? And will Balto ever confess the full truth? Find out next time on Total...Drama...Reloaded!
[scene cuts to black, the episode ends]