Unlike everyone else, Tobirama is actually scared for those kids. "Let's hear Madara out," he suggests. "We might have him surrounded, but he has two hostages and nothing to lose."
"Good point, Lord Second," says Fugaku. "What is your ultimatum, Madara?"
Everyone waits with bated breath as Madara stands up a little straighter and gazes around at them before answering. "I do not particularly want to revive Kaguya," he says. "However, I hate this world, and I do not think it is worth abandoning my plans to save." He pauses to let that sink in. "So here is my Ultimatum: my final offer. Hokage! You and your village have one year to prove to me that this world is worth living in, or I will revive Kaguya and bring about the end of the world!"
Tobirama crosses his arms. "You are going to use that year to plan your attack, aren't you?" he demands.
"Of course," says Madara. "And I expect you to spend that year either figuring out how to stop me, or convincing me not to revive Kaguya."
Fugaku takes a deep breath. He looks very tired and anxious. Not surprising, considering his kid is one of the hostages. "Fine," he says. "One year. But we are putting it in writing, and singing it."
"What are you doing, Fugaku?" demands Minato. "We can take him!"
"NOT LIKE THIS!" Fugaku yells, turning to Minato. "Not while he has our children as hostages!"
"He won't kill them," argues Hashirama.
"I agree with Fugaku," says Tobirama, crossing his arms. "Madara might not kill those kids, but he won't shy away from hurting them. At this point nothing matters to him except figuring out if reviving Kaguya is worth it. He is trying to buy time to reconsider, and he will hurt those two if it serves his purpose."
"Lord Hokage?" says Gaara.
"Yes Gaara?" says Fugaku, turning to the young Kazekage.
"I agree with you: we should agree to Madara's terms," Gaara says. "If we try to fight him, more people will die. But if we agree, we have a chance to save him."
Tobirama stares at the kid, speechless. Save Madara? Save him from what?
"Gaara has a good point," says Mei. "Too many people have died today. We have a chance to prevent anyone else from dying. I am not opposed to you making this deal, Lord Fugaku. Now go ahead, and make sure you get it in writing and make him sign."
Iruka pulls out a sheet of paper and a pen and hold them out to Fugaku. "Here, write up the terms of the temporary cease-fire," he says.
"Thank you," says Fugaku, taking the pen and paper. "Madara, we'd better use your table."
"Are you sure that colour paper is alright?" asks Tobirama, frowning at the paper Iruka provided. It is gold coloured paper.
"Sorry," says Iruka. "I'm all out of every kind of paper except coloured craft paper."
"Why do you have coloured paper?" asks Ikkaku, who sounds as dubious as Tobirama.
"I teach at the Academy," explains Iruka. "Also, that's the only pen I have on me at the moment since I keep forgetting to put my pens behind my ear. If it doesn't work you'll have to find another."
Fugaku holds up the pen to have a better look at it. "Is this a sparkly gel pen?" he says, sighing. He obviously can see that it is.
"Probably," says Iruka. "It's probably Kimiko's."
"Kimiko?" asks Minato, tipping his head to one side like Naruto does sometimes.
"Jiraiya's illegitimate love child," says Iruka.
Out of the corner of his eye, Tobirama sees Kimimaro and Kabuto exchange puzzled glances. Kimimaro mouths, 'Kimiko?' Tobirama wonders if they know Kimiko, or if they simply know someone with the same name.
Minato turns to Jiraiya, his eyes wide, and says, "You have a kid too? Did everyone have babies while I was dead?"
While all this is going on, Fugaku walks over to Madara's table and kneels down beside it. He places the paper in between them and uncaps the pen.
"Is that going to show up on the paper?" asks Madara, eyeing the silver gel pen skeptically.
"I certainly hope so," says Fugaku. "What happened to the pens you gave Naruto and Sasuke?"
"I threw them at the barrier and they vaporised," says Sasuke, scowling.
Madara gives her a shake. "What did you do that for, Princess?"
"Because you called me Princess."
Iruka starts laughing. Tobirama has to stop himself from laughing too, but he cannot stop his eyebrows from twitching.
Fugaku rolls his eyes and says, "What heading shall we give this?"
"The Change Madara's Mind Official Document!" suggests Minato.
"That's too long," says Yahiko. "How about The Temporary Ceasefire Documentation Regarding Not Attempting to Bring Back Kaguya for a Year?"
"That's even longer," points out Konan, patting Yahiko's leg sympathetically. "But you get points for trying."
"Well I think you should title it The Terms and Conditions Surrounding Madara's Surrender to the Hidden Leaf for the Duration of a Year," says Hashirama.
Tobirama face palms. The names just keep getting longer and longer.
Apparently Madara has had enough too, judging by the annoyed expression on his already scary face. "Just call it my ultimatum or something!" He snaps. "I'm running out of patience."
"Very well," says Fugaku and writes 'Madara's Ultimatum' at the top of the sheet of paper. "Now to iron out the terms so we all understand them."
"The first thing you need to note is that I am NOT surrendering," says Madara. "I am putting a pause on my plans in order to rethink my objective in light of new evidence."
"I have no idea what you just said," says Naruto. "Mr. Nice Hokage, are you going to write that on the paper, because it makes no sense?"
"Oh dear," mutters Fugaku, stroking his mustache. "How to phrase this as concisely as possible? Hmm…"
Tobirama sighs. This is getting nowhere fast. "Write as follows," he says. "In light of new evidence regarding Project Tsukuyome, Madara Uchiha has decided to call a temporary ceasefire."
Fugaku writes that down. "Right," he mutters, scribbling down some more words. "The terms are as follows…" Fugaku looks up at Madara. "Shall we write out your terms or our terms first?"
"You have terms?" Madara looks genuinely surprised.
Tobirama is also surprised. Since when did Fugaku have terms?
"Of course," says Fugaku. "You are to stay in the Hidden Leaf Village for the duration of the year, never once setting foot outside the Village Boundaries. You are not to kill or attack anyone. The only times you may fight another person are in a sparring match or in self defense. You will live where we tell you to, and you must do whatever task we give you to keep you busy for the duration of that year. I cannot have you aimlessly wandering around the village, so I will find something for you to do, and you will do it. Do you wish to contend these terms?"
"No," says Madara, without hesitation. "They are reasonable."
"Very good," says Fugaku, and writes down his terms. "Now for your terms."
Madara crosses his arms. "You and the people of the Hidden Leaf have one year to prove to me this world is worth living in or I will revive Kaguya."
"So no pressure, then," says Fugaku, writing that down. "Is that exactly 365 days from now, right down to the second, or just this time next year?"
"Make it 365 days, we don't need to worry about seconds," says Madara.
Fugaku makes note of that too. He holds the paper up so Madara can read it and says, "Here are the terms, I am not reading them aloud because silver pen on gold paper hurts my eyes."
"I think it's the careless use of your susanoo that is hurting your eyes," says Madara, and reads the paper.
Tobirama frowns. Why isn't Fugaku reading the contract aloud? Do his eyes really hurt that much, or is he hiding something? Tobirama heads over and says, "I'd like to read that." He holds out his hand for the paper.
Madara hands it over. "Ow," he mutters, blinking.
Tobirama, still suspicious of the paper's contents, reads Madara's Ultimatum. By the time he is finished, his eyes are watering and he has a headache. "I pity you having to write that, Fugaku," Tobirama says, slapping the offending document down on the table and wiping the tears from his eyes with the back of his hand.
"The terms are acceptable," says Madara.
"Can I have those kids back now, please?" asks Fugaku, a little nervously.
"Of course," says Madara, and releases Naruto. He dumps Sasuke on the ground and pats her head. "There you go, Princess. Run along. And you can bugger off, blondie."
Fugaku darts around the table and scoops up Sasuke. Then he backs away from Madara, glaring daggers the whole while. Tobirama rolls his eyes. Uchihas.
Naruto runs over to Iruka and hugs him. "I'm so glad you're okay!" he says, tearing up.
"Ouch," says Iruka, going a nasty shade of white from the pain of having his injuries hugged.
Minato gently pulls Naruto off Iruka saying, "Don't hug him, you're hurting him."
"Yes Dad," says Naruto. Then he sees Pantsu's body. "Gramps Pants is dead? But...Pants..." Naruto starts sniffling. Minato hugs him and pats his back comfortingly.
"So what do we do now?" asks Yahiko. "It's getting late and we have a lot of wounded. Shall we stay here for a while or go back to our villages?"
"We'll stay here overnight," says Fugaku, sounding tired. "Tomorrow we will go our separate ways."